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Thread: the direction of socionic's influence

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    Default the direction of socionic's influence

    How does socionic influence your relationships or attitudes towards relationships? thanks to your socionic knowledge about different types and intertype relations do you rather:

    A) use it to understand and develop your relationships with every type to make your relationships better, also those with incompatible types?

    B) use it to type and avoid the types and relationships which seem incompatible, justifying the incompatibility?

    if you use it IRL then probably for both purposes, but which serves you more?
    Last edited by Marietta; 04-06-2011 at 10:52 AM.

  2. #2
    Creepy-male

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    Hmm, both serve me equally. I guess I don't actively seek or break contact off with people I don't get along with, so I've found more use in using Socionics to make a good impression on people I'm not in too close contact with. I made pretty good friends with an ESI that way.

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    lump's Avatar
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    i don't actively use it. i can't really pretend to be a different type or use weak and/or unvalued functions sincerely. i've tried - what stands out the most in my mind is when i tried to show more Fe with an SLE i knew and ended up just being a more smiley and fakey version of myself, so it wasn't genuine Fe and just made me feel like an idiot and didn't help anything, lol. maybe some people can pull of this sort of thing. if so, it would be interesting to hear the details. maybe it just comes down to acting skill?

    as far as deciding my relationships...i trust my instincts about people more than i trust my ability to type, and more than that i just don't like the idea of using a theoretical model to choose my relationships with. i'm sure that now that socionics has infiltrated my brain it does play some role in my decisions, but definitely not on purpose.

    for me its mostly just provides a language and framework for interesting patterns that can be seen in people.

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    ILE - ENTp 1981slater's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marietta View Post
    How does socionic influence your relationships or attitudes towards relationships? thanks to your socionic knowledge about different subtypes and intertype relations do you rather:

    A) use it to understand and develop your relationships with every type to make your relationships better, also those with incompatible types?

    B) use it to type and avoid the types and relationships which seem incompatible, justifying the incompatibility?

    if you use it IRL then probably for both purposes, but which serves you more?
    When in company of gammas, I try not to bring Luke Skywalker's biography into the conversation.
    ILE "Searcher"
    Socionics: ENTp
    DCNH: Dominant --> perhaps Normalizing
    Enneagram: 7w6 "Enthusiast"
    MBTI: ENTJ "Field Marshall" or ENTP "Inventor"
    Astrological sign: Aquarius

    To learn, read. To know, write. To master, teach.

  5. #5
    Creepy-male

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    Quote Originally Posted by 1981slater View Post
    When in company of gammas, I try not to bring Luke Skywalker's biography into the conversation.


    --

    I dunno, with that ESI, I just go through the Fi routine of reaching out to her as an individual if it seems she's out of place, or upset with something going o in the chat room we frequent or what have you. She and the SLI both greet me really enthusiastically whenever I log in now, it's nice. And so does the ESE, but, you know. ESE.

    Not that any of that is really out-of-character for Alpha. I think it's just generally pretty difficult to dislike or fail to get along with Nines if it's just coffee klatch territory. That's probably it, more than Socionics.

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    Jarno's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marietta View Post
    How does socionic influence your relationships or attitudes towards relationships?
    good question.

    I vote for B.

    I'm no longer a racist, I'm have become a quadrist.

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    c) use it to understand why some people are so frustrating and annoying and be less annoyed by them

    on a more serious note it comes in handy from time to time in different situations, once for example I incorporated it when I was trying to talk a perosn out of committing suicide

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    Quote Originally Posted by siuntal View Post
    c) use it to understand why some people are so frustrating and annoying and be less annoyed by them
    Agree. To understand they aren't deliberately being annoying.

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    Don't forget the the thehotelambush's Avatar
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    There is more to relationships than just socionics.

    If I feel I will get along with someone despite their type, I will pursue a closer relationship. Likewise, if I feel I won't get along with someone despite their type, I will create more distance.

    Socionics is just a short-cut to gauging long-term compatibility.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    good question.

    I vote for B.

    I'm no longer a racist, I'm have become a quadrist.
    It's B for me too. In a way it's liberating to have a different explanation that sth is not working and you shouldn't force it, but I think I am at risk of sticking too much with it too, justyfing stuff that maybe I should be working on, idk? and being a quadrist *.*. anyway, socionic is really cool for me because it says "don't force yourself, you will always have a conflictor, a supervisor, at the same time be sb's supervisor, but you have a dual and some other compatible types as well". it seems FAIR. It also corresponds to my need for discovering and explaining hidden patterns of compatibility and incompatibility and personality-based relativism.

    another thing that is very interesting for me are assymetric relationships, and how they occur between neighbouring quadras, not the conflicting ones. Before socionics I would probably think they will occur between people with more differences, or that they will be more universal (like, some types are mostly supervisors and some are mostly supervised) and based on things connected mostly with my superego values. so it's a nice perspective to think about it from a dfferent angle.

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    I would even go as far as saying, voting for A is dangerous.

    1) you don't act like your natural self, when you try to manipulate or adapt. Situations can go awry.

    a real life experience: I used to be gentle to a conflictor colleague so we wouldn't get into conflict. This made me so unassertive she could kick my but every two weeks or so. It was only until I got mad, that things settled down.

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    The only usefulness is that if i'm working alongside someone with an incompatible type, and I see I'm annoying them, I try to adjust what I'm doing to annoy them less, and I recognize how I'm annoying them because of Socionics. I make friends without thinking of their type, though I do seem to have more friends of some types than others, and I naturally become closer to some people than others. But I'm a fan of letting things progress naturally.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
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    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marietta View Post
    How does socionic influence your relationships or attitudes towards relationships?
    It doesn't, I know what am I looking for and know how to distinguish it from what I find shite, trivial and lacking every quality I look and crave for. Done it before this socionics, doing it after.

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