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Thread: Any experience with INTj extinguishment relation with ENTj??

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    Local Hero Saberstorm's Avatar
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    Default Any experience with INTj extinguishment relation with ENTj??

    Does anybody have any experience with the "Extinguishment" relation between an INTj and an ENTj?

    I think some of the higher-ups at my place of work are ENTjs. I am wanting to start working my way up the ladder and I think I will soon be dealing with at least two Gammas, one I think is a Fi/Se guy, and the other a Te/Ni woman.

    The Fi/Se guy I can bypass. The SuperEgo relation is irrelevant to me. But I will need to work closely with the possible Gamma Te/Ni woman.

    Have any of you ENTjs worked with an INTj? What did the "extinguishment" relation feel like? Would you notice "extinguishment" early in the relationship? Could you sense "extinguishment" in early meetings, like group conferences? Could you sense it during job interviews?

    How can I deal with the extinguishment relation? How did you address it?

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    Local Hero Saberstorm's Avatar
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    FROM WIKISOCION:

    "Relations of extinguishment are characterized by an interest in the same kinds of things, but partners approach it in a fundamentally different and often incomprehensible way. Many people note a certain draw in these relations, as if the other person possessed some dual-like qualities, but never materializes into a dual. In trying to close the distance and get to know the other person closely, partners are very often frustrated and thwarted in their attempts by the other person's unexpected and out-of-sync reactions. Partners in these relations find it very hard to maintain an organized and stable relationship, due to the promising, yet continually frustrating interpersonal dynamic.

    Where these relations can become especially unstable is in the case of a third person/party being involved in the relation. What happens is both Contrary partners attempt to exude their strong sides, which are in opposition to each others' strengths.

    In many cases the introvert partner becomes cautious and distant in formal interaction, whereas the extrovert partner becomes especially vulnerable, taking careful notice of his/her own actions, and thus becoming highly suspicious about the entire relation. This disoriented sense of communication tends to build more and more as Contrary partners continue to interact together."

    Can anybody show me this as a personal case study? How do I fullfill the "promise" of the relationship without the "frustration?"

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    Make the other person aware of the relation itself by introducing them to socionics. That way you and they can fight it together. ENTJs will pretty much take this thing for granted... your partner may already know their type, for that matter. Beating any negative relation involves recognizing the dynamic as it happens, doing a freeze-frame, and changing course to defeat it. Be advised that when you counter a type relation -- thus extinguishing it by force of will -- any remaining unconscious relationships you have with them will come to the fore. Also be advised that the relationship cannot really be stopped... ultimately you are different people and after a period of struggle and even negative projecting, you'll be coming to that conclusion.

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    Samuel the Gabriel H. MisterNi's Avatar
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    From what I can recall about various ENTj commenting on relationships with INTj, a professional relationship can be perfectly fine but personal relationships, not so much.

    IEE Ne Creative Type

    Some and role lovin too. () I too...
    !!!!!!

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