ann's video?

[anndelise]

I'm considering joining the band wagon, but haven't fully committed to the idea of making a video. If I were to make one, what questions would you like me to answer? And if you would prefer I not do a video, lemme know, that sounds good too, heh.

Also, my daughter has been wanting to make a video to clear up some misconceptions of me. (I sometimes show her what people have written about me.) So if anyone has questions for her, list them here. However, please keep the questions simple and don't use socionics terminology. I don't want to be accused of biasing her answers by my trying to explain concepts to her. So keep it simple language that a teen might use.

[Galen]

What's your ideal architectural aesthetic for a house? Any specific examples?

[applejacks]

Where have you traveled? Where would you want to go?

Favorite food?

Describe your earliest childhood memory.

[Hays]

I would like to hear what your daughter and yourself enjoy about your relationship and what things you like doing together.
Also what your daughter thinks about any hobbies you may have, especially your latest hobby.
What is the most recent thing you have learnt?
Perhaps a random shot of hubby or is he boyfriend?
How's that vegetable garden going?
Has any one recently rolled their eyes around you and why?
What do you think is your main way of interacting with people in 'real life'?
Any chance of a peak into your wardrobe to see what you mainly wear each day?
Do you wake others up to tell them things you have learnt?
Tell us something funny from your past.
How do you know that you are a feeling type?
Can you introduce us to your pets :-)

[anndelise]

I would like to hear what your daughter and yourself enjoy about your relationship and what things you like doing together.
Also what your daughter thinks about any hobbies you may have, especially your latest hobby.
What is the most recent thing you have learnt?
Perhaps a random shot of hubby or is he boyfriend?
How's that vegetable garden going?
Has any one recently rolled their eyes around you and why?
What do you think is your main way of interacting with people in 'real life'?
Any chance of a peak into your wardrobe to see what you mainly wear each day?
Do you wake others up to tell them things you have learnt?
Tell us something funny from your past.
How do you know that you are a feeling type?
Can you introduce us to your pets :-)

that's at least one video..most likely more!
If you'd like, we could skype sometime, instead,
(An actual conversation between you and i would be fun, imo. Assuming we could each get pass our own embarrassments and personal insecurities.)

[HandiAce]

Have you overcome any genes by your experiences? Have you overcome an experience with experiences?

[Hays]

that's at least one video..most likely more!
If you'd like, we could skype sometime, instead,
(An actual conversation between you and i would be fun, imo. Assuming we could each get pass our own embarrassments and personal insecurities.)

Fast paced action with camera rolling tape from one hobby site, family member & pet to another with a skim through your closet and garden as you run and huff & puff thoughts towards the video camera!

Really it's just a few ideas to pick and choose from and anything enlightening about yourself would be good to hear.

I don't have Skype set up yet but maybe I should look at it sometime soon :-)

[anndelise]

Remember who you're talking to...I'm the one who writes long convoluted posts...and that is AFTER editing my words!

I made a video, answering Jadae, Galen, applejacks, and Handi's questions. Unfortunately...it's friggin 20 min long!! I could edit it, but then that would also be editing out quite a bit of my personality. So, I am going to figure out how to split it, then upload it to youtube.

Shayley if you still would like me to answer your q's, i'll do another video tomorrow. And we'll do Manta's video tomorrow.

I'm still open to ya'll saying..no, nvm...we don't want a friggin 20 min video of you (me). Especially since it ain't pretty, lol, add on the distortion of the ipain camera lense and it's even less aesthetically pleasing, ...seriously. Just say No!

[anndelise]

You have been warned!!
Gah...youtube's screen capture shot is horrific!!

1. Answers
* Where my fav places are, and why i like them;
* architectural aesthetics for a house (i think??);
* and where have I traveled.

VID DELETED: msg me if you want to see it

2. My favorite video of the three:
Answers
* Where would I want to travel to;
* Favorite food;
* earliest childhood memories

VID DELETED: msg me if you want to see it

3. The absolute shortest of the three:
Answers
* Overcoming genes & experiences

VID DELETED: msg me if you want to see it

[Hays]

Shayley if you still would like me to answer your q's, i'll do another video tomorrow.

If you're in the frame of mind for it then give it a go I say!

[Hays]

Hey Anndelise video #2 is not viewable as it' says it's set to private.

Have enjoyed the video #1.



Tried it a second time and it seems like you changed setting already :-)

[anndelise]

Hey Anndelise video #2 is not viewable as it' says it's set to private.

Have enjoyed the video #1.

I got it working now. Had accidently set it to private during the upload process.

[Narc]

Just set it to linked viewing only, like I did. I'm curious.

[anndelise]

Ok, so i freaked out.
I'm uncomfortable having such personal video of myself available for certain people to see and/or have links to.

Msg me if you want to see them.

Will still do my daughter's tomorrow, though. And Shayleys. Just probably won't post them so freely.

[Hays]

They were good Anndelise...and they have me thinking and I was hoping to watch them a second time through this evening. Any chance that I could watch them again?

[anndelise]

They were good Anndelise...and they have me thinking and I was hoping to watch them a second time through this evening. Any chance that I could watch them again?

Links pm'd to ya.

[willekeurig]

I want to see them too!

[anndelise]

This is the video with my daughter answering some of Shayley's questions. It's titled "Interview with The Devil" because of the whole devilfish = manta ray = daughter's name thing. (She wanted that cleared up, heh.) In this video she answers questions about our relationship, what we like to do together, her thoughts on my hobbies, rolling her eyes at me, and a couple of misconceptions she's been wanting to clear up. AND, she makes cupcakes for her cake decorating class. Out of the oven pic at end of this post. And I will update with another pic of the results of the decorating lesson. (This post has been approved.)



Edited to add the promised picture (which i immediately forgot i said i would do that, lol).

The cupcakes on the right are the ones i said might be too big. The ones on the left half she adjusted how much to put in. (Relevant to a portion of the video.) The big ones didn't come out as messy as I thought they might.

[Kim]

I LOVE the video with Manta. Your interaction with each other is adorable and awesome. My favorite part is the random "I still can't believe you want me to make 24 cupcakes!"

Oh, and "But that is like a different part of my room!"

[anndelise]

I LOVE the video with Manta. Your interaction with each other is adorable and awesome. My favorite part is the random "I still can't believe you want me to make 24 cupcakes!"

Ok, for the record on that one, the box says it makes 24 cupcakes. She wanted half the box to go towards making a cake. But a cake cannot be easily given away to multiple people (rather it is more likely to sit at home as temptation). So it wasn't that I wanted 24 cupcakes made...it's that i wanted the boxed ingredients to be in a form to quickly get rid of it all!!

Plus...it would give her more practice with decorating cupcakes and small items.

(Btw, i read all the above to her. Her point is...she could also have practiced decorating a full size cake AND that she thinks we should eat the cupcakes ourselves. Uh...NO!!! To which she says "Gawd Mom". Bah humbug. )

[anndelise]

Oh, and "But that is like a different part of my room!"

She is laying on my bed, i read this to her, and it started that 'argument' up again, lol.
Perhaps when i do Shayley's questions I will show the different locations referenced in this, so I can redeem myself.

[Kim]

She is laying on my bed, i read this to her, and it started that 'argument' up again, lol.
Perhaps when i do Shayley's questions I will show the different locations referenced in this, so I can redeem myself.

I thought the way you said it was so cute!! <3

[Absurd]

Ahhh, dolphin is making cupcakes.

[GuavaDrunk]

Cute.

I can tell it's a relationship where parties had to work on significant tensions. Go you (plural).

[blackburry]

I like your voice!!! and you and your daughter seem very nice.

[Scapegrace]

That was a great video, Anndelise. It makes me miss having a mum.

I actually remember when you first joined the forum and I think it was partially because you were perplexed about your relationship with her, and honestly I was taken aback because you were so open about it. I actually remember thinking "she really resents her kid" (I was very young and stupid). Your pride at her achievements and the way you support her is so nice. I can see now that you were just trying to figure out the best way to mother her and I think you nailed it. She's seems like a great person.

[Hays]

I very much enjoyed the video with your daughter who at first I was unsure between ISTp & ENFj from a VI standpoint but there's a lot of Fe there and I think she is most likely ENFj.
Think of Juliet Lewis, as to me these two are the same type.

I feel quite confident in locking in ENFj for her with INFp being next choice.

Am I correct in remembering that you mentioned once that she has been diagnosed with something like Aspergers from the autism spectrum?
I think she would be a fairly unique case if so as not that many of Aspergers sufferers seem to have so much Fe but then she is a female one which from my understanding there are less of in the first place.

Your daughter has a beautiful smile and laughter and the interaction between you both put a smile on my face also!

Still pondering over your other videos :-)

[anndelise]

Socionics-wise...
My brother (NiFe) and I have typed Manta as SeFi.
And yes, she has been diagnosed as having autistic like issues. I believe that these issues are related to the medications I was on before, at time of, and up to 5 months after her conception.

There is absolutely no doubts in our minds that Reinin-wise she processes information via Static, Sensing, Strategic, and Process. In fact, many of our difficulties comes from the differences between her Strategic&Process vs my Tactics&Results. This is actually underlying her complaints about me and how I drive her insane.(and vice versa) Well...that and the Ne base Ni ignoring vs Se base Si ignoring thing. Where we ARE able to connect is Fe demonstartive, Fi creative, Te HA, and Ti polr.

[anndelise]

Thank you, @Scapegrace.
I know a number of people thought I was probably an overbearing, resentful mom. One person even accused me of being over-protective and strict simply because for example, when she was 7yo I had set guidelines on what sites she could visit and to not to download anything. (I am not computer literate so downloading a virus or other malware would have not been easily taken care of...and I couldn't afford it.) Nevermind that she gradually started exploring other age appropriate sites on her own and teaching herself how to get around the computer and internet without me interfering. Meanwhile, at the same time, I had other parents accusing me of being a bad mom because I wasn't strict enough and allowed her to do things like climb on the car, walk ahead of me on the trail to meet her uncle, etc. One mother even tried to convince me that hacking into my daughter's emails and facebook etc was what a loving and caring mom should be doing. (Parents receive tons of unsolicited and conflicting advice on how they should be taking care of their kids.)

I think one of the problems was that my daughter had not been diagnosed, and she didn't show the introverted related signs commonly associated with autism. So I couldn't get professional help for her...nor us. It fell on my shoulders to help her, so I was pretty focused and intense on getting ideas and such, even if it meant people thought ill of me as a parent.

We do still have our problems, as was hinted at in the video. But we try to work through them. When she finally got diagnosed, that helped us both, a lot. We've been able to get outside assitance finally, so now it's not all on my shoulders. Which means our relationship has been able to improve and I can relax more due to less demands placed on me. And, she's finally getting help from people who are experienced with her issues.

But yeah, things were pretty bad when I first joined.
But what the clip showed...her able to freely talk, feel confident and safe, and taking steps towards her own independence...that's what I've wanted for her. She's come such a hugely long way that I find her inspiring, as well.

Edited to add: still, with all that said, I am pretty burned out. So if I seem anxious these days to have her move out soon after she's 18....well, we both are, lol. But it won't be done without properly setting her up for successes and having a safety net in place.

[Galen]

You have this same habit I have regarding eye contact. Your eyes wander up a lot when you're trying to find the words you want to say, only returning your gaze to the interlocutor (in this case, either the camera or the video feed) when talking about some main point you want to convey. Apparently this is a red flag to some, like it's a sign of shiftiness or lack of interest, although it seems pretty apparent that this is not the case for you as you present yourself as genuine.

You seem to do a lot of mental troubleshooting through various situations, particularly in my question. Your ideas and conclusions seem rather well thought out, taking into consideration all possibilities and consequences of specific factors into the long-term. You also came off as a tad self-conscious in the beginning, but you readily acknowledged it and shrugged it off as the video went on. You seem to have a rather head-centered perspective on the world, trying to take lots of different things into account with "could haves" and "what ifs."


As for my question, you were almost where I was expecting to go. First off, since I'm asking just about "ideal," I wasn't anticipating any negative consequences of each situation since we're dealing with ... well ... an ideal. Also perhaps my language was a bit too obfuscatory, since I was really just concerned with what architectural styles you're drawn to: tree-house, apartment complex, Taj Mahal, etc.

[anndelise]

@Galen. I thamks for the clarification. I felt i was missing something, but wasn't sure what. Since I don't tend to think of 'architectural styles', it would have been easier to answer in an actual conversation with feedback.

I do have a little difficulty with 'ideals' in that on one hand there is the "if only..." factor, but on the other hand I'm also looking at it from a different pov or two. So I also do a "yeah but...." soon after. It drives even me bonkers. I've never been sure if this is related to Ne, "holographic thinking", e6, or even my borderline diagnosis (or related to the paragraph below about my daughter).

As for the eye thing, NLP has an interesting theory about where our eyes move to might signal what kind of information we are trying to pull out of our minds. But I think also there is what I've called the curtain. I've joked (while being serious about it) that I often feel as if I am waiting for the man behind the curtain to slip a piece of paper inder the curtain that gives me the info I am looking for. Like there's a huge section of my mind that I don't have direct access to. Quite annoying, really. And also, sometimes shutting out other stimulus can help with focusing, some. (I chuckled at myself as I watched video me close my eyes for a particularly long time while trying to get something out )

I do think my long-term thinking and 'mental troubleshooting' has improved. I believe the improvement is connected to my daughter. With her, I had to get something exactly right, the very first time presenting it to her. If I didn't, all hell would break loose. In the video with her, when she mentions that she's more flexible now, there is a connection. I couldn't give her what she needed/wanted, no matter how hard I tried. So while I was working on trying to, she was also having to deal with allowing me to make mistakes and allowing me to correct something based on feedback. Um...it was a horrific ordeal for us both, and counts amongst many of our "yelling at each other" situations she mentioned in her vid.

Thanks, Galen, for your constructive feedback.
Where's your video??

[Hays]

Socionics-wise...
My brother (NiFe) and I have typed Manta as SeFi.
And yes, she has been diagnosed as having autistic like issues. I believe that these issues are related to the medications I was on before, at time of, and up to 5 months after her conception.

There is absolutely no doubts in our minds that Reinin-wise she processes information via Static, Sensing, Strategic, and Process. In fact, many of our difficulties comes from the differences between her Strategic&Process vs my Tactics&Results. This is actually underlying her complaints about me and how I drive her insane.(and vice versa) Well...that and the Ne base Ni ignoring vs Se base Si ignoring thing. Where we ARE able to connect is Fe demonstartive, Fi creative, Te HA, and Ti polr.

Mum knows best...though I think the dichotomies don't necessarily apply well to people within the autism spectrum, for example I have not yet met one who would be classed as clearly Dynamic over Static as they tend not to be very much the initiator in many situations or overly reactive to the external happenings.
Often they also tend to be quite reliable once started on a path, continuing with what has already begun and tending not to deviate or switch from one option to another.
Overall they seem to not adapt that well to change instead preferring sameness, routines, maybe even rules and making little alteration to that which they are accustomed.

[anndelise]

Mum knows best...though I think the dichotomies don't necessarily apply well to people within the autism spectrum, for example I have not yet met one who would be classed as clearly Dynamic over Static as they tend not to be very much the initiator in many situations or overly reactive to the external happenings.
Often they also tend to be quite reliable once started on a path, continuing with what has already begun and tending not to deviate or switch from one option to another.
Overall they seem to not adapt that well to change instead preferring sameness, routines, maybe even rules and making little alteration to that which they are accustomed.

It's not just me who typed her, my brother was into socionics at one time, as well.

As for Dynamic vs Static and it's relation to autism, I think we have differing understandings of Dynamic and Static. I see Dynamic as processing information that is along the lines of a system, where parts are interacting with other parts and how they influence each other. Trends and changes are noticed rather than sticking with a current moment. Whereas a Static type is mostly looking at things as they are now, and/or what consistently shows up over time/space. Dynamic types, i believe, might have an easier time projecting how something is going to change, and in which direction.

One example (the only famous autistic person I've read about):
Temple Grandin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temple_Grandin) is, imo, a dynamic type. She was able to see systems involving animals and their processing, and was able to build more effecient and more humane systems for processing cattle. She knew how everything fit together, what effected what, what changed what, what trends were happening during the processing, how to go about changing some of those trends, etc. She revolutionized how most of the usa processes it's cattle.

When my daughter was first diagnosed, we watched a movie about Temple's life. She was heavily involved in the making of the movie. While my daughter didn't identify with the type of information Temple focused on, she did identify with some of the behavioral reactions. But socionics isn't about behavior...it's about the intra-processing and inter-communicating of information.

Without having fully thought it all out, I might say that Temple is quite possibly TeSi.

If you get a chance to, watch the movie about her.

[Hays]

It's not just me who typed her, my brother was into socionics at one time, as well.

As for Dynamic vs Static and it's relation to autism, I think we have differing understandings of Dynamic and Static. I see Dynamic as processing information that is along the lines of a system, where parts are interacting with other parts and how they influence each other. Trends and changes are noticed rather than sticking with a current moment. Whereas a Static type is mostly looking at things as they are now, and/or what consistently shows up over time/space. Dynamic types, i believe, might have an easier time projecting how something is going to change, and in which direction.

One example (the only famous autistic person I've read about):
Temple Grandin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temple_Grandin) is, imo, a dynamic type. She was able to see systems involving animals and their processing, and was able to build more effecient and more humane systems for processing cattle. She knew how everything fit together, what effected what, what changed what, what trends were happening during the processing, how to go about changing some of those trends, etc. She revolutionized how most of the usa processes it's cattle.

When my daughter was first diagnosed, we watched a movie about Temple's life. She was heavily involved in the making of the movie. While my daughter didn't identify with the type of information Temple focused on, she did identify with some of the behavioral reactions. But socionics isn't about behavior...it's about the intra-processing and inter-communicating of information.

Without having fully thought it all out, I might say that Temple is quite possibly TeSi.

If you get a chance to, watch the movie about her.

I watched a 10 minute video clip of Temple Grandin and have to say from the little I saw that to me what you are calling Dynamic in her is an Autism Spectrum type preoccupation/fascination with certain topics/intense absorption in special interests which in her case seems to be a relate-ability to fear within animals and an understanding of their behaviours, particularly cows which leads to a concern for their ethical treatment.
I also noted she said that scenes play like a movie on a big screen in her mind...
because she described it as scenes playing I wondered if it fitted with the Static point of viewing reality as sets of episodes, scenes, pictures...not sure...

I might go and watch a few more videos about her...

[Galen]

I do have a little difficulty with 'ideals' in that on one hand there is the "if only..." factor, but on the other hand I'm also looking at it from a different pov or two. So I also do a "yeah but...." soon after. It drives even me bonkers. I've never been sure if this is related to Ne, "holographic thinking", e6, or even my borderline diagnosis (or related to the paragraph below about my daughter).

I would think it's a combination of holographic + E6. I can get the same way, although I find myself a bit more mediated in how that side of me operates.

As for the eye thing, NLP has an interesting theory about where our eyes move to might signal what kind of information we are trying to pull out of our minds. But I think also there is what I've called the curtain. I've joked (while being serious about it) that I often feel as if I am waiting for the man behind the curtain to slip a piece of paper inder the curtain that gives me the info I am looking for. Like there's a huge section of my mind that I don't have direct access to. Quite annoying, really. And also, sometimes shutting out other stimulus can help with focusing, some. (I chuckled at myself as I watched video me close my eyes for a particularly long time while trying to get something out )

I keep reading NLP as NPH, you're gonna have to remind me who that is, haha
Interesting theory nonetheless. I relate to the "huge section of my mind I don't have direct access to" as well. It's like I start off with the conclusion I've drawn, but explicitly connecting the points between where my idea is now to the end gets difficult to express verbally. Kinda like how it's easier to solve a maze backwards than it is forwards (has anybody else experienced this, or just me?) I have to disconnect from the outside world to draw those connections, which apparently some can see as "shady." I never thought of it as a particularly bad thing, rather that it's just a little inconsequential idiosyncrasy.

Thanks, Galen, for your constructive feedback.
Where's your video??

My computer was out of commission for a couple days, but it's back up now. Once I figure out the video capture software and can feel comfortable talking to myself without others around I'll get it done.

[willekeurig]

It's titled "Interview with The Devil" because of the whole devilfish = manta ray = daughter's name thing.

Wow, I have a friend whose daughter is named Manta, also after the Manta Rays.

[Esaman]

I think she is rational. Going straightforwardly for the point. Not SEE like at all.
Irrational to rational would be would be more tangible explanation of the mismatch and then adding Ti PoLR to Ti suggestive would further that to explain the "driving insane" part.

[anndelise]

@Galen:
NLP= neuro-linguistic programming the eye cues theory is just one of many that they have.




a random NLP site on it: http://www.youlied.org/CWFIA%20Class%20Summary.htm
A critic of it: http://ananael.blogspot.com/2012/07/...l-science.html

The thing to remember when checking for what you do yourself is to reverse the left/right, as the picture is referring to your own left/right when looking at someone else's eyes.

Disclaimer: posting this doesn't mean I'm a believer of it.

[anndelise]

Wow, I have a friend whose daughter is named Manta, also after the Manta Rays.

Does she get Spanish people asking why she named her daughter a "blanket"?

I read the above to Manta and she said "Holy shit, there's another one of me?"

[willekeurig]

Does she get Spanish people asking why she named her daughter a "blanket"?

I read the above to Manta and she said "Holy shit, there's another one of me?"

Not that I've heard.
Yeah, there's another one. She's only 2,5 years old, but you can really see the Manta-ish spirit in her already.