Hello everybody, this is probably just another boring “what am I? Me me me!” post, and I’m sorry for that! But, after a few days of lurking through all of the different Socionics(and some Myers-Briggs, but they all seem very…basic) forums, you lot are my favorites, so please keep that in mind and bear with me.
When I first completed the MBTI in high school, my result was ENTP. Since then though, I’ve become more--in touch?--with my feelings, you could say. For the longest time after that, I had considered myself an ENFP, but I disagree with that typing these days. There’s a certain “edge” or “bite” to me, that I don’t think many ENFps have.
I’m just getting acquainted with the different quadras, but the more I read about Delta, the more I’m reminded of a particular group of friends I would hang around years ago. They all loved me at first, and we shared some common interests(art, music, pretentious independent films), but after a while, I think I was too much for them, which is strange, because no other group of people have ever made me feel that way before! They purposely made me the center of attention all of the time(which, I‘m not used to being), and would keep me around for laughs and a merry old time, but then they’d get really weird. They’d just get this look in their eyes, like I had always crossed some imaginary line of good vs. evil. One of them was an INFj and one was an ISFj, and for a long time they were my two best friends. They just were always so sensitive about everything! They’d always guilt me for the little mistakes that I naturally couldn’t help but make, like, forgetting to come to their show, or not hanging out with them because I was lazy. One time I didn’t hang out with the ISFj on her birthday because I reeeeaallly hadn’t been feeling well and I thought she’d never talk to me again. I quit hanging out with her altogether because her emotional neediness sucked the life out of me. I can’t tolerate needy friends. I still talk to the INFj, but I secretly-think he secretly-thinks I’m “evil” with a touch of good in me. Hahaha. Deltas are so "soft" and silly. I think I'm a little "hard"er and silly.
Right now, my current “best friend” is an INFp, he’s amaaaazing. He’s quirky, accepting, has good taste, and the conversation NEVER goes stale. And he has never guilted me about anything, ever, which makes me want to treat him like a better friend. I’m also good friends with an ENFp right now, and we can have the best deep conversations(with lots of huge, strange, metaphors), that is, when she’s not talking about the boring real world details of her life, like her job. She’s also prone to like inspirational quotes, that make me cringe, and compare her “feelings” with romantic comedies, which also makes me cringe. I just can’t figure out if I hate it because it’s overly sentimental, or because it’s just bad taste? Hmmm.
Sometimes I think I could be ENFj, because they are a little bit "harder" and because I do have a romantic streak in me, it’s just got to be a VERY weird romance or person to spark my interests. Once they’ve sparked it though, I am prone to pine and daydream about them alllll of the time. I’m very playful with the object of my affections, and for as weird or quirky as I am normally, I’m it times ten when I’m around the person. I want love(and I want everything else in life) that transcends this boring world(what a boring physical plane of existence), and makes me feel like a magical world really exists. If a person doesn’t make me feel that way, I have very little romantic interest in them. Unless they’re really hott.
I've also been looking into ENTp again, I just don't know if I like magical things too much to be an NT? All of the Ne/Ti people I've known, are obsessed with robots and aliens. I like aliens, but sometimes all of the Science part of Science Fiction can bore me. I do, however, find quantum physics and metaphysics fascinating and looove theories of alternate realities, time travel, etc. But I also know a lot of NFs that feel that way.
Things I like: Fantasy books/television/films, sexy wizards, historical fiction, neurotic types, laughing, writing, making music, teasing, lighthearted fun, an exciting/adventurous love, accepting the world in shades of grey, stretching the truth, studying philosophy and the humanities
Things I dislike: Overly sentimental people, inspirational quotes, robots, people telling me about their crushes on me, people cornering me in a conversation, loyalty for the sake of it, patriotism just for the sake of it, seriousness, situations where laughing is unacceptable (speech classes, funerals)
Right now, I think I belong in Alpha or Beta. Alpha seems fun and ridiculous and like nobody real gives a fuck. I love my real life Alpha friends. Beta, seems cool, because I keep reading things about chivalry and the epicness to Beta, which I’m down with(Medieval times, FTW!)
I just don’t want to be a Delta, no offense! They don’t want me either, wah!
can anybody help enlighten me?