This is SOCIONICS STORY THREAD!

[lagerdemon]

H MY NAME IS LEGER DE MAIN, and i love stories!!!! This is literature/art/music subform, so i'm post this here, and you should 2!!!! if we all come together as a team to add stories to this thread, i'll put in minimal editing effort and help turn thread into anthology!!!! you get 0.01% of profits(negotiable) from amazon sails.

[lagerdemon]

Story 2:

"Wizard of Socionic" by InvisibleJim

There was a young azerbijani child who was deeply humanist, upon encountering the poor she would give them everything she owned to help them with their problems, like a proper humanist. Upon growing up and due to her self impoverishment she thought about how she could be more humanist to benefit all of mankind. She thought about selling fine sandwiches and realised that shipping and receiving these sandwiches would create waste and damage the planet, which would not be humanist. She tried rescuing kittens, but realised that this activity was missing the particular human element that appealed to her. One day she was talking to a lady in the street (that was actually Eliza) who said that a humanist like her could understand a lot about people using socionics. Having heard everything she needed to hear, she stated planning the best way she could serve humanity by being a humanist socionist. She researched all of the specialist wizard skills of socionics, re-typing, information elements, information elephants, cat memes and visual identification. She even bought herself Carl Jungs psychological types and made 'improvements' as she deemed necessary. Soon, she was ready to start typing the world in earnest and in so doing perform the ultimate humanist task. To better serve humanity she decide to charge 99,999 usd to select jury duty because with her new skills this would help her to humanly help the helpless. But, she was very concerned. She started to find people who were mistyped. Accordingly she started to identify these putrid wastrels and target them for retyping. Accordingly she learned the forbidden art of soul trapping and type necromancy to meet her ultimate humanist goal. She encountered many supposed 'IEEs' and 'EIIs' but she decided they were nothing more than SEEs in disguise. Using nothing more than her magic spells she would 'Confirm and Final' their type and trap their souls. But performing such dark arts left her disturbed. With this power she could perform a great service to humanism, but what about her? What about Maritsa's needs? Hadn't she given so much to humanity? Preparing a mighty ritual she summoned into existence many men to meet her needs. Yes, we are just approaching that point Leger. She summoned many husbands and tried to retype them LSE using her magic so that she could acheive true duality. But because this was little more than Socionics Wizardry, it could never work. Eventually, one day observing this several other Socionics wizards saw her asking everyone to 'Vi her Husband' and they engaged her in Wizard combat. These were Kim, Geminatronix and Anndelise. Shocked at their disgust at her type necromancy, they battled her at socionics. They attempted to trap her own humanist soul by retyping and she theirs. Outnumbered she appealed for allies and Eliza also engaged them in battle. The Delta NF socionics wizard war began leaving many threads shattered and ruined. Since then, Maritsa has been rarely seen, some believe her power has been sapped and diminished. But some worry that should she reconstitute her humanist spirit she may raise an army to march on the remaining Delta NF wizardesses of the socionists and that the next time she will be prepared! Some even say that even to this day the battle continues in some threads and that if you post a picture in the wrong thread she may appear and type you 'LSE' or 'SEE' 'Confirmed and Final'. That is the story of Maritsa the socionics wizard. Any similarities with the Lord of the Rings are purely coincidental.

[InvisibleJim]

Story 1:

"The Power of Duality" by InvisibleJim

Once upon a time in Calgary, there was a man wearing a long leather jacket and an chewing tobacco this man was Legerdemain. After defeating Truck in unarmed combat using nothing but the power of his hugs, he planned to conquer California where he had heard of a notorious socionics warrior known only as 'Maritsa' he boarded the first bus to Seattle without a ticket.
The bus driver (hitta) was all like ham fisted like 'I need a ticket'. Leger, using only the power of Se and spooning, licked hitta in the eyeball causing hitta to writhe in pain and implode. Leger then made a potent one liner 'Don't mess with SLEonics', removes Hitta's corpse and puts his foot hard onto the accelerator.
After several days driving with no sleep, sustained only with the power of Se and without wearing a seatbelt, Leger arrives in Seattle and drops off the passengers, who have mostly expired.
HandiAce then boards the buss carrying a 1990s keyboard with the cast of the cult hit film 'Hackers'. Confronting Leger he says 'You must be aware, we know you wish to fight Maritsa, but she is no mere socionist! You require the power of duality if you are to win this battle.'
Leger says to Handiace 'But I have never been dualised before? Even if I can find a dual, how will I know what to do?'
Handiace in typical IEE style says 'Trust in your heart Leger, only you and duality can solve socionics and save mankind.'
Perplexed and continuing on his trip he drives south, he stops in the city of San Francisco for Bacon.
Lured by the scent of bacon several women approach his bus, they are Director Abbie, Geminatronix and Starfall. They tell him that they have heard of their quest and know the great peril posed to humanity by Maritsas socionical tyranny and more that they can help.
Leger says 'Sorry ladies, although I would happily bang any of you on the spot, you must know that my time is short and my path is true, only a true dual can help me with this calamity!'
Director abbie approaches and says 'I can knit faster than god.'
Legerdemain instantly dropkicks her in the face and says 'No-one knits faster than me! You don't have the true power of Se in your veins! You cannot beat god!'
Geminatronix approaches and says 'I have the unparalleled power of love, I can love anything, trees, cats, dogs, beggars, my love is unending'
Legerdemain throws a bag of garbage at her and says 'No dual of mine would love a beggar, they would see them as not socially compliant!' Disappointed with the dismissal, Geminatronix retreats.
Starfall does not approach Leger at all and instead just poses. Intrigued, Leger takes a step closed and Starfall walks back a step, the reverse is true. Perplex Legerdemain simply gets bored and wanders off, to great curiosity Starfall follows him all the way to Los Angeles, where the Tyrannical Maritsa has already started to poison the ground with her Mistypionics.
Yelling 'By the power of Se' Leger strikes at Maritsa he finds his attack utterly ineffective, and Maritsa simply laughs and yells 'LSE, CONFIRMED'. Leger feels the force of Confirmed like an uppercut to the jaw, he is sent backward and destroys a skyscraper.
Raising himself from the wreckage he continuous his futile assault several times.
Feeling that defeat is inevitable, he starts to hesitate, fearing his end at the hand of this uncompromising foe.
Starfall approaches and says 'Leger, remember, you must use the power of duality, only then can you defeat maritsa!' to which Leger replies 'But I have never found a dual and what would I do to dualise anyway?'
Starfall replies 'Just do what feels right!'
Driven by the power of the moment Leger spoons Starfall; this spontaneous act of spooning releases the Duality Ray, the most power weapon known to socionics, and also man.
The duality ray impacts straight on Maritsa turning her to dust.
And that was how Legerdemain used duality to defeat Maritsa and save the city.

[kadda1212]

Unfortunately I still don't know the people here well enough to write a story like that. I do like writing stories a lot.

[DaftPunk]

"The evil troll" by Daft21

Once upon a time there lived a mean and evil troll in a cave his name can’t be outspoken but it contains a 4. His main occupation was terrorizing the surrounding villages with his big club and Base Se. It didn’t take long until the villagers were either killed or expelled by the mean troll. There were few attempts to stand up united against the vilain but he / it was just to strong and cruel to be fought. Maybe the villigers were just to weak due to Si / Ne valuing
After a certain time the troll became bored because there wasn’t anything to terrorize anymore so he decidided to go to a abandonend village to ravage and destroy random stuff there. During ravaging he found in an abandoned house something that’s called a computer by humans. Even though the evil troll never used something like that before he was capable to use it thanks to creative-Ti a gift by Satan himself.
It didn’t take long and the mean troll figured out how to use the internet to troll and terrorize people online. At the beginn the evil troll was only capable to write random words but he learned quickly (at least for a troll) and was soon capable to write almost meaningless oneliners until today. But who knows how much his verbal skill will improve with time and how much damage he can deal in the future?
If he's not dead he's still trolling
To be continued

Any similarities with Shrek are purely concidental