Sorry SEE's, but I have to ask. My Mom's caregiver is a SEE, she stays here while I work, and she seems to be incompetent at most things. "Light" housework goes with the job, but its really light and you basically pick your work, just any job of any duration at any point of the day. She likes laundry, but she will start it and not finish it. I have a busy job, my Mom to take care of when I get home and my son who is a teen but that takes awareness (and driving here and there) and everyone to shop cook and clean for and I will have time to do ONE necc. load of wash - and the washing machine will be full and the dryer too. I have to do that before I can do my one load.
And her wash is all mixed up. She will wash anything, and altogether, a whole mix of items, then into the dryer, all of it. All my moms sweaters are shrunken. I have told her many times and I think she has it finally got this: if you choose to do a wash, do just one and finish it. But everything still ends up in dryer. Its so much work to explain things to her but then I go to the trouble and she does things her own crazy way anyway.
I decided to make a suggestion list so I am not just cleaning up after her and everyone else too. The second day into the list choice method, disaster. One suggestion was clean the windows to the patio, and vacuum the screens (I usu. do this once a year myself). Well, she yanked out the screens and broke 5 of them! They won't go in now! They cost around $50 to replace each! Its nice weather and I can't open the windows now! I know she is poor but she is denying any responsibility. My budget is very tight. They were "deteriorating" she says (the metal/plastic corners are snapped, not deteriorated but she can't follow that reasoning). She wrote a long letter to my brother indignant that she be told she "brake" them and how she was once a homeowner (I honestly don't think she was) and she knows how to take care of things and things around here need maintenance. Believe me, my ESTJ brother knows about maintenance. He maintains! Two houses, his and a double with tenants. Plus is two jobs and many hobbies...
It would be one thing if she said, "Sorry,I forced them and I broke them and I can't afford to replace them" but when she denies doing it, I can only think some other crazy thing will happen next (crazy things do happen).
She also is secretive about where she goes. I said she can take Mom with her when she goes on errands but i would like to know where she goes. Like what part of town, what plaza, whose house, how long? But its like pulling teeth to find out anything. She gives brief answers - always "appt." or "errand" that require much asking. I ask and its like, "Jan's". Well who is Jan and where does she live?. She is so secretive.
She is also bossy. My ESTP son can't stand her for this. She feels entitled to boss all kids no matter how big, and I have told her to leave him alone but that doesn't stop her (sometimes he gets home before me).... Well, she bosses in general.
Okay, any type can be wacky, but how much of this is type related?? Because the other SEE I know well is my SLI boyfriends young adult daughter, and she is the extreme of responsibility-shirking. And incompetent! Cant even make her own 3 year old's mac n' cheese... But she excels in bossing others to do things for her...
Any insight into this situation??