So basically there was a fair bit of 'arjy barjy' at my weekly 5 a side match and I want some advice on how to diffuse these situations.
Will set the scenario for yous, so please discuss and advise.
Our team was made up of 4 guys (IEE, ILE(possible IEE) , EII and SLI) and 2 girls (IEE, can't get a bead on the other :s, will call her NAC (not a clue)). The ILE and SLI were really there to win, all the others for fun.
But yeah, the game started off innocuously enough, but it quickly became clear we were outclassed, and it was going to be a much more defensive game for us. Throughout the first half the the ILE was shouting 'advice' at everyone, who to mark, when to run etc etc but most especially at our goalie EII, criticising him heavily. Our SLI was getting annoyed as he wasn't getting any chances to shoot, and by the end of the first half (15 min halves btw) were 5-3 down, with a fair bit of luck, and this game was extremely physical with people getting shoved over and into walls left right and centre. NAC came to me at half time complaining that ILE was detracting from her fun, yelling at her etc EII said the same, the same for me (IEE) and girl IEE.
anyhoo, about 5 mins into the next half there is an eruption, SLI and ILE are yelling and slight shoving of 2 guys on the other team.
This is the part I would need help with yeah, I pretty much just said "Relax guys, it's soccer!" which didn't seem to calm them down. Generally in any sort of conflict I tend to keep mouth shut and run away. Unless it involves me in which case I try to be assertive...while running away.
So any ideas in terms of socionics, how to calm these guys down, or any types for that matter. Anyone with personal experience or theories from advanced reading please chip in.
Also NAC girl ended up walking away and into the night alone, we found her eventually, and she cries out "All I want is my brother back, and these bastards are just fighting over a soccer ball" and then quiet sobbing. Myself, IEE girl and EII guy were in the car, so it was awkward silence, none of us knew what to say, then IEE girl goes of on some random topic (much to my relief) so also compassion ideas would be good. I am quite independant, never really tell anyone anything personally effecting me and deal with it myself, so my typical view is 'why can't everyone be like that?" but yeah...
(ps i happen to be writing a role play detailing an intervention into aggression in sport for Sport Psychology. but I only started after the match...in case anyone was interested)