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Thread: Is this an accurate description of SLI-ISTp?

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    Default Is this an accurate description of SLI-ISTp?

    I've been trying to find a good example of a real SLI woman and often read about Grace Kelly being type as such. I stumbled upon this description and identified with it so much. Word for word, it's me. I wanted to know if any other SLI's agree? Basically just take out Grace Kelly and replace it with SLI and see if this description works...

    Tenderhearted and sympathetic to an unusual degree, Grace Kelly has an understanding of other people's feelings and needs which borders on telepathy. Grace Kelly is extremely compassionate and cannot bear to see any fellow creature - human or animal - suffer. Because of her kindness, people suffering from pain or confusion are drawn to Kelly for help, which she readily gives. Sometimes Kelly's soft-heartedness is taken advantage of. She is a gentle soul and has a great love and affinity for music. Because many of her feelings are vague and she cannot easily verbalize how she experiences life, music seems a natural language for Kelly. She is also romantic and often "in love with love".

    She is emotionally expressive and often dramatizes her feelings, acting them out or blowing them out of proportion. Grace Kelly cannot hide her instinctive emotional reactions to people or situations, and she does not make any pretenses about her personal sympathies or antipathies.
    Grace Kelly has a childlike openness and playfulness which is very appealing to others, but which sometimes gets her into trouble, as Grace takes risks on impulse or whim. She is assertive and confronts difficulties in a direct, no-nonsense sort of way. Grace Kelly cannot tolerate self-pity or passivity, and she can be rather brusque with others' emotional problems. "Stop crying and do something about it" might be Kelly's motto.

    She enjoys emotional intensity and is attracted to the mysterious, the unknown, and dangerous or challenging experiences that draw on all of her inner resources. She is able to handle an emotional crisis very well and is interested in the underlying root of emotional problems and how to cure them. Grace Kelly insists on bringing feelings between people out into the open, for she craves real closeness and intimacy in her relationships, without barriers or secrets.

    She is hard-working and tends to work till she collapses. Forceful and aggressive, Grace Kelly comes on strong and has a tendency to be abusive when frustrated. Kelly must learn to relax in order to avoid suffering total emotional or physical exhaustion. She is subject to changing moods and tends to alternate between associating with others and being completely alone, seeking to regenerate herself in solitude. Grace Kelly seems to be too critical of herself and tends to generate distance from others.

    Grace Kelly is in harmony with herself and the world around her and is guided by her instincts. The parental type, she would like to solve everyone's problems. Very warm, sympathetic and cordial, Grace radiates harmony wherever she goes.

    Grace Kelly possesses the gifts of tact, courtesy and consideration, and has a strong desire to please and understand her love partner. Because she values harmony so highly, Grace Kelly will compromise a great deal to avoid any discord or conflict in her relationships. Grace does not like to dwell on controversial or emotional subjects and often tries to "smooth things over" or "sweep them under the rug".

    In love relationships, Grace Kelly wants an intellectual peer, an equal and a friend. She is attracted to people who have a certain finesse, delicacy and subtlety. Grace Kelly appreciates good manners and refinement and is not happy with coarseness or bluntness in a person.

    Grace Kelly often hides her affection, or finds her feelings difficult to express or get across to the person she loves. Being openly affectionate and trusting often does not seem safe to Grace. She may feel her love will not be appreciated or reciprocated. Grace Kelly may get involved in secret love relationships or fall in love with a person who is quite unavailable to her. Love and sacrifice often seem to go hand in hand for Grace Kelly - having to give something up to be with the one she loves, or having to relinquish some person or some aspect of an important love relationship. In love relationships and romance, it is important for Grace Kelly to be able to deeply respect her partner. Grace looks beyond the superficial qualities to see their inner worth (or lack thereof), before she lets herself really fall for someone. In fact, too much glamour or flashiness is something of a turn-off to her. Grace Kelly is capable of mature, lasting loving relationships and seeks a mate who is deep, loyal, and committed. She may be drawn to someone older than her
    edit, this would be a very positive description of the SLI instead of all the negative ones people seem to have.

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    Hmm, something is off here.

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    Grace Kelly sounds like a fully integrated ST/NF

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    The last part I guess is OK, but emotionally expressive and hard working - work until she drops? that kind of stuff doesn't sound SLI at all. But this description doesn't sound like any type really. I wonder who wrote this about her?
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    I think it can fit, especially for a female SLI. Alot of times you can see the HA and creative function pretty clearly in the same person. But the HA is more volatile. I know there are INFps who are more Ti heavy than Fe. So yeah.. FWIW you have always seemed delta to me. I don't see you use Ti in the active manner typical to Betas. You also have that grounded vibe which Si types give off.
    Last edited by crazedrat; 03-13-2011 at 01:26 PM.

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    Certain parts of it don't seem typical SLI but when I think of any other type for Grace Kelly, nothing else makes sense. And certain parts of that description are contradictory but I identify with nearly all of it. I think most of the SLI descriptions I've read so far have all been describing the male SLI and as someone said, I think this could fit very well for the female half.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    The last part I guess is OK, but emotionally expressive and hard working - work until she drops? that kind of stuff doesn't sound SLI at all. But this description doesn't sound like any type really. I wonder who wrote this about her?
    Yeah, they say she had a hard time expressing herself then they turn around and say she's emotionally expressive...

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    I think SLIs can INTERNALLY feel very emotionally expressive, but as far as outward expressiveness, they're generally pretty reserved. My husband has told me he was embarrassed about "losing it" and getting too emotional when we've left someplace, and he was completely off with his perception. He might say like three words to someone and think he was showing a lot of emotion. He can't judge how emotionally expressive he is being, I think.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker View Post
    I think SLIs can INTERNALLY feel very emotionally expressive, but as far as outward expressiveness, they're generally pretty reserved. My husband has told me he was embarrassed about "losing it" and getting too emotional when we've left someplace, and he was completely off with his perception. He might say like three words to someone and think he was showing a lot of emotion. He can't judge how emotionally expressive he is being, I think.
    haha, I feel like that all the time. Really, the only emotion I'm comfortable expressing is anger and I can easily show that so maybe that's what they meant? I don't know. I can't picture Grace Kelly ever coming apart though.

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    It also says she "must learn to relax". I wonder if the person who wrote this projected a bit when writing it? SLIs don't generally have to learn how to relax.

    To critical of self sounds very SLI - not just my husband but the SLIs in general I know are way too critical of themselves. They get much more angry at themselves for making mistakes than if other people make mistakes.

    Childlike openess and playfulness sounds like an infantile statemtent, but that could just mean Si/Ne valuing or something.

    Wants to solve problems sounds SLIish, like a caretaking thing, although it almost sounds like they're talking about solving like interpersonal relationship problems which doesn't sound so SLIish.

    Enjoys emotional intensity? That sounds like Fe valuing, but on the other hand, I'm moody and can get emotionally intense sometimes, and it just seems to amuse my husband. I think the anti-Fe thing in SLIs is more that they don't want their own emotions to be drawn out more than that they're bothered by emotional intensity.

    Anyway, mixed feelings about this description.
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    My dad is SLI.. he's a workaholic. He does need to learn to relax.

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    I've always been called a hardworker. How much energy I put forth depends on what kind of work I'm doing. But then again, i'd imagine it'd be the same for anyone. Find something you're passionate about and anyone could be hardworking, I don't think that's type related.

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    Well generally Ejs are more workaholics and Ips are the least like that, but it does depend on specifics. Like you said, if you're working on something you enjoy or think it necessary. I guess the trend is more that Ejs are busier, like keep themselves busy, more. SLIs usually conserve their energy, but then expend it when they think it's worthwhile to.
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    Umm, that's more of a description of an F type, probably Beta NF, not T. Although it sounds pretty idealistic in general, like one of those MBTI's "NF" descriptions.

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    The thing that's really irritating to me is that people think SLI's have the personality of a rock...whenever someone mentions they they can be soft-hearted and emotional or god forbid, expressive, it's quickly ruled out that they're SLI. Well I think that's innacurate. There is no other type I can be (I know i've gone thru them all, but I'm SLI for real) and I identify with that description almost 100% so maybe A) people who claim to know what a SLI is, really have never met a true SLI or B) they don't understand the functions correctly. It's frustrating when all I have to go by is a seemingly very male-based typing description that has us all out in the garage fixing our cars. It's such a simplistic description and it's so wrong. There's more to them than that.

    This description tends to contradict a lot of what I read about Kelly so when I say that she's SLI, I'm also taking those descriptions into consideration. She's generally thought of as very aloof and hard to get to know and generally unemotional.

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    The couple of SLIs i've known have been both hardworking and perfectionists. They just dont flaunt it and they have a talent at striking a balance between working and unwinding. But when they're at work, they are hard workers (I wouldn't call it workaholism though... I tend to be the workaholic because i get so stuck in what i'm doing and so innundated by details). Also i've noticed that SLIs work much harder when they have a goal to work towards. I guess i'm the same that way too.

    p.s. the description of Grace Kelly certainly did seem to have some descriptions of what i see in SLIs, but as you pointed out Jessica, did seem to contradict itself at times.
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    The thing that's really irritating to me is that people think SLI's have the personality of a rock...whenever someone mentions they they can be soft-hearted and emotional or god forbid, expressive, it's quickly ruled out that they're SLI. Well I think that's innacurate. There is no other type I can be (I know i've gone thru them all, but I'm SLI for real) and I identify with that description almost 100% so maybe A) people who claim to know what a SLI is, really have never met a true SLI or B) they don't understand the functions correctly. It's frustrating when all I have to go by is a seemingly very male-based typing description that has us all out in the garage fixing our cars. It's such a simplistic description and it's so wrong. There's more to them than that.

    This description tends to contradict a lot of what I read about Kelly so when I say that she's SLI, I'm also taking those descriptions into consideration. She's generally thought of as very aloof and hard to get to know and generally unemotional.

    Yeah exactly, i think aloof is a good way to put what i've observed too. I DEFINITELY think SLIs are emotional inside. But certainly i've seen SLIs break out into a lovely smile or laugh or be wacky. I dont think that's what Fe-POLR is about.
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    The thing that's really irritating to me is that people think SLI's have the personality of a rock...whenever someone mentions they they can be soft-hearted and emotional or god forbid, expressive, it's quickly ruled out that they're SLI. Well I think that's innacurate. There is no other type I can be (I know i've gone thru them all, but I'm SLI for real) and I identify with that description almost 100% so maybe A) people who claim to know what a SLI is, really have never met a true SLI or B) they don't understand the functions correctly. It's frustrating when all I have to go by is a seemingly very male-based typing description that has us all out in the garage fixing our cars. It's such a simplistic description and it's so wrong. There's more to them than that.

    This description tends to contradict a lot of what I read about Kelly so when I say that she's SLI, I'm also taking those descriptions into consideration. She's generally thought of as very aloof and hard to get to know and generally unemotional.
    Do you maybe think that you're some F type...?

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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkaholicsAnon View Post
    Yeah exactly, i think aloof is a good way to put what i've observed too. I DEFINITELY think SLIs are emotional inside. But certainly i've seen SLIs break out into a lovely smile or laugh or be wacky. I dont think that's what Fe-POLR is about.
    Smiling is generally not my default expression, but I have absolutely no problem smiling and laughing and joking around....that's generally how I communicate most of the time with people but then again I'm shy and it's sort of a nervous habit I'm trying to break.

    Singularity, there's no way I'm an F type. No chance.

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    NOT SLI

    Fe values all over that description

    Jess, you ain't no goddamn Delta. It's not that SLIs don't have feelings, or even that people think that; rather, it's that you are finding, and mentally exacerbating, the parts of SLIs that AREN'T like you. SLIs are usually pretty chill people, they don't value intensity and fieriness the same way you do. Not to say they don't feel some things intensely, but Deltas are, as a rule, generally suspicious of identifying with, and acting on, their more fiery impulses. Everything about that description you posted reeks of Fe values, so I can only guess that your identification with it is based on what seems most pronounced, but I could be wrong; would you be willing to single out the key phrases that really speak to you, and maybe talk more about exactly what speaks to you?
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly View Post
    Fe values all over that description
    Okay could you show me where?

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    I've been trying to find a good example of a real SLI woman and often read about Grace Kelly being type as such. I stumbled upon this description and identified with it so much. Word for word, it's me. I wanted to know if any other SLI's agree? Basically just take out Grace Kelly and replace it with SLI and see if this description works...



    edit, this would be a very positive description of the SLI instead of all the negative ones people seem to have.
    I really like this.

    And not just for the SLI women.

    I do realize that it is contradictory to other SLI profiles and that’s partly why I like it. I’m pretty sure that if you ask any SLI if they ever felt misunderstood the answer will be yes. I think that the normal “cold and calm and unemotional” SLI descriptions are very right, sometimes a bit too right ha ha. But that doesn’t mean that this one can’t be right too. How they come across just depends on the circumstances and the people the SLI is interacting with. This description makes it more nuanced and more accurate imo. They are people after all.

    It’s funny cuz I actually agree with everything. I just think that this is how a SLI is deep inside, and how they see themselves. When you read it, it really is sweet really. A bit naïve even, and that’s why it’s a side of them that they have learned to keep safe from others.
    The thing is, that it’s also what I see in them. Or recognize to be more exact, cuz it’s how I am inside too. Ha ha DUALZ

    I read it having a non SLI in mind too, just for kicks and it didn’t fit. So I don’t think it’s something that applies to everyone.

    As a side note, my SLI brother has on more than one occasion stated that “he was just like me”. This always makes me laugh cuz honestly we are nothing alike! But I know what he means and he’s right. We have the same values and we want the same things out of life and relationships.
    n00bIEE

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    The description sounds most like ESE in my view.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo View Post
    I really like this.

    And not just for the SLI women.

    I do realize that it is contradictory to other SLI profiles and that’s partly why I like it. I’m pretty sure that if you ask any SLI if they ever felt misunderstood the answer will be yes. I think that the normal “cold and calm and unemotional” SLI descriptions are very right, sometimes a bit too right ha ha. But that doesn’t mean that this one can’t be right too. How they come across just depends on the circumstances and the people the SLI is interacting with. This description makes it more nuanced and more accurate imo. They are people after all.

    It’s funny cuz I actually agree with everything. I just think that this is how a SLI is deep inside, and how they see themselves. When you read it, it really is sweet really. A bit naïve even, and that’s why it’s a side of them that they have learned to keep safe from others.
    The thing is, that it’s also what I see in them. Or recognize to be more exact, cuz it’s how I am inside too. Ha ha DUALZ

    I read it having a non SLI in mind too, just for kicks and it didn’t fit. So I don’t think it’s something that applies to everyone.

    As a side note, my SLI brother has on more than one occasion stated that “he was just like me”. This always makes me laugh cuz honestly we are nothing alike! But I know what he means and he’s right. We have the same values and we want the same things out of life and relationships.
    Yeah, I think a lot of the descriptions out there are how others view them and how they come across and they are accurate--I do agree with some of them but as you said, there's more to it than those descriptions would lead you to believe. That's why In the past, I felt like SLI made no sense for me sometimes because those descriptions portray them to be a person with zero feelings, not much of a personality and an inability to care about much..I think the description I posted is honestly how I feel inside and not many people would know that based on how I project myself.

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    This is all Fe or F in general:

    Grace Kelly has an understanding of other people's feelings and needs which borders on telepathy.

    Because of her kindness, people suffering from pain or confusion are drawn to Kelly for help, which she readily gives.

    She is emotionally expressive and often dramatizes her feelings, acting them out or blowing them out of proportion. Grace Kelly cannot hide her instinctive emotional reactions to people or situations, and she does not make any pretenses about her personal sympathies or antipathies.

    She enjoys emotional intensity

    She is interested in the underlying root of emotional problems and how to cure them.

    Grace Kelly insists on bringing feelings between people out into the open, for she craves real closeness and intimacy in her relationships, without barriers or secrets. (This is more Se/Ni)

    Very warm, sympathetic and cordial, Grace radiates harmony wherever she goes.

    Grace Kelly possesses the gifts of tact, courtesy and consideration

    Because she values harmony so highly, Grace Kelly will compromise a great deal to avoid any discord or conflict in her relationships. Grace does not like to dwell on controversial or emotional subjects and often tries to "smooth things over" or "sweep them under the rug".

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    OK I just read all the responses in this thread and it really annoys me that ppl think SLIs don’t have feelings. WTF. They are prollly the most vulnerable sensitive people around
    n00bIEE

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    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo View Post
    OK I just read all the responses in this thread and it really annoys me that ppl think SLIs don’t have feelings. WTF. They are prollly the most vulnerable sensitive people around
    THIS.

    Basically this is my entire issue I have with people and their SLI descriptions. Maybe that description I posted was going a little overboard, but it's not far off from me. I'm probably more sensitive than anyone I've ever met but people just don't see that so that's why I thought that was a good description. Maybe it is describing someone who is more visually expressive, but if you turn it around, that's how I feel on the inside.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Singularity View Post
    This is all Fe or F in general:
    Grace Kelly has an understanding of other people's feelings and needs which borders on telepathy.
    When it comes to physical pain and suffering SLI's are way more compassionate than me

    Because of her kindness, people suffering from pain or confusion are drawn to Kelly for help, which she readily gives.
    Yup. All the SLIs I know are naturally loved/liked by children, because of this. When all is to hectic there is no safer place than next to a SLI

    She is emotionally expressive and often dramatizes her feelings, acting them out or blowing them out of proportion. Grace Kelly cannot hide her instinctive emotional reactions to people or situations, and she does not make any pretenses about her personal sympathies or antipathies.
    it also says:
    Grace Kelly often hides her affection, or finds her feelings difficult to express or get across to the person she loves. Being openly affectionate and trusting often does not seem safe to Grace. She may feel her love will not be appreciated or reciprocated...

    the thing with working the descriptions is that you have have to read them with a person in mind and be willing to read the meaning and not just the words. Most sentences can be applied to different types anyways. Si would never have made sense if I didn't have a real life SLI "as reference"


    She enjoys emotional intensity
    again yes. Just because Fi is subtle and not in your face doesn't mean that it is passionless. I'm sure Fi valuers think it's the other way around. And remember Fi is not for other eyes

    She is interested in the underlying root of emotional problems and how to cure them.
    Yeah. My SLIs all are very aware and updated on my moods (that I don't even understand my self) and will say things like eat or sleep...

    Grace Kelly insists on bringing feelings between people out into the open, for she craves real closeness and intimacy in her relationships, without barriers or secrets. (This is more Se/Ni)
    I don't know what IEs this falls under, but I know that SLIs (and IEEs) think this way. In fact it's probably what Fi is all about

    Very warm, sympathetic and cordial, Grace radiates harmony wherever she goes.
    OK I can see why you would pick this one out. I think it depends on who you are. In the beginning I was sure my bf was ISFp because of the above. But then I realized that he was only this way with me. Guess it just comes down to him being comfortable with me and me appreciating him

    Grace Kelly possesses the gifts of tact, courtesy and consideration

    Because she values harmony so highly, Grace Kelly will compromise a great deal to avoid any discord or conflict in her relationships. Grace does not like to dwell on controversial or emotional subjects and often tries to "smooth things over" or "sweep them under the rug".


    this is a SLI in a relationship
    n00bIEE

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    dattebayo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    THIS.

    Basically this is my entire issue I have with people and their SLI descriptions. Maybe that description I posted was going a little overboard, but it's not far off from me. I'm probably more sensitive than anyone I've ever met but people just don't see that so that's why I thought that was a good description. Maybe it is describing someone who is more visually expressive, but if you turn it around, that's how I feel on the inside.
    I don't think it is overboard at all. I honestly think you guys are the most vulnerable and sensitive of all the types (I think I have said this just a minute ago? ) My bf is like this all the time. i can see that he's full of stuff he wants me to know, but then when he tries to express it verbally he gets all insecure ha ha . And then I always laugh and say that he doesn't need to say it, cuz I already know anyways

    besides action speaks louder than words, and SLIs are best expressing themselves through deeds and stuff
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    you can go to where your heart is Galen's Avatar
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    I've been looking over Grace Kelly for a bit since the buzz went around of her being the archetypal female ISTp, and I think I could believe it. Here's an interview for better reference:




    Also, all this talk about "emotional intensity" sounds more like an sx stacking thing than anything else. I definitely understand and strive for emotional intensity personally, and I know Fe egos who don't.

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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo View Post
    OK I just read all the responses in this thread and it really annoys me that ppl think SLIs don’t have feelings. WTF. They are prollly the most vulnerable sensitive people around
    I dont think that. And I can see their vulnerability.

    I think Fe-valuers more easily think so about SLIs because they dont "see" the feelings that they expect. And according to them, if you're not showing the feelings, the feelings dont exist. At least that's my understanding.
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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Galen View Post
    I've been looking over Grace Kelly for a bit since the buzz went around of her being the archetypal female ISTp, and I think I could believe it. Here's an interview for better reference:

    YouTube - The last interview with Grace Kelly - on ABC's 20/20 (Part 1 of 6)


    Also, all this talk about "emotional intensity" sounds more like an sx stacking thing than anything else. I definitely understand and strive for emotional intensity personally, and I know Fe egos who don't.
    I was also going to add that Fi-valuers can be more emotionally intense than Fe-valuers sometimes, it's just in a different way. A more internal sort of intensity.

    It's sort of like Fe-valuers and Fi-valuers speak different emotional languages.
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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo View Post
    Grace Kelly has an understanding of other people's feelings and needs which borders on telepathy.
    When it comes to physical pain and suffering SLI's are way more compassionate than me
    I agree 2000%.

    Two SLIs i worked with put my degree of empathy and compassion (which is a great priority to me) to shame. But you wouldn't know it, unless you worked closely with them and got to witness it for yourself.

    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo
    Because of her kindness, people suffering from pain or confusion are drawn to Kelly for help, which she readily gives.
    Yup. All the SLIs I know are naturally loved/liked by children, because of this. When all is to hectic there is no safer place than next to a SLI
    I have not had experience with the SLIs in my life + children, so i can't really comment, but i did see a photo of one of them dancing in a circle with a few little 5 year old girls at a wedding. It was so CUTE!!!

    Again, it's the sort of thing that you wouldn't think they would be good at, just knowing them in day-to-day life.


    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo
    She is emotionally expressive and often dramatizes her feelings, acting them out or blowing them out of proportion. Grace Kelly cannot hide her instinctive emotional reactions to people or situations, and she does not make any pretenses about her personal sympathies or antipathies.
    it also says:
    Grace Kelly often hides her affection, or finds her feelings difficult to express or get across to the person she loves. Being openly affectionate and trusting often does not seem safe to Grace. She may feel her love will not be appreciated or reciprocated...

    the thing with working the descriptions is that you have have to read them with a person in mind and be willing to read the meaning and not just the words. Most sentences can be applied to different types anyways. Si would never have made sense if I didn't have a real life SLI "as reference"
    That first part is what throws me off. It just doesn't ring true for me ime with SLIs. In particular the "often dramatizes her feelings, acting them out or blowing them out of proportion". Acting out could be, but i dont know about dramatizing things or blowing them out of proportion. Maybe i just haven't know the SLIs well enough to tell...

    The rest of it does fit though. The part about hiding her feelings and being afraid that they wont be reciprocated sounds like Fi-HA and Fe-POLR.

    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo
    She enjoys emotional intensity
    again yes. Just because Fi is subtle and not in your face doesn't mean that it is passionless. I'm sure Fi valuers think it's the other way around. And remember Fi is not for other eyes
    Yes this is exactly what i was trying to get at in my previous post. Fi-valuers are capable of immense emotional intensity, just not the superficial kind that the Fe-valuers like to throw around among each other.

    I like how you put "Fi is not for other eyes." very very VERY true. I relate.

    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo
    Very warm, sympathetic and cordial, Grace radiates harmony wherever she goes.
    OK I can see why you would pick this one out. I think it depends on who you are. In the beginning I was sure my bf was ISFp because of the above. But then I realized that he was only this way with me. Guess it just comes down to him being comfortable with me and me appreciating him
    This is something i've also observed in the 2 SLIs i've worked closely with.

    Quote Originally Posted by dattebayo
    Grace Kelly possesses the gifts of tact, courtesy and consideration

    Because she values harmony so highly, Grace Kelly will compromise a great deal to avoid any discord or conflict in her relationships. Grace does not like to dwell on controversial or emotional subjects and often tries to "smooth things over" or "sweep them under the rug".


    this is a SLI in a relationship
    You know, it's funny--ime they have this talent at making awkward situations a win-win. I think it's because they use their Te to problem-solve the issue, and of course they have that Fi-HA as a motivating factor.

    But i hear you about SLIs being stuck in relationships for this reason. I think it's also why they're slow and hesitant about getting into a relationship too.
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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Jessica, if you're like Grace Kelly's description, i would love to be friends with u.

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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkaholicsAnon View Post
    Jessica, if you're like Grace Kelly's description, i would love to be friends with u.



    I always thought it was funny about the kid thing. I don't know what it is, but kids always get really attached to me. I think it's cool, kids are interesting. I think maybe it's because I don't treat them like they're kids, I treat them like equals which is really probably hilarious to whoever listens to the convo...talking to them like they're little adults.

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    dattebayo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    Is there a downside to SLIs?
    yeah if you want there to be. A lot of stuff depends on view and what you choose to focus on
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    First of all, Grace Kelly was no ESE. I think her general typing of SLI is correct.

    Second, we don't know who wrote this and how well they knew her. I mean it could be someone who knew her very well and with whom she'd talked about her internal feelings a lot?

    Third, the "emotional intensity" thing is what throws it off SLI the most, but again SLIs can be very emotionally instense inside, and they can misjudge how much they are showing, which is maybe why they're often so reserved. And they don't mind emotional intenisty in others or they wouldn't get together and stay together with us IEEs.

    And it isnt' like they're always robotic. My husband is GENERALLY very quiet and reserved, but he's also affectionate and plays all the time with our kids, he jokes around and teases and all that stuff. Not so much around strangers though - he isn't that open around everyone. And my husband specifically doesn't really get very angry, but I don't think how angry someone gets is type related. How people deal with their anger to some extent could be, but anger comes from outside circumstances and things often.

    Like maybe one of her kids wrote this, you know? If my daughter wrote about her dad, she's probably say he's silly and likes to play games.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    Is there a downside to SLIs?
    Plenty of downsides.

    They tend to "go with the flow" too much especially with people they are very close to, even if it means hanging out with the wrong crowd, going to get drunk too often, speaking like a fool, making retarded spelling mistakes even though they know how to spell, just to seem cool.

    They are not great judges of character (this goes for LSEs too).

    They tend to overindulge in sensory pleasures (drinking, debauchery) if they hang around those sorts of friends who got them started on that.

    they SWEAR!!!! Again, more so if they hang around friends who encourage it. But the SLIs take it to a whole new extreme, it's like they RUN with it.

    They can be rude.
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    Well, I think that the "PCness" is skewing the perception (yeah, I'm guilty of doing this too...), which I think basically leads to misunderstandings and mistypings. But if you ask any T types, most of them will tell you that they don't really understand others' emotions, or even give a shit about them, lol (although some F types could be like that, too).

    If you relate to that description, whether you are a female or not, then I don't see how you could possibly be a T type, not least bit an SLI, a Fe-PoLR type...

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    Breaking stereotypes Suz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Singularity View Post
    If you relate to that description, whether you are a female or not, then I don't see how you could possibly be a T type, not least bit an SLI, a Fe-PoLR type...
    I dont see how you could possibly come to such a retarded conclusion.
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