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Thread: Type related, or not? This is kind of redundant but I want fresh answers from everyone

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Default Type related, or not? This is kind of redundant but I want fresh answers from everyone.

    Are these things type related?

    1. How one handles money. For example, I grew up in a middle class home, but barely. My dad was a teacher and my mom stayed home and it felt like there was never enough money for stuff. Thankfully my grandparents helped us out a lot. But what I'm getting at is, do you think the reason one might be careful to make sure there's enough money (not accounting for every penny, just making sure the balance is green) has more to do with one's background? Or type? Or some mix? Or common sense?

    2. Being on time. I know we've discussed this before but I don't remember if there was really a consensus. But I think there's more to it than common courtesy and consideration. I guess everyone likes it when others are on time, and not consistently 10 minutes late. On the other hand, you can get used to that, if you know that's how they are. Do you expect others to be on time, or does it not really matter? I'm not even sure how much this matters to me. I'm trying to figure it out. I'm usually on time unless I really don't care, in which case I'll just show up when and if I feel like it. But I have to be in a nonchalant mood for that to happen. Normally I'm on time, to the minute. (Which is admittedly ridiculous.)

    3. Expecting other people to be decisive. Do you want and expect other people to make their own decisions confidently? Does it bother you when they can't or don't, even if you can't or don't, yourself. Also, once you've made up your mind, how hard is it to change back again? Are you constantly going back and forth, or do you stick to your guns? At what point do you stop looking back and just MAKE THE DECISION. Also, do you get impatient with people for not making a decision? In small things? In big things? Then, once they do make a decision, do you expect them to follow through? Would you get irritated if they changed their mind after having declared a decision contrary to what they ended up doing?

    4. Being demanding about certain things. Having some things that you just won't compromise on. Drawing a line in the sand and saying "nope, I don't want that, I won't even consider it." Is that... bitchiness or determination or rationality or.... what? And what if you're that way about some things but completely opposite about other things?

    5. Does it bother you when people forgot that they told you something? Does it make you feel like they weren't paying attention to you, to the relationship? Does everyone feel irritated by that? I don't even know if I'm irritated all the time, but sometimes I am. And sometimes I'll do the same thing back (!!) to mirror them. I'll start to tell them something (at another time) and then I'll stop and say "did I tell you this already? maybe that was someone else..." almost like a subconscious way to get back at them for repeating themselves with me. That is horrible. I admit it. And this is the first time I've articulated that to anyone.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Perpetual Confusion Machine PistolShrimp's Avatar
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    I'm still new to Socionics, but here's what I think FWIW.

    1) The way someone handles money definitely has to do with the way they were brought up, life experiences etc., but I think type can play a role. I'm terrible with money/finance issues, and think it is due to -PoLR combined with my upbringing by family members who constantly bought useless junk they couldn't afford.

    2) I'm almost always on time, usually ten minutes early. I feel inconsiderate if I make people wait when I said I'd be somewhere at a particular time. I get antsy if I'm late for work, an appointment, or the start of a movie or concert, but once I get there I'm over it. Not a fan of waiting for others, either, but I always bring a book in case I have to wait. Maybe egos care more about this than others? My SEE friend is almost always late, and my ILE guy doesn't really care about being on time, but my IEI friend is usually on time for things.

    3) I can't stand indecisiveness, especially on petty things like where to eat or what to wear. I like when someone says, "Let's do [this]! Let's go [here]! Let's eat [there]!." Then I can choose whether I want to go along or offer my own suggestions instead. I'm naturally somewhat indecisive, but if I'm stuck with indecisive people, I'll tend to step up and call the shots to stop wasting time waffling. If we're going by Reinin, seems like Betas and Gammas are decisive types.

    4) -PoLR? -base? Enneatype 1?

    5) I don't care if someone says something to me twice because they forgot, but if they've told me something multiple times and I don't want to sit through the same boring story again I'll call them out on it. I'm guilty of repeating things myself because my memory is kind of bad, so I have no right to get pissy when others do the same. I don't think this is type related.

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PistolShrimp View Post
    I'm still new to Socionics, but here's what I think FWIW.

    1) The way someone handles money definitely has to do with the way they were brought up, life experiences etc., but I think type can play a role. I'm terrible with money/finance issues, and think it is due to -PoLR combined with my upbringing by family members who constantly bought useless junk they couldn't afford.

    2) I'm almost always on time, usually ten minutes early. I feel inconsiderate if I make people wait when I said I'd be somewhere at a particular time. I get antsy if I'm late for work, an appointment, or the start of a movie or concert, but once I get there I'm over it. Not a fan of waiting for others, either, but I always bring a book in case I have to wait. Maybe egos care more about this than others? My SEE friend is almost always late, and my ILE guy doesn't really care about being on time, but my IEI friend is usually on time for things.
    This sounds exactly like me.

    3) I can't stand indecisiveness, especially on petty things like where to eat or what to wear. I like when someone says, "Let's do [this]! Let's go [here]! Let's eat [there]!." Then I can choose whether I want to go along or offer my own suggestions instead. I'm naturally somewhat indecisive, but if I'm stuck with indecisive people, I'll tend to step up and call the shots to stop wasting time waffling. If we're going by Reinin, seems like Betas and Gammas are decisive types.
    me too.

    Ugh, I think I'm just over-thinking some things right now. Thanks for taking the time to reply!
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    1. Idk but I'm horrible with money. maybe T > F.
    2. I'm usually on time and I expect others to be on time but i'm not anal about it or anything. static > dynamic?
    3.
    a) I don't really care either way. (I > E)
    b) if it doesn't affect me, no (I > E)
    c) extremely hard (Ij > Ep > Ej > Ip)
    d) once i decide to stick with something, i don't change plans unless i've seen it through (j > p)
    e) idk (????)
    f) it can get irritating (yeah)
    g) i expect them to follow through with what they say and would get annoyed if they changed their mind. this has more to do with my own psychological inertia than anything else tho. also static > dynamic, intro > extro.

    4. i cave in easily. maybe Se > Ne, static > dynamic, intro > extro.
    5.
    a) no.
    b) no.
    c) idk
    d) cool


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    1. How one handles money.
    I spend cash as fast I earn it.

    2. Being on time.
    I'm usually 5-10 mins before depending on the urgency.

    3. Expecting other people to be decisive.
    I don't but it can get a bit annoying after, say, an hour has passed and there is no forward at all. Some person once asked me which lighter I want out of many having the same function but differing in image. I grabbed a lighter. Finito.

    I don't have to mention that person was a bit dissatisfied with my choice. I don't know the reason as to why till this day.

    4. Being demanding about certain things.
    I don't know but I think I have this "this is what I need now to get y done" mentality and I'm not afraid to voice it.

    5. Does it bother you when people forgot that they told you something?
    I would just say " I know, you've told me this before."

    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    Are these things type related?
    No idea.

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    1. I've always been more of a saver than spender, and always thought more long-term with my finances. I can't even buy myself a new shirt without beating myself up over it for a while.

    2. I'm always on time, or else call/text to give a heads up if I know I'm going to be late for whatever reason. Other people being late works my nerves.

    3. I prefer others to make quick decisions. I do get rather impatient waiting on others to make a decision, and often I just want to make their decisions for them. As far as my own decisions are concerned - sometimes it can be difficult for me to decide something, but I usually stick to a decision once I've made it.

    4. I can be, but I think I can be open-minded as well. Some things need to be done a certain way, and if it's not being done right it should be let known. I know I could be pretty anal growing up about others putting the dishes away because they would never put them where they were supposed to go; my uncle would put plates in the cabinet with glasses - wtf who does that?

    5. It irritates me when people repeat themselves, and it irritates me more when I have to repeat myself.


    Don't know if they're supposed "type" related, but there.

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    1. I handle money very well for the most part. I easily save up money, I don't spend it on stupid things, but I have this principle too that if I see something that's really worth spending money on it, I will.
    My background is a poor family, often I had no money at all as a kid, there was a time period when I had a little money, really little, and I just intuitively knew how to handle it, spend it only on things I really wanted to have. I simply decided which things were worthy enough spending that little money on and went by that decision. This is still how I operate even though I have more than enough money to spend.

    2. I'm only on time if I determine I should be on time. In those cases I'm on time proper. In other cases, I do not determine I need to be on time and then I will be late by 10-20mins because I don't get myself together fast enough. I am aware that I'm going to be late in those cases though and I don't like it. Some more awareness would help in those cases. I will notify others if I'm going to be late, though.
    I don't "hate" others if they are late, I don't criticize them for it, but it of course is easier if I don't have to wait. I'd say I'm neutral on this topic.
    Once there was this girl though, I was waiting like 1 hour for her, and when this repeated, I had enough and went home without waiting a few more minutes for her; she did arrive there 5 minutes later and I suspected she might be there finally!, but I still went home. In that case I wasn't quite neutral... but I didn't hate her for it, I was just pretty annoyed and got overly impulsive about my decision of going home right there and then.

    3. I don't really care what other people do as long as it doesn't affect me. Their own life. If they fuck it up, their problem.
    If I made up my mind I need a proper argument to change my mind. I make up my mind easily when I'm set on tangible goals. I'm not making decisions all day long though. I can be indecisive when it's not a tangible thing or when it's unclear how to get there... clarifying helps in those cases.
    If someone changes their mind AND it affects me, I would want to know why they changed their mind to see if it makes sense to me. In that case I could be OK with it.

    4. I have some things I will not make a compromise on. Some other things I don't care so much about, in those things I can be convinced with arguments. It also depends on the level of my determination.

    5. No, I don't interpret it as not paying attention to me. Here's my unsolicited opinion: I don't think your passive aggressive way of handling that is constructive. Don't worry about it being "horrible" though. You made a step in recognizing the issue and that means you can confront your own annoyance thus you don't have to release it in such a passive aggressive way. Don't be afraid of being direct with yourself and with other people about this.

    As for type, people here tend to type me as ILE or LIE. (Afraid that may not help much though, because these two have completely different valuations)

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    1. How one handles money. - making sure one has enough is not the same as planning its use, for example one can obsessively hoard or obsessively double check things. Imo this could be type related if you break a subject like this down to the task. How does one budget for a project.. etc
    2. Being on time. In my experience yes this is type related. For example...sometimes it doesn't matter if ive tried very hard to be on time.. ive simply horribly underestimated the amount of time something will take. When completing tasks I become almost entire wrapped up in other aspects of that experience.. like how the task could be more complete or essential...
    3. Expecting other people to be decisive. - Any expectation of others could be type related. You are assuming they should behave a certain way. It depends how far you want to take it. Any type could assume others to decide to answer a question affirmatively or negatively due to social custom.

    4. Being demanding about certain things. Having some things that you just won't compromise on. Drawing a line in the sand and saying "nope, I don't want that, I won't even consider it." Is that... bitchiness or determination or rationality or.... what? And what if you're that way about some things but completely opposite about other things? - IMO this is also type related. Some people assume that there are two possibilities available.. yes you will do something, no you will not, as an answer. However this is different than expecting social customs to be followed.. here you make distinctions of what's possible ("makes sense") or not, not customary or not.

    5. Does it bother you when people forgot that they told you something? Does it make you feel like they weren't paying attention to you, to the relationship? Does everyone feel irritated by that? I don't even know if I'm irritated all the time, but sometimes I am. And sometimes I'll do the same thing back (!!) to mirror them. I'll start to tell them something (at another time) and then I'll stop and say "did I tell you this already? maybe that was someone else..." almost like a subconscious way to get back at them for repeating themselves with me. That is horrible. I admit it. And this is the first time I've articulated that to anyone. - Yes it bothers me when people forget when they told me something, the most frequent case of annoying repeating is when they try to "claim" an idea as their own that i had previously told them. It would render my work.. rational work.. for nought.

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    Cat Lady aixelsyd's Avatar
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    I think a lot of it is upbringing.

    For instance, I was raised to save money and am sort of a penny pincher and even when splurging, if that even makes sense, I keep track of how much I spend so not to exceed a given amount. I know when enough is enough. I like budgeting my finances, keeping good track of how much I have earned, how much has been spent.

    I'm also very punctual and detest tardiness.

    I can't say much about decision making. I can understand how it is to weigh a decision and take time needed to get the facts and make the right one. I do get a bit annoyed, though, when people need a lot of pushing to make a decision about 'small things.' I believe people should have a sense of direction and know when to know what course of action to take.

    Being demanding is not really an issue to me, probably because I myself am very demanding and appreciate it when people know what they want and why and will defend that.

    Most of it feels like it's because this is how my family is, for the most part, and I've conformed to it because I see the pros in this sort of attitude than I see the cons.
    Life's a bitch and she's got me pussy whipped.

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