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Thread: Facebook comment

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Default Facebook comment

    One of my fb friends posted this:

    "I love it when our closest family and friends remember my kids' birthdays. Thank you."

    LOL!!!! So what is this saying here: If you think you're close to me and you haven't remembered my kids' birthday, you're not really close. Either that or you suck. Doesn't feel like there's any good way to interpret this. If you indeed are close and did remember the birthdays, then you're in the clear but then why doesn't she thank those people in private and individually??? To me, this comment screams "my kid is having a birthday and I need attention regarding that fact". My interpretation of this isn't even colored by my relationship with this person because neither I nor she considers us close so it's not like I feel that it's directed at me--it's not. Still, I find it kind of rude.

    What do you think of this comment? Fi-seeking?

    FTR, she's probably LIE.
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    ILE - ENTp 1981slater's Avatar
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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Probably a comment to thank people with no wierd emotional reason behind.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    probably. but it SEEMS WEIRD TO ME. I would never expect anyone to remember and if they did, fine, but does it require some big facebook thank-you? I dunno. It's SO weird to me, that it feels calculated. but you're probably right that it wasn't meant to be anything other than a blanket "thank you that made me feel good/special".
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    Yeah, shes saying, "remember when my kid is having a b-day" not a very subtle way of doing it, but Ive seen worse.

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    Robot Assassin Pa3s's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    probably. but it SEEMS WEIRD TO ME.
    To me too, I'd rate this as a yell which is like "You're not close to me if you don't even remember when my children were born." I personally wouldn't care, but I also think it's rude. People have other worries day to day than remembering whose children were born all the time. It's not that the whole world would revolve around her and her offspring.
    Last edited by Pa3s; 07-07-2011 at 05:07 PM. Reason: typo
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    It is an obnoxious comment. If all she wanted to do was thank people she could have just said, thanks to everyone who wished my kids happy birthday. Instead she chose to try and guilt trip people into wishing her kids happy birthday. "If you really care and want to be close to me, you have to wish my kids happy birthday" is essentially what she seems to be saying to me.
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    FB comment: "I love it when our closest family and friends remember my kids' birthdays. Thank you."
    Me: BURN!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Typhon View Post
    Yeah, shes saying, "remember when my kid is having a b-day" not a very subtle way of doing it, but Ive seen worse.
    .

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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Probably a comment to thank people with no wierd emotional reason behind.
    I couldn't find anything weird after first reading the comment, but upon closer inspection, it does seem to be rather passive-aggressive. "Oh, you didn't bother to remember my kids' birthdays? Well, that's OK, I only expect my closest friends and family to do that, so you're off the hook. Bitch." If she just made the comment out of thankfulness, she wouldn't have thought to add the word "closest" in there.

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    Fe thread is Fe.

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    soccer mums on fb.case closed.

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    These are the kind of comments that enrage me. It is an extraneous outpouring of gratitude at best, and passive-aggressive attention-seeking behaviour at worst. I think it is the latter in this case. It makes it sounds like she thinks the people who remember her kids' birthdays are the best, while the rest can go to hell. She is subtly condemning those who do not by officially recognizing those who do.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Probably a comment to thank people with no wierd emotional reason behind.
    this was my thought at first and i was like wtf are these people talking about lol. but then i realized it was posted publicly, like on her wall, and not just to one person? yeah, in that case it seems calculated imo.

    idk, i think its annoying how some people seem to think remembering dates is an important part of being close, but it seems like a lot of people think so. if i wasn't close to her to begin with and i saw that comment i would probably just roll my eyes and forget about it because it just seems like a run-of-the-mill irritant to me, lol. maybe she sees herself as advocating for her kids.

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MegaDoomer View Post
    People have other worries day to day than remembering whose children were born all the time. It's not that the whole world would revolve around her and her offspring.
    Of course. That's why I don't think such comment was aimed at as scoffing at people: nobody would ever think that everyone has to remember their kids' birthday, so it seems just natural to be surprised about it and publicly thank them.

    Btw, it might also depend on how you feel about birthday wishes. I'm a bit of an asshole and thus never give happy birthdays on facebook and I don't feel guilty about it. So maybe someone a bit more sensitive about this issue might think it's an attack on their character.

    It is an extraneous outpouring of gratitude at best
    What? It's her facebook wall, lol, not a phone call or someone shouting at you. Just words on a screen.

    If she just made the comment out of thankfulness, she wouldn't have thought to add the word "closest" in there.
    Lol jesus do you generally think carefully about what you say on facebook? It's not a love letter and you're not speaking with mr. Obama ahah

    basically if I were to analyze more closely everything someone says or writes I would prolly find a thousand reasons to feel like they're insulting me, someone close to me, something I did or said, etc.
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    What do you think of this comment? Fi-seeking?
    IIRC, all people I know who do such things are ESE and EIE (not that all Fe-Base I know do it). I include here announcing their birthday - not necessarily children - and other "important" events that matter to them. Without a context, this is what I think, but: I guess it depends on the context in which she did it, eg I could see the woman being in a challenge with someone else, making such move to wound a rival. So I can see also other types (eg. Se-Base or LSE), but hardly an Introvert.
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    I think it's impossible to make anything of that. It may merely mean she is embarrassed by the attention but still felt obliged to say something about it, or that she is emphasising that everybody concerned are close friends even if they didn't actually know that she loved this. It's really not clear that she's making a distinction between close friends and not-close friends either, rather than just merely friends who may on the off-chance have said something about the birthdays.

    If she had said "I love it when complete strangers who may be paedophiles remember my kids' birthdays. Thank you.", THAT would be something.

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    Quote Originally Posted by The Ineffable View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    What do you think of this comment? Fi-seeking?
    IIRC, all people I know who do such things are ESE and EIE (not that all Fe-Base I know do it). I include here announcing their birthday - not necessarily children - and other "important" events that matter to them. Without a context, this is what I think, but: I guess it depends on the context in which she did it, eg I could see the woman being in a challenge with someone else, making such move to wound a rival. So I can see also other types (eg. Se-Base or LSE), but hardly an Introvert.
    Yeah, I too agree it depends on context...Too hard to tell straight up with limited info.

    I will say however that it is usually my ESE/EIE friends that make a huge deal about remembering/outwardly acknowledging birthdays. I would wager > if I had to choose between the two

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    Quote Originally Posted by Subterranean View Post
    If she had said "I love it when complete strangers who may be paedophiles remember my kids' birthdays. Thank you.", THAT would be something.
    lmao
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    She is DEFINITELY not an introvert. Not in any sense of the word.

    I do believe she's T>F, and intuitive also. ENTj, imo. And, I don't think she was making a "huge deal" out of the birthday thing but it was interesting how she phrased the "close family and friends" and of course if you post something on your wall, it comes up in everyone's news feed.

    I have no idea why her comment angers me so, VERY FEW things anger me. But I am so annoyed by it. (I am probably a little irritable in general this week) Okay so now that I think about it, MAYBE what she's saying, in a roundabout way, is that she doesn't expect anyone but close family and friends to remember. But that also implies (does it not??) that she DOES expect THEM to remember. Or at least "appreciates" it. Which kind of implies that they should because it would make her happy.

    Seriously people, I don't give a flying rip if anyone remembers my kids birthdays, even my BEST BEST friends in the whole world. It's a birthday. It comes every year. It means only that you haven't died. Congrats, you're still alive! yay!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    This is why I love The Real Housewives. Bitches be getting down.
    !!
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    I've seen these type of weird Fi dual seeking type of comments before from Te leading people. It's almost like they're trying to dabble in relationship. I don't think she meant it in a passive aggressive type of way, more like trying to express how much she appreciates certain type pf relationship behaviors.

    The theme is always the same though, it's about what are people doing to "prove" their relationship worthiness. Again an Fi way of looking at things, for Fe valuing types, it's just so flat and stale.

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