Is this quasi-identity of benefit?
I wonder if my views on a relationship with a particular type correspond better to quasi-identity or benefit?
I work with a person of this type (a textbook example). She is actually my boss and much older, but I rarely feel that she is on a superior position (she is generally democratic). She treats me better than other coworkers (her extinguishment and illusionary), she is more respectful to me than to them). Until now in the end she always turns to me. I like to hang out with her, we spend a lot of time talking and laughing (tbh, instead of working ^.^) . But in more serious matters I often don't really appreciate her way of thinking and dealing with stuff - it seems uneffective and she often seems fake to me. She is generally warm, a people-person and liked but I find it hard to truly appreciate her due to her passive-agressiveness and being unable to be forward when she has a problem with sb - me or other coworkers (she usually discusses it extensively with sb else, not the one involved, which I find weak and unfair to the one she has a problem with. I'm sure she does it also when she has a problem with me). Sometimes when she tells me sth about another person was a problem and I agree with her point, I just make an open suggestion on my own behalf to this person. She seems to appreciate it and kind of rely on it (which is strange to me that she just enables herself to rely on someone in that instead of trying to achieve sth in this area by herself), although I don't think she would ever admit it because she wants to project an image of a direct, assertive person.
I find her way of thinking in some situations weird and coming out of nowhere, which could be more of a quasi-identical relation, but in the end I often hang out with her, not the other coworkers who don't have that "foreign" effect on me. I have mixed feelings in this relationship - from frustration/anger about her making things more difficult than they could be, through a more neutral feeling of "she is fun but just can't t take her 100% seriously" to mild joy connected with having good times together and feeling grateful for some things she has done for me.
So what do you think? does it sound more like one or the other? *.*