How to dump Delta women

[Expat]

ENFp:

To part with the ENFp woman is complex, since on no account will she accept the fact that someone is tired of her. All her irresistable charm will be activated in order to bring to order the straying worshipper. So, what to do? We can advise only one thing: show her, that you use her, not she you. This she will not accept, and you, most likely, will attain the desired effect. But do not count on complete and final oblivion. With the random encounter your former friend will rush to your neck with a contented scream, to the big surprise of her new satellite.

ISTp:

The ISTp woman, being guided by her incomprehensible drives, can cease to show up to see you of her own accord - even before you see that you are not made for each other. But if your decision is already reached, and she is still there, act decisively. You will give her a list of your requirements - it does not matter what, provided that they began with the words: "you are obliged...", "you must...", and that they conclude with: "... you must do it more quickly!" Add flavor to this with stormy emotions. After this, you won't see the ISTp woman for a long time... as long as she, following her own impulses, does not show up at your door of her own accord.

ESTj:

In order to preserve her own image, the ESTj woman is capable of spending a long time preserving the image of stable relationships. Very often her men, not wanting to keep the rhytm of a slave field, attempt to leave, but this is not simple. The ESTh will again become tender and tempting, until her partner thinks it over, and here she will hope that he changes his mind. The natural way of break up does not work with the ESTj: the complete absence of enthusiasm from your side; she will simply take over herself your responsibilities. Common cheating leads to the best result - the ESTj will be deeply hurst, but this way is unsafe, since she is capable of taking revenge (moreover by means of someone else). Therefore we recommend this method : the meticulous criticism of her entire actions with a detailed analysis of errors.

INFj:

No special measures are necessary to carry out the break up. If you decide to leave - you leave; neither reproaches nor scandals nor revenge will threaten you. Even if the INFj is slightly upset, she will try by all means not demonstrate this, and quietly she will disappear from your life.

[Joy]

*pats Expat*

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[FDG]

uh... should I acknowledge how accurate this is??? Your insight is scary sometimes expat.

except the only "slightly upset" part about INFjs. It might not be shown outwardly -- but the very observant may notice that they have failed to eat or sleep for some time, and other little clues. Nobody is allowed to see how much they hurt, so to all outward appearances they'll look just fine.

Unfortunately for him, he didn't manage to get engaged with all types of both Gamma and Delta quadra - those are taken from socionics.org

[anndelise]

ENFp:
To part with the ENFp woman is complex, since on no account will she accept the fact that someone is tired of her. All her irresistable charm will be activated in order to bring to order the straying worshipper. So, what to do? We can advise only one thing: show her, that you use her, not she you. This she will not accept, and you, most likely, will attain the desired effect. But do not count on complete and final oblivion. With the random encounter your former friend will rush to your neck with a contented scream, to the big surprise of her new satellite.

I am sitting here, wondering in all my previous relationships if I've ever acted quite as you suggest here. I sure as hell hope not!


The best way to end a relationship with an ENFp is to be blunt, straight forward, no pussyfooting around. Don't dangle her emotions, don't drop hints, don't gradually disengage yourself, just do it. Give her very clear cut reasons as to why you are ending it. Otherwise, the ENFp's mind will create all sorts of reasons why you are acting the way you are...and wonder which, if any, of these scenarious are correct, gradually driving herself crazy and finally, wondering if it ended because she began acting weird towards the end. What a horrible thing to do to her!!

Whereas bluntness has always been treasured. Mind, it doesn't mean that we don't get hurt, but more that the wound is a clean slice and can thus be mended more quickly and more cleanly than a jagged gradual rip.


Admittedly, yes, "do not count on complete oblivion". Mainly because of generalness to not maintain grudges rather than desire to resume the relationship. The cleaner the break, the less likely a grudge is held.

In an ENFp's mind, a friend is still a friend, even if something more intense/intimate didn't work out. However, you still have the ability granted any individual to state what your boundaries are. "Do not contact me", "Do not contact my family, and "Do not acknowledge my existence if we pass on the streets" are pretty straightforward statements. It might be difficult on the ENFp to hear those wishes as she would still consider you a friend and would still hope that things are well with you, if not improved, however, most ENFps will abide by those wishes. After all, it's what our friend desires. Heartbreaking, but abidable.


I am sitting here, trying to think of someone who has broken up with me. In situations where a guy has "broken up" with me, it was merely dating, and thus a gradual lessening of contact from them was no big deal. In most cases, it has been I who have had to set and enforce clear boundaries. Except for one case, and it was someone who kept doing a back and forth thing, unwittingly playing with my emotions as if a yo-yo. (ESFj) I finally had to give him the break he needed and so I started a very physical fight so that we would both have a clear cut ending to the relationship and thus we could both move on. Unfortunately, 3 hours afterwards, as I was packing up my belongings preparing to move out, he called up asking for forgiveness for being an ass. Even though I still moved out, and agreed to a friendship with him, he still kept pushing for a relationship.....The relationship was hell...the breaking up was hell...attempting to maintain a friendship with him was hell....because of 1) the fact that there was no clear cut decision on his part as to what he wanted, and 2) the instinct of the ENFp to avoid hurting others.


Expat, I acknowledge that it is none of my business, but I am very curious as to what type of situation/actions you were imaging/recalling when you wrote your thread. What you suggested regarding the ENFp, sounds like a very unstable ENFp.

[anndelise]

Expat, I just noticed that there is a similar Gamma thread and that the main post of this thread is from a translation. I apologize for any rudeness that you may have felt was directed towards you. Rudeness was not intended. And the last paragraph apparently doesn't apply. :wink:

After reading the other parts of the Delta and Gama posts, they each reak of someone who refuses or doesn't know how to be straightforward about breaking up with women and chooses, instead, to play games to end things. In every description there is a hint of a man who never really cared about the woman, during nor after the relationship. This speaks much of the original spokesman.

[Fermi]

beta and alpha also wants this, expat!

[jessica129]

mmkay, is it just me or do the majority of these descriptions never really fully make much sense? Broken english..my mind hurts after reading some. I guess i'm the only one that feels this way seeing as how the majority of you can understand.

But yeah, people don't break up with me. I have to be the one to break it off. If they do break up, i entice them back then I do it to them.

[Joy]

Alpha doesn't want this.

[Joy]

No.

[Expat]

But yeah, people don't break up with me. I have to be the one to break it off. If they do break up, i entice them back then I do it to them.

Sounds like a huge waste of time and effort. To which purpose?

Besides, your sentence above was contradictory.

[Expat]

Expat, I just noticed that there is a similar Gamma thread and that the main post of this thread is from a translation. I apologize for any rudeness that you may have felt was directed towards you. Rudeness was not intended. And the last paragraph apparently doesn't apply. :wink:

No problem!

After reading the other parts of the Delta and Gama posts, they each reak of someone who refuses or doesn't know how to be straightforward about breaking up with women and chooses, instead, to play games to end things. In every description there is a hint of a man who never really cared about the woman, during nor after the relationship. This speaks much of the original spokesman.

I think they vary in quality. Some of them seem to have been written partially for fun, and they do provide an amusing insight into the type, such as the INTp, ENTj and ISTp ones, while others seemed more serious like INFj and ISFj.

I agree with what you just said and I think it applies to both men and women. I hate games too.

[FDG]

But yeah, people don't break up with me. I have to be the one to break it off. If they do break up, i entice them back then I do it to them.

Not if the guy doesn't want to come back, duh

[schrödinger's cat]

After reading the other parts of the Delta and Gama posts, they each reak of someone who refuses or doesn't know how to be straightforward about breaking up with women and chooses, instead, to play games to end things. In every description there is a hint of a man who never really cared about the woman, during nor after the relationship. This speaks much of the original spokesman.

Agree. The words "manipulative" and "whimp" spring to mind. The ENFP doesn't sound too mature and stable either, though, so... fair enough. EDITED TO ADD: Wait, I've read the Gamma thread. It's all just a joke, right?

[Expat]

Wait, I've read the Gamma thread. It's all just a joke, right?

At least to a large extent.

[Slacker]

Yeah it sounds like it's overstated to make it funny. It wouldn't be as funny if the ENFp sounded stable and mature, would it?

Though would any ENFps here stay with someone who felt it necessary to show them that they were being used? I sure wouldn't. So to that extent it's probably true.

[jessica129]

But yeah, people don't break up with me. I have to be the one to break it off. If they do break up, i entice them back then I do it to them.

Not if the guy doesn't want to come back, duh

oh but they always do ; )

[Expat]

oh but they always do ; )

1) That will change at some point, don't worry about that
2) The fact that you are the one to supposedly always (even as you admitted that this is not the case) break up is nothing to be proud of, rather the contrary
3) The only thing your statements show is your lack of judgement in choosing partners, and in your reasons for being with them (or breaking up with them)

[Polly_G]

Hmmm not sure about the INFj one here. I think that depends on who the INFj is with. My ex INFJ always contacts me when he needs a friend. We fight a lot if we spend too much time together but he always will call because he doesn't want to lose me as a friend.

I on the other hand, rarely call.

[FDG]

oh but they always do ; )

I feel like what you're implying in your post is some sneaky complex of superiority and disdain for the male race, however I don't want to say it.

Whoops, I just said it.

[jessica129]

Disdain for the male race? Wow, you sure have no clue what you're talking about.

[anndelise]

I agree with what you just said and I think it applies to both men and women. I hate games too.

Yeah, I didn't mean to imply that it's only men who play games. Men are actually pretty bad when it comes to game playing....women who do so are the worst, in my opinion.

[Expat]

Disdain for the male race? Wow, you sure have no clue what you're talking about.

*shrugs* well, his comments, as mine, were a logical conclusion based on the information you provided.

[flower]

ISTp:

The ISTp woman, being guided by her incomprehensible drives, can cease to show up to see you of her own accord - even before you see that you are not made for each other. But if your decision is already reached, and she is still there, act decisively. You will give her a list of your requirements - it does not matter what, provided that they began with the words: "you are obliged...", "you must...", and that they conclude with: "... you must do it more quickly!" Add flavor to this with stormy emotions. After this, you won't see the ISTp woman for a long time... as long as she, following her own impulses, does not show up at your door of her own accord.

That is soooo mean!
Dont tell anyone but..... that really would work. Shhh. :wink:

[schrödinger's cat]

It would work with ISTp men too, if what I know of them is correct. Being pressurized and obligated + stormy emotions = kaWOOM.

[SLeo123083]

An INFJ will only act that doormatish if they never liked you that much to begin with.

We will try to contact you in private, maybe even stalk you a bit secretly...although we'll rarely tell anybody about this, save maybe our closest friends. That's if we really like you and want you back. We'll also give you your time though, at least I would.

I usually try to send letters of people I really miss...if I care about them. This includes exes.

INFJs can seem quite fragile and harmless I know but... I dunno, for some reason we can REALLY really irritate a certain kind of...people? It's interesting.

[dreamer]

INFj:

No special measures are necessary to carry out the break up. If you decide to leave - you leave; neither reproaches nor scandals nor revenge will threaten you. Even if the INFj is slightly upset, she will try by all means not demonstrate this, and quietly she will disappear from your life.

Well, it's very hard to become attached at first so we usually have no problem ignoring the ones who do not fascinate us like brainless horny males who don't know how to have 'deep' conversations but once we do get attached, I think we have a VERY hard time letting go, especially if we don't understand why it's not working and so we'll keep trying till we lose all hope and it makes no sense to continue. But the deep attachment only forms with perhaps 1 percent of the population so nothing to worry about.

[SLeo123083]

Hell hath no fury like an INFJ scorned.

I think we have a lot of 'holy anger' built up. ::smiles::

[enfpgirl]

This is an interesting posting. About 2 years ago I went through a bad break up with someone who was either INTj or INFj. They gradually disengaged over about a year, all the time keeping a smile on their face and continuing on as usual. When it was over in their mind, they simply said we didn't have a connection with no other explanation and moved on to their already lined up new girlfriend - which they denied on top of everything else.

Hell knows no wrath like a scorned ENFp let me tell you who would have far preferred a blunt, straightforward, honest and timely break up - not after a year of disengaging. Have courage and be assertive and honest and provide some explanation so that we don't have to mull over it.

I don't agree with the statement that you should show an ENFp that you're using them. If someone is using me then I don't want be with them because I find this unethical and, yes, I'll be happy to end it. But surely we shouldn't be advising such an immature and manipulative approach.

[XoX]

Hell knows no wrath like a scorned ENFp let me tell you who would have far preferred a blunt, straightforward, honest and timely break up

This makes me think you would love my break up style

[meatburger]

I think from an emotional standpoint i actually find it very cute if the girl still likes me a little after the breakup. I have gone out with a couple of INFp's and even though it doesn't work they normally sms me and say they miss me which i find really nice, makes the break up easier for me lol. Also makes me like them more and be kind to them back. Im sure everyone is like this.

The ESFp had a much more brutal approach. Cheat on me with two guys then talk about them so i dumped her. But we haven't spoken and she doesn't give a stuff. That does make it harder to deal with. I think its about the perception of power, break ups are much easier if your doing the dumping.

[XoX]

I think its about the perception of power, break ups are much easier if your doing the dumping.

True I don't know what is the best style anymore. The one who gets dumped will get annoyed anyways.

[Slacker]

This is an interesting posting. About 2 years ago I went through a bad break up with someone who was either INTj or INFj. They gradually disengaged over about a year, all the time keeping a smile on their face and continuing on as usual. When it was over in their mind, they simply said we didn't have a connection with no other explanation and moved on to their already lined up new girlfriend - which they denied on top of everything else.

Hell knows no wrath like a scorned ENFp let me tell you who would have far preferred a blunt, straightforward, honest and timely break up - not after a year of disengaging. Have courage and be assertive and honest and provide some explanation so that we don't have to mull over it.

I don't agree with the statement that you should show an ENFp that you're using them. If someone is using me then I don't want be with them because I find this unethical and, yes, I'll be happy to end it. But surely we shouldn't be advising such an immature and manipulative approach.

It's supposed to be funny. Not that people *should* do that, just that it would work. Which it would.

[dreamer]

As an INFJ, I prefer closure so if the one I had my eyes on are not interested, then tell me straight forward, don't play around so I can move on or I wouldn't and I'll just keep thinking about it and trying to understand it when really there's not much to understand. Being a little attached might make the breakup easier but eventually it'll hurt if the other person still really cares so that's a bit of a dangerous territory. Would be nice if they explain it to me too. Just wanna understand, is that a crime, geez.

Oh yea, if I feel 'scorned' I'll kick your ass and I'm not afraid to step on you to not feel like I lost my pride or whatever.

[science as magic]

How to dump Delta women

in a lake with rocks tied to their ankles

(jk)

[UDP]

Hell hath no fury like an INFJ scorned.

I think we have a lot of 'holy anger' built up. ::smiles::

And how much so for the opposite?
What heaven!

(I would imagine)

Maybe I'll find out someday...

[Expat]

It's supposed to be funny. Not that people *should* do that, just that it would work. Which it would.

Yes you were almost the only person to realize that from be beginning.

[Expat]

but once we do get attached, I think we have a VERY hard time letting go, especially if we don't understand why it's not working and so we'll keep trying till we lose all hope and it makes no sense to continue. But the deep attachment only forms with perhaps 1 percent of the population so nothing to worry about.

In theory this should be common in Delta and Gamma.

[Delilah]

I like to give notice personally, maybe LSE expects as much. I'd like some notice as well, though i might have already deduced as much (might have beat them to it even).