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Thread: Are you responsible for helping others deal with their problems?

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    Default Are you responsible for helping others deal with their problems?

    The way I see it, I can only expect to get others' help with my problems if I am willing to help them with theirs.

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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg View Post
    Are you responsible for helping others deal with their problems?
    Only in three types of circumstances.

    1: They ask me to and I agree to.

    2: I am responsible for them.

    3: I am responsible for their problems.

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    Am I responsible as a moral imperative? I don't think so.

    If they ask? I think it's ethical to help out where possible.

    Do they ever ask? Can't think of a recent case, really; most people seem to prefer enabling sympathy. I suppose that fits the letter of the OP, but not the spirit in which I interpret it.
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    It doesn't really work like that.

    I had a good social worker. She just listened and didn't judge, and gave good non-judgmental advice. She also didn't sociopathically make fun of me for my problems and she showed a lot of empathy. That's what any therapist should do.

    Just knowing there are a few people that have empathy for me and aren't out to get me makes me feel relieved. I always feel like the world is out to get me sometimes and I feel like too much I'll be stuck being the empathetic one all the time, which naturally makes anybody feel like a pussy. Instead of understanding and loving, most people just make me fight. Either them or something else. It's nice when you meet one of those rare souls that is actually a healer.

    But during the time I didn't expect that she would open up to me (and she didn't) because that's not really what our roles were. I was going to her for help and support, she wasn't going to me for that way.

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    no. it might be really shitty to blow people off in some circumstances but ultimately its not your responsibility in an absolute kind of way.

    thinking that way is a good way to create bad situations for yourself and drive yourself crazy. and expecting help from everyone you've ever helped is a horrible idea because not everyone has the same values and people have mismatched views of the same relationship and how much energy has been spent by either party and everything.

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