Ok...how do you tell the difference between these two? Especially in women?

I made my wife check the smilex's charts and she ended up being absolutely result oriented, absolutely positive, somewhere in the middle of narrative and taciturn, somewhere in the middle of democracy and aristocrat. Anyways we thought she is probably narrator and even though she doesn't believe a "committee" can bring about optimal decisions perhaps she is a democrat anyways. That would make her ENTj or ESFj.

Now we went on to see the Ni vs Si and Te vs Fe stuff.

Ni: CAREFREE, RESOLUTE, VICTIMIZED & STRATEGIC
Si: CALCULATING, JUDICIOUSNESS, TACTICAL & CAREFUL
-> She is absolutely strategic, absolutely resolute, pretty carefree, but doesn't feel too victimized. This would suggest Ni over Si. She doesn't feel tactical AT ALL.

Te: COMPLIANCE, GRAVE & EMOTION-CREATING are maximal at Te.
Fe: OBSTINACY, CHEERFUL & CONSTRUCT-CREATING are maximal at Fe.
-> She feels sort of compliant, a bit grave rather than cheerful, and more emotion-creating than construct-creating (though last one was hard to understand). This would suggest Te over Fe.

And in almost all other smilex's rules for Ni and Si, Te and Fe she chose Ni and Te.

So are the smilex's charts wrong/faulty or is my wife an ENTj and how do I know? Anyways she doesn't feel like she has a bad understanding of aesthetics so we haven't really considered PoLR so far. But who knows.