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Thread: A Functional Breakdown-- Semi-Duality and Mirage/Illusionary

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    Default A Functional Breakdown-- Semi-Duality and Mirage/Illusionary

    These two were pretty easy to put together, since parts I could just copy from my Duality description.

    This is fun

    Semi-Duality

    Base and Suggestive/Dual-Seeking Interaction

    What you most need and desire in support of your Base, but struggle to provide for yourself, is something your Semi-Dual is perfectly equipped to provide for you. Indeed, he will be eager to share his most natural and valued strength with you, and you will probably need provide only the most subtle hints in order to get what you need psychologically.

    Often, your Dual-Seeking function is something you might not even be aware that you need. Like the phrase "ignorance is bliss" suggests, if you have rarely been exposed to or made aware of your needs in the area of your Suggestive function, you may even go on for many years not even realizing what you're missing. For a person exposed to Duality (or Semi-Duality) for the first time, it can be very much like a sugar-deprived child tasting candy for the first time: you're likely to think "where have you been all my life?" and may even become "addicted" in a way. What you once existed happily without, all of a sudden you can't bear to let it go, and you find yourself wanting more more more.

    Creative and Demonstrative Interaction

    Even though your Creative function is strong and valued, you may find yourself sometimes wishing for it to just take care of itself, as you focus on your Base and Hidden Agenda. As a result, the Creative function may be referred to as a "pseudo-dual-seeking" function.

    At times, a strong manifestation of your Semi-Dual’s Demonstrative function may “trick” you into thinking you’ve found “Duality” for your Creative function. However, you may be shocked and bewildered later, when you discover that your Semi-Dual doesn’t take his Demonstration seriously, and hardly cares to talk about or dwell on it when pushed.

    As a result, you may find yourself putting a whole lot more time and effort into your Creative function and less towards your Hidden Agenda, which can leave you feeling frustrated in your personal growth and psychological development. Or else you may find yourself beginning to neglect your Creative nature altogether in an effort to please your Semi-Dual, which can be bad for your Ego.

    Role and Ignoring/Observing Interaction

    At times, you will feel the need to exert yourself in your Role function. Efforts related to the Role, however, are uncomfortable at best, and something that you will try to avoid or put off as your Role function directly opposes your Base.

    Expending too much time and effort in your Role can leave you feeling particularly exhausted and out of touch with yourself. However, as stated above, you will still feel pressure to focus on your Role at times, as a "necessary evil," particularly when it comes to defending or protecting yourself against pressures on your Vulnerable function, which is even more uncomfortable to focus on than your Role.

    Your Semi-Dual is perfectly suited to you, then, as your Role function is his Ignoring-- or Observing-- function. Your Semi-Dual is one of those rare individuals who will likely never put pressure on your Role; and when other forces try to do so, your Semi-Dual will be there to support you and help navigate you through, while at the same time helping you to not take it all too seriously.

    Keep in mind that your Semi-Dual is not very likely to want to actually take over for you when it comes to your Role function, so you will end up having to take care of yourself much of the time. Your Semi-Dual will be there to help you, but more as a sort of coach/cheerleader. You will still be the one out there on the field, playing the game.

    Vulnerable/PoLR and Mobilizing/Hidden Agenda Interaction

    Where much of the conflict from a Semi-Duality relationship stems from is this area, where the Vulnerable in one and the Hidden Agenda in the other clash most uncomfortably.

    As the weakest and most awkward part of your psyche, your PoLR is hardly an area in which you care to put any focus or energy. But as your Semi-Dual’s Hidden Agenda, he will naturally be inclined to spend a good deal of time here in an effort to improve himself and support efforts in his Ego block. But as this is still a weak function even for your Semi-Dual, he may try to get you involved as well—especially if you are in a very close relationship where you naturally want to be doing things together. You will immediately feel very inadequate and uncomfortable in this supportive role, however, and may find yourself making every excuse not to participate. This may offend your Semi-Dual, who was only trying to strengthen your bond by inviting you to do something with him that he finds stimulating and enjoyable.

    Mirage

    Base and Ignoring/Observing Interaction

    As your Ignoring function, the amount of time and focus your Mirage partner is naturally inclined to spend on their own Base function pursuits will—at best—amuse you, and—at worst—frustrate you and cause you to want to slap your Mirage upside the head and force him to see things your way for a change!

    Not to say that your Mirage's Base is an area in which you feel uncomfortable or unable to understand. Rather, you will probably understand easily. However, at the same time you will feel inclined to think "what's the use?" when approached with matters related to your Ignoring function, and reject them without much thought.

    Nobody likes to be ignored, and of course you want your efforts in your Base function to be taken seriously, but your Mirage probably never will. Though he may humor you at times—as you will humor him—for the sake of maintaining a good relationship.

    Creative and Mobilizing/Hidden Agenda Interaction

    Even though the Mobilizing function is considered weak, you feel a certain psychological pull or urge to improve yourself and become strong in this area. Consequently, you naturally-- albeit sporadically-- put a good deal of time and effort into your Hidden Agenda. When this happens, however, efforts related to your Creative function tend to get put on hold, or neglected.

    Even though your Creative function is strong and valued, you may find yourself sometimes wishing for it to just take care of itself, as you focus on your Base and Hidden Agenda. As a result, the Creative function may be referred to as a "pseudo-dual-seeking" function. You and your Mirage partner will naturally connect when it comes to each other’s Creative and Mobilizing functions, and will probably spend a good deal of your time together in pursuits related to these two functions.

    Role and Suggestive/Dual-Seeking Interaction

    At times, you will feel the need to exert yourself in your Role function. Efforts related to the Role, however, are uncomfortable at best, and something that you will try to avoid or put off as your Role function directly opposes your Base.

    Expending too much time and effort in your Role can leave you feeling particularly exhausted and out of touch with yourself. However, as stated above, you will still feel pressure to focus on your Role at times, as a "necessary evil," particularly when it comes to defending or protecting yourself against pressures on your Vulnerable function, which is even more uncomfortable to focus on than your Role.

    Your Mirage is ill-equipped to help you in this area, however, as your Role is his Suggestive. He may perceive the need for one of you to perform in this area, but he will hardly be able to do it, and so the task will likely fall to you. But you are liable to fail without the support that you need from a good “coach” or helper, and when that happens you may find yourself wanting to blame your Mirage partner for “backing out” on you when you needed him.

    The other problem that can arise from this sort of relation, is that what you most need psychologically in support of your Base, but struggle to provide for yourself—or in other words, your Dual-Seeking needs—is something that your Mirage partner will hardly feel inclined to provide. He may at times offer suggestions (which may be more or less helpful) to try to help you in this area, but to actually put time and effort—which of course would oppose his Base—will be perceived as drudgery and hardly worthwhile. So, you will be left to either make your best effort to provide for yourself, or to find another person or source better able to fill your need.

    Vulnerable/PoLR and Demonstrative Interaction

    Your Mirage’s Demostrative function is perfectly positioned to support your psyche's weakest unvalued function, your Vulnerable function, or Point of Least Resistance.

    Because the Demonstrative function comes so naturally, while at the same time being unvalued, one is often consciously unaware of its manifestations in himself, and hardly cares to think about it even when it is pointed out to him. Your Mirage’s Demonstrative function, then, is perfectly suited to your PoLR, which is so weak and unnatural to you, that you don't want to think about it, either.

    So, you and your Mirage partner can both exist together, he performing without much thought his Demostrative nature, in a way that you will be free to almost completely neglect the Vulnerable in yourself, and avoid the necessity of engaging in it as long as your Mirage is around.
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    You know what? Though this is an old thread, I figured since I have something to add, I might as well.

    I have a Semi-Dual relationship with my boss. I am female, and my boss is male. It works great since he is one of those rare people who actually understand, need, and value correctly, my Ti, thereby earning my respect. We have great performance review chats, because I can actually open up to him without any of my usual scepticism and I do not have to prepare 'masks' and 'smokescreens' to demur on things I know the other party won't understand regarding my motivations etc. - I think this is probably the force of his Fe. For once I can be plain to my boss regarding what my real career aspirations are. We both generate ideas and projections, so that's enjoyable, though he does annoy me by tending not to follow through ideas to their logical and complete conclusion. Because he's my boss, he does not impose on my PoLR and he knows my weakness (how? he's ENFj and besides, I told him). He must compensate for it some other way, I guess. And it's true: he supports me when my Role is in trouble. But insists on 'stretching' me so that I develop it more. Overall, semi-dual is a pretty good team lead-team member relationship, if the LII is the team member. But for a personal relationship? I think the relative lack of stability and dependability would bother me too much. I think ENFjs value different things in the romance dynamic.

    I have an existing mirage relationship with a female friend (unknown subtype), >15 years now. Pretty standard intertype description; we get along, but even though we share a lot of personal values we just don't get to talking about it when it's just the two of us. With the ESFj friend in the mix, then the dynamics become great (although that's may be just because my dual is there to help me open up).

    Now, there is another mirage relationship with a work associate (male), with both of us being irrational subtypes. The age of the relationship is much younger, very initial. This may partly be due to erm, romantic attraction, but we really, really get along. He appreciates my 'big picture' perspective which is effortless to me, and which he acknowledges as a weakness, and I actually admire his sincere diplomacy/value on good relationships (which may only be partly type related) - in large part because of my personal beliefs. The interesting part is that I find myself exerting my Ne, to see his different worldview, and become quite a bit more tolerant of his Te emphasis. I still don't value it, but I'm not annoyed, kind of like how one might benignly and evenly fondly tolerate the cat tearing about the house for no reason. When he does express disapproval of me (which happens rarely) but then decides to overlook it, he would attribute the 'fault' to a physical stress (such as hunger or pressure) that I may have been experiencing (using his Si to bridge the gap?). I don't have trouble with him cutting short my Ti - in the first place, I don't tend to reveal much of it when communicating, since I know hardly anyone is capable of appreciating where the brilliant insight they wanted was generated. In the second place, he would be too polite to cut me off. I can see the rational subtype having no such compulsions, though.

    Regarding PoLR/Demonstrative, it's true - I find myself naturally pacing out things in response to his weak Ni - and really I'm aware of it at all because I have to limit it to not overreach the team roles that we have. It has occurred to me it would be great to have somebody similarly protect my PoLR, and as a female, the value is increased if the protection is from a male. I'm not sure if it's related to Se being his Demonstrative, but for some reason I feel complete safety interacting with him - like there can be no threat of aggression and it's not because he couldn't or that I'm exempted or that he is restraining himself but merely that it just wouldn't occur to him to. I mean, that's a safety that's not conditional on unreliable things like someone's regard for me, willpower, or incompetence. I just have to never threaten his family, I guess.

    For the other functional interactions, have to wait and see what that's like - same or different from my existing experience.

    I'm finding myself surprised that it's quite feasible for an LII to have an interesting Mirage relationship, provided both are irrationals, there are considerable overlapping interests, and maybe being opposite genders help. I'm just startled by the difference in dynamic, since I thought I already knew this intertype relation through already having one.

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