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Thread: Feeling like your beneficiary when self-esteem is high and your benefactor when its low?

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    Muddy's Avatar
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    Default Feeling like your beneficiary when self-esteem is high and your benefactor when its low?

    I just going to assume I'm LII for the sake of this thread since that currently makes the most sense.


    I've noticed that I often feel like an ISTp when I feel satisfied and in control of my life, and an IEI when I'm not. A lot of the things that can be used to describe ISTps describe me when I feel good about myself: Independent, relaxed, harmonized with physical surroundings, a "badass lone wolf". The same can be said about feeling like an IEI when I feel bad about myself. I feel weak, needy, naive, dreamy and out of touch with reality when in the dumps.

    My question is, can any other types here relate? Do IEIs feel like ESIs in their low points and LIIs when confident in themselves? SEI to ILI for LSIs? IEE to SLE for LIE? SEE to ILE for LSE?

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    killer wolf lemontrees's Avatar
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    um... no

    i can see similarities w/ both those types but not in proportion to self-esteem

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    Quote Originally Posted by lemontrees View Post
    um... no

    i can see similarities w/ both those types but not in proportion to self-esteem
    .....

    I think it is well known that the HA plays a large role in self-esteem so that may play a part. However, I only feel like SLI when my self-esteem is high and not SEI. In my observations people often seem satisfied with themselves when they successfully exhibit the traits of their benefactor, and bad about themselves when they act too much like the benefactors. For example, EII often gets smug when they manage to care for people's physical well-being like an SEI, and feel regret when they become too cold and critical like an ILI. Same seems to be true on the opposite end of the spectrum with SLE. They feel good about themselves when they positively contribute to the group atmosphere like an ESE, and bad when people accuse them of being manipulative like LIE.

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    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Hum would I feel like an SEI or ILI? Is that what you are asking? I think that I would say no. Neither tend to suffer from depression necessarily. When I feel bad I feel like a crouching tiger hidden Dragon lol

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    strangeling's Avatar
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    I can relate with feeling unusually satisfied when I'm in sync with other people's emotional levels; it ends up feeling like my emotional values are accepted, understood, and respected. But when I'm not, I can feel very dark and unrelated to the idea of being human, like I'm trying to walk across a thousand hands in a field that are all reaching to grab and break my ankles, just so I can become one of them, so they can drag me into the dirt and make my hands a part of their sadistic existence. It can make me very sad, yet very angry, to the point that I'll dissociate the pain and replace it with anger and become some kind of beast or devil or monster. To me they all feel the same.

    As far as being like your benefactor, it is supposed to be an area of neurosis, so I could see it being negative. But neurosis can give people the potential to become more self-aware and better handle or adapt to reality, so it's probably also a very positive thing as well.

    So I don't know, but they are both negative and positive for me.

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    What you're describing is the fact that your beneficiary Ego rests such that it goes from Ignoring to Mobilizing within your unconscious superblock; that is, going from malaise to higher energy state. It is elation. Your benefactor Ego on the other hand goes from Suggestive to Demonstrative within your unconscious Superblock; that is, from being attracted by your surroundings to malaise. It is descention.

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    Haikus
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    You're just buying into bad stereotypes about IEIs I think more than anything.

    Anyways, I feel physically stronger than INTjs despite being the feeler type and such an obvious weak "magical class lol emo poetry boy" type. I have never really felt physically threatened by intjs at all, the Se polr is painfully obvious in them - and se dual seeking trumps se polr. This is evident when my intj dad hit me 27 times trying to be serious and it felt like a kitten pouncing on me.

    But my relationships with LIIs are almost always so good cuz I give them that Fe they like so much, and I like how they are often times nerdy/weaker/more adorable than even me.

    (Okay so I returned ur stereotyping of IEI with stereotypes of my own but ....)

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    Muddy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    You're just buying into bad stereotypes about IEIs I think more than anything.
    Whether or not they are stereotypes is irrelevant because I'm only talking about the "image" of SLI and IEI without regards to what they actually do. Its not that I think bad of IEIs themselves, its that I wouldn't want to be accused of acting like one. I'd take it as a compliment if someone said I was acting like an SLI even if the person saying it intended in a bad way e.g. "You are lazy and self-centered." Yes bitch I am lazy and self-centered, deal with it. But if someone told me I was acting in a stereotypical IEI-ish manner e.g "Your so delicate and imaginative", I'd take it negatively even if it was intended in a positive way. I hate being seen as someone who is weak and removed from reality regardless of whether or not people would like me to be that way of not. Flipping over to ESI who has IEI as beneficiary and SLI as benefactor would probably have the opposite reaction. Since they probably often get accused of being harsh and unimaginative, they would probably take the statement about being delicate and imaginative positively. But since selflessness and hard work is the very core of what they hold dear, they would probably react very negatively to being called lazy and self-centered. I know I may be generalizing, so if I can get any feedback from ESIs here about the above it would be appreciated.
    Last edited by Muddy; 12-10-2015 at 06:54 AM.

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    self-esteem is higher when superid functions are active. lower - when superid
    Types examples: video bloggers, actors

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    But if someone told me I was acting in a stereotypical IEI-ish manner e.g "Your so delicate and imaginative", I'd take it negatively even if it was intended in a positive way.
    Well there's your problem. I think the root core of your issue is being comfortable with your own delicate/imaginative-ness. Ie fagginess. <grin>

    Because right now it sounds like you are upset and on verge of bullying others, and getting hateful people to pat you on the back to support your own prejudices. That's not the way to go man. Don't use socionics to support that hateful shit. Just accept your own gayness already.

    Since they probably often get accused of being harsh and unimaginative, they would probably take the statement about being delicate and imaginative positively. But since selflessness and hard work is the very core of what they hold dear, they would probably react very negatively to being called lazy and self-centered.


    You make too many assumptions, and are living in your head. You're also using rationality and logic poorly to support what is an emotional issue. You are also just wrong, harsh people really don't like being perceived as weak either - that makes no sense. But beating up and psychologically tearing into a dainty target to feel better about your own delicateness isn't really the way to go, and I do sense you are on the verge of that. It's not like criticizing somebody else's delicateness makes you any tougher. Plz don't pull an absurd.

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    although I gotta say 'Delicate Delusional Degenerate Dicksucker' is a good insult... I give permission for ppl to call me that if they are pissed when I'm trolling as revenge.

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