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Thread: Success and Buying Into the Dominant Ideology

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    ouronis's Avatar
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    Default Success and Buying Into the Dominant Ideology

    I keep having this feeling that until I allow myself, to slip, to buy into the dominant ideology(which is not something I can list off for you, just notice by the friction I feel with most things), that I will not be successful, because that is the only time I will really allow myself to enjoy myself without the grass is greener syndrome. This is baseless and I call it a feeling because when I put these thoughts next to each other in a chain, I get a warm feeling in my stomach lol. But I want some opinions on this. Do you understand this, and what are your thoughts on this?

    It seems like every time I see a successful person, they are acting in the capacity of Keeper of the Flame, that is, being someone who has melded with the world so successfully that they "become" it and are rewarded for it. These people at first, buy into the ideology and become a slave to it(happily), then they are able to define it because of the positions they reach.

    Now, what I don't get is if this happens for everyone who is mildly successful. I buy into some parts of the ideology tacitly...mostly out of familiarity. But its this acceptance of the new that I lack. People "in the know", "in the new," are the successful ones. I wonder how to wrangle in what the new is, and if having skills that make you successful is more a bit of luck than anything(meaning you are lucky that you actually enjoy those things). I don't know. I'm confused.

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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    My general feeling is that approaching life in a way that acts to improve you into a better person and does good for society (and not harm) is a fairly foolproof way of becoming successful.

    i dont think its necessary to buy into the mainstream ideology to accomplish this, necessarily. Sometimes you have to grit your teeth and deal with it though, on the way (if it goes against your principles), or you can try to change things along the way as well, or lead by example. Some people will respect you more for it. (and some people will hate you for it, but so what? cant please everyone)

    I often have to fight my own tendency to sloth and be lazy, to try to grow and improve myself into a better person. We all have temptations that work against that general goal. It can be a struggle to fight off those temptations, but doing the right thing often is. Overcoming struggle is also a part of success.
    Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx

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    I am well aware that LII cannot really be helped, but I'm saying this anyway.... You have to clarify what is your understanding of success first. You see, success is not always success. You will not find happiness if you try to achieve what other people find a mark of success. You have to define your own standards for success and failure.

    If you mean, by the dominant ideology, buying into the frame that being successful has something to do with fame, wealth and social status... Then you have to ask, if fame, wealth and social status will really make you fulfilled. For me the answer is a clear no, so I just ignore the dominant ideology and go for what I consider a success.

    Melding with the world, I don't have anything against that. Actually, you will probably not have the energy to succeed in any major way unless you let go of selfish ambitions. I believe the driving energy for success comes from the fact that others value what you do for them. Benefit the world and the world will shower you with gratitude.

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    The key to success is to balance your own self-interests with compassion and empathy for others, never losing your poise and shifting in the direction of a codependent people pleaser or a cruel & sadistic douchebag. These two unhealthy types of people are attracted to one another in a tangled soap opera that goes nowhere, while a truly successful person rises beyond the dichotomy. It doesn't matter so much what you do, keep trying to improve what you want to be skillful at- but feelings of hatred and/or intense self-inferiority is the psychological roadblock for most people.

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    I personally enjoy playing the role of underdog/rebel. I find it much more satisfying to obtain some sort of position of power to overcome sadist and narcissist rather then obtaining dominance to stomp on a bunch of nobodies. My ideology- Do everything you can to undermine the cancers in this world and show benevolence to everyone else.

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    Honestly, you can buy some cool clothes for like 900 $ and rent a Ferrari for one Saturday for like 250 $ and have a drive in the cool neighbordhood of town that´s how many people look "successful".
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    10 months on, I have found a temporary niche in this process, by my reckoning. It involves being complaisant and smart. Not a success without the dominant ideology by any measure. I've given up on that hope.

    I don't envy success for what the Keeper of the Flame people do with success, I envy it for what I could do with it.
    salmon

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    My impression is that you're supposed to be able to work out how the ideology fits within your larger framework in a way that you can coexist with it. People that are successful know the basic idea and much more.

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