Results 1 to 25 of 25

Thread: Ti + Fe example

  1. #1
    peteronfireee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    TIM
    LSI
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    26 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Ti + Fe example.

    I've noticed that I often get irritated when I'm not acknowledged for certain things:

    For instance, today when I was coming out of the hospital I held the door open for this mom and her daughter. As they walked through, they glanced at me but didn't give me a thanks or a smile.

    When there's heavy traffic and I stop the car to let people through - there are times when people would wave at me, but there are other times when they won't. I often get irritated at the latter.

    In both examples it seems like I used as a way of saying, "good citizens should always acknowledge each other when helping each other out," and I expected to express this role of a good citizen.

    Just for your info, istj have as base and as dual-seeking, so I'm guessing this kind of scenario wouldn't be as big of a deal to other types?

    --

    Edit:

    Question:

    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    Last edited by peteronfireee; 07-14-2011 at 06:46 PM.

  2. #2
    Trevor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    2,860
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Sensing-Process-Emotivism Reinin small group?? ESTj-ISTj-ESFp-ISFp?? Hey type-carriers!! Come and discuss!!

  3. #3
    peteronfireee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    TIM
    LSI
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    26 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Analyst Trevor View Post
    Sensing-Process-Emotivism Reinin small group. ESTj-ISTj-ESFp-ISFp.

    Hmm, what does this mean? What do they all have in common?

  4. #4
    Trevor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    2,860
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I have edited my previous message. It is my wild guess that it might be connected to that group of types rather than to Ti+Fe.

  5. #5
    peteronfireee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    TIM
    LSI
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    26 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Analyst Trevor View Post
    I have edited my previous message. It is my wild guess that it might be connected to that group of types rather than to Ti+Fe.
    Ah, I see. And are you LII? I'm guessing this isn't big of a problem to you?

    All you ESTj, ISTj, ESFp, ISFp, any similar experiences?

    --

    Wikisocion definitions:

    Sensing
    Sensing is a mental process (or 'psychic function') that involves focusing on concrete, tangible details that can be directly experienced. Sensing comes in two varieties (extraverted and introverted) depending on whether attention is focused on reality outside the subject or on the subject's impressions of reality.
    Process types

    1 Do things sequentially, from the beginning to the end.
    2.Immersed to a process and tends to single-tasking.
    3.Focus between the beginning and the end of processes.
    4. More inclined to read texts on books or computer from beginning to the end.
    5."Of course the answer is right, since we followed the correct procedure."
    Emotivist

    1.Tend to concentrate foremost on the emotional background of interaction, with 'business' a secondary concern.
    2.Prefer the new and novel over the old and known.
    3.Information perceived as unprofessional or low-quality can leave them indifferent.
    4.Have greater difficulty disassociating from requests for action or consideration than from others' emotions and experiences.
    5.“If a conversation is emotionally negative, I consider it wasted.”
    --

    Ah, okay I can see where you're coming from: The use of sensing on focusing on what's going on outside (who said what, who did what), process in expecting the "textbook" response in the beginning/end of the situation, and emotivist focused on trying to get positive response out of the whole ordeal
    Last edited by peteronfireee; 07-14-2011 at 05:54 PM.

  6. #6
    Trevor's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    2,860
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    I'm guessing this isn't big of a problem to you?
    You guessed that right.

  7. #7
    So fluffeh. Cuddly McFluffles's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    TIM
    ESI
    Posts
    2,780
    Mentioned
    28 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm none of those types, and I enjoy being acknowledged for what I do.
    Johari/Nohari

    "Tell someone you love them today, because life is short; shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying."

    Fruit, the fluffy kitty.

  8. #8
    peteronfireee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    TIM
    LSI
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    26 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ryene Astraelis View Post
    I'm none of those types, and I enjoy being acknowledged for what I do.
    Oh, okay, so would be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?

    What's your type? I thought you were infj?

  9. #9
    So fluffeh. Cuddly McFluffles's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    TIM
    ESI
    Posts
    2,780
    Mentioned
    28 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Ryene Astraelis View Post
    I'm none of those types, and I enjoy being acknowledged for what I do.
    Oh, okay, so would be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    It would, though I would try to act like it didn't. I like to be acknowledged for doing something "good", be it socially, morally, or otherwise. I also like to be acknowledged for doing the "correct" thing, fwiw.

    What's your type? I thought you were infj?
    Tentatively.
    Johari/Nohari

    "Tell someone you love them today, because life is short; shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying."

    Fruit, the fluffy kitty.

  10. #10
    lump's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    TIM
    Fi/Te 641 sp/sx
    Posts
    12,604
    Mentioned
    631 Post(s)
    Tagged
    3 Thread(s)

    Default

    EII - i dont usually notice or care if somebody thanks me if i open a door or something...im too selfcentered and inattentive lol. i only care if it stands out to me as something quite different, like getting scoffed at as they walk through which happened once and i was like wtf lol. but mostly, no.

  11. #11
    Azeroffs's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    California
    TIM
    ENTj 3w4 sp/sx
    Posts
    2,216
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    This strikes me as more of human trait than anything, but to be fair, I don't really care if people acknowledge me for opening doors or letting them through on the road. Though I do typically thank or wave at people for letting me through.
    3w4-5w6-9w8

  12. #12
    squark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    2,116
    Mentioned
    140 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    I've noticed that I often get irritated when I'm not acknowledged for certain things:

    For instance, today when I was coming out of the hospital I held the door open for this mom and her daughter. As they walked through, they glanced at me but didn't give me a thanks or a smile.

    When there's heavy traffic and I stop the car to let people through - there are times when people would wave at me, but there are other times when they won't. I often get irritated at the latter.

    In both examples it seems like I used as a way of saying, "good citizens should always acknowledge each other when helping each other out," and I expected to express this role of a good citizen.

    Just for your info, istj have as base and as dual-seeking, so I'm guessing this kind of scenario wouldn't be as big of a deal to other types?

    --

    Edit:

    Question:

    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    I don't get irritated by not being acknowledged for holding the door or letting a car in because I don't pay any attention to the person's reaction to it. It's just one of those things you do. It's so common, and so frequent, I don't even think about it.

    However, I make sure I acknowledge people who do stuff like that for me. I at least nod in the person's direction and say "thanks" for holding a door and such. A few days ago, as I was leaving a convenience store a guy leaving in front of me had cleared the door and was on his way when he noticed me coming out, and he leapt several feet back to grab hold of the door just to hold it for me. Of course I made sure I looked him right in the eye, smiled and said thank you, so he knew it didn't go unnoticed.

    However, if someone asks me to do something, and I have to go out of my way to do it, yeah I get pissed if it isn't appreciated. In those cases I feel like they took advantage of me, and I'm not likely to help them again.

    Voluntary help that I offer and they ask nothing more from me? No thanks needed. I did it because I wanted to. Letting cars in and holding doors almost always fall into this category for me. If I don't want to let a car in, I won't. I'll pull up so close to the car in front of me that a bicycle couldn't fit in sideways. And I purposely let a door slam right in a woman's face once because I went to hold it for her and then she ordered me to keep it open in a really bitchy tone. I heard her cursing but didn't look back to see if she was hurt when I walked away. Basically, I get annoyed when anyone thinks they're entitled to my help or acts like I'm there to serve them. They have another thing coming if they think that. Otherwise, I'm glad to help. I enjoy it.

  13. #13
    Banned
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    18,006
    Mentioned
    162 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?]
    People say thank you, smile and wave when I do that. Would I be irritated ? I don't know, although it depends on my day, I can just say "just frigging drive you worthless bimbo, I don't have all night".

  14. #14
    squark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    2,116
    Mentioned
    140 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    If you want a Ti "rule" for my actions it would be, (although I don't really delineate things out like that usually):

    Nobody is entitled to anything unearned. Not me, and not anyone else.

    and maybe also

    Do things because you want to do them, or you're actually appreciative, not because you "should"

    edit: GAH, still not clear enough. It's like, you know how in some cities, when you stop at a stoplight here comes some dude who starts washing your windshield then expects you to pay for it? You never asked him to do it, so why should you pay? That's the same thing with expecting acknowledgement or appreciation for something that nobody asked you to do in the first place, like holding a door for them.

    On the other hand, say a friend begs you to help them move and you're right in the middle of studying for finals or something. They know this, and you finally agree to help for a couple hours. If after helping them they don't even bother to say thanks or anything, THEN you have some reason to be upset. Their asking implies a sort of exchange. Not quite the right word, but I don't know a better one. There was no agreement that they actually give you something (unless you said, yeah I'll help for a six-pack, and they agreed to that) but a thank-you at least has been earned since they asked for your help. Otherwise they're acting as though they were entitled to that help. Does that make sense? Contrast that with: You have some free time and feel like doing something, and WANT to help them move, then it's silly to expect anything for it.

    Either way, neither you nor the other person has a right to anything from the other, and it's ridiculous to act as though you do. sigh, I'm still not happy with the clarity of that, but it'll do.
    Last edited by squark; 07-14-2011 at 08:39 PM.

  15. #15
    peteronfireee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    TIM
    LSI
    Posts
    521
    Mentioned
    26 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ryene Astraelis View Post
    It would, though I would try to act like it didn't. I like to be acknowledged for doing something "good", be it socially, morally, or otherwise. I also like to be acknowledged for doing the "correct" thing, fwiw.

    What's your type? I thought you were infj?
    Tentatively.
    Ah okay, dang it. I thought I was on the path to self enlightenment until you had to bust that out.

    Quote Originally Posted by laghlagh View Post
    EII - i dont usually notice or care if somebody thanks me if i open a door or something...im too selfcentered and inattentive lol. i only care if it stands out to me as something quite different, like getting scoffed at as they walk through which happened once and i was like wtf lol. but mostly, no.
    You feel too self-centered and inattentive when you're doing something good? Sounds like an oxymoron, heh. I think a lot of EIIs think like that though, which is good. And hah, your illustration is exactly how I picture EIIs I know - inattentive, innocent, and just going about their day doing whats right.

    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    People say thank you, smile and wave when I do that. Would I be irritated ? I don't know, although it depends on my day, I can just say "just frigging drive you worthless bimbo, I don't have all night".
    Haha dude, you're so blunt, so LSE. Hey, whatever works.

    Originally Posted by squark
    ...However, I make sure I acknowledge people who do stuff like that for me. I at least nod in the person's direction and say "thanks" for holding a door and such. A few days ago, as I was leaving a convenience store a guy leaving in front of me had cleared the door and was on his way when he noticed me coming out, and he leapt several feet back to grab hold of the door just to hold it for me. Of course I made sure I looked him right in the eye, smiled and said thank you, so he knew it didn't go unnoticed.
    Oh, without a doubt I'm the same way. I'm so anal about doing everything you just described. I make sure they get the message.

    edit: GAH, still not clear enough. It's like, you know how in some cities, when you stop at a stoplight here comes some dude who starts washing your windshield then expects you to pay for it? You never asked him to do it, so why should you pay? That's the same thing with expecting acknowledgement or appreciation for something that nobody asked you to do in the first place, like holding a door for them.
    Yeah, that stuff is just annoying. Though if there were topless girls doing the car wash I wouldn't mind, I'd just drive off after I get my view. But I feel like that situation's a little different from mine because they're asking for money, whereas all I'm asking for is common courtesty, a little love, haha. I don't want to say be fake to people, but I feel like these small gestures may make a difference in the long run in bettering the world. But who am I to say that saying thanks takes less effort than paying money, huh?

    ...On the other hand, say a friend begs you to help them move and you're right in the middle of studying for finals or something. They know this, and you finally agree to help for a couple hours. If after helping them they don't even bother to say thanks or anything, THEN you have some reason to be upset. Their asking implies a sort of exchange. Not quite the right word, but I don't know a better one. There was no agreement that they actually give you something (unless you said, yeah I'll help for a six-pack, and they agreed to that) but a thank-you at least has been earned since they asked for your help. Otherwise they're acting as though they were entitled to that help. Does that make sense? Contrast that with: You have some free time and feel like doing something, and WANT to help them move, then it's silly to expect anything for it."

    "..Voluntary help that I offer and they ask nothing more from me? No thanks needed. I did it because I wanted to. Letting cars in and holding doors almost always fall into this category for me. If I don't want to let a car in, I won't. I'll pull up so close to the car in front of me that a bicycle couldn't fit in sideways. And I purposely let a door slam right in a woman's face once because I went to hold it for her and then she ordered me to keep it open in a really bitchy tone. I heard her cursing but didn't look back to see if she was hurt when I walked away. Basically, I get annoyed when anyone thinks they're entitled to my help or acts like I'm there to serve them. They have another thing coming if they think that. Otherwise, I'm glad to help. I enjoy it.
    These are all good illustrations. Yeah I agree that for me it depends on the situation at hand:

    I'm driving on the main highway and I see that there is huge traffic ahead of me. I also see that there are cars merging in to my right. To be fair, I'm going to have to let some cars in, because otherwise I'll be an asshole of society. I let one person in, then nobody else until I get to the next car that needs to get in, but never, ever two cars in a row. If a second car tries to cut me off after seeing I let one car in already, I'll get pissed. Why? Because I'm trying to be fair, but if somebody is trying to take advantage of that. I'll be more than happy to let many as many cars as I can in, just don't think I'm a pushover though.
    Last edited by peteronfireee; 07-15-2011 at 07:17 AM.

  16. #16
    So fluffeh. Cuddly McFluffles's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    TIM
    ESI
    Posts
    2,780
    Mentioned
    28 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Ryene Astraelis: Retarding enlightenment, one post at a time.
    Johari/Nohari

    "Tell someone you love them today, because life is short; shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying."

    Fruit, the fluffy kitty.

  17. #17
    Park's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Beyond the blue horizon
    TIM
    SLI
    Posts
    13,088
    Mentioned
    164 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I do the same things, but I don't anticipate any explicit acknowledgement to follow. I just try to be helpful, and whether and how much I'll get noticed or acknowledged doesn't matter.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  18. #18
    Haikus
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    MI
    TIM
    IEI-Ni
    Posts
    10,060
    Mentioned
    223 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    You know OP, I agree with you that Fi types are rude, specifically in that way.

    But good luck getting them to admit it properly or even change it you know? So I think it would be so awkward and emotionally/socially suicidal to point this out to somebody IRL. But yeah it's a Fi-valuing thing.

    Socionics is actually quite harsh but that's why I like it. =/ It sorta busts everybody's balls on the shitty things they do to other people. As an INFp who faps to the human drama of it all, I'm kinda impressed. But when I get out in the 'real world' I also sort of know that it's neurotically vacuumizing reality and zero-ing on one specific aspect. Due to natural, base empathy and feeling naturally guilty when we offend others, not many people are just going to say exactly what they think of everybody like a narcissistic drugged up drag queen gay man. <grin, tongue sticking out>

    God, I've been demonstrating Fi to EVERYBODY lately. =p

  19. #19
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,630
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I get irritated when people thank me for those kinds of simple things.

    No anyway seriously lol. I relate to squark's posts.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  20. #20
    Banned
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    18,006
    Mentioned
    162 Post(s)
    Tagged
    1 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Haha dude, you're so blunt, so LSE. Hey, whatever works.
    Well, always said the best way pinpointing one's type/quadra is to, actually, find your opposing one.

    Cheers mate.

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    I get irritated when people thank me for those kinds of simple things.
    And cry like a baby. "Oh my oh my, woe is me, he/she thanked me, it's over".

  21. #21
    force my hand's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    2,334
    Mentioned
    6 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Question:

    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    Yeah for sure.

    Studies in evolutionary psychology show that altruism typically comes with a catch, so when people get by with a 'free pass' it's irritating. I've gone out of my way to expend a resource - be it energy, or time, or the acknowledgment that you exist - and you've signified by your behaviour that you're not willing to do the same. It's subconscious feeling that you wouldn't have my back, and therefore I can't trust you. These little things are the expressions of how healthy a community is.
    SLI/ISTp -- Te subtype

  22. #22
    Park's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Beyond the blue horizon
    TIM
    SLI
    Posts
    13,088
    Mentioned
    164 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by force my hand View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Question:

    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    Yeah for sure.

    Studies in evolutionary psychology show that altruism typically comes with a catch, so when people get by with a 'free pass' it's irritating. I've gone out of my way to expend a resource - be it energy, or time, or the acknowledgment that you exist - and you've signified by your behaviour that you're not willing to do the same. It's subconscious feeling that you wouldn't have my back, and therefore I can't trust you. These little things are the expressions of how healthy a community is.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  23. #23
    force my hand's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    2,334
    Mentioned
    6 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Oh lawdy, all them big words, tee hee.
    SLI/ISTp -- Te subtype

  24. #24
    Haikus Beautiful sky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    EII land
    TIM
    EII INFj
    Posts
    22,740
    Mentioned
    531 Post(s)
    Tagged
    6 Thread(s)

    Default

    My LSI boss doesn't thank anyone for this sort of thing either, like opening doors and such and I don't care if he doesn't thank me.

  25. #25
    Marie84's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Toronto, Canada
    TIM
    EII
    Posts
    2,359
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by force my hand View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by guy123 View Post
    Question:

    Would you be irritated by a scenario similar to the one above? If you do, what's your thought process? If not, why not?
    Yeah for sure.

    Studies in evolutionary psychology show that altruism typically comes with a catch, so when people get by with a 'free pass' it's irritating. I've gone out of my way to expend a resource - be it energy, or time, or the acknowledgment that you exist - and you've signified by your behaviour that you're not willing to do the same. It's subconscious feeling that you wouldn't have my back, and therefore I can't trust you. These little things are the expressions of how healthy a community is.

    EII INFj
    Forum status: retired

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •