Male ESFj vs ESTp / ESE vs SLE men

[epheme]

I'm trying (unsuccessfully) to type some one and the things I'm sure about are: extroverted, sensor, merry and declaring. This leaves ESE or SLE.

Both types seem to not quite fit though.

He seems too nice and cuddly and such to be SLE. (Bad stereotype, perhaps?)
He seems generally to have beta > alpha values, and is unlike the ESEs I know. (Point two is not really a very good point, I know.)

I had him take an enneagram test and he tied between E2 & E7.

E2 points more to ESE.
E7 points more toward, well, either.
Personally, he seems more like a 6 to me.

Any advice on how to distinguish this gentleman's sociotype? Deciding factors between ESE & SLE?

[Pookie]

SLEs are really soft as baby shit.

When the dude smiles is it more like shit-eating smirk(SLE), or annoying perma-smile(ESE)?

[epheme]

SLEs are really soft as baby shit.

When the dude smiles is it more like shit-eating smirk(SLE), or annoying perma-smile(ESE)?

Lol, more like option 1, or occasionally a "look at the puppy!" smile. <----this is what I mean about the nice cuddly thing.

[suedehead]

I view Fe in ExE's as more nuanced or deliberate, and it can sometimes feel like emotional pressure. Whereas Fe-HA can be more of the giddy, childlike sort-of Fe that needs more mirroring in the moment or something.

[Iris]

"Decisive, authoritative, and commanding: the natural leader others look up to. Take initiative, make things happen: champion people, provider, protective, and honorable, carrying others with their strength."

This description of a healthy 8 describes my 2 SLE-Ti friends. The word commanding in the description is situationally accurate. They are not commanding all of the time. And they dont have to be. The people in their orbit don't always need to be commanded. One of them could possibly be mistaken for a 2. The other could possibly be mistaken for a 6. They are mostly quiet, even tempered and very nice to be around.

My SLE-Se friend is not as healthy. The persona she cultivates is that of an outgoing funny friendly person. But she can change to harsh and demanding in a heartbeat, a huge contrast to the friendly persona. If you dont cross her, you will probably never see the harsh side. She can also be dismissive of your needs and of social niceties if it suits her. She could be mistaken for a 7.

I think what distinguishes them as 8s, is that underneath their various veneers, at the most basic level, they need to be in control.

[The Ineffable]

One of the differences I can currently tell between these two male types from my interations is that SLEs don't understand some limits should not be crossed, in order to avoid pissing someone off. And what I mean by that, I am not a private person, just basically any SLE I know asks too many questions sometimes, they quickly go to "when", "where" and "how much"? While obviously, you answer only if you want to, there is no option they give to you to avoid an answer other than breaking it to them you just don't want to provide it to them - at least that is the only way I can find. They have no problem with direct opposition, they don't take it personally, just it's not that polite, IMO.

The SLE is direct - you are free to do what you want, in the end, it is not their responsibility for your decisions. ESEs are tactful, careful to how you feel, they don't want to intrude and spoil your openness, the most important thing in their interaction with people. Also, ESE males are among the most chivalrous towards women of them all, overall, in my opinion more so than SEI and EIE, and more genuine than LSI. SLEs tend to be quite sloppy in this respect, though they don't hide their thoughts, and when they really believe women are our golden treasure, they can be quite poetic.

Visually, SLEs are chill (unless you tell a false general fact[*]), now here's how an ESE (also EIE) looks like then they tell "serious" shit of theirs:


ESE males are more likely than SLE to remember the birthdays of more people than the closest ones.
---
[*] - by "general fact" I mean something that not just occurred to you or someone you know, but which blatantly contradicts their or the common knowledge.

[Iris]

SLE




ESE

[The Ineffable]

Nope. The latter definitely looks - and I think O'Reilly is - LSE, not ESE.