Hai guys

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

I've been thinking about 'the way we'd like other people to treat us' and in my brain I split it in the following two dichotomies. Which one do you prefer?

1. I prefer a safe distance with people. I need other people to leave me alone as much as possible, unless I ask them for help. I want people who 'inspire me from a distance.'

2. I prefer people to be a little pushy. I want them to pay attention to me, and be nosy to my struggles. I want people to tell me what to do so I know the best course of action to take.

I think for me, I'd much rather prefer the first option.

[silverchris9]

I prefer 1 for the world at large, and would like for there to be approximately 3-5 people in my life who are more 2-ish and pushy. 'Cause I do kinda want people to pry, because it makes it easier to do what I want to do if I think someone else wants it, and I do want to talk about my life and my business and whatever.

BUT, if they're going to come in and say something silly and cliche and unhelpful, it would have been better if they hadn't intruded in the first place. So in that way, especially with strangers/people I don't trust/people I know aren't on the same wavelength as me, I prefer 1.

[ashlesha]

i'm going to say 1 i guess...but its really hard to choose.

i think 1 is better for me because i'm prone to just going with the flow too much and its good for me to be forced into working shit out for myself by somebody keeping that distance. and it can feel good when that happens even if it also is stress inducing.

the drawback is that i associate caring with involvement so 1 seems sort of cold.

[Pa3s]

Definitely #1 for me.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Perhaps option 2 has to be written somewhat better so that 1 doesn't always feel like the best choice. Hmm hehe.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

I just realized something though.

Option 2 is more like how a 'working class person' would treat somebody and option 1 is more like how somebody in a professional field treats other people. And it's like, no wonder why we hold people in the #1 field as more respectable or whatever you know. At first I didn't think the ass kissing they received in life was that warranted. But it somehow makes sense. The #1 type of person only jumps in and intervenes when the person actually did something wrong, objectively....

#2 just reeks of nosy working class mom ness or something. =/ It's like I find it respectable that they don't think doing 'real work' is beneathe them but psychologically their attitude can be acidic.

[munenori2]

Unquestionably 1.

[ScarlettLux]

2 for sure

[Creepy-male]

I've been thinking about 'the way we'd like other people to treat us' and in my brain I split it in the following two dichotomies. Which one do you prefer?

1. I prefer a safe distance with people. I need other people to leave me alone as much as possible, unless I ask them for help. I want people who 'inspire me from a distance.'

2. I prefer people to be a little pushy. I want them to pay attention to me, and be nosy to my struggles. I want people to tell me what to do so I know the best course of action to take.

I think for me, I'd much rather prefer the first option.

1 all the way

I don't mind pushiness, but many people I think fail at it. My dad is actually pretty good at being pushy from time to time, its a bit corny but when I was in elementary school I did karate and there were these tests you did to move up the ranks and you had to break boards and do certain forms which were series of martial arts moves strung together into combinations. One time I didn't break the boards and I didn't move up the rank, and I was left behind. Further people trained in classes of people of the same ranks or belts or whatever, so some people ended up going onto a different class and I had to stay in the same class with all the other failures and the newly arriving people from the belt/rank/class below. Anyways I decided shortly after I wanted to quit because it wasn't fun, but my dad told me that I shouldn't quit and stuff just because I failed (he's one of those big sports people and stuff, but not in an annoying support the team kind of way). I remember it actually worked, because I realized I was quitting because I failed. It was kind of pushy, and getting into my business, but at the end of the day I have good feelings attached to the experience, because I ended up continuing forward again with a new found sense of motivation.

Most people when they get pushy though, just annoy the fuck out of me. They just kind of overstep their boundaries and get involved in your life, wreak a bunch of havok and then leave you in a state of chaos and then they go "oops, sorry I'm out of here, bye!".

I think if people are going to try and be pushy they should really know what they are getting themselves into. Tons of people make the mistake of getting embedded in other people's problems and then eventually that drama leaks over and containments into their own life, like someone catching a virus from a sick patient, then they freak out and abandon people in quarantine. I see it all the time, its sad, but true. I think people really should stay out of other people's business/lives unless they are prepared to really engage themselves into the ordeal.

You also have tons of shitty parents who shoot out kids just because its what they think they need to do, but they have no idea the level of extreme emotional, physical, and mental duress a kid can create in their live. They get lulled into a sense of idyllic fantasies about being a parent.

[stray]

2 maybe. I guess it seems closer to me because it sounds less distant. It's also kind of flattering if someone takes an interest in problems. I don't need some mom to push me around though. If that's what it is, both options suck.

[redbaron]

I've been thinking about 'the way we'd like other people to treat us' and in my brain I split it in the following two dichotomies. Which one do you prefer?

1. I prefer a safe distance with people. I need other people to leave me alone as much as possible, unless I ask them for help. I want people who 'inspire me from a distance.'

2. I prefer people to be a little pushy. I want them to pay attention to me, and be nosy to my struggles. I want people to tell me what to do so I know the best course of action to take.

I think for me, I'd much rather prefer the first option.

#1 with MOST people, absolutely. But I want maybe one or two of the RIGHT people to pay attention to me and be nosy. Not to really ever tell me what to do, but to hear me out and maybe tell me HOW to go about what I've already decided to do. Probably my top fault is that I have a hard time implementing courses of action.