, I understand how you feel- I am also ridiculously shy, have the social skills of one of the zookeeper's monkeys (actually I hear many ape species have well-defined social structures... an E7 IEE spent some time telling me about this once...), and go on the16types too much when bored during work. A lot of my flaws are less endearing. Sometimes men do approach me and I deflect them or simply say something autistic sounding (something that somehow also signals to them they will likely not get laid) and they go away. My first kiss was when I was 19, and when I immediately confessed to that person it was my first kiss, feeling like it was important to reveal the full truth of my inexperience and not delude him about what he was getting into (...), he later admitted that this was in fact shocking b/c I seemed like "a cute girl."
All that being said, I think gradually giving yourself chances to better those skills is important, not only for finding opportunities to meet people but for trusting yourself enough to develop relationships that are underway. It might also go towards building up confidence and trusting other people's interest in
you. In the wild or on dating sites, finding someone you really click with can just be hard, period, so opening up to more chances is probably helpful. People do judge each other sometimes for ridiculous things; I've found that it works for me to make mental patterns of what traits particular people judge, knowing they just have certain biases and that it's not necessary me. Remember that people are various and that most people are fuckups in some way anyway, so it doesn't really matter in the end.
You may not be actually as shy or socially autistic as me so... if you're reading this and it's overkill just, you know, ignore.