Anal irrational Deltas

[consentingadult]

To make a long story short: is it conceivable that a delta couple, both being IEEs, would become pretty anal and single tracked because of the lack of dualization and overemphasis of their mobilizing functions?

[Tallmo]

I think it has to do with Ti PoLR.

But I said, but you said, but I meant, but you meant, we have to sort this out.

(something like that)

[Adam Strange]

To make a long story short: is it conceivable that a delta couple, both being IEEs, would become pretty anal and single tracked because of the lack of dualization and overemphasis of their mobilizing functions?

By "anal", I assume you mean two Identicals becoming fixated on known solutions and insisting that those are the only ones admissible, and needing to follow the "rules", because they fear the outcome of doing things differently.

Naahhhh.

Lol.

Of course this could be a result. Without having someone around with a different solution set, both Identicals find themselves taking the same approach to every single thing (a very common problem with Identicals), and if that one approach fails, there is no one around with another approach who can solve the problem. This would lead a person to insist that the paths which did lead to previous successes be followed religiously, because they would have no flexibility or depth in formulating any alternate paths.

*EDIT*
This is actually close to a problem that I see in myself. I am not close to being dualized, and haven't been for many, many years, and I've been criticized by other people for sometimes insisting the we "just stick to the plan", even though many of the people around me (duals being absent) are telling me that the plan is a bad idea.

Hence, I'm looking for a dual for my personal life. I work with a couple of male duals at work and when they talk about solutions, I listen. I don't do that with many people. I mean, I do try to listen to everyone, if only to get better solutions than the ones I come up with, but TBH, I listen much more closely to my duals. It's like my brain fully engages when they start talking.

People who say that duals aren't necessary in your life need to be prepared to lead sub-optimal lives. IMHO.

[consentingadult]

I think it has to do with Ti PoLR.

Imho, the PoLR is always linked to the mobilizing function, because using your mobilizing too much, comes down to violating the principles of the PoLR.

[consentingadult]

By "anal", I assume you mean two Identicals becoming fixated on known solutions and insisting that those are the only ones admissible, and needing to follow the "rules", because they fear the outcome of doing things differently.

Not quite: the event that caused me to start this thread, was this: next week we are going on vacation and one of the neighbors (IEE woman) is going to look after our cats. So my SEI GF shows here how to prepare the daily cat snack and leaves the water tap running until the water is warm. So the woman says that she thinks this is wasting water, she always saves the cold bit herself, for later use.

That is the kind of behavior I recognize in lots of unhealthy IEEs: too much emphasis on efficiency and reduction of waste, to the extent that it actually costs more (in various way) than what you have been trying to save.

In their attempts to be effective and efficient, undualized IEEs usually end up wasting a lot of other, more of less invisible resources, such as time. So this is what I mean by IEEs being anal: their behavioral insistence in perfectionism in efficiency and effectiveness and in the process completely miss the target. And I have the impression that two IEEs living together can actually get stuck in and amplify this kind of behavior.

ETA: if I hadn't known about Socionics I would have thought that this woman needs a good shagging. I still think she needs one, but it has to be one by an SLI. That should get her down to earth.

[Bertrand]

yeah its like an arms race of whos morally superior and imaginative vis a vis efficiency, and ultimately that entire game becomes horribly wasteful

[Adam Strange]

Not quite: the event that caused me to start this thread, was this: next week we are going on vacation and one of the neighbors (IEE woman) is going to look after our cats. So my SEI GF shows here how to prepare the daily cat snack and leaves the water tap running until the water is warm. So the woman says that she thinks this is wasting water, she always saves the cold bit herself, for later use.

That is the kind of behavior I recognize in lots of unhealthy IEEs: too much emphasis on efficiency and reduction of waste, to the extent that it actually costs more (in various way) than what you have been trying to save.

In their attempts to be effective and efficient, undualized IEEs usually end up wasting a lot of other, more of less invisible resources, such as time. So this is what I mean by IEEs being anal: their behavioral insistence in perfectionism in efficiency and effectiveness and in the process completely miss the target. And I have the impression that two IEEs living together can actually get stuck in and amplify this kind of behavior.

ETA: if I hadn't known about Socionics I would have thought that this woman needs a good shagging. I still think she needs one, but it has to be one by an SLI. That should get her down to earth.

I've seen undualized ESI's spend a dollar to save a dime.

[consentingadult]

yeah its like an arms race of whos morally superior and imaginative vis a vis efficiency, and ultimately that entire game becomes horribly wasteful

That's another thing that I dislike about our neighbors: their constant covert lecturing, trying to teach you something. Even about small, insignificant things. Meanwhile not wondering why you are on sick leave at home because of burn out and your body is suffering from eczema.

[Bertrand]

yeah it sounds like they really need more SLI in their lives

[consentingadult]

I've seen undualized ESI's spend a dollar to save a dime.

What function would that be related to? I know an SEI who, overdrawn on her bankaccount, does not want to transfer some money out of her savings account, because she wants to save her savings! imho, clearly Ti-Mobilizing, violating Te-PoLR.

[consentingadult]

yeah it sounds like they really need more SLI in their lives

Since a month and a half, we have an inflatable spa in the garden. That thing is pure bliss, it is pure dualization without having a dual around.

My SEI s.o. told them they could use it during our absence, but they don't want to. Her excuse: she's got eczema. Well, I'm not going to argue, but perhaps her eczema would reduce a lot if she would become a little more relaxed by taking a spa bath each day?

[Bertrand]

maybe she just thinks she's going to get the money elsewhere and doesn't want to "concede" defeat. I could see ESI behaving in this way. in some sense its a moral proposition that if she just goes and works harder she won't have to budge on the line she drew in her head, so in some sense she won't until its absolutely necessary, and what is absolutely necessary is generally a little further than people imagine (creative use of power)

what do you link the eczema to, if anything? I knew a girl with eczema and I felt awful for her, and I always wondered what the deal is with that. maybe its just random, but it felt like it really was something built into her personality, as strange as that sounds, at some point

[The Reality Denialist]

Prioritizing money use in a right way is something where weak valued Te might really struggle sometimes even being anal about it.

They say you saving money comes from small sources but I would say that too much consecration in that department takes valuable focus away. Well, some Te egos can be that as well.

[consentingadult]

what do you link the eczema to, if anything? I knew a girl with eczema and I felt awful for her, and I always wondered what the deal is with that. maybe its just random, but it felt like it really was something built into her personality, as strange as that sounds, at some point

Eczema is not just one affliction, but several using the same name. Sometimes it is a pure physical affliction: I myself get eczema on my hands from disposable gloves, which almost always contain so-called accelerators, so I (working as a chef) always carry my own accelerator-free gloves with me. With some people however, I get the impression that with some people it is a stress response.

[niffer]

Eczema is linked to 1D Si of course