I need some help identifying my type.
Apparently there seems to be quite a discrepancy between the way my partner, friends and family see me and the way I see myself.
Here is a list of traits that seem to be consistent - either as seen by others or as experienced by me.
According to other people
I am a very distinct person - people seem to think that I am very clear about what I think and who I am
(keep hearing this from all sorts of people both family and people I hardly know)
I am brutaly honest
(I don't think so myself as I frequently adjust my answers to soften the blow but if people ask my opinion I will give it - I will very seldom lie. After all - if I ask other people their opinion I want a truthful answer)
I am confrontational - will not back down from conflict
(I don't like to engage in confrontations but I will if I must)
I can be commanding and give orders easily
(I don't know, perhaps I do this but it is only to help and get people off their asses)
I am very analytical and organized
(yes and no, I do analyze anything and eaily see flaws in both thinking and plans - I am also very organized at work, but quite messy at home)
I am very independent and dislike asking for help
(very true - asking for help makes me feel weak)
How I experience myself in private
I dislike showing my emotions in public
(I never do If I can help it - except for anger)
I dislike outward displays of emotions - except the normal standard greetings and such.
(I get uncomfortable when people are very emotional and it also kinda pisses me off. I see it as overacting and emotinal manipulation. Sincerely dislike whiny people, martyrs and victims, no patience at all for that.
I am also troubled by emails an text that contains what I would call "emotional praise" - such as; Great job - hug! I don't mind the great job, but the hug? Whats up with that? It makes me mad when people do that because I don't see it as relevant and I really don't know how to respond.
Am I supposed to say "hug" in return? I don't want to, it would be insincere.)
I have very strong internal emotions
(They often appear to be completely out of proportion - these superstrong emotions mainly seem to be triggered by acts of cruelty done to innocent beings such as kids and animals etc. I know this is normal, but I can get severly upset for days and feel like I loose faith in God and human kind. I tend to avoid all news and stories about these things because of this.
I can be rather unfeeling about the faith of human kind otherwise, I tend to think that once grown up you are responible for your own actions and that it is naive to expect life to be fair.)
I believe in a higher power and I have a strong spiritual side but I abhor any form of organized religion.
(This is a private side of mine, one I never show in public like my emotions.)
I can have pretty wild mood swings
(Dark to light but I usually just wait them out and do something constructive like take a walk. I have learned never that they soon will pass and I don't let them interfer with my work)
I used to completely ignore my feelings
(With age I have learned that I need to experience them as in actually feel them - and that they do provide information if I allow them to be what they are.)
What confuses me is that how I appear and act seems to be consistend with an extroverted thinker or at least someone with thinking in the first or second position.
But I think it is all at odds with my strong emotions and also my spiritual side, not to mention the fact that I work in an artistic field. Should that not point to a feeling type?!
What does the experts at this board think?