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Thread: How do you know you're in a dual relationship?

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    Default How do you know you're in a dual relationship?

    Proceed to conject please.

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    When you fall in love with someone, they become your dual. Ask Joy. She can confirm this for us.

    I love you Joy, don't kill me.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

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    Well, you have your personality type, right? Generally, you're seeking two functions that pair with your leading and creative functions. For instance, I am Ne/Ti, so I would be "seeking" someone with Si/Fe. When you're in a relationship and your partner has the two functions that you're seeking in the right order, you're in a dual relationship. That is how you know.

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    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxOnStilts View Post
    Well, you have your personality type, right? Generally, you're seeking two functions that pair with your leading and creative functions. For instance, I am Ne/Ti, so I would be "seeking" someone with Si/Fe. When you're in a relationship and your partner has the two functions that you're seeking in the right order, you're in a dual relationship. That is how you know.
    Fox: Hey there, you come here often?
    Kam: I think tonight will be the first time.

    Later that night:

    ^Example of dual interaction
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxOnStilts View Post
    Well, you have your personality type, right? Generally, you're seeking two functions that pair with your leading and creative functions. For instance, I am Ne/Ti, so I would be "seeking" someone with Si/Fe. When you're in a relationship and your partner has the two functions that you're seeking in the right order, you're in a dual relationship. That is how you know.
    lol. How do you know the functions are in the right order, and that you're experiencing them?

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    I dont think it possible to really "know" such a thing, except by correctly identifying your type and theirs.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Two Little Satans View Post
    lol. How do you know the functions are in the right order, and that you're experiencing them?
    I didn't say anything about identifying said functions, just said that if that's where the functions are, then it's a dual relationship.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mediator Kam View Post
    Fox: Hey there, you come here often?
    Kam: I think tonight will be the first time.

    Later that night:

    ^Example of dual interaction

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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxOnStilts View Post
    I didn't say anything about identifying said functions, just said that if that's where the functions are, then it's a dual relationship.
    Ok but the OP was wondering how you know you're in a dual rels.

    But Im not in the mood for serious discussion anyways .

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    When they self-type as such without knowing about socionics, I would guess.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    How do you know you're in a dual relationship?
    once i type them as my dual..i just know

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    You know it by wanting to spend more time and being comfortable with that person.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    You know it by wanting to spend more time and being comfortable with that person.
    If thats the case, I have many types as my dual.

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    when you look back 10 years later and realize it was like a dream?

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    Well I can't type myself and none of you are
    willing/accurate.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Two Little Satans View Post
    If thats the case, I have many types as my dual.
    I'm quite the opposite.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hydrangea View Post
    Well I can't type myself and none of you are willing/accurate.
    I'm sharpening my teeth already.

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    It feels comfortable and I end up talking about stuff that I enjoy/don't mind talking about. It tends to be kinda boring though for the most part, in terms of new things being brought in.

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    I want to cook dinner for him all the time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Lobo View Post
    It feels comfortable and I end up talking about stuff that I enjoy/don't mind talking about. It tends to be kinda boring though for the most part, in terms of new things being brought in.
    Btw, this happens with most LSEs, but not all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mediator Kam View Post
    When you fall in love with someone, they become your dual.
    This is wrong, I just have to point it out. You were probably joking, but still.

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    With a dual, you can be yourself. And you think your duals are "good people".
    ILE "Searcher"
    Socionics: ENTp
    DCNH: Dominant --> perhaps Normalizing
    Enneagram: 7w6 "Enthusiast"
    MBTI: ENTJ "Field Marshall" or ENTP "Inventor"
    Astrological sign: Aquarius

    To learn, read. To know, write. To master, teach.

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    With my husband, I felt very comfortable with him, like I could just be totally myself and say anything I thought, and a sense of trust, like he wouldn't blab everything I told him to anyone. I felt that after barely knowing him at all. I don't know if that was duality or something else.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
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    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hydrangea View Post
    I want to cook dinner for him all the time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    With my husband, I felt very comfortable with him, like I could just be totally myself and say anything I thought, and a sense of trust, like he wouldn't blab everything I told him to anyone. I felt that after barely knowing him at all. I don't know if that was duality or something else.
    i feel like that with many people of different tYpes. but maYBe its drugs
    maybe a saint is just a dead prick with a good publicist
    maybe tommorow's statues are insecure without their foes
    go ask the frog what the scorpion knows

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    Duality isn't really being in love and having all this supposed flow and connection.

    It's more like this person is a good partner/teammate for you in the long run and actually very similar thought process to you with an opposite objective that takes adjusting to. But you need to savor all the years to explore this relationship to it's full potential and realize that something like marriage consists of a variety of objectives in which you need the right balance, like two backs leaning against one another or someone to pull the other from the mud, because it's like real life that takes time like pines in the forest, or growing a city or business, not a story book fantasy where you fall in love within the instant week and have this deep ongoing chemistry.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    With my husband, I felt very comfortable with him, like I could just be totally myself and say anything I thought, and a sense of trust, like he wouldn't blab everything I told him to anyone. I felt that after barely knowing him at all. I don't know if that was duality or something else.
    That doesn't have to do with duality; it's something else, like having a mature person in your life, something else.

    Duality, duality. I provide emotional support to a man who is so pessimistic and gets down on himself easily by reassuring that whatever he's frantic or neurotic about is going to be ok, this calms him down and establishes sense of acceptance of him. He helps me by organizing things and by confining the observable things in life to concepts and logic; he'll tell me why something is that way, etc. This helps me understand things that lurk in my subconscious and those things I have a hard time bringing out from under my thoughts. He gets me to stop thinking about those thoughts that trouble me and cause emotional feelings and obsessions and in that regard he calms my internal emotions; we become a lot alike one another in that I start saying and doing what he would normally say or do and he starts being like me too; one example is that he said to me that he's a lot nicer to people and a lot more likely to see it from their perspective now that he's had me give him other perspectives to look at rather than just jumping to judge people and hold them up to his perfect standards.

    How can you tell if it's duality?

    If what you say is perfectly understood by the other person and what they say is understood by you.
    If what you do is the right thing that needed to be done in that situation.
    If conflicts are easily subdued and disappear over time as you become in sink and you guys just know what the other will do and say at particular times; kinda like telepathy with each other.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Idk. I think duality really is like a fairytale dream. The problem is that other people naturally hate that. Like, nobody really likes when another person is in love because it feels so good. =/ They don't think that person deserves the happiness or something. "We liked you a lot better when you were depressed." it's like considered not good etiquette to talk about your relationships in a work setting because of that. and it's just really hard to trust people with certain emotional information about yourself. lmao.

    I think the trick is more about how to keep a fairytale dream a fairytale dream that only u two can share because if you show the world that, they naturally want to crush it. Kinda like two straight men watching a romantic comedy and gagging. (or something)

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    if you have to ask the question, you're not in one.

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    Quote Originally Posted by felafel View Post
    lol @ labcoat's answer, but i agree. you just know, somehow.
    If that was the case, we wouldve known about socionics before Aushra.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I think the trick is more about how to keep a fairytale dream a fairytale dream that only u two can share because if you show the world that, they naturally want to crush it.
    yeah. This is true, even if it's "just" a friendship. You have this special trust, this way of hashing things (life) out together that the two of you share when you're alone. Sometimes when you're with a crowd of people, it seems to go away but when you come back together again, it's there. And I agree that it's not being in love, it's more that you have the ability to help one another and grow. What poli said too that it takes time and difficulty for it to reach its full potential. The stresses of life highlight the way that the two of you can handle things together. The more time that goes by, the stronger the relationship and the more you've shown that you can help one another. Pretty special.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ekpyrosos View Post
    Mutuality, intelligibility, synergy. It's not complicated.
    Right. the relationship itself is not complicated (although sometimes the circumstances of life surrounding you can be).

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    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    It's more like this person is a good partner/teammate for you in the long run and actually very similar thought process to you with an opposite objective that takes adjusting to.
    That's what I said in one of my threads, but no, no one listens to poor old Absurd.

    Sniff, snuff.

    I'm sulking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    That doesn't have to do with duality; it's something else, like having a mature person in your life, something else.

    Duality, duality. I provide emotional support to a man who is so pessimistic and gets down on himself easily by reassuring that whatever he's frantic or neurotic about is going to be ok, this calms him down and establishes sense of acceptance of him. He helps me by organizing things and by confining the observable things in life to concepts and logic; he'll tell me why something is that way, etc. This helps me understand things that lurk in my subconscious and those things I have a hard time bringing out from under my thoughts. He gets me to stop thinking about those thoughts that trouble me and cause emotional feelings and obsessions and in that regard he calms my internal emotions; we become a lot alike one another in that I start saying and doing what he would normally say or do and he starts being like me too; one example is that he said to me that he's a lot nicer to people and a lot more likely to see it from their perspective now that he's had me give him other perspectives to look at rather than just jumping to judge people and hold them up to his perfect standards.

    How can you tell if it's duality?

    If what you say is perfectly understood by the other person and what they say is understood by you.
    If what you do is the right thing that needed to be done in that situation.
    If conflicts are easily subdued and disappear over time as you become in sink and you guys just know what the other will do and say at particular times; kinda like telepathy with each other.
    awwww..you two going to get married?

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    I thought this was about when you first met someone for some reason. Hmm with my husband, we don't argue or have man issues come up, and if they do they're resolved very quickly (like within a minute or so) without causing any hard feelings.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    we don't argue or have man issues come up, and if they do they're resolved very quickly (like within a minute or so) without causing any hard feelings.
    Experienced something like this before.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    I thought this was about when you first met someone for some reason. Hmm with my husband, we don't argue or have man issues come up, and if they do they're resolved very quickly (like within a minute or so) without causing any hard feelings.
    What are man issues?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hydrangea View Post
    How do you know you're in a dual relationship?
    I know because Maritsa confirms it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxOnStilts View Post
    What are man issues?
    Prostate cancer.

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    Let's say if I should die and my bf had to be in a new relationship, he would know he's in a dual relationship by...

    "She would look like someone who thinks about people the way you [Maritsa] do, is altruistic, caring like you [Maritsa] are who meets his work needs (gives him plenty of space and at the same time cares for him by scheduling action and making sure he gets rest and food) and who's needs I can meet. Support her in her work, pragmatic day to day issues that fluster her, shore her up when she gets frustrated. "

    I am very sensitive; I want to try to help solve some world problems and when I can't I get down on myself, I feel powerless, helpless, and often voice my sadness and my frustration; my boyfriend helps me with laughter, lightening things up, taking the serious mood off the edge with sarcasm and humor.
    Last edited by Beautiful sky; 02-03-2012 at 03:20 AM.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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