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Thread: Amanda Todd's Story

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    Default Amanda Todd's Story

    R.I.P. Amanda Todd



    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_of_Amanda_Todd

    This is a pretty horrible story that was significantly worsened by social media. I'm curious to hear your thoughts on this.
    "Nothing happens until the pain of staying the same outweighs the pain of change."

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    Maybe I do, it's a pretty big story in Canada so it's hard to ignore. It only gets me as upset as I imagine it does for anyone else who looked into the story.
    Last edited by Raver; 01-04-2013 at 11:21 PM. Reason: Requested
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    So sad, unfortunately this is the huge problem being faced now, I don't think outlawing or harsh sentences for cyber bullying is the answer but maybe more sensitivity to this... if she had one adult influence that cared maybe they could have changed things for her, such as a teacher, parent, or mentor that could have explained to her that the attention she was getting wasn't really her fault but just a consequence of the imperfections of other people -- the guy wanted to have sex and the girl being threatened by that. If she had someone invest the effort into her she may have come out stronger in the end for having dealt with these imperfections as a victim. It's relatively simple but schools are full of inept politically correct teachers and much of the system keeps bad teachers in positions and prevents real genuine talent from rising to the top. It's not really worth blaming the parents, but they are probably very clueless to this sort of dynamic and don't fully understand it. There are several issues being faced by the youth this being one of them -- but its a relatively simple solution, just a little bit of investment or setting them on the right course is enough to radically change things in the long run, all people really need is a bit of shock to their system to re-vitalize their lives and turn a nightmare into something positive.

     
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHw5r2yODKI&feature=related

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    I saw this a few days back. It's sad.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    I wish she would have taken out her anger on those other people and not herself. Violence can be good when it is for the sake of justice and not blood-lust. There's something to be said for school shootings and such that is positive.

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    ^....what?

    wth

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tackk View Post
    I wish she would have taken out her anger on those other people and not herself. Violence can be good when it is for the sake of justice and not blood-lust.
    I liked the post because of that part (I only read this first part when I clicked). Sure, it's easy to say the moral thing "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind"-stuff, but it's not that simple. If someone makes you want to kill yourself, if they keep making your life a hell without any good reason, why not fire back? It's natural.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tackk View Post
    There's something to be said for school shootings and such that is positive.
    I don't support that because school shootings usually involve many people who have nothing to do with the individual's situation. Killing others because someone hates "society" is total bullshit. You either get the ones who are responsible or nobody.
    „Man can do what he wants but he cannot want what he wants.“
    – Arthur Schopenhauer

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pa3s View Post
    I don't support that because school shootings usually involve many people who have nothing to do with the individual's situation. Killing others because someone hates "society" is total bullshit. You either get the ones who are responsible or nobody.
    That's basically why I could never do such a thing, but there are other complications/considerations.
    A lot of people turn a blind eye to what they see and then pretend they are innocent. Sometimes this can even be solely ignorance, wherein someone supports a corrupt institution because it gives them a high quality of life, while ignoring the problems it creates. Now I'm not necessarily agreeing with that stance, but there is truth to it.
    Last edited by strangeling; 10-15-2012 at 03:44 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    ^....what?

    wth
    Yes?

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    No doubt she was angry, but with no proper tools to fight back, little wonder she turned her anger inward. Part of the point of getting angry is to learn what to do with that anger, not just to act out randomly but to bring oversight and justice to a situation like this one. But it appears that Amanda Todd and her family, counselors, etc., did not have, or did not believe they had, a suitable legal channel for action against these bullies. It sucks that it took her death for the matter to be addressed by the police and for the need for cyber-bullying laws to be discussed.

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    Tackk, do you need a hug?

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    Lol yea I don't support school shootings but the problem could easily be solved if someone (like another student, not an adult) just singled out the aggressor that was pushing and hitting her and then kicked their ass -- I promise all the other tag alongs would just break apart and flee if they were forceful enough.

    But really I'm wondering why the school didn't come down on the kids in that little posse like a ton of bricks. I mean hopefully its not typical for posses of like 15 students to gang up on one kid while powerless teachers stand around idle because they are afraid if they intervene they'll get a shitstorm of backlash from butthurt parents -- well fuck you, raise kids that aren't little shits.

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    People get told bad advice about bullies, I remember eating dinner with my loveable but-highly-stupid-sometimes middle class family and I was trying to explain to them how I was being mistreated, to see if they had good solutions for it and they said 'just ignore them.' I tried that and it only made things worse, they bullied me where I had no choice but to respond emotionally. When you start harassing people physically, you can't help but feel it even if you are a tough, well-together person. I could take the taunts and verbal sparrings most of the time but when they kicked the back of my shoes and threw stuff at me when I wasn't looking... I remember feeling like that defeated sigh. My parents were just so naive and Nickelodeon-ish, I seriously hate them for a lot of the stuff they did. I know they meant well but seriously fuck them for being so naive!!!!

    I really wish I had like a person say to me "Sam you have to be strong and just kick their ass." (But I did end up having that of course. I had myself. Oprah goes oooh and claps , turning my self-confidence into her own narcissism.) I also told psychologists and social workers about it and they blamed *the entire problem on me*. They seemed to secretly side with the boys who were tormenting me. I felt like nobody was on my side in life but this caring girl named Robin who liked Sailor moon and acted a lot like @dolphin. =p (AWWWW) it took me living in a more liberal, nicer area to realize that not everybody was a monster.

    But I learned it on my own that you have to be violent towards bullies, and one day I got fed up and I pushed the guy down. I was surprised at how soft he was physically. Like, he was seriously super 'faggy' and I was the tough strong alpha male straight man! I then noticed that the cute good looking jocks never gave me a hard time they instead played with me flirtatiously, so I don't like the media always portraying jocks in a bad light. If you're strong you wouldn't need to pick on somebody weaker. But I was always just in the middle, I was always stronger than a bully (who while emotionally abusive they have the physical touch of a gnat) but not as strong as the narcissistic hollywood jock who I got crushes on. If anybody is torturing you emotionally they are secretly scared of you, it's just fact. (and I'll admit that I myself have cruelly taunted people because I felt unsafe around them in ways.)

    A lot of people who work for the system are really insecure people who often actually enjoy picking on people. I've heard so many cruel comments from teaches and social workers, also I noticed if an individual was trying to make themselves happy personally - a stupid PC teacher like @HaveLucidDreamz was talking about would purposefully go out of their way to do something to make the kid feel bad. Honestly the problem is authority. I felt sorry for the boys who bullied me cuz ultimately they had less caring parents than I did and were from poorer families. But people in real positions in power often encourage all sorts of bullying behaviors because in a large-scale social group, people want to compete, they don't behave well, and snuffing out people's personal happiness is often encouraged. Cheering people on was discouraged unless it was done in this corny overly politically correct way that came across more sociopathic than something actually inspiring. Basically society just needs to burn all public schools, everywhere, I mean look at all the gay boys that killed themselves because of the LIES they were told. I felt like before going to high schools the world over and personally standing up for gay kids who are being tormented. cuz im a strong alpha gay male now.

    <3

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    Having a job like social worker or working for kids, can make the people in authority mean/angry even when most of the time they are nice and normal human beings with their own intricate shades of gray. It's just the system has a tendency to erode the natural sweetness that people have.

    I just read something that I found so helpful. Psychologists have discovered it's not 'self-confidence' that makes people happy, it's self-compassion. Confidence has an aura of smugness and a hidden, cover-up victim mentality where you think other people will always hurt and fight u. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there for the 'self-confident' person and what if they are the lesser dog?

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    i remember seeing one of her videos before she killed herself, before she went viral. imagine my surprise when i learned she's made the headlines.

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    Suicide is for pussies.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gravolez View Post
    Suicide is for pussies.
    It actually takes balls to do it, and it takes more balls to keep going.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I just read something that I found so helpful. Psychologists have discovered it's not 'self-confidence' that makes people happy, it's self-compassion.
    A good book on this topic is Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach.

    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/055...SIN=0553380990

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tackk View Post
    A lot of people turn a blind eye to what they see and then pretend they are innocent. Sometimes this can even be solely ignorance, wherein someone supports a corrupt institution because it gives them a high quality of life, while ignoring the problems it creates.
    Of course, but this leads us to a range of new consideration where it's hard to draw a line. If my children starve to death even though I have enough to feed myself and them as well, I am most likely guilty. If my brother (an accountable adult who is able to work) starves to death even if I have enough, people would still think I'm guilty of not helping him. But what about some guy in my city I don't know? Or think about the people all around the world who starve.

    I could say that I feel guilty for all of them, because I did nothing to help them. On the other handside, I did nothing wrong, either. I just lived my life.
    „Man can do what he wants but he cannot want what he wants.“
    – Arthur Schopenhauer

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    of course theres group think and the desire to fit in and scapegoating and these things happen but at some point don't most people bump into a wall inside themselves where they think "wow this is too far?" do some people not have that wall? the fact that even after her death there are still people celebrating, i don't understand how a sane person can be that lacking in limits. i guess they really must have thought that what she did was so horrible she deserved it, but that's bizarre.

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    do some people not have that wall?
    They really don't. Or they are picking on her to fit in.

    i guess they really must have thought that what she did was so horrible she deserved it, but that's bizarre.
    They sensed she was a naturally sweet and big-hearted person who naturally feels things deeply, so they couldn't help but push. I'm similar in ways, although looking into her eyes I don't have it as bad as her. Reminds me of the white trash side of my family hunting deer and then smiling to themselves in self-satisfaction. It's not the hunting that is creepy, it's people taking so much satisfaction on picking somebody who is weaker than they. As Andrew said on Buffy once, "People suck."

    If you are a compassionate, empathetic person in this society who cares about feelings, I think it's wise advice to just stay away from groups as possible while focusing on connecting to the few people who understand and love you. Do whatever you can do to get away, even it means breaking the law. I had to break many laws and be 'illegal' for my own mental health and sanity because my real life bullying was so bad. Protecting my own soul is more important than following some fake laws of conduct that sociopaths naturally avoid anyway. I sensed that they realistically wanted me to actually kill myself in front of them and then if I did they would most likely high five each other. I don't think bullying should be a crime because that's too communist and strips away freedom, i'd much rather empower people with tools on how to help themselves if they are naturally sweet and 'faggy' because one cannot help their temperament.

    i've noticed it really helps bullied kids if you teach them that life is about independently exploring, that they don't need to always share or be connected to others so much. Because you can't really trust people, especially those in power who are pretending to protect people but really they are doing it for their own selfish needs. a lot of bullied people are people who really know how good it feels to be truly understood and loved by other people, because we feel the compassion as much as we do the cruelty. If you don't view other people as co-dependents so often (although you can still be your loveable self at times) it puts the power back to your own hands.

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    Some more detailed information from here:

    In September of this year, a 15-year-old girl named Amanda Todd from British Columbia posted a video onto Youtube in which she detailed a terribly fucked up story with Bob Dylan-esque cue cards, of how one internet pedophile had deliberately destroyed her happiness. You can get all of the painful details from the video, but basically she flashed a strange guy while she was in the seventh grade over webcam. That image got into the hands of a pedophile who tracked her through high school, then leaked the images to her friends and family, while continuing to stalk her online and heavily disrupt her life. Some of the Canadian mainstream media have described it as “bullying... through online social media” but clearly this pattern of controlling and destructive behavior is more than just a case of “no one likes you” wall posts and “you’re fat” instant messages.

    In light of the recent exposure of Reddit’s most notorious jailbait administrating troll by Gawker, and the news of Hunter Moore’s disgusting little empire embarking on a new online endeavor, it seems like all eyes are uncomfortably on the jailbait exploitation community on the internet. While jailbait certainly has a more palatable ring to it than child porn, it has clearly become a very insidious force on the internet that is pitting overly clever pedophiles against insecure teenagers.

    Unfortunately the Amanda Todd story gets worse, as her exploitation did not end at death. After autopsy photos of Amanda, naked and deceased, leaked onto the internet, the hacktivist group Anonymous responded. Anonymous claimed that a teenager named Alex Ramos distributed the photos, and proceeded to bomb his Twitter account. In what was publicly available on Alex’s Twitter timeline yesterday night, he insisted that what he found was simply available over Google Images. The biography of his Twitter account has now been hacked to say “Raging faggot that loves posting nudes of a dead suicide victim.”

    Anonymous has also, supposedly, uncovered the identity of the pedophile that tracked and blackmailed Amanda. In a document they leaked to the text file sharing service Pastebin, they allege that the pedophile’s name is Kody Maxson of New Westminister, British Columbia. To back up their claims, they linked to a Facebook picture that’s protected (so that’s no help) and a quote from an account tied to Kody Maxson on a jailbait forum, where he posted images of nude teenagers and made it known he was blackmailing underage girls.

    In what can best be described as extremely bad taste, Hunter Moore has thrown a handful of horrible tweets into the Amanda Todd discussion. Hunter, the creator of IsAnyoneUp, a now defunct website that allowed guys to post photos of their naked ex-girlfriends with public links to their Facebook profiles, is an online architect that has helped people like Kody Maxson reach girls like Amanda Todd.

    After tweeting shit like “I wonder if Amanda Todd will be on walking dead tonight” and “Life’s a Bleach - Amanda Todd” which is a reference to Amanda’s first bleach drinking suicide attempt (it’s not clear if this is how she committed suicide on the 10th), he was met with the usual torrent of hatred and disgust that the man has grown accustomed to. In response to the backlash, Hunter tweeted: “i lost 200 followers from my amanda todd joke. then gained 250 from making fun of a girl for wanting me to take her buttonhole virginity. <3.”

    While Amanda described being bullied by her classmates in the original Youtube video she posted, the pedophile that stalked her through high school is clearly the reason her torment began and continued to worsen. While this story is receiving a lot of attention in the media, the Canadian press has so far failed to properly illuminate the role of popular jailbait image boards and the horribly destructive control that one lone creep, hiding behind his computer, had over Amanda’s life. Luckily, the RCMP has a 20 to 25 man task force working on this, as they told the National Post, so at least they seem to know what’s up.

    Hopefully, the popularization of Hunter Moore and sites like IsAnyoneUp can be reconsidered after a tragedy like this, and that the catch-all of “online bullying” becomes examined under a more complicated lens. The vigilante justice of Anonymous is simply a band-aid on a very serious and quickly growing problem online that is putting vulnerable young girls like Amanda Todd in a very complicated and destructive type of danger.

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    Anon gives me faith in humanity. <3
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pa3s View Post
    Of course, but this leads us to a range of new consideration where it's hard to draw a line. If my children starve to death even though I have enough to feed myself and them as well, I am most likely guilty. If my brother (an accountable adult who is able to work) starves to death even if I have enough, people would still think I'm guilty of not helping him. But what about some guy in my city I don't know? Or think about the people all around the world who starve.

    I could say that I feel guilty for all of them, because I did nothing to help them. On the other handside, I did nothing wrong, either. I just lived my life.
    Very interesting point

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    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    of course theres group think and the desire to fit in and scapegoating and these things happen but at some point don't most people bump into a wall inside themselves where they think "wow this is too far?" do some people not have that wall? the fact that even after her death there are still people celebrating, i don't understand how a sane person can be that lacking in limits. i guess they really must have thought that what she did was so horrible she deserved it, but that's bizarre.
    I believe it, my thought is that celebrating is a way for them not to look at the reality and avoid feeling guilty -- think about it, if you are a morally undisciplined person and you are faced at some subconscious level between the choice and patting yourself on the back and reassuring yourself you did nothing wrong and the person who killed themselves is a horrible person that is weak and the world is better without them or to actual feel somewhat responsible for the death of another human being and feel guilty about it which at first glance is going to be the more desirable option. Only the morally disciplined person would actually put themselves through that kind of guilt and pain (imo) -- its easy as an observer to stand back and look at it and make such an observation but when you're in the shoes of the aggressor you are forced between two options of either believing your malicious actions were justified or having to experience guilt and remorse for your actions.

    I don't know call me an asshole but that's why I partially support the view of giving bullies a taste of their own medicine. For some they will feel guilty and remorseful and destroy themselves over such an action, and I think those types of people need peace to contemplate their actions and an opportunity for atonement, but some people are just lazy fuckers when it comes to morals and they'll bounce back into a state of self-reassurance of being morally justified unless you push them into feeling a little guilty or like shit, the trick is knowing when enough is enough -- I don't condone revenge or anything like that or going too far, but some people are just lazy, you need to light a fire underneath them for them to get it, otherwise they'll just stay in the same state of self-justification and ignorance. It's a difficult issue and there is a reason people avoid it.

    Ghandi and Martin Luther King, I still support that stuff but it's an entirely different situation than this, and the context brings about unique difference from suicide and school bullies.

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I just read something that I found so helpful. Psychologists have discovered it's not 'self-confidence' that makes people happy, it's self-compassion. Confidence has an aura of smugness and a hidden, cover-up victim mentality where you think other people will always hurt and fight u. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there for the 'self-confident' person and what if they are the lesser dog?
    Yea I know what you mean, I don't think people really understand "self-confidence" imo it's a sort of a buzzword that gets thrown around a lot, and a lot of times its more of a fantasy of being invincible or powerful and not really a reality -- its kind of like bolstering your ego up with bravado so much that you aren't hurt -- and most of the time its just a small situational thing that doesn't persist or just wears on your soul if you try to persist it.

    Real confidence I think is like some zen buddhist monk shit, where you can accept reality, like to keep your calm under pressure and focus, and not give into the impulses of feeling weak or insignificant. It's sort of this meditative thing -- and I agree it's not related to "happiness" but rather when I feel actual confidence and not the false kind of bravado it feels more like a calm secure feeling and less like a happy feeling... however I think real confidence in conjunction with self-compassion (or whatever is the source for personal happiness) can be a helpful and constructive combination.

    In reality I think a lot of what people associate as confidence is a reactionary bolstering of their ego as a defense mechanism to insulate themselves from pain.

    As far as real confidence and related things -- I've felt these moods occasionally of amazing calm where I feel just right and in the zone and focused -- its hard to keep it persistent and I've found that this kind of thing actually attracts people to trying to shatter your concentration -- it's the same fucked up logic as you were mentioning about bullies targeting the happy kid. Occasionally when I am in a good mood I can just stare someone down without blinking and without being intimidating and its interesting sometimes I get huge smiles from people and other times people will like look away, and you can get a real sense of another person energy from this. Usually I get smiles a lot from women, sometimes I'll even get some positive vibes from dudes in the kind of "right on" way, and usually I get the most annoyance from huffy d-bags and compulsive surburbanites and business people, it's stereotypical but asian people are pretty meditative as well -- I remember studying on the fourth floor of the library in the evening and it was loaded with asians and was very peaceful, when I've tried studying around valley girl-esque types that frustratedly slam the keyboard and bitch and moan and call their friends and act annoyed about every little detail. I think most people really don't know how to just mentally relax, everything is a torrent of high energy and productivity but its really all overrated because they are out of focus (imo) and they see someone else who is focused and calm and they are just kind of pissed off and annoyed at it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by COMFINED View Post
    A good book on this topic is Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach.

    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/055...SIN=0553380990
    Tara is actually my meditation teacher. She is amazing. She has a very poetic, heart-based approach to this stuff. There's a lot of free stuff on her website. Here are two talks on self-compassion from last year that I really liked. I sent them to dolphin a while back, but she wanted no part of them, lol. Anyway, this woman has helped me through a lot:

    http://www.tarabrach.com/video/2011-...ompassion.html
    http://www.tarabrach.com/video/2011-...ompassion.html

    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    of course theres group think and the desire to fit in and scapegoating and these things happen but at some point don't most people bump into a wall inside themselves where they think "wow this is too far?" do some people not have that wall? the fact that even after her death there are still people celebrating, i don't understand how a sane person can be that lacking in limits. i guess they really must have thought that what she did was so horrible she deserved it, but that's bizarre.
    This is the first I've actually read of this story, but it seems like every day you can find a similar story if you look for it. It's unconscionable to me, too. There is this atavistic contingent of humanity that kind of horrifies me. I don't understand it. My early answer to this question was a little blithe: "America hasn't suffered enough. They haven't lost a loved one to war or famine or poverty. This insulation from misery has contributed to an inability to fully appreciate how harsh life can be." But then I remember people committing horrendous things in third world countries. So that's not the answer. The unsettling truth is that there are people who really don't have that wall. You can understand how people believe in demon possession and invoke Hellfire in the face of some of their fellow human beings. At my darkest periods, I've thought like Tackk. I've wondered if the only answer to solving this riddle weren't a sort of counter-evolution. "Survival of the cruelest" dictates that these tendencies will actually pervade the gene pool. Then I'm horrified at what I just thought, lol. But still part of me wonders if the old school horrors of warfare (much of which had an oddly resigned, belicose chivalry and ethics about it) weren't in some way kinder than lacerating a young girl's soul so much that she turns on herself.

    The only ethical method of co-opting this process natural selection is what BnD is saying: fortify the vulnerable. We can never get rid of the "heart of darkness" but we can prevent people from becoming casualties to these evolutionary throwbacks.
    Last edited by Animal; 10-17-2012 at 01:32 AM.
    "How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
    -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

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    No offense, but I find it hard to be completely sad. Kids are bullied every single day and commit suicide because of it. What makes this one so much more important than the others? Big boobs?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Roro View Post
    No offense, but I find it hard to be completely sad. Kids are bullied every single day and commit suicide because of it. What makes this one so much more important than the others? Big boobs?
    should it not be talked about if she has big boobs? should a more culturally representative bully-victim be chosen for discussion?

    i don't think the point of talking about it is to "feel sad."

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    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    should it not be talked about if she has big boobs? should a more culturally representative bully-victim be chosen for discussion?

    i don't think the point of talking about it is to "feel sad."
    Not saying "feeling sad" was the point of it, but everybody is pointing out how sad it made them, so I stated my own opinion on that.

    Like I said, it's something that happens every single day - why does one get more attention than others? Not saying the bullies were in the right, but she shouldn't have been flashing her boobs and sleeping with peoples boyfriends without realizing there would be consequences to face.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Roro View Post
    Not saying "feeling sad" was the point of it, but everybody is pointing out how sad it made them, so I stated my own opinion on that.

    Like I said, it's something that happens every single day - why does one get more attention than others? Not saying the bullies were in the right, but she shouldn't have been flashing her boobs and sleeping with peoples boyfriends without realizing there would be consequences to face.
    obviously it would be impossible to give them all equal time.

    she was at an age where kids are just starting to express and understand sexuality. so to say she should have known better is comparable, developmentally, to saying a three year old shouldn't wet the bed. maybe she "should" have but thats not really a thoughtful or compassionate judgement. its also pretty irrelevant since the "consequences" were unusually out of proportion and undeserved.

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    I'm glad I was fat and ugly all throughout school. If this happened to me I'd probably would've lost it too. Guys didn't know I existed til I turned about 20 haha.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shayley View Post
    I kind of agree with what you are saying here Roro.
    Yesterday I started writing out a response to this thread but gave up, basically it said that whilst it was really sad what happened to this girl I don't think her case is any more sad than many others, as a large number of us are likely at some stage to go through things which have what seem like devastatingly negative outcomes/consequences that just hurt us/our lives so very badly.
    you are a grown ass woman and you are still alive.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Roro View Post
    No offense, but I find it hard to be completely sad. Kids are bullied every single day and commit suicide because of it. What makes this one so much more important than the others? Big boobs?
    To me it isn't the specific event but the underlying mechanics of it.

    Really when you say something like big boobs then this immediately gets me to think of the entire knight in shinning armor paradigm. The guy tries to help and save the poor girl, and eventually for his heroics he gets to be with her -- such a rehashed theme in all literature and so forth. But in real life it's complete shit. I mean look at her specific case, apparently some guy shows up to her and acts like he cares -- he may have even sincerely believed he did for a while, but when he realized she was an outcast and he wasn't getting any, he changed his mind. She realized he just wanted to fuck her and didn't really care. This is what happens when some guy is just "slaying the dragon" for the princess to get some pussy.

    Women know this too, and its not uncommon for some entitled bitch to solely get by as a useless sack of excrement by dealing out pussy like a prostitute in exchange for services ('slaying the dragon'). Sometimes she doesn't even have to put out, just the mere idea of it is enough psychologically to get men to do stuff for her. With a look she can get some guy interested and do a bunch of stuff for her and the guy gets nothing and he is taught that he didn't do something right when in reality she never even had a connection with him she just wanted something and is using sex for power/influence.

    That's why the knight in the shinning armor is bullshit in reality. So what likely happened is this guy complained to his friends and the local cunt squad of popular women that have an iron hold on the high school pussy market jumped in, some dudes probably got some, and then they all teamed up together like a bunch of social fuckups and then decided to teach this girl who is boss so she wouldn't threaten their market and take away business. 15 people banded together behind one girl, because she's the ceo of the pussy and they are the leeches, and the dudes too..... she's the ringleader... and that's why she should be targeted, because everyone is backing her up because from the dudes perspective they are getting laid as a result of being in favor with her and from the girls perspective they are as well.

    Anyways this entire mechanic is just pure bullshit, I've said it many times on the side of men, and its true with women as well, the highest promoted person is not always the best. It's all politics, power, and sex -- she's a victim of the process, and that's why it disturbs its not because I actually want to get laid -- that would go against the entire cause itself -- it's because of the bullshit behind this process of power manipulation through sex. Fucking is really good for two things, entertainment -- to pass the time before you die or for procreation -- to continue the survival of the species. If people have to die over it, then its obviously not serving either benefit very well and is becoming a liability. Yet some people don't care, they'll stomp over whoever to get their jollies off and for their own survival -- those types of people are just the lowest of the low imo, sex and money and etc -- everyone wants these things, I wish people could just go about meeting their needs in a cooperative way rather than it having to be some dog-eat-dog competition that is unneccesary all the time. I can understand if people are trapped on a mountain and there is only enough food for 3 of the 5 people and 2 must die for the other 3 to survive, but sex isn't like that... jesus christ at least there are prostitutes... no one has to die over the pussy market, or at the very least just go asexual.... but some will just treat others like shit for their own needs.... that's what annoys me about it. It's what has always annoyed me about it and always will annoy me about it, even if I am at some level part of it.

    This girl had to put up with a lot of crap because of the process -- she was isolated and hated on because she threatened the wrong people, she had to deal with the same fears of dying alone and being unworthy but instead of choosing to take those fears out on some innocent victim and make her own nightmares everyone else's she killed herself... she could have been so much stronger if she would have just persisted. I just hope people aren't douches about it and now make horrible laws that are ironclad vengeful policies against bullying that excaberate the problem. But people are dumb so I wouldn't be surprised.
    Last edited by male; 10-17-2012 at 05:04 AM.

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    It's tragic that a young girl committed suicide due to peer pressures. It's tragic that she is not alone and lots of young people also kill themselves for a variety of "normal" growing-up things.

    What is more tragic to me is how parents keep getting a "pass" when this stuff still happens. I mean, really- this girl tried to kill herself, not once, not twice, but three f'ing times before actually succeeding at the deed.

    What is also tragic to me is this girl obviously had no one fighting in her corner... which is so important for young people. Most of us had people in our lives that helped ground us, and as screwed-up as growing up can be, having someone to share in that process can be key.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shayley View Post
    So...what's your point...are you forgetting all the other stories out there.

    Here are few that immediately come to mind of people I have known:
    *The 9 year old who was sexually abused by her own father and was unable to tell anyone about it for fear that her mother would not be able to care for her brothers and sisters without the father's salary. She went on to attempt suicide many times and look for love from unhealthy men.
    *The pastor's wife who told him that she did not want any children ever because she did not think she would be able to care for them but he insisted on many and she was sent to an institution for many years and attempted suicide with the bedsheets, pills etc many times and slowly revealed the sexual abuse she had been through as a child.
    *The little boy who was groomed to be a sick man's plaything who then lived a life of drugs and alcohol whilst moving through many partners.
    *The 2 little girls aged 2 & 4 who were left alone for a week in a house whilst their mother drugged up with her bikie gang friends. They survived on milk that the milkman left at the letterbox each evening and were found by neighbours playing with pills and smashed glass milk bottles.

    To take your life is a choice, its a decision that many choose not to attempt.

    It's sad that this society hurts people but we do.
    my point is that just because you can make a list doesn't mean each individual story doesn't matter. which I think you'd agree with. so why object to one story on the basis that it leaves out the rest? you're listing those four and leaving out millions more. so the objection of "she's not the only one" is obviously not the real issue.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Finale View Post
    It's tragic that a young girl committed suicide due to peer pressures. It's tragic that she is not alone and lots of young people also kill themselves for a variety of "normal" growing-up things.

    What is more tragic to me is how parents keep getting a "pass" when this stuff still happens. I mean, really- this girl tried to kill herself, not once, not twice, but three f'ing times before actually succeeding at the deed.

    What is also tragic to me is this girl obviously had no one fighting in her corner... which is so important for young people. Most of us had people in our lives that helped ground us, and as screwed-up as growing up can be, having someone to share in that process can be key.
    I do wonder about the parents but it sounds like they moved several times to get her away from it and had her in therapy so I don't get the impression they were negligent. maybe they should have found the people who harassed her and hit her and delivered their own discipline. maybe they should have had her institutionalized and kept away from sharp objects. but its easy to say what-if in retrospect.

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    I don,t think the point of this thread nor its responses even suggested that this story was sadder than the millions ofother stories out there.

    Why did this girl's story get told when so many haven't?? Because SHE told it...to the world! She put it out there, which helped pull back the curtains of many people's minds about how these kinds of things can impact someone. It shows the world that these things exist...that people can do cruel things, and that the internet comes with a revisional set of problems to be considered and dealt with.

    Some people tell their story, not to gain sympathy, but to help others who've been through similar.
    Some people tell their story as a signal that they want...need...are desperate...for help.
    Some people tell their story to gain sympathies and other possible benefits.
    Some people hide their story out of fear of being ridiculed or shamed.
    Some people hide their story because it 'brings down the emotion/mood' of the listener.
    Etc etc.

    The telling and sharing and linking of this story isn't because her story is sadder...it acts as a red flag.
    You may not want to see or hear the red flag...you may even consider it an orange or yellow flag...but it's currently one of many flags waving. It may not even be a flag for you...but would you really burn it so that others don't see/get it?
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    Once again Anndelise you write so very well .

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    Anyhow, with that said, based on the video, I don't think this girl was a passive recipient.

    But I do think she might have been messed up even before the boob flashing. The video went into depth on the flattering comments given prior to the suggestion to flash. Combine that with her later story of being in contact with a guy who had been one of her previous tormentors and how eager she was to TRAVEL to have sex with him knowing full well that he's already got a girlfriend that he is willing to cheat on. As well as her saying that HE hooked up with her...not "I hooked up with him" nor "we hooked up". Even when she went out of her way to cheat with a guy...she phrased it as if she was a victim of it. If he had raped her, the wording would make sense. But...then again, maybe she meant that but was using a slight of phrase.

    I also am having a difficult time seeing her just standing there, no response, no trying to protect herself, no trying to fight back verbally nor physically. But I suppose there are rag dolls out there that do just that.

    I wish I had more of the story. But I don't, nor would it really matter if I did..(it wouldn't change what happened.)

    I do, also, find it disturbing how easily teens resort to drastic measures of suicide, or threats of suicide, often, it seems, before being willing to do anything constructive ...like...not getting a facebook account, seeking adult help, nor seeking the safety of a more public venue, etc.
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