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Thread: Love to Hate Me, Hate to Love Me!!

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    lump's Avatar
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    Default Love to Hate Me, Hate to Love Me!!

    is this sort of attitude TYPE RELATED??

    @Ath

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    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    I don't understand what it is; I need to understand what you're saying.

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    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    oh

    one word

    GROSS

    I prefer a spiritual love. Love us.

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    probably not I think its just human.

    if i feel romantic right away with somebody - that usually is a sign they are a narcissitic sociopathic fucking with me. If it's more slowly over time, then it feels more genuine. But objectively, that means they probably are just better at manipulation. *sigh i wish i was naive and idealistic again*

    it sux for me cause like a lot of girls i fall in love with bad boys who are prison risks. (my close friends are also like female bad girl types who are violent and borderline personality) so many men are like 'fuck you you can't tell me what to do im my own person i don't owe anything to society or anybody. i know im selfish and im unkind now fuck off' but then they will see you in a vulnerable position where your female/gay boy instincts need protected and they will save your life and create romantic chemistry and you wonder if they were doing that because they really cared about you too or because they were just fucking with you/gaslighting you deeper... and all this tension creates romantic love lol.

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    yeah maritsa that spiritual 'everything is love' and 'love us' and unified love sounds so nice on paper.

    but realistically when i mingle in social groups im always hyper aware of who is protecting my vulnerabilities and who is not. if somebody is my prince charming (and me theirs) whether by manipulation or by natural accident then i can't help but position them personally on a higher tier then the people who just do whatever they want and then blame me for not liking it 'because im too sensitive.'

    i tried to do the Oprah thing and be like 'we are just all one' and om in my room but i just can't. something about that feels disingenuous to me.

    And yes I can protect my own vulnerabilities. Like an asshole is mean to me but my close friends can still tell it bothers me and im just trying to do the independent thing and 'toughen up about it' but we still have shared empathy and love to know what people's weak spots are and not abuse them for it.
    Last edited by bnd; 01-11-2013 at 09:51 AM.

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    Decadent Charlatan Aquagraph's Avatar
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    When I want something with someone, indifference is the worse he can give me. I believe this is more common with people who count on their existence to make an effect on many.

    I tend to say that if someone doesn't hate you, you haven't done anything.
    “I tell you, freedom and human rights in America are doomed. The U.S. government will lead the American people in — and the West in general — into an unbearable hell and a choking life. - Osama bin Laden

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    I "love" people I may "hate," but I think Kassie is referring to secondary idea.

    I think the secondary idea exists in that the relation is more about the self than the other.

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    lol @zap what you quoted isn't related to the OP at all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by zap View Post
    rly? I didn't read too thoroughly. still, doesnt it apply to u somewhat, lungs?
    i'm kind of bored so i'll reply even tho its a shit-stirring derail. i do relate to a lot of what you quoted from that great diagnostic tool similar minds lol. i think that site is really prone to forer but what pops out as not applying to me..."often experiences disgust," "thinks life is overrated," "would rather remain alone than risk rejection." but this group of phrases seems like it could easily come from depression and/or anxiety, to me. theres no denying i can definitely be paranoid. i also have several traits that are very different from the tone of the traits in that quote; its not "me" so to speak.

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    Quote Originally Posted by zap View Post
    then again ain't this relative lungs? you told me once in chatbox you don't have a grotesque sense of aesthetics yet compared to others u def do.
    yeah part of the problem with analyzing myself or typing myself has to do with putting things up to my standards instead of the most common standard. i dont consider my taste all that grotesque because i rarely think "oh cool, thats so grotesque." so instead of noticing how my taste is different from others i notice how it resonates personally.

    also weren't u love/hate-ish w/ that repairman?
    mmm...love/hate would be a very strong word choice. but my opinion about him has vacillated, yeah. which isnt necessarily that uncommon for me but i don't know if love/hate sentiments are any more common in me than in other people. i might think about them and verbalize them more since i think about my feelings a lot.

    regarding "would rather remain alone than risk rejection.", if ur main oldham style is vigilante then it seems ur main solution would be the resignation one. Towards the bottom it says resignation is predominant in paranoid type amongst others. Vigilante style devolves into paranoid PD. I agree it's not u in full tho.
    i just dont agree with the statement. my behavior sometimes retreats and sometimes reaches out to people but i want to take risks to experience intimacy, and i make an effort, so that is how i would classify my orientation.

    i remember relating to devoted, sensitive, and vigilant in oldham and getting vigilant on one test. i don't have paranoid pd.

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    Sounds like an immature high schooler posting shit on facebook. Anyone who carries that attitude probably doesn't actually think that way. They may tell themselves that but it's pure insecurity. I'd say that people who are proponents of that attitude are usually huge shit-stirrers and love to cause drama. Usually it's Ni-Se Quadras and probably ethical extraverts.
    Last edited by Contra; 08-26-2014 at 02:22 AM.

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    I've made a few enemies along the way, I think it's just par for the course.
    "Traffic lights and loneliness. Paper cans and tape cassettes. When the world feels like this. Static shocks and bitterness."

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    Hello friends,

    "Love to Hate Me, Hate to Love Me" - this quote reminds me of IEI-ILE (INFp-ENTp) mirage relations, where there is a push-pull effect, because these two types share leading Ni/Ne functions, and yet still do not see completely eye-to-eye, so there is an inexplicable frustration with one another's style of communication, and yet also an appeal in one another's priorities and ways of thinking. Additionally, the IEI hidden agenda is Ti, and the ILE hidden agenda is Fe, both of which occur in the other's leading functions, so both may appear ridiculous to the other in some ways, insofar as both are prone to awkwardness in trying to execute one of the leading functions in the other person, which function they greatly value, and try to fulfil in complete earnestness, and yet are not especially adept in executing. The IEI wants to understand everything, and yet can appear awkward in attempts to systematise everything in concepts, whereas the ILE wants to gain acceptance and achieve social cohesion for everyone, even while not knowing exactly how to bring this about.

    I am open to any thoughts on this! Please ask me if you want to further explain what I have been trying to express here.

    Hope the rest of this conversation is constructive for everyone.

    Thanks friends!

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    Landlord of the Dog and Duck Subteigh's Avatar
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    I think some people at least who have this Attitude would like to think they give the impression of "I don't care what you think...you on the otherhand have already lost by caring enough to voice some opinion hahaha!!!" ...which doesn't work of course because it is clearly an attempt at a shield which shows they do care about such things. If they found out you hate them, you would probably find out about it in some way.

    Having this in pink with hearts and fancy writing and on facebook probably is type related...but I'd say it would be more beneficial to look at how this form of expression and display would differ via type (and things like temperament and introversion etc.)

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    Vomit. There is a little bit of that each time I see somebody post similar images on Facebook.

    Knew one person who posted something similar on a near-daily basis, and I suppose it's understandable that you want to be seen as your own person, doing your own thing, able to love yourself, etc., but if you feel the need to say such stuff on a regular basis, it really seems as if you're trying to convince yourself. In other words, a part of me believes it shows a lack of personal confidence.

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    Haikus
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    what. I don't think it's type-related ...just childish and attention-whorish. But if it were, it would be EIE-ish.

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