Member Questionnaire 1 (summerprincess)
What is beauty? What is love?
Beauty is physical appearance and how in tune with the 'golden ratio' your features are. Beauty is somewhat in the eye of the beholder but there are some universal standards in play as well. I've never really experienced love but I think it's devotion; feeling you would give your all for someone. Basically knowing them in their weaknesses and caring for them anyway.
What are your most important values?
I don't have a lot of values that are really set in stone..I'd say that keeping an open mind is generally important though. It's also important to try to understand various points of view and perspectives and try to see where people are coming from. Lots of people make the mistake of thinking that everyone else has the same mind as them but if everyone had the same mind, we wouldn't all have differing opinions!! I don't always understand why someone would feel differently than me but in order to be a peaceful and just society, we have to at least attempt to understand. I also am anti-porn to an extent, not because of the sex per se but because of the industry and its abusive qualities. I try to be a feminist as well but I'm kind of bad at it because I'm very feminine and I kind of look down upon lots of women, either because they're more masculine or because of jealousy... it's hard to admit this but it's true...but I'm working on it. I'm not sure really what my views are sometimes! Hmm.. I think it's bad to judge people before you know the facts, and it's crucial to always remember that everyone feels emotions differently and has their own reasons behind their actions. Oh, also I am very pro-Palestine. I'd like to volunteer there eventually.
Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
I don't right now, but I'm always searching for a religion that fits me. Unfortunately it looks like I'm not committed enough to bother fully with one, and I don't believe much in God anyway though I try to believe, but it just doesn't make sense to me. I like learning about religions and I find the symbolism behind mythology to be interesting; I like learning about types of witchcraft too and I also like reading up on Islam, which I know a significant amount about for a non-muslim person, haha. I'm trying to learn to read tarot cards too. But honestly since age 9-10 I've been looking up religions to see which one I should become, dabbling in lots of stuff (mostly just reading) and I've found nothing that really resonates with me.
Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?
I dislike the US military, I dislike war in general and I don't even know why it's necessary. I do not 'support the troops', I don't care about patriotism and I have multiple reasons for this which I don't feel like going into because it'd warrant a lot of writing! But yeah. Power is influence; influencing people, getting everyone on your side (or at least the people who matter.) once you do that you can run the world.
What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?
I mostly just have long conversations about dating, shopping, small talk, and really vapid stuff but I guess it's what I enjoy talking about?! I do like to discuss languages because I'm super interested in them, sometimes politics/religion if it's not going to always turn into a debate or if the person is not an idiot. I like to gossip too, bad I know....Music is fun to discuss if you share bands/artists in common, as are books if those are shared.
Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
Not really. I am interested in psychology and psychological health, though. That's fun to talk about and I love trying to guess if someone may have a psychological problem and guess their personality type too. I more focus on my appearance, though I guess I'm kinda a hypochondriac sometimes. I'm scared of getting sick, dying, and related ailments. I'm focused on my body but just how it looks. I can get pretty obsessive about it actually like breakouts will make me cry, at times before I've refused to leave the house when I don't look 'right', and things like that.
What do you think of daily chores?
I hate doing chores with a passion
Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.
I like dark comedies, horror movies, erotic thrillers, kinda stupid teen comedies too. 90s movies also! For books I like to read mostly non-fiction and modern philosophy, and some art books..I like history too but usually told from unusual perspectives without just rote facts on a page. I loooved the Master & Margarita by Bulgakov, also A Tree Grows In Brooklyn; White Oleander. I like creepy stuff and Coming of age type literature.
What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?
I hate getting insulted and that has sometimes made me cry. Especially if someone hits a weak spot. Smile, hmm, sharing a glance with a friend, getting a compliment, making an achievement like getting into a program.
Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?
I like the nighttime so I feel like best when I'm out to eat at night, and also when I'm drunk at night at a party because that's the only time I really feel connected. I also like just sitting with friends relaxing, smoking hookah, that's a wonderful feeling. I like going to the ocean as well, that's where I feel more oneness with nature itself. Especially the ocean at night.
What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
I dislike most things about myself, I don't think most people could tell honestly. My weaknesses are laziness, no motivation, tendencies towards depression, low self-esteem, overly blunt or straightforward sometimes, but also tend to run away from certain situations rather than face them.
What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
Strengths are that I'm talkative, creative, reasonably stylish, good with figuring out good lighting and arrangements for rooms, I match colors and prints well, I'm pretty good with makeup (though every time putting it on can be a learning experience lol!), I'm a very fast reader too.
In what areas of your life would you like help?
Being less awkward! Also I need motivation! And I need too be able not to doubt myself so much.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Yes all the time, I feel like I'm not good enough to go after what I want, and even if I felt like I was good enough, I barely know what I want in the first place.
What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I like both quiet and outgoing types, for dating I've always preferred outgoing guys I don't know why, I guess with quieter guys I become the loud pushy leading type, making a lot of noise and being all dramatic, which I do maybe to compensate for their lack of ...macho-ness? Lol. Not sure. A quiet guy would probably be better for me! But I gravitate towards the charming, funny-yet-still-can-be-serious type. Usually this type exudes this masculine, sexual energy I crave too. For friends I get along with most people well enough, some think I can be a bitch. I don't have a lot of close friends. People who like me say I'm funny/friendly. I don't like when people tease me too much even if it's with a good heart; not being taken seriously just gets to me.
How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?
^^^^^^^ Above
If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
I don't think I want children but if I had them, I would read up so much on it beforehand!! I would get so excited and if I had the money buy a bunch of stuff to prepare. It would be integral to make sure I consumed the right foods during the pregnancy, probably get off my antidepressants, make sure that I'm calm all the time so there are no stressors for the baby. I'd definitely need a very caring husband to help me out. I would want the baby to grow up in a loving household and to develop a backbone and healthy self-esteem from an early age. The child would not be pressured into doing activities he/she would dislike but I would stress trying things out and being open to possibilities. I would also probably want the child raised in a vegetarian household and also a semi religious household, so I would try to take the child to one type of service each week, I guess whichever my husband & I decided on when we married (hypothetically lol)
A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
Disagree with them, but not aggressively, just state my own opinion. Of course sometimes the friend might say something I disagree with but there's no point in contesting it and in that case I just stay quiet or change the topic
Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
We're all part and parcel of society. I am a part of the whole and I don't do enough for it because I'm self-centered. I don't trust most people but individuals are generally better than groups; not a huge fan of groupthink. One social problem: lack of good grocery stores in poor urban South Side Chicago. There are many reasons for this but basically minorites constitute an underclass of sorts there. This is definitely something to be fixed and it's a deeply set social and political issue that can't be made right by sending tons of people to jail or getting one person off drugs.
How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
I don't know how I choose them they just kind of happened? I am pretty loud and talkative around them and usually get bored relatively quickly.
How do you behave around strangers?
In the same manner but probably more guarded. However I get in moods sometimes where I hate the world and just don't want to talk to anybody. I am more shy around strangers too I guess, but I don't mind talking to them.