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Thread: Types of your Past Romantic Interests

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    Default Types of your Past Romantic Interests

    Please list them. Current ones don't count. I'm wondering what socionics relationships are most common for beginning then failing.

    ESTj
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    Decadent Charlatan Aquagraph's Avatar
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    We'll most of the romantic relationships one has are always failed. Somehow that just sounded logically inconsistent. Good thread though.

    In order: an aggressive bitch, XEI and IEI.
    Besides those official ones there were a lot of IEI's.
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    expired Lotus's Avatar
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    in no particular order: entj, intp, infp. some are multiples, others i haven't typed.

    all ni egos....hmmmm

    i tend to crush on se egos though.
    maybe a saint is just a dead prick with a good publicist
    maybe tommorow's statues are insecure without their foes
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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    Please list them. Current ones don't count. I'm wondering what socionics relationships are most common for beginning then failing.
    Something about this seems off, something to do with biased samples. I can't really verbalize it though.
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    An ILI at rest tends to remain at rest
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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    Okay, so we have:

    dual/illusionary
    dual

    activator
    dual
    benefactor

    semi-dual
    4 beneficiaries
    conflictor
    contrast
    business
    illusionary
    identical

    IC, do you see a bad bias or one I wanted?

    Hm. I hope I can get more submissions to find out whether CiLI is an outlier.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    when you see the booty Galen's Avatar
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    Are you asking for people I've ever been in a relationship with, or also people I've been romantically attracted to? If the former, then Te-INTp; if the latter, then add Ne-ENTp, Si-ISTp, Te-ISTp.
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    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Duality
    Duality
    Activity

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    Main ones were
    SLI-Te
    SLE-Se
    SEE-Se - this relationship only failed romantically
    ESI-Se

    Dated a few others but they were shorter relationships
    EIE or IEI (probably Ni EIE)
    IEI-Fe
    IEI-Ni
    IEI-Ni
    SEE (? Not sure on type)
    LII or ILE.. Probably LII-Ne
    SLE (he was sociopathic)
    There's one more that I dated that maybe should go in the first category but I've never been able to type him... Seemed Ne/Si introverted, and super 6

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    In terms of made-it-to-an-actual-relationship kind of thing, then LII? I've failed to make it even there a couple of other times lol
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    dual: 10.5
    beneficiaries: 6
    illusionary: 5.5
    conflictor: 5
    identical: 4
    activator: 3
    benefactor: 2
    contrast: 2
    kindred: 2
    semi-dual: 1
    business: 1
    quasi: 1
    mirror: 1
    supervisor: 1
    super-ego: 1

    now includes Arsal
    Last edited by Director Abbie; 11-06-2011 at 06:45 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    ESI and ESE, I suppose. And I guess you can count the SEI. I never dated an LSE, but I heard they're dualistic.

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    ■■■■■■ Radio's Avatar
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    First ever romantic interest was Ti-SLE, sometime in high school. It didn't work out.

    After that I've had a string of Beta ST crushes/semi-relationships, in order: Ti-SLE, Se-SLE, Ti-SLE, and the most recent, Se-LSI.


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    ESI, ESI, IEE, ESI
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    I seem to fall for male estp and entp the most.

    i like this one estp so much that i feel incredibly good about myself and powerful when i think of him and us together, it is just this really europhic feeling. however, it sorta clashes with my superego and society expectations....but you really do have to ignore that I guess, because it doesn't matter when it comes to romance. I think of other people criticizing our relationship instead of accepting it, and it makes me so mad. it's not that i care what they think, it's i feel that they would seriously try to split us apart and it makes me so fucking mad and want to fight. i love him so much and he is 'the one' and my soulmate, however the feelings are kinda too overwhelming and I probably will end up with somebody more stable, safe and practical though.

    true soulmate/twin flame/love relationships are so amazing though. but u need to have A LOT OF BALLS to make them work.

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    Why are all of these dual relationships ending? As far as mine go, only two of these were serious. Best to worst:

    IEI
    ILI
    ESI
    LIE
    IEE
    SEE
    ILE/SLE?

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    Why are all of these dual relationships ending?
    They just end like most relationships do.

    Forgot to mention a certain unofficial ESE gf.

    Edit: TWO ESEs
    Last edited by Aquagraph; 11-06-2011 at 01:56 PM.
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    I guess I always assume people always have much better relationships than I do, it feels good to know others fail too, it makes me feel a little more "normal" because I just completely suck at them.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    Why are all of these dual relationships ending? As far as mine go, only two of these were serious. Best to worst:
    2 of them: we were young, one had negative peer pressure, the other left for a relatively faraway city and we didn't hear from each other anymore.

    the IEE: physical attraction wasn't that great.

    another ESI: she had BPD.
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    I have had three long term relationships, two with LIIs, one with an EIE; the EIE is current and definitely my healthiest match to date. I have had lasting flingish things with an LSI, an EIE, and an ESE. Most of my crushes are IEIs or SLEs, sometimes EIEs.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
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    Under cerulean skies...

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    Two IEIs and two IEEs. Most of my crushes are lesbians, I don't know wtf is wrong with my brain
    Know I'm mistyped?


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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post

    now includes Arsal
    oh REALLY???? i didn't know you two had been an item!

    Anyway mine are as follows (all crushes):

    SEI(?not sure) - crushed on him 4th-7th grade, he actually asked me out near the end of 6th grade, I gave him an equivocal response, he backed down.

    ILI vs alpha NT? - 7th grade crush... then found out my sister was also crushing on him But then he turned out not to be so hot. Very dorky, had a lisp.. ick

    SLE vs SEE vs LSE? - 8th-9th grade crush. the guy stood up for me a few times when a lot of people were picking on me. Also sided with me a bunch of times on a bunch of issues in debates. Had an awesome sense of humor. Very athletic, ran cross country. Was an all around friendly, good guy with kindness in his heart. I think it may have been mutual but then i had to switch schools and hardly ever saw him after.

    Next crush--not sure what type he is... some Fi-type. 10th-12th grades, he graduated a year earlier than me (was older). Very very distant, i barely even talked to him. We did a lot of staring though.

    SEE vs LIE vs LSE -- my college crush. I suspect was mutual, but too many NTR factors going against a relationship between us, which i will not go into here.

    Next crush--again i think some Fi-type. Worked with him a lot. Ended up confessing my feelings. Was mutual as a good friendship, but not mutual from a romantic standpoint. Was a little awkward but he let me down very gently. Really nice guy. Feelings faded about a year or so after the letdown.

    ILI - worked with him a lot, he was very good at giving me an example of great Te; I admired him a lot for that as well as for the importance he placed in Fi-related issues towards people we cared for. I could tell sometimes he sort of underappreciated me though, which hurt. And over time, there were a bunch of instances where he seemed extremely selfish to me for not caring about, for example, the fact that I hadn't eaten yet or whether i got a chance to get some sleep (like when we were on overnight shifts and i was working like crazy). He ended up getting set up with a girl by someone we worked with. Was really painful at the time, but now i'm glad it didn't work out between us. Would have been a tough relationship to put up with for me. He eventually married her, they seem happy together, and i'm really happy for them. These days I cant believe i actually found him attractive; he's actually pretty hideous (i'm fb friends with him).

    SLI-Te: the guy i talked about extensively on the forum since i joined the socionics community 2 years ago (Sept/Oct 2009); the reason i came upon the theory of socionics and phenomenon of duality. My feelings have dissipated since i've found another SLI-Te with more in common with me and who treats me better. There's also more potential for a relationship (perhaps because of all the things we have in common).
    Last edited by Suz; 11-06-2011 at 05:16 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cat King Cole View Post
    Two IEIs and two IEEs. Most of my crushes are lesbians, I don't know wtf is wrong with my brain
    I've suffered from the same phenomena. There were some convertables though. Maybe you like challenges?
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    in the order in which they occurred, plus how long they lasted:

    ILE (identical) 1 year
    ESE (activity) 3 years
    ESE (activity) 3 months
    IEI (illusionary) 4 years
    SLE (lookalike) 15 years
    IEI (illusionary) 5 years and still running

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    I've suffered from the same phenomena. There were some convertables though. Maybe you like challenges?
    Hehe, my psychologist friend likes to joke that it's because I'm a little bit unbelievably gay bi. I'm typically attracted to masculine traits in women, things like deep voices, masculine dress and mannerisms, tomboyishness, etc.
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    ESE (mirror) first love, we connected, could talk for hours, but after a year the relationship got boring and routine.
    LSE (supervision) attraction, sensuality, but very difficult to open up and talk about personal things, but it added excitement. Ultimately it became a big problem though. I still feel insecure when we meet. I never knew why I felt that way, now I know.
    IEE (semi-dual) something new, feeling of openness and mental attraction, but ultimately values don't match.
    ESI (quasi) feeling of attraction, that we have something in common, first connection easy, but it turned out that we could never really connect, VERY frustrating.
    SEI (identity) IDENTITY, understanding, but maybe a little boring, my picture of her didn't match with reality, I was expecting something else, something more.
    SEI (identity) She was a little hard to figure out, I don't know...
    ESI (quasi) see above
    SEI see above
    EII (benefit) should never had happened, but we somehow got stuck together, then it ended painfully after 2 months. Feeling that everything was wrong, we stuck together even though there was no connection, strange.
    EII (benefit) another EII, kind of like the one above, but better. It got complicated, like I would have had to analyze hour relationship for hours to explain how I feel, and why we don't match, strange.
    ILE (duality) short glimses of how it really should feel. But impossible to form a longer connection, everything was just about the moments. The way she related to me was too inconsistent. Also very frustrating, because the basic compatibility was very good.
    LSE (supervision) Spontanous, natural attraction. She's very nice. We have sympathy for each other. But when trying to get passed the first attraction and actually get to know each other, it was like hitting a wall. But still nice to see her sometimes. Supervision is very mild from her.
    Last edited by Nowisthetime; 11-06-2011 at 09:40 PM.

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    ISTj
    ESTp
    INFp
    ISFj
    INFj
    ESFj
    ESFp
    Looking for an Archnemesis. Willing applicants contact via PM.

    ENFp - Fi 7w6 sp/sx
    The Ineffable IEI
    The Einstein ENTp

    johari nohari
    http://www.mypersonality.info/ssmall/

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cat King Cole View Post
    I'm typically attracted to masculine traits in women, things like deep voices, masculine dress and mannerisms, tomboyishness, etc.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Simon Ssmall View Post
    ISTj
    ESTp
    INFp
    ISFj
    INFj
    ESFj
    ESFp
    whore!
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    I don't know everyone's type. It's been too long to keep that close of track.

    My first boyfriend was SLI, but my parents broke us up. Ah young love. The second was SEI. There was another SEI in there, and one who was probably LSE, and one whose type I'm not sure of but probably Beta Extravert. He dumped me for an IEI anyway. LOL. (It's been a trillion years so I can laugh now.) Oh there was an IEE. Galen reminds me a lot of him, he even looked a lot like Galen. There was the LIE I was with for a long time just before my husband. I'm sure I'm not remembering everyone, but those were the most serious ones anyway.

    OMG I forgot this guy I dated for a pretty long while in college. Probably Gamma, maybe another LIE.
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    Slippery when wet Simon Ssmall's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    whore!
    I don't seem to be the only one here!
    Looking for an Archnemesis. Willing applicants contact via PM.

    ENFp - Fi 7w6 sp/sx
    The Ineffable IEI
    The Einstein ENTp

    johari nohari
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    Thank you, Blaze and Nowisthetime.

    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    but my parents broke us up.
    Okay, I won't count that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cat King Cole View Post
    Two IEIs and two IEEs.
    I'd love to include you, but there seems to be no consensus on your type!

    Quote Originally Posted by WorkaholicsAnon View Post
    oh REALLY???? i didn't know you two had been an item!
    How many people can determine relationships by looking at a bookmark?


    dual: 19.5
    benefit: 17
    illusionary: 11.5
    identical: 11
    semi-dual: 8.5
    activity: 6.5
    conflict: 6
    supervision: 5
    business: 4.5
    quasi: 4.5
    mirror: 4
    contrast: 3.5
    kindred: 3
    super-ego: 2.5

    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    Why are all of these dual relationships ending?

    ESTj
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    Squishy's Older Sister

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    I didn't even bother to type them, but looks like EII, but I can be wrong. Was either drunk or way not to bothersome.

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    What's with the ".5" ?

    Anyways, the SLE broke up with me because I went to a party without him (though he was invited) and he was in a really pissy mood. There was a lot that happened.. One of his friends told my friend that he cheated on me.. I believed it, because I could remember specific times that he left me to hang out with other girls. He was REALLY unhealthy. A few months after we broke up he became an alcoholic.. I offered to help him through his problems but he pushed me away constantly.

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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenna View Post
    What's with the ".5" ?
    Some people were unsure of types, so I decided to count halves.

    ESTj
    1w2 sp/so 1-2-6
    Brilliand's Younger Sister
    Squishy's Older Sister

    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  35. #35
    Lobo's Avatar
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    ENTp, ESTj, ISTp, ESTj, ESFj. I seem to be leveling out with Si-creatives, lol.

  36. #36

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    I'm INTp-Te.
    Some of the following weren't relationships. I only included non-relationships if there was mutual expression of interest (dates, making out, verbal, etc).
    Red is 'abort'
    Blue is good/in the running.
    Purple is a mixture.

    ESTJ (?) Should have just stayed friends.
    EXFp
    ENFp-Fi Same ENFp-Fi again (We kept going back to each other over and over again, but any relationships were extremely short-lived.)
    ENXx
    (but not ENTJ) I wasn't that attracted to him, honestly.


    Not failed yet but not completely tried out (mutual interest but we haven't gone past several dates or lots of making out, etc, to a relationship, since there are issues like he's dying or moving or thought I rebuffed him, etc blue)
    XXFx reclusive
    ESFp-Fi
    ISFj-Fi
    ESFp
    failed recent trials (dating)--> sx/so of unknown type and an INTj (two who wanted to date me but whom I wasn't interested in much and to whom I explained eventually, once I was sure, that the feelings I was having were of the friend variety)
    Last edited by nanashi; 11-07-2011 at 03:54 AM.
    ENTj-Ni sx/so

  37. #37
    Coldest of the Socion EyeSeeCold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EyeSeeCold View Post
    Something about this seems off, something to do with biased samples. I can't really verbalize it though.
    I figured it out. An ended relationship(though some people are even including crushes?) doesn't necessarily mean it failed, with regards to compatibility.

    It's a biased sample because the types that people put in the "pool of past relationships" may be there for non-Socionical reasons which aren't even being accounted for.
    (i)NTFS

    An ILI at rest tends to remain at rest
    and an ILI in motion is probably not an ILI

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    Socionics Visual Identification(V.I.) Database
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  38. #38
    Samuel the Gabriel H. MisterNi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EyeSeeCold View Post
    I figured it out. An ended relationship(though some people are even including crushes?) doesn't necessarily mean it failed, with regards to compatibility.

    It's a biased sample because the types that people put in the "pool of past relationships" may be there for non-Socionical reasons which aren't even being accounted for.
    I agree and there were a few people who mentioned that they have dated their dual in the past only to have it end or "failed" as Abbie states it. I think a survey such as this would be a good quantitative look as to exactly how strong the Socionics forces of attraction are between two people. By the looks of it, it seems Socionics is just one attraction force among many other that aren't being accounted for so you're right about that.

    IEE Ne Creative Type

    Some and role lovin too. () I too...
    !!!!!!

  39. #39
    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    dual: 22.5
    benefit: 17
    illusionary: 13.5
    identical: 11
    activity: 9.5
    semi-dual: 8.5
    quasi: 7.5
    supervision: 7
    conflict: 6
    mirror: 5
    business: 4.5
    contrast: 3.5
    kindred: 3
    super-ego: 2.5

    Untitled.jpg

    Btw, I have included two of my own. A mutual-interest dual from 7th grade and a supervisor I was attracted to in high school.

    Quote Originally Posted by EyeSeeCold View Post
    It's a biased sample because the types that people put in the "pool of past relationships" may be there for non-Socionical reasons which aren't even being accounted for.
    Reasons which theorizing on socionics by itself will always ignore. I'm after real-life stats relating to attraction.

    ESTj
    1w2 sp/so 1-2-6
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    Squishy's Older Sister

    Johari Nohari

    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  40. #40
    Coldest of the Socion EyeSeeCold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post


    Reasons which theorizing on socionics by itself will always ignore. I'm after real-life stats relating to attraction.
     

    Right, but how many people have been attracted to types/people they never had a chance to enter a relationship with?

    How many people have had relationships with attractive types/people but had to end them for other reasons than compatibility?


    Especially the first. This thread assumes people enter relationships with attractive people at every chance they get, and that there are chances to choose which type, in the first place.


    Say I put up 2xSEI, 2xLIE. Maybe those were the only people/types in my area or wherever I met them, that I had access to. I had to move to a new city everytime I started to develop a relationship, so all of them were ended by default. That has nothing to do with compatibility failure on account of Socionics type.

    What the thread does measure though is typological success in starting a relationship(excluding the crushes).


    Attraction starts relationships. That may be type related.

    Relationships end. That may be type related.

    Attraction starts relationships that end. That may be type related.


    You want to collect data on which relations are most common for beginning then failing. If you got the data you asked for, that is, people's past types, what you would be looking at is what relationships did a bunch of people at the16types.info have in the past.

    If you looked at the most common relations in the data, you would see the most common relations that people here engaged in. You would not see which relations are the most failure-inclined.

    In order to measure which relations are the most failure-inclined, every person submitting data has to have been in a relationship with all sociotypes. Otherwise the data is skewed towards the types available for relationships, which is not type-related.



    I feel like I'm being an ass in your thread which I don't like and don't intend so I'm trying to be as constructive and to the point as possible.
    Last edited by EyeSeeCold; 11-07-2011 at 06:28 AM.
    (i)NTFS

    An ILI at rest tends to remain at rest
    and an ILI in motion is probably not an ILI

    31.9FM KICE Radio ♫ *56K Warning*
    My work on Inert/Contact subtypes

    Socionics Visual Identification(V.I.) Database
    Socionics Tests Database
    Comprehensive List of Socionics Sites


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