Results 1 to 22 of 22

Thread: ISFp helplessness

  1. #1
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default ISFp helplessness

    IxFps (particularly the females) seem to be slaves to their helplessness. this is one of the most irritating things about any of the types on the socion. can someone enlighten me? I MUST be missing something here... seriously....
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  2. #2
    eunice's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    TIM
    Ne-INFj
    Posts
    2,955
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I agree that sometimes isfp females may appear helpless, but it seems that they can't help it either. Actually, I'm quite fine with that. It appears to me that many people I know enjoy helping isfp females 'cos they always look so cute and approachable when they seek your help, and u feel bad when u refuse them. But, I can't say the same for the other types.....haha.....even infps don't have this privilege, from what I observe. :wink:

  3. #3
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    why can't they do it themselves?! helplessness is so irritating.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    1,246
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Helplessness is a great way to get people to help you. Then you don't have to do it. Heh.

    Infp's are like this too.
    Entp
    ILE

  5. #5
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    yeah, I started a thread about that. INFps are different in that they take pleasure in being helpless and feel attractive in their helplessness. ISFps are just plain helpless. Okay, maybe not *all* ISFps. And maybe only some are unhealthy about it. But it's so frustrating!
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  6. #6
    escaping anndelise's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    WA
    TIM
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp
    Posts
    6,338
    Mentioned
    210 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: ISFp helplessness

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    IxFps (particularly the females) seem to be slaves to their helplessness. this is one of the most irritating things about any of the types on the socion. can someone enlighten me? I MUST be missing something here... seriously....
    I personally do not consider IxFps to be helpless. Their focus is just somewhere other than where my focus is. Most of the time they are in their own heads…whether observing trends that are going on or recalling something from the past. When they do deal with the external world, they are using their creative function of Fe, which means that they are attempting to harmonize the environment around them. Some might say that they are attempting to harmonize themselves to their environment, others might say that they are attempting to harmonize their environment to themselves. Being aggressive/assertive directly conflicts with attempts to harmonize. When an IxFp does get aggressive/assertive, it creates internal conflict and some very bad vibes within themselves. However, being a doormat also conflicts with harmony because it lessens their own needs, their own self. So what is an IxFp to do? Find or attract someone else who can not only understand their desire to create harmony, but can also be the one who can direct or be directed in which directions to be assertive, and/or who can/will protect them from falling into the doormat category.

    The fact that they attract people who will be their knight in shining armor (or joan of arc) shows that they are not as helpless as you seem to think. This is, after all, a way of helping themselves.
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp

  7. #7
    Banned
    Join Date
    May 2005
    TIM
    D-LSI-Ti 1w9 sp/sx
    Posts
    11,586
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    No, no, no.

    ISFps do not act helpless.

    Stop saying stupid things, everyone.

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    129
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    No, ISFps aren't helpless.

    Think of it this way. (Anndelise had some good things to say, very good things actually, and I'm going to talk along smiliar lines here.) ISFps like to maintain harmony. If I began acting helpless around someone, I would begin to feel like I was burdening them. Therefore creating disharmony within myself. Not to mention that I would probably be annoying the heck out of the other person and creating disharmony there as well. As an ISFp, I want to avoid this, so I'm not going to knowingly burden people with my problems. Say I do unknowingly burden someone, I would catch on pretty quickly because I would see the difference in the way they were relating to me. I'd be able to read it in their facial expressions, actions, etc. Then, seeing as though I hate disharmony, I would smooth things over and do what I needed to do to get things back on track. Which means stopping that action and not going there again.

    So, no, in general I don't think you could call an ISFp helpess. Maybe under extreme stress or something, but not under normal circumstances.
    ISFp, SiFe, , or SEI....whatever we're calling ourselves these days.

  9. #9

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    USA.
    TIM
    INTj
    Posts
    4,497
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    i agree that ISFps are not helpless. if they are its just in different things than you are helpless in. EDIT: You=universal you

    Generally i think ISFps are strong in sort of practical things of the social variety..

    My mother is ISFp and she often tells me that i am too innocent.

  10. #10
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I guess I'm just frustrated with my ISFp sister who has some mental health issues. She refuses to stand up for herself or confront anyone about anything. I originally intended this thread for INFps, but then it occured to me that my sister does this kind of shit too. Anyways... I'll back off on the ISFps but maintain my frustrated confusion about INFp helplessness.

    The fact that they attract people who will be their knight in shining armor (or joan of arc) shows that they are not as helpless as you seem to think. This is, after all, a way of helping themselves.
    *wrinkles nose* that's like saying that you have a high earning potential because you can marry a rich guy. why can't they just stick up for themselves???
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  11. #11
    Creepy-aurora_faerie

    Default

    ive pretended to be helpless in some situations to get things done for me


    but it always depends on who im pretending to. i mainly do it to family, because i dont care about appearing weak to them or anything


    to friends, i try to do things myself to prove myself maybe. but normally im nervous about it because i never really have to do it myself.

    sometimes i may pull it with strangers

  12. #12
    escaping anndelise's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    WA
    TIM
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp
    Posts
    6,338
    Mentioned
    210 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    I guess I'm just frustrated with my ISFp sister who has some mental health issues. She refuses to stand up for herself or confront anyone about anything. I originally intended this thread for INFps, but then it occured to me that my sister does this kind of shit too. Anyways... I'll back off on the ISFps but maintain my frustrated confusion about INFp helplessness.

    The fact that they attract people who will be their knight in shining armor (or joan of arc) shows that they are not as helpless as you seem to think. This is, after all, a way of helping themselves.
    *wrinkles nose* that's like saying that you have a high earning potential because you can marry a rich guy. why can't they just stick up for themselves???
    Tell me, Joy, do YOU do everything for yourself? You've mentioned that you suck in dealing with finances...
    supported by a statement of having a ... :wink: low... score.
    Is this not a form of financial helplessness?

    You found someone who is not only GOOD at finances, but DESIRES to cover that area of your life. Wouldn't he be considered a knight in shining armor in regards to YOUR finances?

    As for me, my ISFp is MY knight in shinging armor. He's the one who takes care of me. He comes home from his full time production manager job, cooks, washes the dishes, helps me with other stuff around the house, does all the yard work (I've got major allergies!!!!), and helps me regain control of my finances. When I'm too upset to tell the waitress that she got my order wrong, he'll tell her for me. When I'm upset because I didn't get the right change, but I don't want to bother the busy cashier, he'll walk right up and demand their attention. He is far from helpless. (Although in cases of emergency, I can't trust him to react as quickly as me, so in those cases, I'd say he's relatively helpless.)

    My ISFp step-bro....wouldn't get a job to save his life. But when he found out his gf was having his child....he got two jobs to help support her.

    It seems, that when the ones they love need help, ISFps are the first one's there. However, they're so laid back that when it's them who needs the help, they usually let things slide. Being laid back does not equate to helpless.
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp

  13. #13

    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    NiFe
    Posts
    778
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    =)

  14. #14
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm not saying it's *wrong*, just that I don't understand it. I do understand that all types (all people) have strengths and weaknesses. Yeah, I do depend on my partner for some things, like staying on top of day to day matters. I don't think it's sexy though.

    btw, Peter and I just figured out a budget, and it looks like we won't have to buy a multi-family building this year. As long as we stick to a budget, everything should be fine. I'm good with long term financial plans and goals and whatnot... Peter is good at managing cash (his credit score is higher than my mom's and she's an accountant ). Everything's going to be okay. (:
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  15. #15
    Creepy-aurora_faerie

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    I'm not saying it's *wrong*, just that I don't understand it. I do understand that all types (all people) have strengths and weaknesses. Yeah, I do depend on my partner for some things, like staying on top of day to day matters. I don't think it's sexy though.

    btw, Peter and I just figured out a budget, and it looks like we won't have to buy a multi-family building this year. As long as we stick to a budget, everything should be fine. I'm good with long term financial plans and goals and whatnot... Peter is good at managing cash (his credit score is higher than my mom's and she's an accountant ). Everything's going to be okay. (:

    Peter hasn't had credit for as long as your mom has and hasn't had to buy many things....


    Not to burst his bubble...just saying...

  16. #16
    Creepy-Diana

    Default

    .

  17. #17
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    that just makes his high score all that much more impressive. the length of time you've had your accounts in a big factor in credit scoring.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  18. #18
    escaping anndelise's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    WA
    TIM
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp
    Posts
    6,338
    Mentioned
    210 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    that just makes his high score all that much more impressive. the length of time you've had your accounts in a big factor in credit scoring.
    as well as oftenness of usage, right?
    IEE 649 sx/sp cp

  19. #19
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,635
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    types just have the opposite weaknesses. They'll (we'll) prefer to die than to ask anybody to help them live. Therefore, I can't decide which one of the two options is really better. At least IxFps remain alive.

    BTW, about credit scoring:

    Payment History:

    Approximately 35% of a credit score may be based upon payment history. A credit score is negatively impacted if bills are paid late or if there is a history of delinquent payments listed on the credit report, including matters of public record such as bankruptcy, collection accounts, etc.

    Amounts Owed :

    Approximately 30% of a credit score may be based upon amounts owed or other outstanding debt. A credit score can be negatively impacted if the amount owed is close to the credit limit. A low balance on two credit cards may be better than a high balance on one credit card.

    Length of Credit History:

    Approximately 15% of a credit score may be based upon length of credit history. A credit score can be positively impacted the longer that accounts have been open, especially if they are with one financial institution.

    Taking on More Debt:

    Approximately 10% of a credit score may be based upon how much new debt a consumer is incurring. A credit score may be negatively impacted if someone has recently applied for a number of new credit accounts.

    Promotional inquiries usually do not negatively impact a credit score.

    Types of Credit in Use:

    Approximately 10% of a credit score may be based upon the types of credit currently in use by a consumer. A credit score is usually negatively impacted by loans from finance companies.

    When a lender receives a credit score from the credit bureau, there will be reasons included that explain the score. If the lender rejects a request for credit, and the credit score was part of the reason, the reasons help the lender explain why the score was not higher. Credit score reasons are also useful in determining whether or not a credit report contains errors and/or how a consumer’s credit health might be improved.
    Looks like 15 percent is a "big" factor?

    Surely it's statistically extremely significant, but I wouldn't call it big using my criteria, since 65 percent of credit scoring is actually unaffected by the time parameter, unless we take into account the fact that if a person has more tendency to pay his bills late, then on a longer interval of time he/she will be more likely to have a lower scoring. However, the criteria is most likely based on the ratio of (payments on time/payments past time), which automatically adjusts for the lenght of the interval of time without further calculations. This basically proves my point, which was that more than half of the scoring is unaffected by the time factor.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  20. #20
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    types just have the opposite weaknesses. They'll (we'll) prefer to die than to ask anybody to help them live. Therefore, I can't decide which one of the two options is really better. At least IxFps remain alive.
    you just hit the nail on the head
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  21. #21

    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    6,074
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    types just have the opposite weaknesses. They'll (we'll) prefer to die than to ask anybody to help them live. Therefore, I can't decide which one of the two options is really better. At least IxFps remain alive.
    you just hit the nail on the head
    I agree too.

    types, being dynamics, love shaking up the satus quo, doing things their own way even when others tell them differently, and often seem stubborn in having to do everything for themselves.
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

  22. #22
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    perfectly put
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •