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Thread: Conflictors = smoke and pebbles

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    Anna1921's Avatar
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    Default Conflictors = smoke and pebbles

    Being around your conflictor for a long time is, in the best of times, "fine." Or it seems that way -- you don't notice any major suffering so long as you're both trying to get along (and it should be noted that ime each person believes he/she is trying way harder to bend to the others' ways). It's just life as you know it...

    But after being away from your conflictor for a while, you feel much better. It's like moving from a smoky room into a wooded forest where the air is fresh and clean and refreshing. Or like walking and experiencing, for the first time, ease and comfort in each step... it seems that there used to be pebbles inside your shoes, but now they're gone and you can move fluidly and comfortably. So there you go, breathing fresh air and walking on cushioned soles, and it isn't until you're faced with re-entering the smoky room and re-inserting the pebbles in your shoes that you realize how awful those things were -- how they will instantly cause you discomfort and how they are to be avoided at all costs. But you do (or I did, by accident tonight), and now the smoke burns and the pebbles cut your feet. It's awful, and now that you understand the cause and have experienced relief, it is all but unbearable where it was "just life" before.

    Interestingly, you don't fully appreciate the bliss of the fresh air and pebble-free shoes until you're once again interacting with your conflictor at close range. So I guess if there's anything positive about the experience it's that, lol -- they make you appreciate their absence.

    It's a painful thing to interact with these two, even when they and I are trying our best to get a long... there's just a disconnect, but also constant inadvertent jabs at each others' weak spots. It's truly awful. Pebbles and smoke.

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    Destroypuppy's Avatar
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    I believe I've worked with conflictor's before, and the arguments just kept getting stronger and louder, I quit my job on the spot while yelling. I don't know if its me who was being melodramatic, but a pebble might be something less then conflictor.

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    It's really frustrating with conflictors, there's always some sort of misunderstanding everyday that it's tiring. A lot of times i would get my hopes up when we have a good chat about shallow stuff, and i feel like we have a chance at making things work. But it's all a liee, the closer we get the more we get into fights and the more stubborn we both are. And it DOES feel like "just life"
    Beta NF - E-(6w5), 9w1, 4w5 sp/sx

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    That's only true if you realize you're conflictors.

    Before I learned socionics, I did nothing but fight with other people. I couldn't get along or relate to them at all on any level. I couldn't STAND you unless you were the most holiest and ideals of pure romantic love.

    It really is amazing how far I came. I can realize when I'm being socionically supervised or conflicted with IRL, and I'm much better at protecting my emotions. Seriously before I would act like Glory did on Buffy when she couldn't find her key. If you think my gay rants are annoying NOW- you should have met me seven years ago.

    And yeah I know we all will say 'lol socionics is ghey' on tinychat. But is it? Even though my physical circumstances haven't changed much...and I'm still just Sammy, I felt like I've grown naturally tougher over the years just by enduring and preserving. I don't really need Te. Businesses will come and go, fade and collapse. If I can just make it through, I become naturally stronger. Doesn't matter if I fuck up or I'm not as physically able as a straight male melee class. I WILL SURVIVE.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Anna1921 View Post
    Interestingly, you don't fully appreciate the bliss of the fresh air and pebble-free shoes until you're once again interacting with your conflictor at close range. So I guess if there's anything positive about the experience it's that, lol -- they make you appreciate their absence.
    That's somewhat akin to this relation I have with some person in real life although it can be supervision. Anyway, this person gets all defensive and panicky when I'm present.

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    The thing is, as long as you keep your relating on a shallow, superficial level, it can be okay. Just don't try to get too close.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    The thing is, as long as you keep your relating on a shallow, superficial level, it can be okay. Just don't try to get too close.
    No frigging way I intend to.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    No frigging way I intend to.
    stay away.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    I was having a SLE friend in the past, I would say that while there was an obvious distance beetween us, the relationship was not that bad, even some moment of greatness... We was only "drug friends", we hardly talk about our belief or worked together, that probably hid possible conflict...
    "The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusion."

    -- Maurice Chapelain

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    killer wolf lemontrees's Avatar
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    I just rented a room in a house owned by a LIE woman...

    It was a good price/location; her bedroom is downstairs and her tenants sleep upstairs; and it's furnished and I only need a place for three months. But already when we talk it's like everything we say to each other misfires and causes anxiety. We're both tiptoeing around each other. She's smiling way too (overusing Fe role) and trying too hard to show friendliness by giving helpful Te advice and I'm trying way too hard to seem rational and super organized (but probably doing it in a hyper-Si way). I keep telling myself that as long as I keep the kitchen spotless and pay all my rent on time (easy) that things should be fine...but yeah...

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    not a bumblebee octo's Avatar
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    I find interacting with conflictors awkward, in self-conscious unnatural way, but none of them so far have brought out actual loathing/"please die" feelings in me. Other types though...
    Quote Originally Posted by Agee The Great View Post
    Nobody here...besides me, seems to know what SLE is except for maybe Maritsa.

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