Full Circle

[Eldanen]

So, I have perhaps come full circle and achieved the end of a road that for me has been one full of doubt and indecision about my type. It has always seemed to me that I could type anyone else with accuracy in person, while my own remained a mystery to me. At long last, after a serendipitous meeting with an ISTj, I have come to the ironic conclusion that I am an ENFj. What subtype, I have not yet decided. Maybe I'll figure that one out eventually as well.

It's ironic considering especially the things I've written about ENFjs, and how one supposedly supervised me. In reality, I've decided that person was actually an ENFp. But that tidbit is only important for those of you who have read that thread.

After meeting and connecting with the istj at the nightclub, I came away with a sense of absolute bliss, the kind that, when you're under the influence of, you can't help but pace around or scream in exultation. I have almost never felt truly happy before. On that night, I felt calm, relieved, and utterly at peace. I'm glad all that's finally resolved. That said, do I get any welcomes to the beta quadra?

[Iris]

Well hey, Identical. Welcome.

One of the reasons that I was doubtful about my type was the thought that my awesome, wonderful SEI sister-in-law could be my supervisor. It really complicated things for me til I realized that the factors at play in the relationship greatly affect whether Base/Polr supervision takes place.

[Eldanen]

Well hey, Identical. Welcome.

One of the reasons that I was doubtful about my type was the thought that my awesome, wonderful SEI sister-in-law could be my supervisor. It really complicated things for me til I realized that the factors at play in the relationship greatly affect whether Base/Polr supervision takes place.

I ran into supervision recently with an SEI. He managed to ruin my mood and make me feel suicidal within a matter of a few weeks. He totally hid information from me as well. I should have been smarter about that situation, but it happened. I have also been friends with SEIs before. It's just when they feel like being assholes, I'm easy game for them it seems.

I had a lot of issues reconciling all the differences between myself and the typing descriptions I saw for various types. All of them are combined in the EIE descriptions though, which pretty much are me in a nutshell.

It also comes to mind for me that problems that took me forever to fix on my own were issues that suddenly I figured out how to solve once in proximity to LSIs for a while.. I didn't even have to bring up the issues. They kind of just solved themselves. Solutions I never thought of suddenly entered my mind lol. It's really strange.

One of the most profound things that suggested that LSIs might be my duals is that I had a dream once about an LSI who was my boyfriend. I had never felt such a positive emotion before in my life... It was like I was high on some drug a thousand times stronger than MDMA. It was only recently that I felt a similar feeling with the guy at the club. That dream was so amazing that I determined to burn it into my mind forever, because I had never felt a love that strong that it took several minutes to fade away even after I woke up. I never really understood why my dreams thought LSIs should be my boyfriends. I figured my subconscious must be mistaken. Lol. I eventually came to the truth though . It just took a while.

I friended the guy from the club on Facebook. I'm not sure if he is interested in a relationship though, so maybe I need to start looking for this man from my dreams lol. We'll see. It's funny because I'm the type of guy who would usually never consider even thinking about a relationship, but then again I've never been around someone who made me feel that good before.

[Eldanen]

what was the LSI like?

The LSI was very nice and had a great sense of humor. We joked the whole night about everything. At one point he commented that it must be amateur night for the drag show, and that one woman had an operation so she didn't have anything left to tuck in. She also apparently got a discount operation in Mexico and rumor has it that her shit looks chewed up lol.

During our first meeting my interest was mostly physical. He's a male dancer at the gay nightclub who claims to be mostly straight. I told him we'd have to work on that 1% lol.

He wasn't working on the second night, just hanging out. I saw him in the hallway and decided to say hello. My instincts at this point were in some kind of calmly arrested state. We started talking, and at some point during the night he clapped his hand on my chest lightly and all the tension left my body. I felt really warm lol. We started flirting after he came over to me at the booth where myself and my friends for the night were sitting. You know, knees touching, me wearing his hat and such. It was a lot of conversation and getting to know one another. I got the distinct feeling that he was good with people, happy, strong, and respectful. We ended up dancing on the floor that night... Mostly grinding lol. At one point I jumped too far in the conversation and said that if we ever did anything, it wouldn't be a one night stand. He seemed hurt a bit and looked into the distance. I apologized and it seems like he forgot what I said. The night ended and I felt like I was in nirvana.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Bitch please.

I knew you were Beta @Eldanen when I talked to you on the phone years ago and we both gave each other positive energy. That doesn't really happen most of the time with people.

In fact here is a rough but accurate chart explaining my mood after talking to a person in each of the quadras:

Beta: Damn I feel energized.
Alpha: Aw, I'm content. But I'd rather feel power.
Gamma: That was constructive, but why did we both have to sort of hide things we didn't like about each other?
Delta: Why did I even bother?

[Eldanen]

Bitch please.

I knew you were Beta @Eldanen when I talked to you on the phone years ago and we both gave each other positive energy. That doesn't really happen most of the time with people.

In fact here is a rough but accurate chart explaining my mood after talking to a person in each of the quadras:

Beta: Damn I feel energized.
Alpha: Aw, I'm content. But I'd rather feel power.
Gamma: That was constructive, but why did we both have to sort of hide things we didn't like about each other?
Delta: Why did I even bother?

Yeah I've noticed the same thing. Interaction is really smooth with betas and happens automatically. With deltas, every single word that comes out of my mouth pisses them off lol. I have an enfp half-sister. This happened with her whenever she came to visit. But if you knew I was beta the entire time, why didn't you say anything? Lol. I remember you suggesting I might be infp at some point, but other than that.

Your chart is pretty accurate actually btw. Some delta guys are sexy though. One istp I know is fun to trade bjs with. I know he likes me and maybe wants something more, but I don't think I'm going to let that happen. He broke up with his gf recently, and according to him they had a sexless relationship. He says he is bi, but maybe he is gay. I know he cheated on her with me when they were together :x....

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

I don't know, I get shy/quiet around people and have trouble speaking my mind sometimes. You being beta just makes sense though, your post is very 'illuminating' like a light bulb being turned on or something.

And I think guys who've been with both genders are the hottest usually because they aren't letting their mind or identity stand in the way of pleasurable and enjoyable experiences. Men aren't having sex with 'gays' they're having sex with MEN. mmmm.

[Eldanen]

I don't know, I get shy/quiet around people and have trouble speaking my mind sometimes. You being beta just makes sense though, your post is very 'illuminating' like a light bulb being turned on or something.

And I think guys who've been with both genders are the hottest usually because they aren't letting their mind or identity stand in the way of pleasurable and enjoyable experiences. Men aren't having sex with 'gays' they're having sex with MEN. mmmm.

He is pretty damn sexy. Even more because he has that straight guy vibe with stubble and all. He's also a few years younger than I am which is cool too. He doesn't like buttsex though, so that's a no go. I asked him if it was because it's a butt and he said no. Lol.

But yeah, end of the typing road for me. All quandaries 99% resolved.

It's odd because I kind of have been mean to Ti dominants over the years. I wouldn't be surprised if this didn't work out. I really don't deserve it after ignoring them so much to begin with and screwing with them lol.... I don't believe in karma, but I wouldn't be surprised if the guy figured my character out and decided against me. Oh well. What happens happens I guess.

[golden]

I like this thread. I logged in to say that.

(Plus to comment on cum in another thread, but whatever.)

[Olduvai]

So, I have perhaps come full circle and achieved the end of a road that for me has been one full of doubt and indecision about my type. It has always seemed to me that I could type anyone else with accuracy in person, while my own remained a mystery to me. At long last, after a serendipitous meeting with an ISTj, I have come to the ironic conclusion that I am an ENFj. What subtype, I have not yet decided. Maybe I'll figure that one out eventually as well.

It's ironic considering especially the things I've written about ENFjs, and how one supposedly supervised me. In reality, I've decided that person was actually an ENFp. But that tidbit is only important for those of you who have read that thread.

After meeting and connecting with the istj at the nightclub, I came away with a sense of absolute bliss, the kind that, when you're under the influence of, you can't help but pace around or scream in exultation. I have almost never felt truly happy before. On that night, I felt calm, relieved, and utterly at peace. I'm glad all that's finally resolved. That said, do I get any welcomes to the beta quadra?

Describe your encounter with the "ENFP". What words were exchanged, what matters were discussed? What was this person "like"? How did you behave and how did they behave? Here's the thing: if it feels like supervision, it's probably supervision.

[Eldanen]

Describe your encounter with the "ENFP". What words were exchanged, what matters were discussed? What was this person "like"? How did you behave and how did they behave? Here's the thing: if it feels like supervision, it's probably supervision.

I can't really agree with you on that point. Just because it feels like something doesn't mean it is that. It could just have been an interaction with a psychologically unhealthy person, which it most likely was. I don't really have a reason to label it supervision. It was just an analogy.

[Olduvai]

I can't really agree with you on that point. Just because it feels like something doesn't mean it is that. It could just have been an interaction with a psychologically unhealthy person, which it most likely was. I don't really have a reason to label it supervision. It was just an analogy.

Relations of supervision make you "feel a certain way"; it's like you're "inadequate" or "inferior" or "insufficient", and all you want to do after awhile is avoid the supervisor. The audit will occur whether the supervisor is healthy or unhealthy; if unhealthy, then the encounter might be more "virulent".

[Absurd]

Hehe, LSI and homosexual. Can't be...

[Eldanen]

Relations of supervision make you "feel a certain way"; it's like you're "inadequate" or "inferior" or "insufficient", and all you want to do after awhile is avoid the supervisor. The audit will occur whether the supervisor is healthy or unhealthy; if unhealthy, then the encounter might be more "virulent".

He didn't make me feel bad. That's the funny part.

Hehe, LSI and homosexual. Can't be...

I've known plenty.

[Absurd]

I've known plenty.

I see. All this time I thought Beta Quadra was straight like a circus - it is going to take awhile, just to sink in. Thanks and later.

[Olduvai]

He didn't make me feel bad. That's the funny part.

Then what made you think you were being supervised???

[Eldanen]

Then what made you think you were being supervised???

I didn't. What made you think that?

[Olduvai]

I didn't. What made you think that?

Umm, this:

and how one supposedly supervised me. In reality, I've decided that person was actually an ENFp.

What was that person like? What made you think you were being supervised?

[Eldanen]

Umm, this:

What was that person like? What made you think you were being supervised?[/COLOR]

He was this really outgoing, positive, seemingly uplifting guy I met as a young teenager. He managed to appear jovial and had a lot of intellectual interests, so he was one of the first people I thought of as possible friends. Wasted a lot of time there and ended up really hurt. Like a lot of pathological narcissists, he was very passive aggressive, talked in code a lot, and was really very abusive while being subtle about the entire ordeal. I got away from it eventually. It just took four years to do it and six more to get to where I am today. He was probably the worst person that ever happened in my life. He even stalked me at one point. Not fun at all.

I guess what made me think I was being supervised is the fact that he took me unawares pretty damn well and did so much damage . But then again, I was just a kid. So not really supervision. Just outright abuse.