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Thread: qualities you find most attractive in the opposite sex

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    Default qualities you find most attractive in the opposite sex

    I'll start.

    For me its definitely confidence followed by, swagger, affectionate, strong drive and an aggressive ambitious nature. Oh, and a good dresser, definitely. I'm a sucker for alpha males. lol

    Those sounds like SLE traits lol
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    I'll start.

    For me its definitely confidence followed by, swagger, affectionate, strong drive and an aggressive ambitious nature. Oh, and a good dresser, definitely. I'm a sucker for alpha males. lol

    Those sounds like SLE traits lol
    Males who possess all these traits, are usually not found on the internet.
    Last edited by Bluenoir; 12-03-2010 at 04:16 AM. Reason: Classified
    The mode of goodness conditions one to happiness, passion conditions him to the fruits of action, and ignorance to madness.

    Chapter 14, Verse 9.
    The Bhagavad Gita

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    Yeah. That's why I'll never date anyone that I've met on the internet.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    hah, i loled because that really does make me me think a lot of SLEs.

    "swagger" hahahaha.

    for me, i guess it's kind of hard to list a set of traits because it's more about individuals, but if i had to come up with some generalizations: calmness and strength - especially under pressure, sincerity, opinionated (but not too stubborn), an active/demonstrated concern for the people they care about.

    i can see my list describing an LSE pretty easily.

    edit: i wanted to add, because it's sort of a weird quirk i guess, that i'm not really attracted to men that dress too well. i don't like suits and brand names, lol...i'm attracted to the typical blue collar look, which is kind of funny since it's sort of a delta ST stereotype.

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    Intelligence, a quirky sense of humor, hair that's not blonde, and sincerity.

    ESTj
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    Quote Originally Posted by laghlagh View Post
    i don't like suits and brand names, lol...i'm attracted to the typical blue collar look
    I don't like brand names or the typical blue collar look. I like wearing pollo shirts, slacks, and bizarre socks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    bizarre socks.
    i approve.

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    Quote Originally Posted by laghlagh View Post
    i approve.
    I could knit you some if you live in the US and don't mind sending your address on the internet.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    hair that's not blonde
    The mode of goodness conditions one to happiness, passion conditions him to the fruits of action, and ignorance to madness.

    Chapter 14, Verse 9.
    The Bhagavad Gita

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    Big smiles

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peteronfireee View Post
    Big smiles

    Actually, I prefer gentle and happy smiles to big grins.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  12. #12
    Creepy-male

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    So here's my list of characteristics I find attractive

    Personality

    • Emotive -- Highly expressive of emotions, especially with eyes
    • Humor and Diplomacy -- Laughs at jokes, makes jokes to relieve tension between people, can accept difference in opinion, doesn't try to control the other person to appear popular or make them their toy pet (this is very critical in the long term)
    • Physically Expressive -- Moves fluid and not jerky or stiff, comfortable with physical contact, smooth touch, not grabby and forced and frantic, shows affection physically.
    • Has a Life -- Has something they do that means something to them, has interests, something unique. A hobby or artform if you will.
    • Conversationalist -- Easy to talk to, this one is mainly an intellectual thing, I don't care how intelligent they are or what credentials they have, so long as they are easy to talk to (I like to talk and discuss things)


    Physically

    • Dark Hair > Blond (imo), although certain blondes I find attractive also, redheads I find either hideous or extremely attractive
    • Usually white, hispanic, or indian/middle eastern not being racist, I have found black and asian girls attractive before. It's not that I dislike them out of a policy on race I have, its just I've never felt attraction towards them as much for whatever reason... but believe me I'm not racist and don't have anything against them as people at all.
    • NOT OBESE.... women don't have to starve themselves or have the best figure in the world, but obesity in males or females I find disgusting
    • Eyes are once again important
    • Movement is once again important
    • Preferably ectomorphic, amazon muscular chicks freak me out, obesity is out, but not aneroxic... curves and form is important. The sexiest part of a women is her back, side profile, legs, hips, etc. having a natural fluid form is 100% preferable to a starved form or a hyper-muscular form. I think everyone has a natural body type that they should work to fit into and not out of. Dressing to their form is also sexy, it shows awareness of their body and form, and also small details like how they move in what they wear is attractive.
    • I'm not big on plastic surgery, botox, massive breasts, and the like, once again form and fluidity..... sexiest stuff, I get turned on just looking at lines on a piece of paper or the curves on a mercedes, or smoke blowing over an airfoil and the like. Fake blondes with massive breasts are disgusting imo.
    • Smiles -- clever, dark, mysterious smile, almost smirk like.... over big happy grins and wide eyes


    - Basically fluid, confident, graceful, and engaging.... being cowlike and dumb or nervous and juvenille/tacky is bad bad bad.


    Also please, these are just my opinions, don't get offended at me if you disagree, I have respect for people even if I don't find them attractive, so its not like their are self-worth criteria for other people... they are just my tastes.... like something akin to "I like the color blue over green" or "I like chicken and not beef" or "I like dry humor over slapstick".... they are not criteria women have to meet to earn respect... so please don't call me a chauvinist for sharing my opinion.

    Thank you, /disclaimerend
    Last edited by male; 12-03-2010 at 05:09 AM.

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    Laughs a lot, jokes a lot, flirts a lot, plays a lot, and has great "Mom" potential.

    Quote Originally Posted by DA
    I like wearing pollo shirts, slacks, and bizarre socks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CILi View Post
    has great "Mom" potential
    That's me. I always thought I would be a practical choice for anyone who wants a family.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    I guess supportive, By your side, warm vibe, relaxed, sensitive to how I feel, and physical imitating.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

  16. #16
    Creepy-male

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    Quote Originally Posted by Isotope View Post
    Males who possess all these traits, are usually not found on the internet.
    Yea lol... I'd say that usually males on the internet who claim to possess those traits usually are the ones that possess them the least in reality.

    All the guys on the internet.... "Oh I can bench 400, I'm a good dresser, All the girls like me, I drive a porsche, Holla back at me girl, let me take a picture"

    *posts picture of guy in a polo shirt, white hat, popped collar, and disproportionately toned biceps and abs to the rest of his physique, short, stocky, arrogant smile*

    "See girl don't I look good, come on we'd be perfect together"......

    either that or a nerd who forgoes the picture posting but talks the same as the d-bag, when in reality he is bent over at his computer eating a hotpocket, making odd noises breathing noises while looking at pictures of women online.

    Typically these two types band together... the white hatted d-bag takes the lead and helps the nerd make his dreams of being a d-bag come true, in return of course for validating the d-bag lifestyle. Its like the serf paying homage to his liege. Popping a collar is like getting knighted as a d-bag. Dude Honestly Bro, Like I just like, you know... hahahahaha, dude honestly bro, like just.... ahh... calm down bro.... gawd lol you act like a faggot dude.... bro like no bitch is going..... seriously bro.... just watch like how I fucking....... you know..... dude honestly!

    I've made it a personal mission to avoid falling into this subculture. But, still I'd advise people to avoid internet dating... mainly because it takes face to face interaction to get to know a person... too much PR effort goes into the way people portray themselves on the internet, things have to flow smoothly in walking life to be effective.

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    I like big wide toothy confident smiles and direct eye contact.

    One of the biggest turn offs is when I can tell a man is intimidated or nervous around me. I find that pretty frustrating.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HaveLucidDreamz View Post
    Yea lol... I'd say that usually males on the internet who claim to possess those traits usually are the ones that possess them the least in reality.

    All the guys on the internet.... "Oh I can bench 400, I'm a good dresser, All the girls like me, I drive a porsche, Holla back at me girl, let me take a picture"

    *posts picture of guy in a polo shirt, white hat, popped collar, and disproportionately toned biceps and abs to the rest of his physique, short, stocky, arrogant smile*

    "See girl don't I look good, come on we'd be perfect together"......

    either that or a nerd who forgoes the picture posting but talks the same as the d-bag, when in reality he is bent over at his computer eating a hotpocket, making odd noises breathing noises while looking at pictures of women online.

    Typically these two types band together... the white hatted d-bag takes the lead and helps the nerd make his dreams of being a d-bag come true, in return of course for validating the d-bag lifestyle. Its like the serf paying homage to his liege. Popping a collar is like getting knighted as a d-bag. Dude Honestly Bro, Like I just like, you know... hahahahaha, dude honestly bro, like just.... ahh... calm down bro.... gawd lol you act like a faggot dude.... bro like no bitch is going..... seriously bro.... just watch like how I fucking....... you know..... dude honestly!
    You haven't met FDG yet.
    Not that he claims to be one, but it does prove that they are in the internet in the 21st century. Come on, someone who doesn't use the internet these days is like someone who doesn't use the toilet.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Um... sexiness. But that's sort of relative. I figured out my type is usually kinda thin-ish black girls (I mean, obviously most people are attracted to, you know, non-overweight-ness, but there are girls who are not at all overweight, and totally attractive, but not thin, like the probably-SLE girl I'm in a show with--who has a boyfriend). Quirkiness. Something to make me think she's not dull. Maybe something to "figure out" even, something to make me think she'll surprise me. I dunno. Someone interesting, which usually means non-predictable. I think I like an aggressive edge, but... subtle, maybe? Doesn't hurt if she's a dancer. Dancers are hot. And stay hot forever.

    Surprisingly, it's not so much big boobs as... I dunno... boob ratio? Like there's this girl with comparatively small-ish breasts (I mean, medium/normal sized, like a B cup I guess?), but she's kind of smallish and she wears clothes that show them off (not ho-ish-ly like you can see her bra all the time or she shows a whole lot of cleavage, just clothes that make her body look good), and so she looks really hot. I'm not attracted to pretty-pretty girls, like blond hair blue eyes miss america. I like girls with, well, like I said, something interesting, something unpredictable, something that makes you think there's more there than blond hair blue eyes and miss america. I mean, I'd probably have sex with blond hair blue eye miss america (who wouldn't?), but I wouldn't at all be interested in a relationship with that kind of girl.

    I mean, above all, it's about the feeling you get. You can make a list of a thousand qualities that do a good job of predicting your "type" and most of the people who have those qualities you'll match with decently, but you can never predict what will lead to that "magic."


    rofl. I didn't think my list sounded very beta until I read everybody else's.
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    You haven't met FDG yet, not that he claims to be one, but it does prove that they are in the internet in the 21st century. Come on, someone who doesn't use the internet these days is like someone who doesn't use the toilet.
    Yea there are good prospective men on the internet, I'm just saying that its easy to deceive on the internet. I've never really adapted to the idea honestly, I use the internet mainly as a sort of alternate reality or subculture, and I keep it isolated fairly diligently from my "real" life in reality.

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    all Italians are like that by nature, numbers. It's in their blood.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    Come on, someone who doesn't use the internet these days is like someone who doesn't use the toilet.
    lmfao

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    Quote Originally Posted by HaveLucidDreamz View Post
    Yea there are good prospective men on the internet, I'm just saying that its easy to deceive on the internet. I've never really adapted to the idea honestly, I use the internet mainly as a sort of alternate reality or subculture, and I keep it isolated fairly diligently from my "real" life in reality.
    +6.758
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    all Italians are like that by nature, numbers. It's in their blood.
    Yea, But I remember I like his facial structure. They do in a way have a common attractive look, so I see what you're saying.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

  25. #25
    Creepy-male

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    all Italians are like that by nature, numbers. It's in their blood.
    Yea I would agree latin cultures are much more romantic and stylish or whatever.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HaveLucidDreamz View Post
    Yea I would agree latin cultures are much more romantic and stylish or whatever.
    actually I always find Latin and Italian romance pretty similar, don't you think?
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Isotope View Post
    Males who possess all these traits, are usually not found on the internet.
    Everyone has and frequently uses internet nowadays...perhaps it could be said that such males cannot be found in personality forums. I'd agree with that, probably. However, for example, I have an SLE friend which is a programmer, yet still fits the typical personality patterns of SLEs...
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    I disagree that the internet is so apart from real life like that.

    Your true self comes out on the internet more often than you think.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I disagree that the internet is so apart from real life like that.

    Your true self comes out on the internet more often than you think.

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    For me personally, the most important traits would be intelligence (combined with) a sense for ethics, honesty, dependability, friendliness (that's more or less something everyone expects...), economical thinking and also maturity.
    „Man can do what he wants but he cannot want what he wants.“
    – Arthur Schopenhauer

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    As far as personality, above all else, I need to be with someone who is easy to talk to. It's hard to say what kind of person that is because I've dated a variety of girls from the highly emotive party girl to the solid and stubborn type and I could probably pick something out of each that was lacking in the others.

    I find that I prefer girls with some 'substance.' By that I mean someone who has some attitude, and isn't too fragile, but also friendly. Girls who have some confidence, but are still 'feminine.' I like girls that I can mess with and won't take it too personally, but will still have some fire. A nice balance between independent and dependent. I like to feel like they need my help every once in a while and that they rely on me, but they can't be incapable themselves. I'd prefer somone who is level-head and responsible, but still wants to have fun once in while. Overall just someone who is really balanced and also driven or passionate about something.
    3w4-5w6-9w8

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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    One of the biggest turn offs is when I can tell a man is intimidated or nervous around me. I find that pretty frustrating.
    I agree about being intimidated. Guys shouldn't be intimidated by girls, even if I try to intimidate them sometimes. However, I'm bored by a guy who's as forceful and blunt as I am. It would be better to be a little nervous but not enough to inhibit a conversation.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    Coldest of the Socion EyeSeeCold's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    I agree about being intimidated. Guys shouldn't be intimidated by girls, even if I try to intimidate them sometimes.

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    CILi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HeSeeCold
    Is only test?


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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    I agree about being intimidated. Guys shouldn't be intimidated by girls, even if I try to intimidate them sometimes. However, I'm bored by a guy who's as forceful and blunt as I am. It would be better to be a little nervous but not enough to inhibit a conversation.
    You're too demanding.

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    Executor MatthewZ's Avatar
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    Giant breasts. Definitely giant breasts.

  37. #37
    Snomunegot munenori2's Avatar
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    Outgoing, funny, intelligent, quirky, and self-confident.




    Quote Originally Posted by MatthewZ View Post
    Giant breasts. Definitely giant breasts.

  38. #38
    wants to be a writer. silverchris9's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Azeroffs View Post
    As far as personality, above all else, I need to be with someone who is easy to talk to. It's hard to say what kind of person that is because I've dated a variety of girls from the highly emotive party girl to the solid and stubborn type and I could probably pick something out of each that was lacking in the others.

    I find that I prefer girls with some 'substance.' By that I mean someone who has some attitude, and isn't too fragile, but also friendly. Girls who have some confidence, but are still 'feminine.' I like girls that I can mess with and won't take it too personally, but will still have some fire. A nice balance between independent and dependent. I like to feel like they need my help every once in a while and that they rely on me, but they can't be incapable themselves. I'd prefer somone who is level-head and responsible, but still wants to have fun once in while. Overall just someone who is really balanced and also driven or passionate about something.
    lol. i.e., an ESI. This sounds quite a bit like ESI. Gamma rational dyad is the most "sane" out of all of them, imo.
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    One of the biggest turn offs is when I can tell a man is intimidated or nervous around me. I find that pretty frustrating.
    UGH, yeah. It's not just guys who do that that I want nothing to do with, but girls too. When people act like that with me, I probobly won't ever talk to them again. They don't really demand any sort of respect. Basically anyone who lacks confidence annoys me to the point I just want to get super aggressive and scare them even more.

    About what traits attract me...I tend to go for alpha males too. What girl wouldn't? I guess I tend to like the crazies a little more. People who standout.

  40. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    UGH, yeah. It's not just guys who do that that I want nothing to do with, but girls too. When people act like that with me, I probobly won't ever talk to them again. They don't really demand any sort of respect. Basically anyone who lacks confidence annoys me to the point I just want to get super aggressive and scare them even more.
    this made me lol at the idea that you were ever typed SLI.

    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    About what traits attract me...I tend to go for alpha males too.
    when people talk about "alpha males" i'm not really sure what they mean. like i can conjure up an image in my head but i wonder if everybody sees it the same way.

    big muscles? aggressiveness? money?

    ehh.

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