View Poll Results: VOTE OR DIE! (or take your time)

Voters
16. You may not vote on this poll
  • Intuitive-Ethical Intratim - INFp (The Lyricist)

    9 56.25%
  • Ethical-Intuitive Extratim - ENFj (The Performer)

    1 6.25%
  • Ethical-Intuitive Intratim - INFj (The Psychologist)

    3 18.75%
  • Sensory-Logical Intratim - ISTp (The Craftsman)

    2 12.50%
  • Intuitive-Ethical Extratim - ENFp (The Initiator)

    0 0%
  • Intuitive-Logical Extratim - ENTp (The Seeker)

    1 6.25%
  • Sensory-Ethical Intratim - ISFp (The Epicurean)

    0 0%
  • Logical-Intuitive Intratim - INTj (The Warrior Intellectual)

    0 0%
  • Intuitive-Logical Intratim - INTp (The Critic)

    0 0%
  • Sensory-Ethical Extratim - ESFp (The Leader)

    0 0%
  • Sensory-Logical Extratim - ESTp (The Organizer)

    0 0%
  • Logical-Sensory Intratim - ISTj (The Structurist)

    0 0%
  • Ethical-Sensory Intratim - ISFj (The Conservator)

    0 0%
  • Ethical-Sensory Extratim - ESFj (The Bon Vivant)

    0 0%
  • Logical-Sensory Extratim - ESTj (The Professional)

    0 0%
  • Logical-Intuitive Extratim - ENTj (The Entrepreneur)

    0 0%
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 40 of 49

Thread: What's My Type Again? (Version 20) End of Line, End of Charade?

  1. #1
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default What's My Type Again? (Version 2.0) [End of Line, End of Charade?]

    As of yet I'm not really sure what to say. Yet I guess I require the brilliant intellectual minds of the men and women here to affirm my self-typing. If you don't think I'm IEI please tell me why.
    Last edited by HERO; 01-09-2012 at 06:19 AM.

  2. #2
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Just so you know, I got a job recently -- part-time at a grocery store. And if there are any responses to this thread I will be reading them and responding to them. Plus I'll start reading more stuff in general on this site, including more responses to things I write; and of course since some of them (my posts) might be written when I'm not in a good (emotional et al.) state and/or haven't had enough sleep, I'd imagine they might not always elicit the best (most congenial) attention, if any, so to speak.

    Anyway, I've made a youtube account, and for the first time I've tried to upload a video, yet it doesn't seem to be working. I've tried it a lot of times. Perhaps I might have to buy some software or something. I can't say technology is really my strong point. Although if I ever were to seriously study science it would probably have to be physics and quantum mechanics and stuff like that. I'd have to improve my Math first and finish high school. Speaking of which, I'll probably be going back to school soon, and I might try the Internet or something this time instead of some continuing education place (which I went to for about a year when I was living in British Columbia). I'll see.



    Favorite TV Show of all time: PSI FACTOR: CHRONICLES OF THE PARANORMAL

    Favorite female characters from PSI FACTOR: Lindsay Donner, Dr. Claire Davison, Mia Stone

    Favorite male characters from PSI FACTOR: Michael Kelly, Dr. Anton Hendricks, Cryptozoologist Lennox Q. Cooper (or L. Q. Cooper), Case Manager Matt Praeger, Physicist Peter Axon, Case Manager Dr. Curtis Rollins


    Favorite female characters from Battlestar Galactica (re-imagining): Boomer “Boomer” Valerii (and Sharon “Athena” Agathon), Kara “Starbuck” Thrace, Ellen Tigh

    Favorite male characters from Battlestar Galactica (re-imagining): Karl “Helo” Agathon, Lee “Apollo” Adama; Gaius Baltar


    Favorite female characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Faith, Anya [Ni-ENFj], Drusilla, Willow Rosenberg, Cordelia Chase, Joyce Summers

    Favorite male characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Spike, Angel


    Favorite female characters from Desperate Housewives: Gabrielle Solis, Nora Huntington; Beth Young, Bree, Lynette, Susan, etc.

    Favorite male characters from Desperate Housewives: Mike Delfino


    Favorite female character from The Bridge: Billy (portrayed by Theresa Joy)
    Last edited by HERO; 01-09-2012 at 06:23 AM.

  3. #3
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'll be adding some extra info now/soon, and hopefully at least one video eventually, I guess. Just so people know, I won't be upset whether or not people think I'm IEI (some do, some don't). It doesn't bother me anymore what people think of my type. I'm just curious if anyone has an opinion. I guess I'd like some sort of assessments and/or feedback so to speak.

    In addition, I'd like to apologize for my aberrant, rude, and disrespectful behaviors and I realize that 'antisocial' offenses like that are destructive and counterproductive, and that acting out is unethical and evil.


    Reasons I might Be INFp (IEI)
    1. Introversion gives me an excuse/reason to be shy, socially awkward/challenged, ‘asocial’, isolated, lonely, etc. Even if the “I” doesn’t give me carte blanche to be like that, at least it might explain it.

    http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.p...roverted_types

    “Energy level is generally lower.
    More often focused on their thoughts and feelings.
    Tend to be more passive, less initiating.
    Often do not have many friends.”

    My energy is usually not too high. Yet I once went for a blood analysis at some holistic/vitamin/supplement/etc. store, and the guy said that I have parasitized red blood cells. He said there might have been a time of extreme stress when my immune system was compromised or something (circa 2006). I never told him about Zyprexa though. Either way, he said that parasitized red blood cells can contribute to fatigue, an increase in colds/flus, etc. Plus he said that I might also have acidosis, candida (IBS), and that my digestion probably isn’t that great. And of course it often isn’t; I should probably try going on a candida diet and low acid diet or something (more alkaline foods). Plus he said that my second chakra, heart chakra (among others) are blocked or something.
    I am quite often focused on my thoughts and feelings. I do tend to be more passive and less initiating. And I don’t have many friends.

    2. Intuition gives me an excuse for having my head in the clouds, daydreaming, for not being an expert when it comes to dealing with practical stuff, tangible reality, the physical world.

    3. Feeling/Ethics (especially Fe) gives me a reason/excuse to be hyper-emotional and hypersensitive, which I am at times, although I often don’t show my feelings, and I rarely cry. Nevertheless, sometimes if I want something I have to have it. Although I should be more concerned about my health as opposed to say the rare milkshake or root beer float, if you know what I mean. Anyway, I guess this disease of being a spoiled brat, and practically making scenes (which has actually become more and more rare for me, fortunately), or complaining about things, probably leached into any other relationships/friendships I had, and made me ‘infamous’ for being emotionally volatile/unstable yet at times ebullient and passionate, crazy, ‘effeminate’ (although my Aunt didn’t think I’m ‘effeminate’, my stepdad did), “passive-aggressive and neurotic”, ‘hypersensitive’, “fragile”, ‘emotionally feminine’, “manic-depressive”, [yet ironically for the most part quiet, distant, expressionless, etc.] etc. up to the point where my behaviors made it impossible for me to maintain friendships or relationships with relatively average and/or normal people who were scared of me, disappointed, or just couldn’t take it anymore; and conversely, with the more delinquent, criminal, and/or ‘marginal’ types, they (generally) viewed me as weak and defenseless, a good target or an annoying intruder in their world, someone who is needy, intelligent yet tries to talk about feelings they don’t understand, someone who beats himself up a lot so to speak, a coward, someone from a different ‘world’, who never had any major drug addiction, never had to steal from people, was ‘over-protected’, etc.

    http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.p...#Ethical_types

    ‘More vulnerable to "logical" manipulation.’

    I think that in reality I am quite vulnerable to “logical” manipulation.

    4. Irrationality gives me an ‘excuse’ for being disorganized. And to be honest, I’m not good at time management at work, school, in general. Although I try hard to fulfill my duties at work (and I clean washrooms/toilets, collect baskets, sometimes shovel snow, take carts from outside and vice versa, sweep, mop, help with bagging, etc.) at home my Mom complains that I don’t really help with chores and cleaning that much. It’s something I have to work on – cleaning, being more organized, doing more chores at home – so that I can be better at work and in life in general. Even my Aunt once told me that I have to put my inner world in order and start respecting people. Yet in the outside world (at work for example) I’m usually quite quiet, compliant, meek, kind of ‘disabled’ or ‘retarded’. I remember this one girl in Grade 10 who asked me if I’m “slow”.

    5. There was this guy (I think he might be ESTp or ENTp Harmonizing or Normalizing) who visited me once – it was somewhat romantic or whatever yet nothing too serious (and if there’s still a ‘relationship’ it’s long-distance (to be honest I don’t think I really like him enough for there to be any relationship) – he thought that I look like an INFp (IEI). I showed him these pictures:

    http://www.socioniko.net/ru/type-foto/te-fil.html

    Specifically, he thought I look a bit like the guy in the center far-right. [So if it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck.]

    6. http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.1.types/te.html

    ‘A somewhat idealistic romanticist. He is a person prone more to reflection than action. An individualist. He is little concerned with the present; he is more excited by brilliant perspectives of "bright cities, which may be built one day".’

    I actually relate to this a fair bit.

    7. My Mom said, “Who can love you when you’re so f*****g annoying [stupid, retarded, etc.]?”

    8. http://www.socionics.com/prof/infp2.htm

    The part about me being quite easy to brainwash, I suppose my Aunt would’ve probably agreed, especially regarding some stuff from the past I guess.

    9. http://www.socionics.com/advan/prof/infp.htm

    “You often complain about your emotional and physical state. Eventually you can cause people to tire of you and even doubt your honesty concerning your well being.”

    I can see how a lot of people might perceive me this way since it’s probably sort of how I really am. While I don’t lie, sometimes I do complain. Yet in real life I don’t complain to people who aren’t really close to me. So that leaves my Mom. Yet I don’t really complain that much about stuff – some, if not all, are facts of my (current) existence which could possibly be changed or altered I suppose… Yet on the Internet, which I guess I can abuse, I don’t always act like I do in the real world (quiet, meek, ‘disabled’, ‘monosyllabic’, etc.) so people might think I’m excessive, or that that’s my true self or whatever (when perhaps it’s just another social alter or mask hiding something else I guess).

    10. I relate to a lot or almost everything in the Romantic description in Filatova’s book “Understanding the people around you”. Just for the most part I wouldn’t really consider myself graceful or elegant. And I’m not really that interested in clothes. More often than not my Mom chooses them.
    Yet it is true that I’m shy around strangers. That I’m relatively tactful and polite. And that I can be rude with family and/or at home, with people close to me. That’s true. I definitely tend to swear more when I’m at home and/or not with strangers or people I’m not too close to. (Sometimes I use the “F” word or whatever too much.)
    And I guess I like to think that I can predict things. There have been times where I have predicted things without even knowing. My ex-boyfriend’s psychic said I’m “psychic” – I just don’t have enough control or awareness (and I don’t know how to use it correctly, or for good, the light). A psychic I once went to said that I’m bordering on being telepathic. She also said that I’m an Enneagram 4 which fits with INFp. Another psychic said that I’m probably Introverted (and Intuitive) I think.
    I often daydream, and I’m quite imaginative. And it’s true that I like to have an ideal system to believe in, and that if one fails I replace it with another.
    I am gullible. I do have a tendency to hesitate when I have to choose something.
    Nevertheless this is one thing I can’t really relate to. Maybe it’s because of all the problems I’ve amassed throughout adolescence.
    Here’s a quotation from Understanding The People Around You: An Introduction To Socionics by Ekaterina Filatova. It’s regarding the INFp.

    Ekaterina Filatova, Understanding The People Around You: An Introduction To Socionics (Hollister: MSI Press, 2006), 46:

    - p. 46 [THE ROMANTIC: Intuitive-Feeling Introvert (IFI)]: “Romantics are capable of being very sweet, effortlessly socializing with large groups, and complimenting people in order to leave a good impression (Si).

    I wish I could be like this, but I doubt it. I don’t think it’s in my power. But who knows.

    11. http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.p...overted_ethics
    “IEIs can get strong physical sensations of their own internal feelings which pressures them into retreating to their personal boundaries. These sensations range from minor head pains to stomach aches and take place especially when they fall behind due to external pressures. When they do withdraw, they can take many hours reflecting over the problems stressing them, and as a result IEIs can remain reclusive. They can even feel like they're in a nightmare when they cannot resolve the things that are plaguing their minds.”

    I can relate to this quite a bit. I can especially remember times in the past where some of this relates to how I felt. I guess my ‘psychosomatic’ and health problems can also account for it.

    12. I like a couple of David Lynch’s movies. Mulholland Drive is my favorite. And out of all his other movies, I’d say Inland Empire comes second. I also liked the Twin Peaks series. Yet I find most of his other stuff to be either too boring, disturbing, rarefied, arid, confusing, or depressing. In addition it’s safe to say that movies rarely make me cry, although my Mom sometimes cries at the end of a movie depending on how she feels. For me I might just get some tears in my eyes if something really impressed me. Nevertheless, I’m not convinced that my Mom is an Fe-type anymore (I did think she might be Fe-ENFj); I’m starting to think she’s Gamma SF [and there’s a good chance she might even be Fi-ESFp (or Fi-ISFj, D-ESI)]. When I read her some type descriptions from Filatova’s book, namely the ENFj and ESFj ones, she didn’t really relate to them that much. Yet she seemed to relate to the ISFj one more, and I didn’t really get the chance to read that much from the ESFp description, although there’s quite a bit of stuff written about the ESFp that seems to pertain to her. Yet I’m pretty sure that if she were ESFp, she’d be Fi-ESFp.
    Anyway, back to the movie stuff. I wanted to say that even with Mulholland Drive I still sometimes get distracted or fail to pay attention (or in other words I can be kind of detached from what I'm viewing: either analyzing or criticizing it while I'm viewing it or not paying attention). Could this mean that Introverted Intuition evokes and triggers boredom and malaise within me, or that I just haven’t adequately cultivated my base/strong function(s), etc.

    13. Here’s a quotation from Understanding The People Around You: An Introduction To Socionics by Ekaterina Filatova. It’s regarding the INFp.

    Ekaterina Filatova, Understanding The People Around You: An Introduction To Socionics (Hollister: MSI Press, 2006), 45:

    - p. 45 [THE ROMANTIC: Intuitive-Feeling Introvert (IFI)]: “He is a good indicator of other people’s possibilities and perspectives. He is like a weathercock pointing to those who are about to be successful. His attitude to you is a faultless signal whether you are OK or you are losing tempo.

    Just thought this was a cool quote, and I think it complements the ESTp quite well (meaning that it makes sense that the INFp dualizes with the ESTp).


    Last but not least, this is my favorite song lately:



    "In The Dark Places" [C# minor (Scorpio)] by PJ Harvey: "So our young men/Hid with guns/In the dirt/And in the dark places/Our young men/Hid with guns/In the dirt/And in the dark places/Our young men/Hid with guns/In the forests/And in the dark places/And not one man has/And not one woman has/Revealed the secrets/Of this world"
    Last edited by HERO; 02-21-2011 at 07:56 AM.

  4. #4
    Filambee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Location
    Brooklyn, NY
    TIM
    ENTp or ILE
    Posts
    116
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Are you really attracted to outgoing, flirty girls?
    Are you high sensitive to people's body language and tone of voice?
    Do you ever find yourself obsessing about possibly morally wrong actions you've made in the past?
    Can you tolerate people that implement nonsense rules so they can feel in control of their world?

  5. #5
    Hello...? somavision's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    London
    Posts
    1,474
    Mentioned
    8 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Filambee View Post
    Are you really attracted to outgoing, flirty girls?
    Are you high sensitive to people's body language and tone of voice?
    Do you ever find yourself obsessing about possibly morally wrong actions you've made in the past?
    Can you tolerate people that implement nonsense rules so they can feel in control of their world?
    Do you ask loaded questions often?
    IEE-Ne

  6. #6
    EffyCold The Ineffable's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Wallachia
    TIM
    ILE
    Posts
    2,195
    Mentioned
    13 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by somavision View Post
    Do you ask loaded questions often?
    ?? Could you enlighten an ignorant?
    Shock intuition, diamond logic.
     

    The16types.info Scientific Model

  7. #7
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Filambee View Post
    Are you really attracted to outgoing, flirty girls?
    Are you high sensitive to people's body language and tone of voice?
    Do you ever find yourself obsessing about possibly morally wrong actions you've made in the past?
    Can you tolerate people that implement nonsense rules so they can feel in control of their world?
    I'm hoping these questions could potentially help with typing me, so I'll try.

    1. Are you really attracted to outgoing, flirty girls?

    Well, first of all I'm gay (and a guy), yet I have occasionally been attracted to women or had crushes on them. As a general rule, most of the girls (or guys) I've been attracted to weren't necessarily what you'd call outgoing or flirty. A lot of them could be quite social, yet at the same time also quite 'serious', maybe somewhat shy, they liked reading/music/and/or school, etc. The girl I had a crush on once wasn't exactly what you'd call outgoing and flirty, she was kind of the opposite. She didn't really like to waste words in conversation, and sometimes she'd be annoyed by me, or say that I'm weird.
    And I guess, most of the guys I like aren't really outgoing, are rather quiet, laconic, yet they like music, maybe play guitar, stuff like that. I guess when regarding both males and females, I'd prefer someone who is artistic, and someone who plays music, sings, and/or writes music. And/or someone who reads.
    I guess the guy who stole from me was a bit of an exception to this rule. He seemed quite outgoing, yet troubled. He seemed quite Extraverted, yet liked to say that he was hard to get. I don't think he ever actually flirted with me. And now that I'm a bit more mature, I usually prefer the quieter less intimidating types. Maybe I liked the character of Faith, yet it was probably for the character arc. And the girl at the psychiatric rehab, wasn't exactly very outgoing and flirty. She seemed extraverted I guess, and she was quite negative in some ways, and I guess was often considered trouble by a lot of people. Yet I sympathized with her.

    2. Are you highly sensitive to people's body language and tone of voice?

    To be honest I'm not sure if I'm good at reading people's body language. I don't think I pay attention to that too often. Maybe I'm too self-absorbed or something. Regarding tone of voice, it's hard to say. I'm sometimes aware of my tone of voice. I'm not sure how aware I am of (other) people's tone of voice, especially if I don't know them too well. I don't think it's something I think about too often.
    Sometimes, in public and/or at work, I might say "Hello" or they might say "Hello" first, and they might also ask me how I am. And I'll always answer with "Good." That's it. And I never ask them how they are doing. It's probably something I should start doing I guess. But that's how socially challenged I am. And at the same time, perhaps that doesn't just illustrate how socially impaired I am, but also how very little interested I am in social matters and small talk, for example.
    Yet in the past, especially when I was younger and had friends, I could be quite social and enthusiastic, talking about different subjects, etc. I remember there was a phase when I was in elementary school when we thought we could be witches or wiccans or whatever. And plus I remember how sensitive I could be at times, and that sometimes I talked too much, which sometimes annoyed people. Or sometimes it was my singing. A lot of my friends were girls.

    3. Do you ever find yourself obsessing about possibly morally wrong actions you've made in the past?

    To be honest, sometimes, but not too often. I sometimes feel guilty about stuff, and it might just be a memory or something else that triggers it. [I can agonize about mistakes I've made at times; worry about how my actions may have affected people, and the like...] Yet more often than not, what bothers me in life is being dumped, or being betrayed, and what other people did or said. I know that sounds bad, but I like to feel like I'm right and stuff, and that other people hurt me or did worse stuff (in real life), so why should I feel bad about anything. [Although, often times I'm worried about seeing myself or being seen as worse than others.]
    Sometimes things I did do bother me. Yet often it might just be because something I did might have ruined a potential friendship or relationship, or because I humiliated myself, or because I don't have any friends, or because I have been ostracized, or because my Mom is my only friend, or because things I did turned out really bad for me, etc. [In other words I might not feel guilty about my actions (which I may have seen as justified at the time; or simply what's done is done, what can I do about it now); I feel bad about the results.] So maybe I really feel bad because of the absence of something (or because of the consequences, the new presense of something bad); and of course there were times when I may have been reactionary/reactive, or may have schemed, or may have acted out, or been (self-)destructive, been melodramatic, tried to take revenge on someone (that was maybe just one time), been dishonest, or disrespectful; yet in reality I often felt that I had lost control, or I had to do it to try to attain something, or it was a unconscious desperate act to deal with my bruised ego or something. Like, when you're panicking that someone has deceived you or has all the power, and if you have the opportunity to prove them wrong; or when you feel like you can't be yourself and people don't understand who you are, so you lose control, when things build up, and act crazy; or you just can't be there. There are no excuses for certain behaviors I guess, yet I can sort of understand why I acted in certain ways, or did certain things in my life. I guess I felt trapped.
    I'm trying my best not to be like that anymore. I haven't vandalized anything, or been involved in any mischief or criminal activity. I'm not bringing people to my Mom's place. I'm not acting crazy for the most part. Yet sometimes when I haven't had enough sleep for example, I feel the hypersensitivity and anger building within me, and I try my best to keep it under wraps. And of course I get the few or several hours of sleep I need as soon as possible. Sometimes it's just about trying to deal with the pressure as calmly as possible, and not getting pissed off when you're getting contradictory requests, or when people don't appreciate what you're doing and stuff. And since I'm shy, it helps, because I usually can't say things that are on my mind to people who aren't really close to me. Yet that doesn't change the fact that I don't like my job too much, and I might try looking for another soon. Yet, I'll try to stay with this job for as many months as I can, at the very least. And I have to go back to school soon as well.

    4. Can you tolerate people that implement nonsense rules so they can feel in control of their world?

    I'd say no (for the most part). I'm not a big fan of rules in general. Yet of course there are some rules that aren't bad (although they're not always followed), and a lot of the time reality and the world itself imposes its own rules which should be self-evident. Yet for the most part I don't like nonsense rules. And even if there was someone who wanted to (try to) 'impose' a 'nonsense' rule that I don't necessarily entirely disagree with, I still wouldn't like that person, because to me they represent a very rigid and dogmatic force; and for me that's an obstacle in the search for knowledge, free speech, and freedom (depending on what the nonsense rules are, I guess).
    I like to change my mind a lot. I want to update information; I seldom want something to be written in stone. I usually don't like it when something is decided once and for all. I want to continue things, ask new questions, ask different people, etc. I might not like it when knowledge is too stable, yet in my life, I can be afraid of change, unexpected changes and the like, and I can appreciate routine I guess. And even if it's something I don't entirely like, I try to hang on as much as possible, although in my mind I might fantasize about running away at times.
    Yet if there were nonsense rules at work or school or somewhere, it might be kind of hard to deal with, and I might not really tolerate it that much. Yet since I try to tolerate things and not complain (at least in the real world), I might not say anything if it doesn't really bother me that much. When someone asks me what I've been doing, or why I wasn't there or whatever, I'm honest and say, I did work on the cleaning, yet there were some interruptions due to a couple of people needing to use the washrooms, I needed to get a pen that worked, I had to go to the washrooms upstairs (myself), etc. I might not say everything, but I feel the need to explain (or justify) myself. Or in another example, I say the truth, that someone else asked me to return some perishable items, and of course I have to say that to the person who wants me up front instead. And then I help with some bagging up front, although I only have five minutes left in my shift, and someone else asks me to return some frozen products... So I'm finished my shift five minutes later, and I'm okay with that, and don't complain or anything... [There were times when I had to finish later than that, and of course I don't want to try to get paid extra when it wasn't really overtime, and I don't really consider myself a greedy person; there have been times in my life when I wasn't paid for hours and hours I worked, and my Mom had to push me to ask, and then when they still didn't pay me those hours after a month or so, she had to go there and ask on my behalf. That's how difficult it can be for me to fully stand up for my rights. In addition I try to do a fairly thorough job (at times), which interferes with speed, making me slower than other employees at certain tasks (because I don't sweep things under the rug, or like my Mom says that at work I should clean as if it were for the mother-in-law, since that's how other employees get the job done faster).]


    Here is an example of several times that I have changed my mind: Shirley Manson's type. At first, my ex-boyfriend V.I.'d her as an ISFj. Then I started to think she might be Beta (after him). Then, when I thought I was ESTp, I thought she might be ESTp. Then I had to start considering that she might be ENFj. Then quite some time later I thought that maybe she's Se-ISTj (C-LSI). And remember I thought she somewhat resembled my Aunt.
    Yet I sent my Aunt a description of the Thinking/logical type from Filatova's book and she didn't relate to it. This is what she said:
    "I don't know if I can relate to the suggested socionics type in your email, The Thinker.
    If this is what you asked. I am not very much of that. I am very intuitive and fluid and use theoretical knowledge integrated in an ever changing river of feelings and thoughts or waves of the imagination.
    My inner world is an ever shifting landscape where considerations about people and their interactions figure high. My own relations with other people are very important things, less than scientific, theoretical models."

    So as you can see, I've returned to the more likely possibility that my Aunt and Shirley Manson are both Feeling/ethical types, and very likely Intuitive. And possibly ENFj (making Galen and Ashton right). So while in the beginning, my ego might not have tolerated being wrong, or not getting credit; ultimately when I face reality, and realize that a fact is a fact, I'm okay with that. Who cares who takes the credit or who is right. I'm clearly not as smart as the majority of people here, and I'm not as experienced or knowledgeable in Socionics either.

    I also saw the Black Swan movie not too long ago. This is what my Aunt had to say:
    "I did not like the film The Black Swan, it had such a barren story, or maybe so naive and no strong characters, except for Nina, everybody else was serving to demonstrate the point (not very original) of the director.
    There are so few good films receiving awards nowadays, same with books."

    This is what I had originally written to her:
    "...I did see The Black Swan at the cinema a while ago. Although in some parts or ways it was kind of cliched or graphic I guess, in a lot of ways I found it quite meaningful. Sacrificing oneself for a performance or the creation of a work of art. Metamorphosing, letting go, becoming one with creation, or the performance, what you wish to express. Being it, instead of being detached from it. I found it quite interesting. I guess it's about 'freedom'. 'Hell is other people.'"

    [Objectively, though, the character seemed to be undergoing what some might consider a psychotic break(down).]

    In addition I could probably add, that the director Darren Aronofsky is typed as an Ni-INFp in Socionix, and him being an Introvert could explain why he focuses on the main character so much (at the expense of say Winona Ryder and the rest). Yet interestingly, he didn't write the screenplay (as far as I can tell from reading the info on wikipedia). The story was created by Andres Heinz. And aren't IEI's like Darren Aronofsky supposed to be "lazy." Yet he was involved in the writing of Requiem for a Dream, and that movie focuses on several characters quite thoroughly from what I remember. It's probably his best, and although Black Swan wasn't written by him, I'd say it's a close second, or just as good in a lot of ways. Yet I can't really make an accurate judgment, since I don't think I've seen all of his movies.

    Yet isn't IEI a dynamic type:
    http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.p...#Dynamic_types

    And don't "The stories of dynamics usually involve multiple main characters."? So that either means that one of the writers (Andres Heinz) himself, isn't an IEI nor a dynamic type; or that I'm misinterpreting the description(s) or taking it out of context.
    Last edited by HERO; 02-22-2011 at 08:38 AM.

  8. #8
    Hello...? somavision's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    London
    Posts
    1,474
    Mentioned
    8 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Bolt View Post
    ?? Could you enlighten an ignorant?
    Will you look in the mirror?
    IEE-Ne

  9. #9
    EffyCold The Ineffable's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Wallachia
    TIM
    ILE
    Posts
    2,195
    Mentioned
    13 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by somavision View Post
    Will you look in the mirror?
    I get it, it's a bluff.
    Shock intuition, diamond logic.
     

    The16types.info Scientific Model

  10. #10
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Here are some more songs:

    Db major (Virgo)



    G major (Gemini)



    Db major (Virgo)



    G major (Gemini)







    Anyway, there was a cashier where I worked who thought my name was Tyler, since there must have been someone else who worked there with that name (presumably in the past I guess). Yet although she called me that, I never actually corrected her, so she never really realized her mistake unless she asked me what my name is, or she found out when someone else called me. I wonder if that's type related (in my case). I think she might be an ESFj or something.

    And I know I probably shouldn't say this (or at least not now) yet why is it that I actually kind of like (not in a romantic sense) an ESTj at my work (she's the leader of the cashiers and whatnot, although I'm not a cashier of course), yet there's an ESTp there (or at least I'm assuming she's ESTp) who I can't stand, although I try my best. Yet her approach is kind of aggressive and mean, and although not explicitly rude or anything, definitely not nice or polite either. It's such a big difference from what most ESTj's are like from my experience. In a grocery store I was working in Victoria, I also had problems with an ESTp, and she was kind of in charge there a lot of the time. Maybe I'm wrong, and perhaps this is all subjective, yet I guess I can't help finding blocked with as being rather harsh, cold, mean, rigid, stressful/overwhelming, 'prejudiced', hurtful, etc. Of course not all Beta ST's are like that, yet perhaps I prefer the artistic types or musicians. Yet maybe some of the people who I like musically who I think are Beta, are not even Beta, and/or definitely not Beta ST.
    Last edited by HERO; 04-12-2011 at 10:02 PM.

  11. #11
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Here it is: I've finally succeeded in uploading it and possibly to my detriment, especially if it works. I'm not a good singer, and I'm probably butchering a great song. And I was nervous about recording it. And if it doesn't prove I'm Fe-INFp, I'm not sure what will.




    Here are some other songs (not vocal covers by me):

    F minor (Libra):



    F minor (Libra)



    Ab major (Libra)



    E major (Taurus)



    Ab major (Libra)




    Another thing that might be type-related -- my ex-boyfriend who might've been an INFp tried to give me advice at times when I felt stressed or overwhelmed with obsessive-compulsive issues and the like. There were times when he said I have to work on my expressiveness, or when I felt agitated or uptight, that I have to relax or let go. He told me to feel my hair growing, or count my breaths/breathing, stuff like that. To concentrate or pay attention to something else so that you are not overwhelmed by all your thoughts and whatnot, since that is something I have trouble with.

  12. #12
    Haikus
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    8,337
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Omg dude, you should try out for American Idol.

  13. #13
    EffyCold The Ineffable's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    Wallachia
    TIM
    ILE
    Posts
    2,195
    Mentioned
    13 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    lazybones: what about a video speaking, like telling things about you or something?
    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    Omg dude, you should try out for American Idol.
    I wonder who's the fish and who's the fisher here .
    Shock intuition, diamond logic.
     

    The16types.info Scientific Model

  14. #14
    Haikus
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    8,337
    Mentioned
    15 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Hah, I actually wanted to sound more enthusiastic, but I guess I failed (apparently.)

  15. #15
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    Omg dude, you should try out for American Idol.
    Thanks. Yet I'd most likely want to improve on my singing and/or take vocal lessons before I'd ever consider trying out in such a serious/national competition like American (or Canadian) Idol. And I also have to improve on my confidence, etc. Nevertheless, I don't think I ever will.

    I will probably make a video where I'm just talking (about myself) and stuff, yet I don't think it's something I've ever done, and it would probably be hard for me not to plan what I'm going to talk about in advance, and I'd probably be kind of nervous and awkward.

    I've also had some written summaries and reasons for considering or not considering myself a certain type, yet they're not finished. In addition I have a guitar, so I should probably try learning a song or two on it. And although I have an electric piano, and sometimes try to compose stuff on it or play something that I sang out of the blue, I'm not really that good of a piano player, since I'm mostly self-taught (and I'm not a natural talent or a virtuoso and I don't take much time to practice, although there were times when I used to practice more in the past), and I only ever went to some lessons for about a couple of months more or less (many years ago).

    Then there's karaoke which I've tried here and there. The funny thing with karaoke is that often the more I practice for a song, the worse the performance is. And there are times when I might have no problem singing in key (and the song is in my range) yet I'm not singing it loud enough, and there are times when the practice I've done just made things worse and I'm not able to sing it right. I suppose taking vocal lessons one day might help smooth/even out some of the rough edges, inconsistencies, and idiosyncracies.

    So an anecdote from the last time I was at karaoke -- I sang 4 AM by Our Lady Peace first, and it definitely didn't turn out the way I would've liked, especially for the first half. The first time I ever went to karaoke (in Edmonton) I sang that song, so this was the second time (I ever sang it). In Edmonton I sang it better. So apparently the practice I did (in advance) didn't improve my singing the second time around. Then after a lot of other people sang, I sang Down by the Water by PJ Harvey. And once again, failed miserably. I had practiced that one quite a bit, and it's a fairly simple melody. Yet I was probably quite nervous, and maybe I hadn't drank enough yet, and perhaps the background music somehow didn't help me. I don't know, but musically, that day I was completely off. I'd say I sang better in Victoria and Edmonton.
    So there was this woman there (in her 40s maybe?). And if at the time when I was there I hadn't been so nervous and uptight because I had to sing (and I was scared) I might have sat closer to the screen and payed attention to what songs she was singing. She was a very good singer, definitely much better than I am. She's probably a musician or maybe even a professional singer, just not famous (obviously) I'm assuming.
    Anyway, I remember after finishing Down by the Water I felt like a failure (which is how I usually feel if I either sense that I didn't sing it as well as I could have and/or some judges, since I did try out in Karaoke Idol once, were disappointed or thought it wasn't good enough). The thing is I still received a fair share of applause, yet I sat down feeling somewhat dejected and despondent. And this middle-aged woman (I didn't know her name), who's a much better singer than I am -- and I'm kind of regretting that I didn't really try to strike up a conversation with her to ask her for some advice and whatnot -- she actually complimented my singing, saying I did a good job or something. And I didn't know exactly what to say, and perhaps I said "thanks" since that's what I would usually say, yet I might not have. I definitely remember saying, "It wasn't that good." And she said something like that at least I was singing with the rhythm (or beat). That kind of just made me feel worse, since I knew she didn't actually think I did a good job; she was just saying that.
    So I had one last chance to try to prove myself, since it was getting quite late, and I knew out of all the songs I have ever sung at karaoke, there was only one that I seemed to enjoy singing most and didn't cause me much problem with melody or range or key or anything really. I had only sung it once in Victoria, so this would be the second time I ever sang it at karaoke. In Victoria, I sang it after the Karaoke Idol competition had just finished, yet a couple of the judges were still there, and they thought it was good, and I heard one of them saying that I should've gone with "the rock'n'roller" instead of singing Doll Parts, and that I had an "emotional voice". [Although with Doll Parts, a female judge said that she didn't feel that I loved the song from the way I was singing it, that it wasn't expressive enough.] The songs I had sung in the competition were Hands Down by Dashboard Confessional and Doll Parts by Hole. Other songs I had sung in karaoke (yet outside the competition and often with little or no practice) included 4 AM by Our Lady Peace, Don't Speak by No Doubt (I actually sang that song in Grade 5 at the talent show and probably sang it better than I did in karaoke), Heart of Gold by Neil Young, Malibu by Hole, Down By The Water by PJ Harvey . . . and I'm not sure what else I've ever sung at karaoke since I've never really gone that many times.
    I purposefully left out the so-called "rock'n'roller" -- the song that actually worked quite well for me with zero practice: Celebrity Skin. One of Hole's most famous songs (and co-written by Billy Corgan, as well as the band of course). And as cheesy as it might be, so far it's been the only song I could feel really confident singing (in karaoke), and perhaps it's a combination of the lyrics and music that suits me -- not that I like Celebrity Skin any more than any of their other songs and albums. So while I felt that I had vindicated/redeemed myself, and it might've helped that I had that second beer; I didn't mind that it seemed that that woman I had briefly spoken to seemed like she hadn't really payed attention (since she was helping a friend, talking to him, giving him advice, practically doing some physiotherapy for him for an injury he had or something related to his shoulder and/or work). That didn't really bother me since at least I proved to myself that I could sing at least one song relatively well and with more confidence (and élan). So I left (since it was quite late -- I had stayed there longer than I had planned to), and while I was leaving someone was singing "Lucky" by Britney Spears, and although I don't mind some of her songs (Toxic, Everytime, Piece of Me, Gimme More, Out from Under, Kill The Lights, etc.), singing a Britney Spears song is not really a priority for me. Yet I guess the fact that I've listened to so many of her songs is probably partially due to my ex-boyfriend's influence, since he really liked Britney Spears and Lady Gaga, as well as a lot of other music: Incubus, Korn, Robyn, Space Cowboy, Calvin Harris, E-40, Disturbed, 'dubstep', 30 Seconds to Mars, Papa Roach, Bubba Sparxxx, Justin Timberlake, Colby O'Donis, Lauryn Hill, etc. A lot of the music he liked was kind of new to me (even Lady Gaga at the time), except for Lauryn Hill (I owned one of her albums), etc. And I introduced him to music/singers like PJ Harvey (some of which he liked; he definitely liked PJ Harvey for the most part).


    Here are some more songs (I like):

    C minor (Capricorn) --




    B major (Capricorn) --

    Last edited by HERO; 03-06-2011 at 10:09 PM.

  16. #16
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    "Pride goes before a fall" [Pride Goeth Before The Fall]


    I actually love George W. Bush (George Walker Bush) [the son, and 43rd President of the United States]. And no offence to Barack Obama -- I think he's cool, yet kind of boring. (That's probably because he's my beneficiary: INTj. Since if I'm INFp then my beneficiary is INTj.)
    George W. Bush was a funny and interesting character. Maybe he wasn't a good president, yet I thought he was cool and sweet and cute and powerful. Maybe not as smart as Barack Obama, yet George W. was comical with the thin deceptive grey man lips/mouth, and the eyes... and I really related to the George W. Bush (Jr.) character in the movie W. And don't forget Condoleezza Rice: she was really hot and cool (in real life). Yes sir -- I might not have known what it was like to be them and have their pasts, but I feel you. I really do. I'm still feeling them even if I'm not Ophelia.

    But this song by PJ Harvey is not about that of course. It transcends countries and boundaries and politics and leaders just like so many of her other songs.


    E minor (Cancer) / D minor (Scorpio):



    "What if I take my problem to the United Nations?"

    They'll just say, "Suck it up and enjoy your type whatever that is, because you'll still be miserable and annoying no matter what." Begrudge it or embrace it.


    C# minor (Scorpio):




    A major (Aries):

    [for Gwyneth Paltrow (and CLove)]




    A major (Aries):




    C# minor (Scorpio)




    D minor (Scorpio)



    "When I was very young/Nothing really mattered to me/But making myself happy/I was the only one/Now that I am grown/Everything's changed/I'll never be the same..."

    "Nothing really matters/Love is all we need/Everything I give you/All comes back to me"

    "Looking at my life/It's very clear to me/I lived so selfishly/I was the only one/I realize/That nobody wins/Something is ending/And something begins..."

    "Nothing takes the past away/Like the future..."


    I was fired today, lol. So I was finishing up today, and it was already a couple of minutes after the end of my shift, and the woman who I considered ESTp (she may or may not be) was asking me where one of my co-workers was, and then told me she was taking over for me (and the 'carry-out') since my shift was over, and she told me to go to the manager's office when I go upstairs. She told me this a few moments or so before I asked her what I'd have to tell him or do or whatever, and she just said I have to see him.
    I went upstairs, and tried to remain as calm as possible although I was nervous. The door was open and I saw the manager and the (other) woman who I considered ESTj. They told me to sit down. Then he talked about how I didn't respond to his greeting this morning, when he said, "Good morning." That's not true: I said "hello" just about at the same time he said "Good morning," yet he must not have heard. Of course I didn't tell him that while he was talking to me. There were times in the past when I said "hello" to him yet he said nothing to me, so I'm assuming he never heard me. Of course I didn't tell him that (either).
    Meanwhile I tried to keep as expressionless and calm as possible, and I was secretly kind of happy, since I hated this job. (Bless You Taco Bell.) So he talked about how important being able to greet people and stuff is in the store, etc. and he asked me if I've been doing any of that, and I politely said, "No." I told him what he wanted to hear. In all fairness I usually didn't help with bagging (or 'wrapping') that much in the span of one day considering all the other tasks I had to do [bringing carts from outside, washroom checks, sweeps, bringing new 15L bottles of 'pure' water, mopping, taking care of spills, taking cardboard and garbage to the back, reshelving returns, replacing garbage bags, price checks, (calls for) carry out(s), etc.] Yet his problem I guess was with the quality of my (social) service, and I tried saying "hello" as much as I could, although I can imagine I was often quite quiet. And I said "have a good day" a lot. And I asked them if they need assistance carrying the groceries out (to the car) a lot.
    Well he was saying he doesn't know if the problem for me is that I'm too shy or what. He said he didn't have any problem talking to me now, since I talked a bit, calmly and politely. And that was it... (I want to go to the tiny fitness place in my building now because I feel fat.)
    Last edited by HERO; 03-09-2011 at 04:14 AM.

  17. #17
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    So perhaps, I have a punitive Super-Ego that might involve some Te, an impulsive Id that might involve some Se... The thing is when I’m in a very bad emotional state I can do (and have done) all kinds of crazy things: run away, break things, throw things, sing (in public, although singing in public or otherwise is not limited to negative emotional states for me), talking (and/or writing) about (inappropriate or offensive) stuff or stuff people don’t want to hear about, reading (out loud), being silent and/or depressed, sleeping, etc... Yet people have described me as ‘distant’, ‘clinical’, ‘odd’ (I was interested in astrology when I was younger), ‘bizarre’, ‘weird’, strange, self-absorbed, self-centred, ‘conservative’, humble, ‘pleasant’, ‘creative’, ‘understanding’, ‘passive(-aggressive)’, ‘antisocial’... And people have also told me that I need to let go, have fun, relax, and that I need to be more expressive/work on my expression... I don’t know if they could tell that I’m (socially) anxious, uncomfortable, uptight, neurotic, high-strung, self-isolating, etc.
    I remember there was this INFp girl I really liked or at least I thought she was INFp, and she thought I was weird and strange, and kind of looked down on me. And I guess even if we were the same basic personality type (that is IEI regardless of further subdivisions), sometimes there are factors that outweigh type in all kinds of friendships, relationships, etc. [For example using two and sixteen subtypes I might be an Fe-INFp (INFp-INFj), my Aunt might be an Se-ISTj (ISTj-ENTp) [or more likely an Ni-ENFj (ENFj-ESTp?)], my Mom might be an Fe-ENFj (ENFj-ISFj) [or simply ESI], my former stepdad might be an Ti-ESTp (ESTp-ISTj), my male cousin might be an Fe-ISFp (ISFp-ENFj), etc.]
    Well this is what happened before I met her. I had a infatuation/crush on a guy who I first met at an adolescent psychiatric rehab in 2004. He was a year older than me. The thing is when I was there he never really let on that he was gay or whatever, and often made fun of me for my perceived gayness which I was only gradually becoming aware of. At the same time, I was realizing, if only unconsciously and in hindsight, that I mainly felt pity and compassion for him. Anyway, he could be violent, and he punched and hit people including me. We shared a room at first. Nothing ever happened of course; it wasn’t that kind of place and I never had sex until 2009. We talked quite a bit, and although he could be a bit of a bully and bossy at times, he kind of got me out of my shell. The thing is, I was in there for selective mutism, social phoba/anxiety, etc. (I was on Celexa and Clomipramine at the time). So in the beginning I was barely talking to anyone except my Mom. She visited sometimes and stuff and I got to go home on weekends.
    One day a new girl arrived with orange hair. At first she seemed somewhat wary of the place, and a guy there described her as ‘scary’ and ‘Goth’, and the guy I liked was talking to him. Let’s call the guy I liked ‘Myron’. ‘Myron’ said, “Be afraid!” to the girl in a somewhat humorous manner. The girl responded, I will!” I remember that she somehow scratched his arm that night.
    As things progressed and tensions grew, the girl obviously wasn’t very happy there, yet I liked her and befriended her I guess. I remember, I think I started this game where we’d try to say words, names, and phrases backwards. Like Jesus, would become Susej! I remember the pronunciation was something like Suhseej or something. Myron was shouting/screaming it, and said that we’re so disabled. There was a staff there that they thought looked like Jesus.
    I think I’ve already recounted a considerable amount of this story. I ran away. End of story. Right? I met him again years later. And again. And I let him and his fiance to visit the place I was staying with my stepdad when my stepdad was not there during the day. The first morning they didn’t stay inside too much; they just rested and we talked a bit. His fiance, I’ll call him Antaeus had glasses and seemed fairly intelligent. There was a card I had written before for Myron. I don’t know if I ever gave it to him. Yet I showed it, and it included a quotation I paraphrased from my Aunt incompletely. Something like, “Pain is part of who and what we are when our world and the principle of life collide.” I’m not sure if that’s exactly how it was phrased, yet it’s how I remember it. Antaeus thought I was smart. Myron and Antaeus discussed my vocabulary and intelligence.
    I think I remember telling Antaeus some stuff about my family and biological father, and he said, “Do you know the expression, ‘It takes two to tango?’” I also remember him saying how people get their prejudices, pettiness, rigid ideas/conceptions, etc. from their early conditioning in childhood in relation to their parents/caregivers. Of course the more one learns from one’s encounters with the world and oneself, the more one is able to truly heal and accept that there were certain injuries that may have predisposed one to a certain mindset, a certain way of viewing others, etc. and that if there are flaws, they can be changed for the better. It’s good to have hope, despite all the pain.
    I don’t recall why, but he also said, “Bad things happen to bad people.” I disagreed. Bad things don’t always happen to bad people. Most people are not 100% bad, or 100% good. More than a year later when my cousin was raped and thrown from a balcony/window and almost died, I didn’t think that she deserved it or that it was a case of “dark karma.”
    I think that was the day they went out so that Antaeus could get his high school records because he wanted to join the military. I remember at a certain point how they sort of started play fighting a lot of the time. I remember that we took the LRT to downtown. There were times when they were even fighting when we were waiting for a train, and there were these strange inspectors standing there doing nothing, just writing things down. It was surreal.
    I remember giving Antaeus the money for him to get his high school records. There was a point where we were at Canada Place or somewhere. I remember that there was a moment during their (play) fighting or whatever, that Myron was somewhat injured. Let me say that I’ve never really been the kind of guy to take part in play fighting and wrestling and whatnot. I don’t know if that’s good, bad, or neither. I suppose there’s probably a difference, obviously, between, say martial arts or wrestling and attacking someone or physically intimidating them in a potentially violent manner. Nevertheless, I never really cultivated much aggression (or masculinity) I guess, yet I did have problems with anger and rage in the past. Yet for the most part I’ve been over-controlled, unable to voice my true feelings, and by bottling up emotions like anger, I sometimes exploded. Yet in public it was very rare for me to express myself.
    I remember, before we went out, I think Antaeus wrote something on a piece of paper to Myron. Yet Myron didn’t really understand it, and I heard Antaeus say (or read what he wrote). I think it was something like that I just need to find the courage to say what I really want to say or what I really think, and not be so afraid of what other people might say or how they would react. That I need to be more natural and confident and brave. I guess that way I might be more balanced and have more friends. Now I remember; I think it was, “He just needs to find the courage to speak his mind and he’ll be fine.” Maybe not. I don’t remember for sure.
    My Mother went through about twelve hours of excruciating labour in order to give birth to me. I think I was born sort of cyanotic. At birth I was separated from my Mother for about a day or more. I think it was because they said my Mother didn’t have any milk. There is no milk. About seven months after my birth my Mother left with me to Canada.
    My Mother doesn’t understand why I act out when she is fighting for her rights. I get upset when she has problems crossing with cars, or people in general (I’ve given cars/people/vehicles the finger [or two], shouted, read out loud, etc.). My Mom said I was always against her (with the lawyer, with the psychologist, etc.). My Mom says she’d rather die than be with me. She says that when she’s old she’ll really hate me and won’t want to see me. She says that any words she says, I fuck up; and that I’m such a jerk. My Mom hardly tolerates me. Sometimes she says that she wishes she could be dead (at this moment).
    My Mom hates people who lie to sell their products. If she’s seen something advertised as being on sale, and then finds out that somehow the advertising was deceptive, then she won’t buy that product out of principle. My Mom says I never loved her; that I just mocked her and was against her. And she doesn’t care. She’s saying that I’m writing everything she says like she’s a philosopher or something. She says I’m kind of crazy. My Mom says she cannot tolerate me anymore. She feels like she’s in hell.
    My Mom: “You are talking in lyrics. You are kind of crazy... Even you are citing me. You are writing down everything I say. It’s kind of crazy... I don’t understand why that piano has to be open all the time.”
    Mom: “I should’ve killed you in my womb. Put some quinine.”

    Anyway, back to the story with Myron and Antaeus. I thought they could be like my friends or something. I don’t remember whether or not we went to a movie that first day or not, yet I remember the episode. We went to the mall, and we were walking towards the cinema. Myron and Antaeus were closer together, and I was at a slight distance away from them. While I was walking I saw Bill Smith (the former mayor). And I thought it was kind of cool, so I wanted to tell Myron and Antaeus, yet they weren’t really listening.
    Then we went to see the Rambo movie at the time. It was February, 2008. There were three of us, and I think I only had enough money for two of us. So I payed for Antaeus and myself, and since Myron was the best at slyness, he snuck in.
    Interruption: My Mom says to ‘clean for the eyes of the mother-in-law. Like sweeping the dirt under the carpet, under the furniture.’ That’s her advice for cleaning at work, so I don’t take so long ...say with washroom checks. Who knows what’s under the toilet seat, right? Yet I like to be thorough. Although they pay me $10 an hour. That’s why I need to get an education.

    Anyway, I don’t remember exactly which Rambo movie it was, yet Julie Benz was in it, and it was okay. I also liked her portrayal of Darla in the TV series Angel. After the movie, both Myron and Antaeus talked about war and how they would want to defend their country. Myron conjectured regarding what if there were people of different nationalities (etc.) fighting in the city... I think stuff like that. Antaeus maintained he would fight to defend his country...
    Well I guess that was it for that day, as far as I can remember. Yet before I fast-forward, I remember the hoodie and/or sweater Myron had. I think he washed some of his clothes in the washing machine in our building or something and maybe left it by accident or something. I’m not sure. Yet I remember smelling it and hugging it, taking comfort in it. Nothing erotic though; in some ways it was more platonic. My Aunt once said that Myron and I may have been kindred spirits – agape.
    Then next morning or the morning after, I was excited about going to the library, since I knew that Myron would be there. I remember that before that I had been repeatedly listening to Ben Fold Five’s song “Kate”, and rocking (swaying side to side/sideways to music). So this would be a finale of sorts I guess. I took the LRT (train) and I had my discman with me I think, probably still listening to "Kate"...

  18. #18
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default



    C major (Virgo)



    Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
    Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
    Where there is injury, pardon.
    Where there is doubt, faith.
    Where there is despair, hope.
    Where there is darkness, light.
    Where there is sadness, joy.
    O Divine Master,
    grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;
    to be understood, as to understand;
    to be loved, as to love.
    For it is in giving that we receive.
    It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
    and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
    Amen.

  19. #19
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    y
    Last edited by HERO; 02-11-2012 at 01:34 PM.

  20. #20
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    F minor (Libra)


  21. #21
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    F# minor (Aries)



    'Myron' (to psychiatry): Father, Do I have to drink these drugs?
    Father, Will they get me [your] love?
    Father, Should I lose some weight?
    Father, Am I gonna be a thug?

    I tried to be a boy
    I tried to be a girl
    I tried to be a mess
    I tried to be the best
    I guess I did it wrong
    That's why I ["Myron"] use this song
    http://www.facebook.com/search.php?q...id=87829729504
    This type of modern life -- is it for me?
    This type of modern life -- is it for free?


    lazybones: So I ran off to the streets
    Looking for sympathy
    A little company
    I tried to find a friend
    It's more easily said
    It's always been the same
    This type of modern life -- is it for me?
    This type of modern life -- is it for free?


    "Myron": Ah, Canadian Life (Promethean Life)
    I live the Canadian Dream (North American Dream)
    Myron (to Antaeus): You are the best thing I've seen
    You are not just a dream

    (Canadian Life)
    (Canadian Dream)

    [I tried to stay ahead, I tried to stay on top
    I tried to play the part, but somehow I forgot
    Just what I did it for and why I wanted more
    This type of modern life - Is it for me?
    This type of modern life - Is it for free?]

    (Promethean Life)
    (Promethean Dream)

    Do I have to change my name?
    Am I gonna be a star?
    Do I have to change my sex?
    Am I gonna leave a scar?

    I'm drinking alcohol, and there are various drugs
    I feel the poisons go through my body
    And you know I'm satisfied
    I've used "sex" as an escape and a tool to be used
    My boyfriend's helped me steal "objects" from some suckers and losers
    And you know I'm satisfied
    I do homeless and criminals, and the retards and simpletons are just so much collateral damage
    So I'm checking out guys at the mall and you know I'm satisfied
    I'm digging on my psychic powers
    I think I'm worse than Hitler
    And if the Antichrist can give me hope
    Then you know I'm satisfied
    I have TV, Radio, CD's, cellphones, and computers
    Many churches, therapists, pills, social services, and a lot of alcohol/liquor/porn
    A website, a facebook, dozens of friends, and a group
    Casinos, hypocrisy, self-righteousness, and lies
    Do you think I'm satisfied?

    lazybones: I'd like to express my extreme point of view
    I'm not a Christian and I'm not a Jew
    I'm just living out the Canadian Dream
    And I just realized that nothing is what it seems...

    Do I have to change my name?
    Am I gonna be a star [thug]?
    Do I have to change my d**k?
    Am I gonna leave a Mark?
    (Promethean Life)
    Do I have to?!
    (North American Dream)
    (Canadian Life)
    Do I have to?!
    (Promethean Dream)
    Do I have to
    CHANGE!?!
    Last edited by HERO; 03-31-2011 at 09:42 AM.

  22. #22
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    C minor (Capricorn)



    The Glorious Land by PJ Harvey

    "How is our glorious country sown?/Not with wheat and corn./How is our glorious land bestowed?//And what is the glorious fruit of our land?/Its fruit is deformed children."


    It's funny, because when I went to Starbucks with that annoying Se-ESTp guy, I actually had a soy latte or whatever, yet it was chai, and I didn't want any dairy or whipping of course. I already took Lactaid for the pizza before; I didn't need any more dairy. I usually don't have coffee or lattes or drinks like that and I never go to Starbucks. It was an exception because I was with him.
    I paid for all the food at Boston Pizza. I paid for the lattes or whatever they are. And two days ago (on Thursday) I paid for the subway sandwiches, and the Strawberry Cheesequake or whatever the heck it is (from Dairy Queen) [that he had]. I didn't tell him I lost my job (of course). [He said he's living on tips until he gets his next pay cheque.]
    I have a tendency to lie I guess (yet it's usually in real life and about something I'd feel bad being honest about). "Oh, I lost my job." or "Oh, I didn't (even) finish high school." These things are not always easy for me to tell someone in real life, especially if I'm not very close to them. Of course for work, I was honest about that from the start. And people probably look down on me. I guess it's because I'm a lazy piece of shit, and Ashton and Absurd and everyone hates me. I want to die, lol. Because they don't like me, I should kill myself like that Ammonius Hermiae.
    How about, if you don't like me just frak off. It's not like Ashton looks at my blog anymore. So if you don't like me don't even look at my blog. Don't look at my profile. Ignore me like almost everyone does (except for the rednecks). They really piss me off. The point is I hit back when hit and attack when attacked. No, I'm just violent. Why doesn't everyone just kill me. I can't seem to disengage from this bad mood for some reason. I must be stopped. By the Alpha NT's, right? All these annoying elitists, lol.



    "Girl germs eat your little virus/Revolution come and die/ELITISTS who eat the virus . . . You can try to suck me dry but there's nothing left to suck/Just you try to hold me down/Come on try to shut me up . . . I don't really miss Santa Claus but I sure miss Jehovah God"




  23. #23

    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Belgium
    TIM
    9w1
    Posts
    2,775
    Mentioned
    153 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    what is the purpose of the signs ?
    unholy water sanguine addiction

  24. #24
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by timewaster View Post
    what is the purpose of the signs ?
    If you're talking about the zodiac signs, it's from an astrology book I have on birthdays, and in the beginning it connects different things like colors, keys, etc. to each of the twelve zodiac signs. If I remember correctly it goes like this:

    Aries: F# minor and A major

    Taurus: F major and E major

    Gemini: G major and G minor

    Cancer: E minor and Eb minor

    Leo: Eb major and G# minor

    Virgo: C major and Db major

    Libra: F minor and Ab major

    Scorpio: D minor and C# minor

    Sagittarius: A minor and Bb major

    Capricorn: C minor and B major

    Aquarius: D major and F# major

    Pisces: B minor and Bb minor


    Anyway, here's the lazybones quote of the day: "My [former] stepdad did to the Jehovah's Witness belief system what Bolt did to Socionics . . . Let's face it -- without inventiveness and creativity, things would be too secure and comfortable. They would stagnate and we would feel (even) more stifled than is necessary. Revolutions and rebellions can sometimes be good things."


    Here are the songs:





    C# minor (Scorpio):


  25. #25
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Favorite female characters from the 'V' TV Show: Lisa, Erica Evans

    Favorite male characters fromm the 'V' TV Show: Ryan Nichols, Tyler Evans

    Favorite port wine: Madeira

  26. #26
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Some songs. Please Love me. Please forgive me.:

    C major (Virgo):



    C major (Virgo):



    C major (Virgo):



    Db major (Virgo):



    C major/Db major (Virgo) ['in between the cracks']"




    I'm drunk and feeling the love. Please, please forgive me... If it still exists.

  27. #27
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    A minor (Sagittarius)


  28. #28
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Songs about my cliched, mediocre, and demonized self:





    Last edited by HERO; 02-11-2012 at 01:38 PM.

  29. #29
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Nobody likes me.






    F major (Taurus)



    F minor (Libra):



    Ab major (Libra):




    I remember when I was young (say about 11...), and I'd say, sometimes 'half-seriously', that nobody likes me. And my 'stepdad' would say something like, 'Why should they like you? Do you like anyone?' or something like that.

    Yet about nine years later, the ex was the kind of guy that would say that if I don't visit him he'd kill himself. Or that if I don't visit him I'll lose the love of my life. And sometimes he talked about how if he had a lot of money he'd use some of it to buy cocaine, since he considered himself still 'addicted' although he had stopped.

    In the past, 2006 for example, and before, sometimes I'd run away from home (usually in the night), and I'd just walk in the night. Sometimes I'd even go barefoot, and there were a couple of times when the police would take me (back home) [in handcuffs]. Yet most of the times there was no police, and I'd just walk until morning and go back home. There was this one time (I don't think I was barefoot that time). It wasn't too long after I had found out about my biological father -- maybe just a couple of weeks more or less. And I guess I had probably walked through downtown (downtown in Edmonton is smaller than Calgary, although I'd say I prefer Edmonton in a lot of ways)... and I was walking in an area near the hospital. And I remember there was this strange guy and a woman (and who knows who's walking out so late at night). He seemed kind of pissed off that I was close by, and he kind of told me to get away from him or whatever. Yet I must have been in some sort of 'hypomanic' mood (for lack of a better word) or whatever at that time, and I remember saying, "I can run." And then there was this exhilirating feeling that I was running as fast as I had ever run, and not because I was scared, but just because, and it kind of felt good I guess. Yet a couple of weeks, more or less, would come the third hospitilization in three years, (a lot) more Zyprexa, and a new condition no one can figure out -- 'chronic pelvic pain syndrome'. Oh well. Who cares.

    I remember once in those times when I was walking in the city late at night, and I was somewhere (I don't remember exactly), and I think there was this prostitute who said, "Hey Larry!". She probably thought I was a drug dealer or something. Anyway, enough anecdotes for one night/day. I'm evil and self-absorbed and don't want to be INFp . . . For the love of God, why? I guess I'm doomed. Doomed to miss someone who will never love me. Doomed to be scared and pissed off all the time.

  30. #30
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default


  31. #31
    Sir Knight's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    523
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    It's fun to think about what would happen if civilization as we know ended tomorrow. While everyone else would be freaking the fuck out, it'd just be another day in the life for you. Your feet would already be calloused enough for walking in an age where factories no longer churn out shoes.

    Of course, you may just end up being one of the (un)lucky few to experience the unique sensation of your skin hitting its boiling point and sloughing right of your bones when the nukes hit or whatever, but, whatever, it's an escapist fantasy, we can rewrite probability for the sake of feeling better.

    I relate to a lot of what you write here. My life seems by far cushier in comparison to yours, and in a perverse kind of way that makes me feel like your inferior. Whatever the case, I'd say you can definitely be INFp. Of course, only if you want to be.
    4w5 sp/sx

    Please, direct all questioning of my self-typing to this thread. Thank you.

  32. #32

  33. #33
    crazedrat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    moon
    Posts
    4,885
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    INFp or ENFp. ENFp because you have their bipolar emotional reactivity. I'd say INFp otherwise. Not really sure.
    INTp

  34. #34
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Pretty on the Inside (I Was Joking)

    C'mon people I'm not IEI. I don't even look like one. People are just voting IEI to spite me . . .



    - favorite character from the Good Wife: Kalinda (ISTj -- what else could she be?)
    Last edited by HERO; 02-11-2012 at 01:40 PM.

  35. #35
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default I'm still relevant??!!!!???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I'm here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    G major (Gemini)





    Db major (Virgo)








    [my really really bad singing on this one]





    E major (Taurus):



    Eb major (Leo)

    Last edited by HERO; 03-26-2011 at 02:33 AM.

  36. #36
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Sir Knight View Post
    It's fun to think about what would happen if civilization as we know ended tomorrow. While everyone else would be freaking the fuck out, it'd just be another day in the life for you. Your feet would already be calloused enough for walking in an age where factories no longer churn out shoes.

    Of course, you may just end up being one of the (un)lucky few to experience the unique sensation of your skin hitting its boiling point and sloughing right of your bones when the nukes hit or whatever, but, whatever, it's an escapist fantasy, we can rewrite probability for the sake of feeling better.

    I relate to a lot of what you write here. My life seems by far cushier in comparison to yours, and in a perverse kind of way that makes me feel like your inferior. Whatever the case, I'd say you can definitely be INFp. Of course, only if you want to be.
    Yes I used to walk outside in the night (and sometimes barefoot), yet that was the past. Currently the only major problem I have to deal with is chronic pain, and beyond that I'd say I'm relatively comfy for the most part, and I hardly ever go outside, especially not at night.

  37. #37
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedratsghost View Post
    INFp or ENFp. ENFp because you have their bipolar emotional reactivity. I'd say INFp otherwise. Not really sure.
    Cool, you'd actually consider ENFp (an Ne-leading type) for me. You're probably one of few. Yet I'll take that as a compliment.

  38. #38
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I should probably start writing down my dreams more, although that would require overcoming a lot of my laziness and (unconscious) resistance, fears, discomfort, etc.

    I realize that out of all my dreams, dreams of 'the ex' are extremely rare. And not just that -- in most of those dreams I never actually see him, or he's represented by someone that doesn't even (really) look like him, or his face is very distorted. That was the case even when we were 'together'. Either I couldn't reach him or find him or whatever. In the most recent dream I'm supposed to meet him for coffee yet I never get to. In my notebook I wrote -- "I have to leave at 5?"


    Bb minor (Pisces)



    A minor (Sagittarius)



    B minor (Pisces)

    Last edited by HERO; 03-26-2011 at 01:30 AM.

  39. #39
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    F minor

    One of my favorite Avril Lavigne songs. I often relate to it.



    E minor




    I remember that in the beginning of our 'relationship', months before I visited him, 'the ex' once asked me to write an essay he needed to complete for one of his college courses. It's possible that I actually volunteered (to do it), when I heard about it (and how he was struggling or dreading it). I think the essay was on a subject related to the history of education in the United States, its current state, pros and cons, etc. So I started doing some research, even found some stuff by Ivan Illich that really interested me. And also some historical stuff from other sources, so I was able to begin the essay and get some sources, yet I felt very overwhelmed. Yet I didn't tell him that. In the end it turned out that it wasn't due as soon as he had thought, yet I gave up anyway, because well I haven't even finished high school, and school wasn't exactly my forte. [My Mother had to write on my behalf to say I couldn't do it.] Yet what I began was pretty good, and to be honest, if I had finished it myself, he would've probably have gotten a better mark. Yet it's annoying to feel 'used' by someone who doesn't even truly appreciate or understand you, and that's how I've almost always felt in my dealings with Beta Irrationals (in real life). Even if I'm IEI . . . what of it?

  40. #40
    WE'RE ALL GOING HOME HERO's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    1,001
    Mentioned
    25 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Ekaterina Filatova, Understanding The People Around You: An Introduction To Socionics (Hollister: MSI Press, 2006), 124-125:

    - pp. 124-125 [PART III: Intertype Relations (7, 8. RELATIONSHIP OF SUPERVISION)]: " . . . Compared to the conflictive relationship, it is asymmetrical, which makes it even more painful. The partner who feels pressure in his weak Channel III is more vulnerable . . . It is important to emphasize the asymmetry of this relationship: the Supervisor, feeling no psychological pressure from a Supervisee, can approach her up to a dangerously close distance. Partners in the conflictive relationship are more careful about <hurting> each other, because psychological pressure is reciprocal."


    My Supervisor is the LIE.


    Here are some songs:

    G major (Gemini)





    G minor (Gemini):





    F minor (Libra):



    G minor (Gemini):






    Db major (Virgo):


Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •