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Thread: Steering types as NF

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    remer's Avatar
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    Default Steering types as NF

    Inspired by the another doubter thread, in particular the means of steering your own type to your liking, and in particular of steering yourself to others liking. And as that makes you a mime, a chameleon.

    A day ago I joined the forums and made my introduction thread and followup post, introducing myself and asking for people to type me. Basically I am asking people from 'over here' to take a look and do me the honors of typing me.

    On the same note I just was wondering, how much influence does an upbringing have on a let's say highly influential chameleon-like individual, maybe like me.
    As I have always felt as one, the person that shapes himself to the form that is most needed, is best desired by others. a mime, I mimic and have been very reflective ever since, basically I'm already reflecting the notion that I say I'm reflective. This meta-level of thought has advantages, but has also caused me troubles, most of the time (now) I am or at least find comfort in a state of melancholy. In the past I just did what I was told, but as an (young)adult is not only allowed but also expected to choose. And I have not been able to choose with certainty education, work, interests, desires. I do have desires, things I like, love and want to do, but at the same time, I don't feel like choosing any of them. I don't want to conform to the need to choose, the need to desire. As from an ethical standpoint, the world is at it is, because we have desires that drive us to things, that can be good and be nice, but at the same time may be harmful to others, beings, people or animal, and the environment. I felt by not choosing I would do this world a benefit. But here I am in this Zugzwang, I have to choose, where do I live, what do I eat. whom do I hang with, basically not choosing is not living, and there is that thing with money, Oh yes, I want to be alive, but I don't desire to be in the now, to be practical. Let me be, immortal, always there to observe what is to happen, to see development, to experience change and possible progress. To be or become a constant reminder, statue, embodiment. Now I feel like a martyr dying without a cause. How messed up is that.

    So in that introduction thread and by own writing I have dominantly acted alpha NT. And I concur, oh yes, I do see recognition in the LII archetype a lot. By writing and thinking about it, right then, I can say I do enjoy the values that alpha favors. Yet I have this after every movie I intensely watch, I become the protagonist, feels what he feels, fears what he fears. Back in my mind I have this voice, this notion, that occurred to me most clearly, when I slept next to my probably SEI (now ex)girlfriend, the point where I felt I should be most happy, that there something amiss, dark and totally not "happy smile positive demeanor" is inside me. Then there was this councillor many years later that was upset after we talked of the notion that I honestly believed I felt this desire to connect to everyone, but at the same time would not move a single inch from my pedestal as she put it. I guess a NT gone mad might be an explanation, but another I felt was like, as NFs seem to be the most adjustable, can it be under two very dominant parents I adapted my identity to their most ideally pictured son? Because that feels so very true,, for whatever reason, I feel like a cocoon waiting to burst.

    I have been playing with the Sociotypograph, and I can't see it. Is it democratic vs aristocratic. Merry vs serious. Decisive vs reasonable. Perspectives (can) change constantly.
    I sincerely hope someone can shed their light upon this question of mine.

    Please look at this, and type me?
    Last edited by remer; 09-04-2013 at 03:39 PM. Reason: i felt like rewriting some parts to better reflect what i meant

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    Idiot Iris's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by remer View Post
    I have been playing with the Sociotypograph, and I can't see it. Is it democratic vs aristocratic. Merry vs serious. Decisive vs reasonable. Perspectives (can) change constantly.
    I sincerely hope someone can shed their light upon this question of mine.

    Please look at this, and type me?
    When I saw that sociotypograph I was so excited and wanted it to work so I could figure out my type and move on to doing something with that information. But typing by dichotomies is not successful for me. There is too much potential for me to misunderstand them.

    What has helped me to at least settle on a quadra is concentrating on one or two information elements that I actually understand, and looking to see which functional descriptions seem to be the best fit. Spending time with people and observing their use of Si and how I felt working with them helped me understand that Si is not a valued element for me. So that rules out Alpha and Delta. That has helped me when something makes me think I could be ILE or IEE.

    You seek a great fortune, you three who are now in chains. You will find a fortune, though it will not be the one you seek.
    But first you must travel a long and difficult road, a road fraught with peril.
    You shall see things, wonderful to tell. You shall see a... cow... on the roof of a cotton house. And, oh, so many startlements.
    I cannot tell you how long this road shall be, but fear not the ob-stacles in your path, for fate has vouchsafed your reward.
    Though the road may wind, yea, your hearts grow weary, still shall ye follow them, even unto your salvation
    .


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pukq_XJmM-k

  3. #3
    Moderator Reficulris's Avatar
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    Liked for relating to the "miming people" aspect, although I also tend to counter-mime if I don't like people.

    Also; I'm not an expert or really knowledgable about socionics, so this comes from general psychology: Don't judge yourself harshly based on this or anything else. Asking "how messed up is that" seems like a request for acknowledgement that you're ok. I feel that you might need to start accepting yourself as is before typing yourself as your negative judgement of certain attitudes might get in the way. Also, its much more fun being you if you're ok with that ;-)

    Taking ALL feelings or the global wellfare of the world into account on every small decision or "choice" is a pretty good way to get yourself depressed yes. It is also kinda narcistic since no-one expects you to safe the world on your own. (I used to be like that). Try to reduce the level of specificity to your direct environment and take your own tastes and preferences into account will make life more enjoyable. Also; i think you use your emotional sensitivity as an excuse not to chose, there might be something else behind that. This is something you can't get from typing or even the internet IMHO.

    Edited for more stuff:

    Also, don't misuse Ni as an excuse not do choose. Trying stuff without predicting good or bad concequences or possible hurdles is a good way to get out of your predicament. You don't need to choose once, you can chooce to change your mind, you'll chooce again. Nothing is set in stone and no path can't be deviated from, even though Ni sometimes suggests this. (read intuition/prediction if Ni doesn't work this way ;-) as said, i'm not a socionics expert)


    //non-socionics advice

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    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    it's really hard at first for a person to see their base function and people just assume others can see it better than them and say "oh you're this or that" and they believe it. I've seen that happen here. It is always best to not judge yourself on how you view yourself but how others view you because we have desires about how we think we are when it's just not the reality. The person who typed me was my mother. She read the functional descriptions and said, "this one." How was she right? She asked specific questions.

    1. Honey, read and describe to me what each one is first. I read her this: http://socionics.us/theory/information.shtml

    This is how I described them:

    "Mom, Ne is the dark triangle. It is a person who is active and actively searching for newness, novel things and possibilities; since it's an extravert, they are talkative, highly social. Light triangle is someone more about inside their own mind...Dark L is a person who is always sarcastically cracking jokes and wanting to take center of attention with dramatized movements and the person prods others so they can get and read emotional cues and understand their motives. The light L is about someone who makes judgements of morality in the actions of others and in the world altogether. The Light L is about altruism and responsible actions with regards to other human beings, and meeting the needs of people."

    After doing this she thought about it for a minute.

    2. Then I read her this: http://socionics.us/works/socion2.shtml#1; http://socionics.us/works/semantics.shtml

    After reading all of these to her. She said, "honey, I know you think you're intelligent in a non emotional way, but you're not. You're not an ILE, you're an EII; your interest in Law, medicine, and journalism is not from a standpoint of a type who does not concern themselves with humans but rather that because you love humanity and you learn these things to help them. You're always looking to find and fulfill the needs of others in creative ways so I can see why you might think you're ILE. But you're in your head a lot and you lose track of things around you. I always have to protect you from people who take advantage of your good will and kindness."

    That made me cry. She knows me so well.

    This is why I love being here...to help people

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    remer's Avatar
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    @Iris When I discovered the Sociotypograph I too was instantly excited about the possibilities of this tool. Over time I have found it a hard tool to use as you
    must be so certain for it to be effective.


    Thanks Refficulris for your thoughtfulness. I want to react to some parts you said. I don't believe one person can change the world alone, but I do believe that one person can inspire others to join them. And then striving for the best possible goal is, although you may never reach it, can result in achieving milestones you may have never achieved while only shooting for average and realism. The point I try to make it, once you for whatever reason cannot inspire others to join you, it is so hard not to feel utterly alone. And I have felt alone for quite some time and that shaped me in what I am. Me.

    @Maritsa thank you for helping.

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