Does one on one interactions bores the fuck out of you?
Does one on one interactions bores the fuck out of you?
nah bruh
Projection is ordinary. Person A projects at person B, hoping tovalidate something about person A by the response of person B. However, person B, not wanting to be an obejct of someone elses ego and guarding against existential terror constructs a personality which protects his ego and maintain a certain sense of a robust and real self that is different and separate from person A. Sadly, this robust and real self, cut off by defenses of character from the rest of the world, is quite vulnerable and fragile given that it is imaginary and propped up through external feed back. Person B is dimly aware of this and defends against it all the more, even desperately projecting his anxieties back onto person A, with the hope of shoring up his ego with salubrious validation. All of this happens without A or B acknowledging it, of course. Because to face up to it consciously is shocking, in that this is all anybody is doing or can do and it seems absurd when you realize how pathetic it is.
I'm interested in @Medusa's scale of boredom there.
Not necessarily bored... Just very very awkward. But honestly, what is the mechanism of this, why is it better in groups.
I don't feel bored, rather the opposite. High-strung. I feel like suddenly, all the focus falls on me. At first it can be awkward, depending on the individual. When I am interested in the other person, I usually feel like I need to "entertain" them. When I am "warmed up" and the other person is easy to handle, I can create enough energy to sustain the interaction for a while. Some people make that easier and I naturally take over, some are somehow more demanding of my energy (to the point I feel "trapped" and want to withdraw quickly), and others are the ones who supply the energy to the interaction so I can relax a bit and let them keep up the energy.
Whenever I end up one-on-one with someone, I suddenly take much more note of my personal energy level. I tend to find one-on-one interactions more energetically "draining" than group situations, though it all depends. The better I know and the more I like the person, and the more easygoing and/or energetic they are themselves, the easier I find one-on-one interactions. It helps when the other person is also SP blindspot and/or ExFx, in my experience. That takes some of the load of my shoulders or the interaction simply flows more easily. For instance, when I am one-on-one with my SEE So/Sx sister, I never feel drained. Back when I was very new to Typology, I thought all extroverts were draining to me, and that made me go on a quest on finding more introverts. But I realized that not extroversion itself is draining, but rather the "wrong" kind of extrovert, is. Anyway, back to the point...
I feel the most in my element in smaller groups of 5-6 people, this is my personal ideal. The more the merrier, though beyond a certain point the amount of people can be a bit overwhelming, because it can become difficult to keep track of everyone, and I like for a group to be closely bonded together and "whole", I am not a fan of a group splitting up into several other ones. So I might feel compelled to keep the group together, but I tend to lack the fortitude and energy to do so, so I'll let the group split up but I won't be too happy about it, depending on how severe the splitting up is and how much it weighs on the group as a whole. Having said that, I can welcome a splitting up when the subgroup I am in is more fitted to my personal interests and more interesting than the other subgroups, and a common thread in-between them remains.
Hell is other people
I am not a social-dom, but I have strong social instinct. I focus on group dynamics, but awkwardly float through the social space.
One-on-one interactions don't at all bore me, but it's more I worry about not knowing what to say to people, and struggle connecting on the one on one. More often than not, there are awkward gaps of silence and yes, the fault is my own, I'm not denying that.
Another thing is being in a group conversation, and there are little sidebar conversations that break off around me. Then I find another one of the sidebar conversations more interesting, but I'm already involved in a conversation with someone and I don't want to be rude to them.
xII se PoLR, 9w1-5w4-2w3 sp/so
Phlegmatic-Melancholic |RCoAI| Fascinator| Newtype-secondary| LEFVl|
#JusticeforJeb_, Water Sheep did nothing wrong, High Inquisitor Of Council of Water Sheep and Water Sheep's protector
Make things right? Who are we to decide when things are right and when they need to be fixed?
I find one-on-one interactions in general a lot easier & most interesting too, except when you are forced to work in groups certain settings, where you have to come up with a result as a team. If the person you have to work together with is not someone familiar / or where you don't really have much intertype compatibility, then around 3 people is the easiest. Otherwise one-on-one is still the best.
Depends on the person I’m with