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Thread: How do you get out of work social events without looking like a dick?

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    xerx's Avatar
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    Default How do you get out of work social events without looking like a dick?

    ..?
    It was in the reign of George III that the aforesaid personages lived and quarrelled; good or bad, handsome or ugly, rich or poor, they are all equal now.

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    Olly From Wally World's Avatar
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    What kind of social events? They asking you if you want to go drinking after work or something?

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    The Soul Happy-er JWC3's Avatar
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    Scapegoat. My roommate in Chicago used to use me to get out of everything. She would just tell people I had the flu or stomach problems and didn't feel comfortable leaving me alone, if you don't have an RM just use some imaginary gerbil that will shit all over everything unless you are there to nurse it back to health. That's more of a one-off strategy though. Not to sure how to avoid continual work obligations like meeting the "guys" every Wednesday for cards or something. That's a lot trickier.
    Easy Day

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    Say that you already have other plans, or that you're not feeling well. From what I can recall, my co-workers have always been understanding with this - or they just didn't care whether one person skipped out on an appearance.

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    just opt out, no excuses, just do it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    just opt out, no excuses, just do it.
    +1

    Just don't go.

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    Haikus Persephone's Avatar
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    I usually say that I'd love to but have other plans/priorities which is absolutely true.
    I do not even lie or seek for a false excuse because it's none of others' business.
    I go out with my colleagues once a while though, just because I feel like and I do enjoy spending a bit of casual time with them.
    Do what you feel like

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    xerx's Avatar
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    I already know how to not go without providing excuses. That answer is the exact opposite of what the thread was asking -- i.e. not looking a dick.
    It was in the reign of George III that the aforesaid personages lived and quarrelled; good or bad, handsome or ugly, rich or poor, they are all equal now.

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    Haikus Persephone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by xerx View Post
    I already know how to not go without providing excuses. That answer is the exact opposite of what the thread was asking -- i.e. not looking a dick.
    You make a sweet face and you say that you'd love to but you have already got other plans.
    And you go out with them seldomly to cloud it all

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    find a demanding girlfriend and make her phone you incessantly after 6 PM.

    pay a friend to act as a demanding girlfriend making him phone you incessantly after 6 PM.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by Persephone View Post
    You make a sweet face and you say that you'd love to but you have already got other plans.
    And you go out with them seldomly to cloud it all
    that kind of strategy only works if you're a woman.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Haikus Persephone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    that kind of strategy only works if you're a woman.
    Nan, it works for everybody.
    Even for a colleague who I think is LSE (not even gay ), he never goes out and nobody thinks he is a dick.

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    fake your own death
    send a good body double
    burn the place down night before

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    I feel like people get it and maybe just keep asking you out to be polite or inclusive or something?

    (or maybe not)

    *feeling bad now b/c I keep asking this one acquaintance of mine to anything I put together just to be inclusive and he never shows up b/c he hates hanging w/ anyone other than his gf now that she's back in town but he does this shitty thing of always clicking 'maybe' on the invite- ugh. i should just stop.*

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    Quote Originally Posted by lemontrees View Post
    I feel like people get it and maybe just keep asking you out to be polite or inclusive or something?

    (or maybe not)

    *feeling bad now b/c I keep asking this one acquaintance of mine to anything I put together just to be inclusive and he never shows up b/c he hates hanging w/ anyone other than his gf now that she's back in town but he does this shitty thing of always clicking 'maybe' on the invite- ugh. i should just stop.*
    Maybe you should just follow up with him.

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    killer wolf lemontrees's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    Maybe you should just follow up with him.
    no. he's eii. it's just his fi causing him to do that.

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    I honestly wouldn't think twice about it. But then I don't have much job/career experience yet, and I guess it's useful to in certain cases.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ollyx2OxenFree View Post
    What kind of social events? They asking you if you want to go drinking after work or something?
    Drinking with co-workers is tricky. I know one way my friend gets out of it every time and earns respect at the same time. She tells them she has an AA meeting to attend first and she will talk to her sponsor about whether or not it is a good idea to hang in a bar. She says they never bother her about going out again. For some reason people think you really got it together if you go to meetings. I went to a couple NA/AA meetings before and everyone seemed stuck on their past and talking about how weak they are when it comes to drugs and alcohol. Then all the guys want to know how long you have been clean so they can determine if it is ok to hit on you. That is not the right kind of environment for someone who wants to forget all the crazy stuff they did while drunk. I avoid reminiscing about some of the fucked up stuff I have done while fucked up. As usual I have gone off on a tangent.

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    Hide in the toilets until everyone leaves.:-)

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    .
    Last edited by Chains; 09-05-2015 at 04:57 AM.

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