Woah, a lot happened since I was last here!

@truck - I am a little weary of using how I was in my childhood as a guide to tell me my type/valued functions. I have a number of pivotal events and relationships from my youth that I believe shaped me and the information on which I focus and care about. I will say I remember being far more outgoing and friendly than I am now. I was also quite wacky and playful. I connected more with adults than other children. . .in fact, I always had a lot of trouble connecting with people my age until my late teens. I don't think it was because I was really mature or precocious or anything like that, I just was kind of a strange, zany kid, doing her own thing, and I think adults appreciated that more than other kids who were probably more aware of things like fitting in and being cool or something. I also remember a handful of times that I was cruel to other people and feeling immense guilt afterward (there's one thing for which I still feel guilty to this day, and it happened when I was 4). Even though I was a little. . . eccentric, I wasn't loud or wild or anything. I was pretty creative too, and spent hours writing long stories about animals that talked to each other and drawing pictures of them. These are my memories. When I asked my mother about how I was as a baby and toddler, she said I was quiet, shy, and somewhat scared of people and noise.

Anyway, I don't know if I believe I have some internal "essence". I am not sure if there is a difference between my identity and my valued functions. I also have very intense reactions to people and things going on in a room still to this day! I did read up a little on masks, but I would assume that it's something that someone develops later in life or only adopts in certain situations to preserve him or herself.

@Iris - It's an interesting observation about your lack of desire to call your friend after surgery. When I call people or I reach out to them, it's usually not because I want them to think I care or because it's polite, I more do it when I really am concerned, or upset, or I want to offer them support and care, etc. I don't really call people "just to chat" though. I consider that a chore, and I try to avoid it. Though I will admit there have been a few occasions that really insistent friends have called me to do just that and that I actually ended up enjoying the conversation. Imagine that.