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Thread: Beta attraction

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    Default Beta attraction

    Okay let's suppose I am BETA NF (yay), whom am I supposed to be attracted to, appart BETA ST, of course?
    Why?

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    Why not describe your perfect mate? Then we can type him / her.

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    Quote Originally Posted by xerx View Post
    Why not describe your perfect mate? Then we can type him / her.
    Ehhhh I am a straight girl
    A bit shy to expose it like that

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    hmm. That narrows it down to sixteen types.

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    Should be an extravert anyway

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Should be an extravert anyway
    Why necessarily extroverts?
    I'm the same type as you, but all of my hmmm .... romantic interests ... have been introverts. I've never really been attracted to extroverts. Maybe I am an extrovert, after all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Okay let's suppose I am BETA NF (yay), whom am I supposed to be attracted to, appart BETA ST, of course?
    Why?
    Other Beta NFs, because they use the same functions as you, though the relationships may be non-starters due to victim-victim.
    If IEI, SEEs will give you that Se you seek, and the Fe/Fi use will not be painful for either of you. ILEs will give you Ti, and you can ignore each others primaries.
    If EIE, same principle. LIIs will give you the Ti you seek, and the Ne/Ni use will not be painful for either of you. ESIs will give you Se, and you can ignore each others primaries.

    Ideally, though, you want your dual.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Why necessarily extroverts?
    I'm the same type as you, but all of my hmmm .... romantic interests ... have been introverts. I've never really been attracted to extroverts. Maybe I am an extrovert, after all.
    I need people to get me out of my bubble.
    I am a responding type, all of my interests were extroverted because they were there to get me.
    Despite my advanced age, I've experienced only 2 serious relationships with an LSE (a disaster) and an IEE (if the typing is correct).
    For the rest, I do not remember

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    I need people to get me out of my bubble.
    I am a responding type, all of my interests were extroverted because they were there to get me.
    Despite my advanced age, I've experienced only 2 serious relationships with an LSE and an IEE (if the typing is correct).
    For the rest, I do not remember
    Blimey Charlie! An LSE?? That must have been hell. Are you sure you're IEI?
    My 2 relationships were with an LII-Ne (I believe) and another IEI.
    I'm a responding type too, but the first I met in college, and the second I met online. It was a case of mutual-responding. Extroverts have always seemed so out of reach, to me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Blimey Charlie! An LSE?? That must have been hell. Are you sure you're IEI?
    My 2 relationships were with an LII-Ne (I believe) and another IEI.
    It WAS hell But he was really really insisting.
    I am not sure (that's why I use let's suppose huh)

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    It WAS hell But he was really really insisting.
    I am not sure (that's why I use let's suppose huh)
    Te pushiness, huh?
    The first relationship for me was hell, but for non-cognitive reasons.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Te pushiness, huh?
    The first relationship for me was hell, but for non-cognitive reasons.
    College=before high school or college=university?
    For my first serious reationship, I am a late bloomer.
    We met each other when I was 18 but started to go out together when I was almost 20.
    I rejected him at the beginning and made him sweat pretty much actually
    I remember having a tea together with an actual boyfiend, my future boyfriend and someone who would like to be my boyfriend but never had a chance to

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    College=before high school or college=university?
    For my first serious reationship, I am a late bloomer.
    We met each other when I was 18 but started to go out together when I was almost 20.
    I rejected him at the beginning and made him sweat pretty much actually
    I remember having a tea together with an actual boyfiend, my future boyfriend and someone who whould like to be my boyfriend but never had a chance to
    Neither. College = between high school and not bothering with university.
    Mine were aged 17-18, and 18-19, respectively. I'm having a break
    You like them to do the chasing? That's quite normal for the "victim" romance style (couldn't they have called it something else?).
    Drinking tea sounds like an awful date.

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    I'm sorry, but what kind of question is this? You want other people to tell you who you are supposed to be attracted to?

    If you had a couple people in mind, and were wondering which you would be most compatible with depending on if you're looking for short-term or long-term, that would at least be related to a socionics forum.

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    Quote Originally Posted by blood moon View Post
    I'm sorry, but what kind of question is this? You want other people to tell you who you are supposed to be attracted to?

    If you had a couple people in mind, and were wondering which you would be most compatible with depending on if you're looking for short-term or long-term, that would at least be related to a socionics forum.
    I guess this the perfect time to withdraw and to eat shit as per your avatar picture.
    Executing immediately...

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    @LostInDreams
    I think you started this thread more to check you typing than anything, am I right? I mean, if you know what types IEIs are generally attracted to, you can make sense of it that way.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    @LostInDreams
    I think you started this thread more to check you typing than anything, am I right? I mean, if you know what types IEIs are generally attracted to, you can make sense of it that way.
    i read it as she was curious about what types she should be interested in.

    maybe esfp.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Te pushiness, huh?
    The first relationship for me was hell, but for non-cognitive reasons.
    Sometimes you just need a little Te_nder, loving care.

    “My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.”​ —C.G. Jung
     
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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Okay let's suppose I am BETA NF (yay), whom am I supposed to be attracted to, appart BETA ST, of course?
    Why?
    IEI, ILI, SLE

    because the manual says so?

    “My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.”​ —C.G. Jung
     
    YWIMW

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Ehhhh I am a straight girl
    A bit shy to expose it like that
    Bummer... to both.


    “My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.”​ —C.G. Jung
     
    YWIMW

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Okay let's suppose I am BETA NF (yay), whom am I supposed to be attracted to, appart BETA ST, of course?
    Why?
    Hey missy, what's with the eye-roll ? I'm the last one to give relationship advice and this will sound weird (not to mention against the theory), but I can somehow imagine you with LIE or LII

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    I love those duality descriptions. @William Thanks for posting those. The first time I read the EIE one and it talks about how the mentor can count on the inspector to help fulfill tasks, it made me cry. I have just gotten tired of the resistance, passivity or whatever, that I encounter from my non-beta friends. I get tired of having to make things happen by myself, or watching my visions go unfulfilled because I don't have what it takes.
    @LostInDreams I do think it is worth it to figure out what you were made to do and if you want a partner in life, then really try to find someone who will share your passions and you can help each other. If your role in life is to inspire, how sad would it be with someone who doesn't respond to your visions?
    You seek a great fortune, you three who are now in chains. You will find a fortune, though it will not be the one you seek.
    But first you must travel a long and difficult road, a road fraught with peril.
    You shall see things, wonderful to tell. You shall see a... cow... on the roof of a cotton house. And, oh, so many startlements.
    I cannot tell you how long this road shall be, but fear not the ob-stacles in your path, for fate has vouchsafed your reward.
    Though the road may wind, yea, your hearts grow weary, still shall ye follow them, even unto your salvation
    .


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pukq_XJmM-k

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aylen View Post
    IEI, ILI, SLE

    because the manual says so?
    Does it work like that for you, in practice?

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    Quote Originally Posted by William View Post
    Hey now, don't run off. It's good life advice to figure out who/what you want from a partner as separate from socionics, but it seems you're just looking for more of the theory/understanding of how the pairings interact and why there is the attraction. For that, it would be constructive in my opinion for you to check out the Duality Descriptions: http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...Meged-Ovcharov

    By reading that, you can get a sense from what people are looking for in their duals, and then apply that to functions and identify how you can be attracted to other types, besides your dual. For example, if you're Beta NF and want Ti & Se, then besides your own quadra, you can find two Alpha NTs who can provide healthy Ti and two Gamma SFs who can provide healthy Se.
    Alpha Ti and Gamma Se aren't healthy, they're inverse.


    A gross simplicification, is that Beta NF is looking for someone who can actuate them, quieten their mind and focus them into action.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iris View Post
    I love those duality descriptions. @William Thanks for posting those. The first time I read the EIE one and it talks about how the mentor can count on the inspector to help fulfill tasks, it made me cry. I have just gotten tired of the resistance, passivity or whatever, that I encounter from my non-beta friends. I get tired of having to make things happen by myself, or watching my visions go unfulfilled because I don't have what it takes.
    @LostInDreams I do think it is worth it to figure out what you were made to do and if you want a partner in life, then really try to find someone who will share your passions and you can help each other. If your role in life is to inspire, how sad would it be with someone who doesn't respond to your visions?
    ENFj's usually come across as drama queens. They need someone logical to make them less emotional, and more rational.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    @LostInDreams
    I think you started this thread more to check you typing than anything, am I right? I mean, if you know what types IEIs are generally attracted to, you can make sense of it that way.
    The margin of doubt is becoming narrower and narrower, unfortunately.

    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    i read it as she was curious about what types she should be interested in.

    maybe esfp.
    You read it right.
    I never really dwelled on people's type to explain the atraction principle though.
    Decided to change the perpective. AND MAY SOCIONICS ENLIGHTEN MY LIFE, AMEN.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aylen View Post
    IEI, ILI, SLE

    because the manual says so?
    Quote Originally Posted by Aylen View Post
    Bummer... to both.

    Ah maybe I should change and try something new?


    Quote Originally Posted by darya View Post
    Hey missy, what's with the eye-roll ? I'm the last one to give relationship advice and this will sound weird (not to mention against the theory), but I can somehow imagine you with LIE or LII
    I like to rebel against the theory and accept the challenge
    Need to find a supervisor somewhere in the jungle!

    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Neither. College = between high school and not bothering with university.
    Mine were aged 17-18, and 18-19, respectively. I'm having a break
    You like them to do the chasing? That's quite normal for the "victim" romance style (couldn't they have called it something else?).
    Drinking tea sounds like an awful date.
    It wasn't a programmed date, 2 of them showed up without invitation.
    I just thought it was fun to drink a bit of tea altogether
    I must be chased, I can be a prize

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iris View Post
    I love those duality descriptions. @William Thanks for posting those. The first time I read the EIE one and it talks about how the mentor can count on the inspector to help fulfill tasks, it made me cry. I have just gotten tired of the resistance, passivity or whatever, that I encounter from my non-beta friends. I get tired of having to make things happen by myself, or watching my visions go unfulfilled because I don't have what it takes.
    @LostInDreams I do think it is worth it to figure out what you were made to do and if you want a partner in life, then really try to find someone who will share your passions and you can help each other. If your role in life is to inspire, how sad would it be with someone who doesn't respond to your visions?
    Thanks @William, you are sweet. I appreciated your time and attention.


    I did not cry while reading hum hum but the decisiveness and initiative point are definitely things I would search in a partner.
    Iris, I sadly smiled while reading your last sentence.
    Curiously, I've always considered myself as an inspiration.

    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    Alpha Ti and Gamma Se aren't healthy, they're inverse.

    A gross simplicification, is that Beta NF is looking for someone who can actuate them, quieten their mind and focus them into action.
    THIS IS SO TRUE.

    Quote Originally Posted by mercutio View Post
    ENFj's usually come across as drama queens. They need someone logical to make them less emotional, and more rational.
    All women are drama queens, this is an extremely known fact

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    The margin of doubt is becoming narrower and narrower, unfortunately.
    What type were you hoping to be?

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    What type were you hoping to be?
    Does not matter anymore

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    LID u can be EIE. <3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Iris View Post
    I love those duality descriptions. @William Thanks for posting those. The first time I read the EIE one and it talks about how the mentor can count on the inspector to help fulfill tasks, it made me cry. I have just gotten tired of the resistance, passivity or whatever, that I encounter from my non-beta friends. I get tired of having to make things happen by myself, or watching my visions go unfulfilled because I don't have what it takes.
    @LostInDreams I do think it is worth it to figure out what you were made to do and if you want a partner in life, then really try to find someone who will share your passions and you can help each other. If your role in life is to inspire, how sad would it be with someone who doesn't respond to your visions?
    Interesting enough the same dynamic can be observed in the IEE/SLI duality.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Martrix View Post
    Does it work like that for you, in practice?
    I'll let you know when I'm done practicing.

    Edit: SLE/IEI duality description offends me.

    “My typology is . . . not in any sense to stick labels on people at first sight. It is not a physiognomy and not an anthropological system, but a critical psychology dealing with the organization and delimitation of psychic processes that can be shown to be typical.”​ —C.G. Jung
     
    YWIMW

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    Does not matter anymore
    I know, it's futile.

    Quote Originally Posted by Radio View Post
    LID u can be EIE. <3
    Then so can I!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aylen View Post
    I'll let you know when I'm done practicing.

    Edit: SLE/IEI duality description offends me.
    Yeah, it's saying we can't do anything ourselves.

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    in theory,

    semi-duality and mirage: both are relations between compatible temperaments and resemble duality in some ways

    activity and mirror: same quadra - shared values, activity is usually more attractive than mirror but mirror can also be very attractive given the right subtypes

    benefit: very common intertype for friendships and couples, beneficiaries and benefactors have the same style of thinking as one's dual and thus are evocative of them, furthermore it is often easier for them to meet each other than meeting their duals, for romance better if Fe/Ti or Fi/Te is shared

    extinguishment: same as with benefit ext. types have the same thinking style as one's dual, which is attractive, but opposing set of quadra values which is responsible for the quenching effect, typically these are casual friendships that don't go too deep and brief romances - most attractive intertype between opposing quadra

    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    I like to rebel against the theory and accept the challenge
    Need to find a supervisor somewhere in the jungle!
    now rebel away!

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    Apply socionics zen. First people were people, then they became types and after some time they become people again.

    So pretending socionics is everything: What types do you like the sound of and why?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Radio View Post
    LID u can be EIE. <3
    A pretty uptight EIE then
    This said, Meged was hesitating between EIE-Ni and ILE-Ti.

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    Quote Originally Posted by InvisibleJim View Post
    Apply socionics zen. First people were people, then they became types and after some time they become people again.

    So pretending socionics is everything: What types do you like the sound of and why?
    That's good I learnt about socionics later, otherwise I would have doomed my life.

    I am attracted to intelligence, strong will, initiative, action, boldness and steadiness at the same time
    I have no moderation and can be impulsive and irrational, I need to be moderated, controlled without being so and appeased as I tend to overanalyze things.
    Whatever the type can be

    Quote Originally Posted by William
    In the pants!!!
    It can be a good point but it does not come in the first place.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LostInDreams View Post
    I am attracted to intelligence, strong will, initiative, action, boldness and steadiness at the same time
    I have no moderation and can be impulsive and irrational, I need to be moderated, controlled without being so and appeased as I tend to overanalyze things.
    Whatever the type can be
    Could be SLE-Ti

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