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Thread: Type a child?

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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    Default Type a child?

    Is it possible to fully type a child? I asked someone about this in a PM conversation and she said yes, with qualifications. So, I'll post some photos of my son, who's seven, and see what folks come up with. This isn't, like, a VI "test," so I'll give info about his personality. Of course, I'm not so objective, as I'm his mom, and I'm never sure what information is most relevant.

    He seems to be introverted. Setting aside that he's shy, which kids can grow out of, he doesn't take social initiative but waits for others to approach. Then he gets along well with them, with occasional fights. He's very smart but also very emotional--I call him the Drama King. Takes things very personally. Very sensitive overall. Intense, not easygoing. Gets moody, grumpy, a little melancholy compared to other kids. Not all that socially adept.

    He's pretty tall for his age, and he's thin, was born thin/long. He'll probably end up at 6'2'' or so.

    Has a huge vocabulary for his age, deeply into the Hardy Boys at this point. Has surprised me by being good at math so far, really enjoying it more than I ever did. He can beat me in many games of strategy. He remembers patterns and distances in various board games, or with cards he can work out his hand a few turns in advance, etc., which I suck at.

    Likes to travel, likes adventure. Likes museums, cities--not necessarily the kid attractions, although those are fine too. Very, very fast runner (compared to other boys his age), great stamina (can ride his bike for 14-16 miles on hilly terrain). Good at cross-country skiing. Excellent manual dexterity. He is not a daredevil, though, compared to some other boys his age. More cautious.

    He pays a lot of attention to his environment, notices details. Watches me drive and asks me questions about that, will point out when someone's driving poorly. He's good at navigating sidewalks, parking lots, trails, etc.

    He surprises me with being sort of philosophical. He enjoys discussions on "big things," like human perception and the nature of the solar system--limited by his age level, of course. Last year we had an ongoing discussion/exploration of the history of roadways--how they came to be how they are today, and why. He enjoys learning facts, but only if the facts are well contextualized, as he seems a little bit oriented toward the big picture. BUT that may be a result of my guidance, since I'm a big-pic gal.

    Great sense of humor. Likes to invent his own words and/or distort language. Hard worker. Perfectionist about schoolwork but sloppy about most other things. Slightly competitive.

    His most outstanding talent so far is in visual art. He has drawn and painted some truly amazing things and can spend hours at it, creating a sort of series of pictures that all have the same theme. Invented superheroes and their nemeses (like Frying Pan Man and Bacon Boy). Or a 15-foot long road race that you have to unfurl across the room to understand (papers taped together, continuous road, one car per page, etc.). This is all very open-ended. He constantly comes up with new approaches to make art, and he likes to look at books of artworks, and discuss what he sees there or in galleries. Clear ideas of what he does/doesn't like visually, what matches/doesn't match, is/isn't beautiful or interesting.

    Not sure what else is distinct from what most every kid is like.

    Photos going slightly backward in time from last week, with one shot from when he was quite a bit younger that shows more clearly what his eyes are like:













    Last edited by golden; 10-08-2010 at 01:31 AM.
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    Angel of Lightning Brilliand's Avatar
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    Hmm... I'm gonna guess INFp (I thought Dynamic->Intuitive->Introvert->Feeler, in that order) - looking only at the pictures, though the description fits with that typing OK too.



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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brilliand View Post
    Hmm... I'm gonna guess INFp (I thought Dynamic->Intuitive->Introvert->Feeler, in that order) - looking only at the pictures, though the description fits with that typing OK too.
    LOL, that's what I'm afraid of. He's an awful lot like me. But I do see a difference in that where I was into performing arts, he prefers visual. And he seems more attuned to the environment, more aware of everything rather than lost in his own little world like I was.

    I suppose I won the genetic war with his ESTj father, whom he bears no resemblance to physically and isn't much like personality-wise, either.

    Me as kid:









    Third from right, front row:

    Last edited by golden; 10-08-2010 at 01:29 AM.
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    you can go to where your heart is Galen's Avatar
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    Holy crap the kid in the OP's pictures has huuuuuge eyes. Not sure about type though.

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    I thought IEI as well, but that was due to the "Drama King" thing. Otherwise, the description sounds fairly Alpha NT to me. Despite the social introversion, I think ILE seems like a good possibility. He sounds outwardly-focused to me, and ILEs are not exactly known for their social skills -- they can be surprisingly socially withdrawn, especially when they're young.
    Quaero Veritas.

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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    @ Krig: Cool. I will investigate that type for him. My first boyfriend was ILE, so I have at least one good personal yardstick.

    @ Galen: No kidding. The eyes seem to be getting bigger with each generation in my family line. (Neoteny?)
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    So far ILE fits him pretty darned well--nice, Krig! Most of the adults around him figure he'll end up being an architect or some kind of engineer, something that's potentially a combination of scientific and creative.

    He is incredibly hungry for information and has tons of imagination. (If those things are not fed he gets really cranky; this can be exhausting.) His IQ is very, very high; his memory is amazing. BUT he's kind of wacky and impractical, lol, and definitely chaotic. The idea of his social iffiness not being introversion but being more because of the PoLR/Role block could make a heckuva lot of sense. His biggest problems are with the intersection of sensory overload and ensuing interpersonal clashes, OR interpersonal clashes that cause sensory insult. As in, he's receiving occupational therapy for this problem. Interesting.

    Some of the little details in the Filatova description are telling--he is incredibly gallant and protective toward little girls, always rushing in to help them when they're hurt, lolol. It's cute.

    He also has a tendency to create games and structures to draw other kids in. He might create a giant boat out of various materials, or design some vast sea turtle and entertain other children while they watch it develop. His friends are very important to him--could end up being like my ILE first boyfriend, who was deeply invested in his "circle of friends" but even as an adult didn't come off as an overwhelmingly extraverted person in every situation. He tended to drive the social dynamic with projects--artwork, rock bands, later on an alternative school that he tied in to a university research program.

    My son does somewhat better with me offering him than with my ex's do-it-this-way-now leading . My son and I tend to clash at times simply because I cannot keep up with his need for input. His dad and he tend to clash over restrictive practical rules being imposed. My son doesn't fully get my form of emotionality and can be pretty insensitive about such things. His own emotionality seems to be more like huge blowups over perceived injustices. It's very hard to win an argument with him, gah.

    Anyway, lots of food for thought here. Thanks for giving me a place to start!
    Last edited by golden; 10-08-2010 at 04:32 AM.
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    awww, what a cutie! I think he definitely looks inuitive in those pics.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Kids are very very hard to type; the little girl seems like INFp or INFj
    The boy is a P type, can make out the other functions.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    Kids are very very hard to type; the little girl seems like INFp or INFj
    The boy is a P type, can make out the other functions.
    Lol, the little girl is me, so you've got that one right.

    My son is P, yes. The other functions, yeah--I've struggled to pinpoint these. It's especially hard when it's your own kid, because there's so little objectivity. I've been worried he's my type, but this thread is helping me to see the ways in which he is different. Even just looking at those photos--what he is doing, how he is doing them, and his more active and engaged attitude--show me more of what he's about.

    Thinking more about the ILE idea ... The Filatova explanation of Mirage relations fit with my son and me, and his dad being his benefactor, too. Also, one of my close friends is an ISFp artist, and I like to get my son together with her and have been hoping when he's older that he could spend some significant time with her. If he's IEE and she's his dual, that would explain why I think he needs some of what she offers.

    So I appreciate the indulgence--understanding your own kid is sort of important.
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    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    Lol, the little girl is me, so you've got that one right.

    My son is P, yes. The other functions, yeah--I've struggled to pinpoint these. It's especially hard when it's your kid, because there's so little objectivity. I've been worried he's my type, but this thread is helping me to see the ways in which he is different. Even just looking at those photos--what he is doing, how he is doing them, and his more active and engaged attitude--show me more of what he's about.

    So I appreciate the indulgence--understanding your own kid is sort of important.

    You shouldn't be worried, you have a great type and all the best to him if he is your type. I think it will make your communication to him very good.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    take a second of me sarinana's Avatar
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    I think intuitive and rational
    Sincerely Yours,

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    Contrarian Traditionalist Krig the Viking's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    So far ILE fits him pretty darned well--nice, Krig!
    Excellent! For me there are few things more enjoyable than an independent confirmation of a logical deduction.
    Quaero Veritas.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    You shouldn't be worried, you have a great type and all the best to him if he is your type. I think it will make your communication to him very good.
    If he were INFp, fine, but ... I think Krig has it nailed. It would be easier for me to parent my son if we were identicals, of course, but in fact it is hard for me to parent him! Considering another type for him helps here. The kid being ILE would explain a LOT. And there are almost no alphas in either of our families, so ... my longstanding feeling that I need to find some good grownup mentors for him may have an objective basis. His current teacher is classic ESFJ--and he loves her. He needs that kind of influence in his life.
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarinana View Post
    I think intuitive and rational
    Thanks for chiming in. Everyone seems to agree on intuitive. What makes you conclude rational?

    When I consider the question of rational vs. irrational, one thing I note is that when his dad and I were still together, my son and I seemed to live according to one rhythm, and his father had a separate rhythm. Left to our own devices, my son and I are pretty free-wheeling and go out on adventures and keep things loose. Around the home, I work on my projects, he works on his. We eat when we feel like it, we come up with things on the spur of the moment.

    When his father is involved, things have to be orderly, scheduled, predictable. Caused a lot of tension.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krig the Viking View Post
    Excellent! For me there are few things more enjoyable than an independent confirmation of a logical deduction.
    Btw, my mom thinks my son is like Howard Hughes, and I noticed he's typed as ENTp somewhere on this forum.
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    Contrarian Traditionalist Krig the Viking's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    Btw, my mom thinks my son is like Howard Hughes, and I noticed he's typed as ENTp somewhere on this forum.
    I really don't know much about Howard Hughes, but yeah, ILEs are widely known as being one of the most eccentric types in the socion. They're called "Don Quixote" for a reason.
    Quaero Veritas.

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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krig the Viking View Post
    I really don't know much about Howard Hughes, but yeah, ILEs are widely known as being one of the most eccentric types in the socion. They're called "Don Quixote" for a reason.
    My ILE boyfriend was definitely extremely eccentric! Hm. Well, as I said, things are possibly starting to make more sense. "It was good to meet your son today. What a bright and ... interesting little boy." Lololol.
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    SLE

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    Quote Originally Posted by atropos View Post
    SLE
    Hi, atropos. (Welcome!!!!!)

    Would you be willing to give a basis for that typing?
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    six turnin', four burnin' stevENTj's Avatar
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    Based on your descriptions and the photos I'd say ILE is certainly plausible. There's a notable ILE at work and your sons expressions show a resemblance to this person. He sounds incredibly creative and quite imaginitive! He's probably having issues with some of his dad's rules because he feels as though it's stifling his imagination and creativitly. Certainly might be a challenge if he's an ILE and his dad is an LSE.
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    Feeling fucking fantastic golden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by stevENTj View Post
    Based on your descriptions and the photos I'd say ILE is certainly plausible. There's a notable ILE at work and your sons expressions show a resemblance to this person. He sounds incredibly creative and quite imaginitive! He's probably having issues with some of his dad's rules because he feels as though it's stifling his imagination and creativitly. Certainly might be a challenge if he's an ILE and his dad is an LSE.
    Thanks for commenting. Understanding my child is important to me!!!! Um, I hesitate to ask what your ILE co-worker is notable for.

    The longer I let ILE gestate as a possible type for him, the more it makes sense--it seems sort of obvious, like I should have been able to figure that out on my own! But now I officially Krig, and ing is always good.

    I think the ILE/LSE pairing between my son and his dad is okay for now. The boy needs stability and (sometimes) to know what to expect, and just a sense of simple physical comfort, and his dad provides that. These are things that little kids often do need just because they are little, of course. My suspicion--which long predates this thread--is that as my son gets older, their dynamic will become more of a problem, and my son could increasingly look to me for release from it. They already argue quite a bit, and when his father and I were married, I was the one who smoothed it all over, soothed the child, and protected him--occasionally--from over-harsh punishment. (Mostly I think parents should form a united front, even if they hate e/other, ha, so I would only very subtly undercut his dad's rigid rules.)

    Luckily, the kid is in a very arts-rich school environment that encourages creativity and harmony all day long. Possibly unluckily, that same school takes academics a bit more slowly (although it will eventually become a lot more advanced than mainstream schools). Also, the school's emphasis on intensive socialization has just been really hard for him. He has often felt like a failure after the school day ended, but finally he's getting a chance to do some academic work and is thriving.

    I'm a little worried--I wish I could offer him something better than Mirage, lol. At least I don't interfere with him too much.
    Last edited by golden; 10-11-2010 at 11:02 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    Is it possible to fully type a child?
    I do have some children fully typed. Wouldn't know does every kid have a type.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Trevor View Post
    I do have some children fully typed. Wouldn't know does every kid have a type.
    To my mind, type is inherent and present from birth, but it unfolds as the person's life unfolds, and it is supported/unsupported and affected by the environment.

    I would imagine that with some children, type is easier to spot, and that the older they get, the more it becomes evident. I don't think my child could have been typed on this forum when he was three. Not because he had no type, but because it wasn't yet enough in evidence. So my question arose because I wondered: At what point is enough of the child's personality in play for typing to become possible? I've been mulling this over lately and thought this thread might help me to answer that question.

    The way I approach parenting is to imagine my son at age 28 or so and work backward from that. I had dreams about him before he was ever even conceived that gave me a fairly good idea of what kind of person he would be. I make a lot of my decisions about how to support him based on that broader understanding of who he is. But the challenges of daily life can muddle things.

    So I'm really pleased to be able to use Socionics--with you guys' help--to gain a clearer picture of what he might be about.
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    Contrarian Traditionalist Krig the Viking's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    But now I officially Krig, and ing is always good.
    :redface:



    [Edit: I should add that it's quite clear to me that children already have distinct sociotypes. I've heard anecdotal evidence that even in the womb, different kids have different levels of activity (kicking, moving around, etc.) which carries over to their personalities as they grow up (the more active babies becoming extraverts as they grow up, the less active ones becoming introverts as they grow up, etc.). It's an interesting area in which not much study has been done.]
    Last edited by Krig the Viking; 10-12-2010 at 05:35 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Golden View Post
    To my mind, type is inherent and present from birth, but it unfolds as the person's life unfolds, and it is supported/unsupported and affected by the environment.

    I would imagine that with some children, type is easier to spot, and that the older they get, the more it becomes evident. I don't think my child could have been typed on this forum when he was three. Not because he had no type, but because it wasn't yet enough in evidence. So my question arose because I wondered: At what point is enough of the child's personality in play for typing to become possible? I've been mulling this over lately and thought this thread might help me to answer that question.
    That's a big reason for my continued interest in Socionics -- parenting.

    My daughter is 3-1/2 and she exhibits A LOT of and , so I'm pretty darned sure she's a Gamma-SF. I noticed very early on that she had insanely good physical space awareness, and did great with shapes and colors, which is probably mostly . It's also apparent via VI that she's got strong . The in the past year has come on strong. Before that I was wondering if she was maybe SLE, but I think she's most likely ESI right now, identical to my wife, and yet another activity for me, or possibly SEE. Is it any wonder I'm so tired all the time?

    My son is 19 months. Too soon to tell much, but he's probably closer to me in personality and less like my wife. Not nearly as good physical space awareness, but has always been intensely curious about how things work. There's things he's figured out how to work or use that our daughter still hasn't, so clearly a different preference for functions. Add some VI into the mix and I think he might actually be an type, maybe SLI? But my folks say he's almost an exact carbon copy of me when I was his age both in terms of behavior and also looks, so maybe he's an ILI like his old man.
    Te-INTp/ILI, my wife: Fi-ISFj/ESI, with laser beam death rays for ESTp/SLEs, lol
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krig the Viking View Post
    [Edit: I should add that it's quite clear to me that children already have distinct sociotypes. I've heard anecdotal evidence that even in the womb, different kids have different levels of activity (kicking, moving around, etc.) which carries over to their personalities as they grow up (the more active babies becoming extraverts as they grow up, the less active ones becoming introverts as they grow up, etc.). It's an interesting area in which not much study has been done.]
    Both of our kids kicked the crap out of my wife before they were born.

    And they're both extremely active now and always have been. Neither of them are really the type that can sit and play quietly for awhile. Always busy and always into something. You can't take your eyes off of either of them for even a minute, and they really do drain every bit of energy out of you that you have. I don't think that being active is automatically synonymous with extroversion though, and vice versa. That sounds more MBTI-ish to me.
    Te-INTp/ILI, my wife: Fi-ISFj/ESI, with laser beam death rays for ESTp/SLEs, lol
    16 years of bliss in an Activity relationship

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    Quote Originally Posted by stevENTj View Post
    That's a big reason for my continued interest in Socionics -- parenting.

    My daughter is 3-1/2 and she exhibits A LOT of and , so I'm pretty darned sure she's a Gamma-SF. I noticed very early on that she had insanely good physical space awareness, and did great with shapes and colors, which is probably mostly . It's also apparent via VI that she's got strong . The in the past year has come on strong. Before that I was wondering if she was maybe SLE, but I think she's most likely ESI right now, identical to my wife, and yet another activity for me, or possibly SEE. Is it any wonder I'm so tired all the time?

    My son is 19 months. Too soon to tell much, but he's probably closer to me in personality and less like my wife. Not nearly as good physical space awareness, but has always been intensely curious about how things work. There's things he's figured out how to work or use that our daughter still hasn't, so clearly a different preference for functions. Add some VI into the mix and I think he might actually be an type, maybe SLI? But my folks say he's almost an exact carbon copy of me when I was his age both in terms of behavior and also looks, so maybe he's an ILI like his old man.
    Cool! I really am glad I'm not the only one here who has a kid/kids and sees Socionics as a way to (among many other things) be a more effective parent. I knew early on that my son was like me in some ways (P) but not in others, and maybe as I learn more about Socionics, type will be easier for me to see in younger and younger children. I mean, put a bunch of five-year-olds together and you see how starkly different their personalities already are. And how some fare very well in certain environments and with certain adults, and others ... um, don't.

    And since I'm not married now, I also think that it's good for me to understand that if I eventually re-partner, of the types I would do well with, some will affect my son more positively than others ... All the good intentions in the world may not be able to overcome a major mismatch; I certainly experienced that when my parents remarried. :\
    Last edited by golden; 10-13-2010 at 02:39 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goldilocks View Post
    Your son looks EXTp to me. From your description ENTp seems more likely though.

    Here is a Myers Briggs link to personality type portraits for children which I have found to be quite useful:
    Kids' Personality Portraits
    Thank you, Goldilocks. Yeah, I don't think he could be ESTp. I'll take a look at the linked material.
    LSI: “I still can’t figure out Pinterest.”

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