oh. I thought you put me in a box that says i only like guys who're doing well. oops.
oh. I thought you put me in a box that says i only like guys who're doing well. oops.
You sound like an IEE hereOriginally Posted by Adam Strange
What a dramatic avoidance of drama
Rejecting drama causes drama
@TheHiddenJack, you know I was raised by two Deltas (LSE & SLI), have a Delta (LSE) sister and an Alpha (LII) sister, married a Delta (SLI) and have a Delta (SLI) son, right?
If I were an IEE, my life would be perfect, instead of being in need of rebuilding from the ground up. Lol.
It takes a long time to get your head straight after your escape from Delta world.
That statement, about LIE's needing someone who is reliable, emotionally stable, and not needy, is not mine. It is a quotation. But I think it is still true. All the women I've dated have been introverts, and I admire a woman who doesn't generate drama and who doesn't need me (too much).
Here is what I'm looking for, in its purest form. http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...69#post1171969
Last edited by Adam Strange; 02-20-2017 at 04:41 PM.
That is indeed very interesting!!@TheHiddenJack, you know I was raised by two Deltas (LSE & SLI), have a Delta (LSE) sister and an Alpha (LII) sister, married a Delta (SLI) and have a Delta (SLI) son, right?
If I were an IEE, my life would be perfect, instead of being in need of rebuilding from the ground up. Lol.
It takes a long time to get your head straight after your escape from Delta world.
That statement, about LIE's needing someone who is reliable, emotionally stable, and not needy, is not mine. It is a quotation. But I think it is still true. All the women I've dated have been introverts, and I admire a woman who doesn't generate drama and who doesn't need me (too much
Here is what I'm looking for, in its purest form. http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...69#post1171969
I dunno, maybe it is a dramatic avoidance of drama, like someone said, but like to me it was as if a third presence materialized whenever this guy was around and this presence seemed out of control, like it might run off any minute now and take me with what might even be without this guy. And the truth of it is that it scared me.
tossed it on their bed with a grimace and was immediately aware he needed to get a handle on himself and did? Yes, very satisfying. It's delicious knowing a person I like cares. But what if they're prone to fits of rage and don't manage their emotions and exhibit violence? I'd be pissed they didn't get their shit together and that I had to tender my resignation.
Last edited by nanashi; 05-10-2018 at 05:20 PM. Reason: pesky awkward bed typing
If he will be cutting every woman every time they say something weird he will be alone until his death.
Maybe if i were a rich ESI he wouldn't cut me out, ha! (j/k)
I do notice this tendency with LIEs where it is actually other people who are more likely to cut the LIE out because they can come across as an a**hole. And other times they cut people out if it doesn't meet their agenda (they are quite ambitious). I'd say all in all at some point what you say might come true, though maybe not to such an extreme. Correct me if i'm wrong.
LIEs are very future-oriented and start to flounder without a clear purpose and set of ideas to realise. Open-ended, casual hangouts will make them impatient. In these situations, they'll try to coax the other person (or group of people) to reveal what they want and from whom, and make binary yes/no choices, to "get back on target". They are frequently blunt, pushy and provocative, and will try to redirect events if they sense a lack of progress towards the objective they already have in mind (which in this case, might be having sex with someone).
The "pushiness" is due to a results-focused, but speculative mindset. This is why LIEs are often called "assholes" and "creeps" socially (mainly by Se devaluing types like EII). However these same personality traits are what make LIEs so ruthless in a professional setting.
Nah...this is too dramatic. LIEs are Te base and most of them will shy away from all this drama you are colorfully describing.
Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit
Lol. Yesterday, I was talking to an ESI and her LII friend whom I'd never met before, and within about ten minutes, the LII told me I was an asshole and probably a sociopath. The ESI just smiled at me.
I was kind of surprised at how quickly the LII figured this out. I wasn't even trying.
While being an asshole generally is NTR, LIEs have a tendency to being very mouthy. Without knowing what it is you did to cause LII to express you were an asshole (did they really? they aren't that vocal) and the ESI smile at it, there is more acceptance from duals yet i don't think there is immediate acceptance. Maybe you knew this alleged dual from before?
I think on first encounter ESIs are quite judgmental so it is hard to see this scenario play out irl, though i'm not dismissing it immediately.
@Delilah All types can exhibit drama causing people to steer clear but I haven't come across anyone with a nose for it; all types seem to exhibit genuine surprise after the fact and none liked it. Most Ijs tend to over-think things and many ISFjs tend to think the worst. I wrote the following when I was trying to understand the behaviour of one specific ISFj who seemed to have been having an ego crisis at the time:
Poor Me
From words that were said
I conjured up dread,
Poor me.
I hate what was done
And think I should run,
Poor me
I feel discontent
But not confident,
Poor me
I want one of those
And help I suppose,
Poor me.
I need attention
But not intrusion,
Poor me.
I’ve been such a pain
Which drives me insane,
Poor me.
To express I’m blue,
I decry to you
Poor me.
a.k.a. I/O
I think that's garbage as a fear....that LIE would stay with you for your money. That's utterly boring. I like working on projects WITH someone, not deigning to fuck them for their money. ew. just no. i want a supportive, sexy partner with mad skillz to whom I'm also 'useful,' a knight in shining armor, and sexy.I want to build epic shit with them. if u come across ANYONE that settles with you FOR your money, you wouldn't want them anyway. I was told I cut opportunities off constantly with potential partners. It was my ESTP female friend who loved the shit out of me and wanted me to be happy. She called me her heterolifemate. But the thing was I knew it wasn't right with all those people, so WHY waste our time? It was me being honorable, not picky. I just knew what would work and what wouldn't. I'm really happy now. Maybe there was a dual for me in one of those situations and I was too hasty. I doubt it. But even so, that doesn't prevent him from going and meeting another dual now. I am a better partner now anyway than I would have been 10 years ago. I like who I am better.
and it rarely feels ruthless to a lot of us from what i've gathered. getting to the point...preserving everyone's precious time...also, I think I'm my best self when I'm sure of the goal and values, so I don't want to be just useless and doing useless things
it was weird to me to hear my best friend (dude) chide me about my past. I was talking about how things were moving more slowly than I expected with an ESI guy in the present. The introvert and intuitive best friend said:"YOU MEAN LIKE GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER AND HAVING AN ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP!?" He said it in a friendly way, but it sort of startled me. I remembered the Wikisocion description that said LIE might hurry toward sexual relations. Which sorta surprised me. is that what he meant? and/or that i seemingly impulsively cut things off? it made me kind of wig out. Like when you see something about yourself you never had. It also is confusing because it's not like you want someone to feel pressured about sleeping with you. i think i have worked out that physical expressions of internal feelings really important to me. and I think there's a Se tangible indicator for me of someone's orientation toward me and me toward them.. and maybe I didn't used to be so ept about emotions, even though i valued EQ. also i dated a LOT compared to a lot of my friends, but more first dates, asking ppl out in grocery stores/slipping my number to waiters. But my introverted friends I felt like they would sort of fall into friends with benefits or casual sex or dating Ms./Mr. Wrong-for-Them. I was really trying to find chemistry and just 'do this.' (start making a life together) But, i also definitely stayed with three ppl longer than I should have. Like I was just wanting it to work, but wasn't listening to another part of myself that knew it wouldn't.when i say make a life together, not like trying to have a baby or even moving in but just being like (pointing fingers at each other) "You, I pick you."
Last edited by nanashi; 05-29-2018 at 01:04 AM.
huh, i made it abundantly clear that i was joking, mostly poking fun of the hidden agenda 'to be wealthy'. *yawn*
I don't like these HA summaries really, they're pretty oversimplified and stupid IMO.
[Today 07:57 AM] Raver: Life is a ride that lasts very long, but still a ride. It is a dream that we have yet to awaken from.
It's hard to find a love through every shade of grey.
I've only cut two people off in my life, and they were both beta (one was an IEI female who I sorta had a fling with and the other an LSI male who used to be a friend).
It's not something I do very often, I consider it an extreme measure. The LSI I cut him off after he physically threatened me via facebook (for the second time), and the IEI I cut her off twice, once I cut her off because we got into an argument. Her ex bf was very manipulative, and in my interpretation of what happened tried to turn her against me, and he succeeded. So we got into an argument over facebook and I blocked her because she was saying such mean things. Later I contacted her again, like several years later, and it was ok until her ex bf got involved again, and she turned against me, so I blocked her so I wouldn't be tempted to answer her mean messages and thus keep the drama going - I wanted to end the drama because with her it was always drama and it is bad for my mental health.
The two people I cut off, the IEI and LSI, both had substance abuse problems too, which I find often leads to abuse in relationships, I consider cutting someone off to be an extreme as a measure though. I don't do it everyday.
my childhood friend was LSI who I had to cut off for almost exactly the same reasons and under similar circumstances. something about hamlet and maxims orientation to one another just makes them really hard for other people to deal with I think because they're so extreme. like my friend would drunkenly call me up and say fuck you because I wasnt paying him enough attention. he assumed that since chance had brought us together in grade school I was somehow responsible for him and he had a right to feel entitled and therefore indignant if I wasnt taking care of his needs, and his solutions were typical Se creative type stuff. but he couldnt just have a normal Fi conversation about it
I sometimes create drama to get what I want but never drama for the sake of drama, it doesn't activate me or give me energy or happiness. Just a tool to get to the goal
I would love it if you could share an example of this, like a time you created drama in order to get something. Thanks
Well a small example can be when I was 4 years old my mother took me to a kindergarten where I didn't like the kids or any activities they did, I wanted to go out on my bike and play on the street and of course the teachers didn't let us go out. So 2 or 3 times a week I pretended I was sick, because that was almost the only weak point of my alpha mom, and I pretended I had terrible stomachache and cried and she let me stay home and then after a while I'd suddenly be ok and do the things I liked to do
Also, I used to lock myself in my room when my father mentioned that every woman must get married at a point, or women must do this and must do that. Once he said "you obey me until you get married" and I yelled at him I'll never forgive him for that. Obviously he's LSI
For someone I like not to leave me, I become a bit dramatic. Call every day write long text messages stalk their social media etc.
An important behaviour I have is when an institution or someone related to my work has been unfair to me, I spread the news to everyone to let them know about the unfair source, and when transferring the information I exaggerate a bit to make sure people understand the depth of this unfairness also to gather followers and supporters for myself. For example a few months ago I had to get some work done at a foreign embassy and the manager of this work had made a huge mistake, for which not only the embassy did not apologize, but also they wasted my time by saying the problem will be fixed today, then calling me to embassy again and after standing in line figuring out it will be fixed in minimum 2 weeks, and then fixing it in a month without calling and informing it was fixed, and when I went out for a month I spoke about this unfairness and irresponsiblity to everyone. at those moments I feel it is my duty to inform others.
And once I had an interview at 8, I was there 7:45 and the interviewer himself arrived in office at 8:15 and then had told the secretary to tell me I am late. I got very angry and started yelling, again trying to gather supporters for myself and against the opponent (!) and yes they apologized and let me in.
You sound like the kind of guy who I could do business with.
LIEs are why Viagra was invented. The rest of the world just couldn't keep up.
Hmm you mean the type of woman you could do business with (;
Would be good to have someone better at the drama stage
"Maybe if i were a rich ESI he wouldn't cut me out, ha! (j/k)" you seemed to believe it partly from my perspective. a small part of you. etc
I agree that HAs are explained rather simplistically like a lot of Socionics theory but there's an (information?) element of truth in them. For example, ESTps frequently seem to have afterthoughts that maybe they should have considered others before doing whatever they did - when maybe they've been somewhat impetuous. Such thoughts are usually easily shrugged off but there's often an accumulation of doubt. However, when they are praised by others for whatever they're doing, the accumulations are somewhat assuaged but they don't want love any more than any other type - however, they may like being loved that incremental tad more because of the detached way they often conduct themselves.....
a.k.a. I/O
Ok yes, but this is like saying there’s a piece of still edible corn in a big pile of shit lolI agree that HAs are explained rather simplistically like a lot of Socionics theory but there's an (information?) element of truth in them. For example, ESTps frequently seem to have afterthoughts that maybe they should have considered others before doing whatever they did - when maybe they've been somewhat impetuous. Such thoughts are usually easily shrugged off but there's often an accumulation of doubt. However, when they are praised by others for whatever they're doing, the accumulations are somewhat assuaged but they don't want love any more than any other type - however, they may like being loved that incremental tad more because of the detached way they often conduct themselves.....
a.k.a. I/O
[Today 07:57 AM] Raver: Life is a ride that lasts very long, but still a ride. It is a dream that we have yet to awaken from.
It's hard to find a love through every shade of grey.
I have denied that is the case twice already. Now if u think u know what im thinking or feeling better than i do then good luck to you i don't wish to comment further.
Seeing my type change, he probably didn't like something about you. Often it is superficial.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phrenology
An optimist - does not get discouraged under any circumstances. Life upheavals and stressful events only toughen him and make more confident. He likes to laugh and entertain people. Enters contact with someone by involving him with a humorous remark. His humor is often sly and contain hints and double meanings. Easily enters into arguments and bets, especially if he is challenged. When arguing his points is often ironic, ridicules the views of his opponent. His irritability and hot temper may be unpleasant to others. However, he himself is not perceptive of this and believes that he is simply exchanging opinions.
http://www.wikisocion.net/en/index.php?title=LIE_Profile_by_Gulenko
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