Member Questionnaire 1 (RME83)
What is beauty? What is love? Beauty is when I can do nothing else but "stop" (thinking, perceiving, sensing, feeling) and appreciate living. It can be form, function, symmetry, subtlety, or harmony. It can be personal or impersonal, joyous or mysterious, calming or intoxicating, purposeful or random. Love is the internalization of admiration, appreciation, meaning, and value being combined in a way that makes it feel natural to be effortlessly selfless while purposefully subservient to the recipient. Both love and beauty are linked - we love beautiful things/values/people. We think those whom we love are beautiful, our parents/friends/spouses/places.
What are your most important values? To do well, be good, and love others. I value being a good father and a person who uplifts humanity in whatever ways I'm capable. I value possessions if they are correlated to experiential meanings - a gift from a loved one, a token of rememberance, or a reminder of something lost. I value excellence and excellent effort. I value life.
Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place? Yes. I grew up as a “devout atheist” – more like a smug anti-theist. I was generally a nightmare to contend with on topics involving spirituality/theism/immaterialism and have been the cause of many faithful believers to renounce their belief in God (I actually regret that). I have had a legitimate spiritual encounters which I fully am aware is subjective and can never be philosophically/logically reasoned to anyone else. Suffice it to say, I know that I know that there is more than mechanistic materialism/humanism/naturalism and do hold firm personal beliefs on the nature/philosophy/reality of deity/god. I never proselytize or evangelize any of my beliefs – they are beliefs and are naturally subjective. However, I have realized how fruitless the debates (resident in intellectual understandings of mind) are for any sort of extrapersonal spiritual understanding. Truly, one must have had a spiritual experience to understand one and cannot comprehend that level of reality without one. I have read in totality the religious books (scriptures) of the major world religions and find them fascinating. Generally, they all possess flawed understandings resulting from innate finite understanding limitations of the infinite. However one chooses to live – by dogma, theology, or culture – I have no opinion. I only discuss these topics with others as a goal of causing self reflection and evaluation hoping that others will realize a level of selfless humility caused by knowing that we don’t really know anything.
Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you? War: ridiculous that it's still necessary, awful in every way, and will become as ancient as the historical sociocultural/psychosocial tribal mentality from whence it was glorified - as humanity progresses toward a more unified altruistic brotherhood once fundamental, ideological groups/religions are eventually fall victim to the Age of Enlightenment and Internet access.
Militaries: Fear based, but necessary, institutions draining a massive amount of worldwide EDP. Necessary because various cultures place various definitions/values upon others while being led by psycholocally unstable individuals or oligarchies. There remains much evolutionary drive to conquer and subjugate others and militaries attempt to protect against their group's annihilation. Military members: not appreciative or unappreciative, I respect their dedication and courage but not the actions by which they sometimes must commit.
Power: the ability to influence with wisdom over strength, to wield the tools to rally others in a noble pursuit, to have courage, to have excellence in craft, to be able to cause change simply through will.
What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why? Anything really. Long conversations about anything philosophy, health/nutrition, environmental issues,religion,political, scientific, sexual, or comedic. I value long and interesting conversations with highly intelligent people because it seems that the qualified pool of conversationalists in those topics with said traits is minute. The more you're educated in those topics and the higher degree of one's intelligence level causes a certain understanding of how little we truly know. So many folks believe 'experts' and 'scientists' while not even realizing that all their beliefs are predicated upon conjecture, presuppositions, inferences, and are unfalsifiable (not subject to the scientific method).
Why? I suppose it's just an existential drive to discover meaning.
Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body? Very. Very. I'm a former bodybuilder, current powerlifter, Former semi-pro BMX bike racer, and current scratch golfer. I play basketball, tennis, and love to hike. My body is in shape and muscular. I grew up very skinny, saw myself in the mirror my freshman year of college as rail thin and decided enough. I changed diet, routine, and priorities immediately along with extensively educating myself and put on 60 lbs of lean muscle the first 18 months.
What do you think of daily chores? I abhor them. I hate routine and monotonous actions. I do them though. I don't really care about my surroundings as much as most - as long as it's not invasive to my feelings or thoughts. I like it when all the chores are done and that is my only motivation - I like things organized and neat but sometimes do other things instead of cleaning when I should.
Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome. Love all sorts of films. Divergent, Transcendance, interstellar, LoTR, and the Matrix are some of my favorites. I read mainly philosophy, spiritual, and psychology books.
What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why? I rarely cry, unless I get in an infrequent heightened emotional state. Sometimes feelings just build up and can't be repressed any longer and then little things make my eyes sweat. I cried when my first pet died in my arms, when my two daughters were born, when I've been the recipient of underserved love.
Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging? Hard question. I feel like I'm one with humanity - a meta-consciousness connection... The interconnectedness and interrelatedness of all of us sharing this holographic reality - perceiving and impacting each other continuously. I don't feel at home or I belong in any "place" or "group".
What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself? Weaknesses described by others: bluntness, aggressiveness, tactlessness, lack of empathy or compassion.
Myself: I wish I was better at not making people feel those ways about me.
What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself? Strengths by others (close people): humor, assertiveness, courage, intensity, skill, intelligence, articulation ability, philosophy, strength, integrity.
Myself: confidence, ability, determination, strength, body, humor, and charisma.
In what areas of your life would you like help? The ability to slow down. To appreciate little things. To just be present in time without qualification. To be a better husband. To be able to let others lead or guide me. To be able to trust easier. To be able to see people for who they are prior to judgment.
Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it. Rut? Not really. I'll just do something else or focus my attention on getting out. Never stuck.
What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with? Like: competence and capability. Honesty and sincerity. Intelligence and effort. Humor and intensity.
Dislike: irrational emotional expressions, inability to function appropriately, mean spiritedness, liars, selfish manipulators.
How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner? Romance is somewhat strange because it always seems so forced. Sex is awesome and I love it in every way. I love to play around and I love to please my partner. I'm not afraid of it and I'm good at it.
Partner: not shy, not afraid, not self conscious, in shape, flexible, vocal, intense.
If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why? My main concerns are for my two daughters emotional well being and that I instill in them a thirst for education and the ability to critically think. I also teach them self defense. Nothing gets in my way here, nor will I allow it to ever.
A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction? Inward: Should I correct him or will it take too long and/or be fruitless. Can he really handle being corrected without defensive mechanisms. Do I want to?
Outward: why do you believe that?
Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one. Society: irreparably broken and disheartening in every way. The common opinions are forged via indoctrination and then the majority of said opinions are then used to empower governments to repeat the cycle ad infinitim. I don't view myself as a "member" but rather as an outsider - a revolutionary with the ideas already formulated to fix government and to dismember self imposed social barriers causing division and animosity amongst social groups within a society.
Social problem: racism, education, taxation, sexualization of children, glorification of idiocy, worship of sports, etc etc etc etc.
How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them? Don't really choose friends, those relationships are natural and share a sort of chemistry or specific interest. I behave as myself, the more I trust them the more I open up to them.
How do you behave around strangers? Always polite and cordial. Somewhat cautious and am aware of their ability to harm me or my family. Somewhat suspicious and am inquisitive regarding their intentions. Never really hold conversations with strangers because I don't want to and I don't really care to want to know them.