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Thread: Undualized IEIs-INFps and anxiety/stress

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    Default Undualized IEIs-INFps and anxiety/stress

    Is anxiety a common theme? And does the introduction of Se tend to reverse it over time?
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    getting a dose of your DS function is going to make ANY type less anxious - 'Calming Effect', etc.
    <Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" is and not

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    Quote Originally Posted by thePirate View Post
    getting a dose of your DS function is going to make ANY type less anxious - 'Calming Effect', etc.
    Yeah, a natural anti-neurotic drug.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Is anxiety a common theme? And does the introduction of Se tend to reverse it over time?
    in short, yes.

    example: the ONLY times over the course of my life that I've been able to stop biting my nails has been when I'm in relatively close contact with Se. I dated ESI for awhile and we were close for a year or two before that and I completely stopped. Then once he was out of my life, I started in again. I'm doing pretty well right now because I have a couple of SLE friends but they aren't in my daily life and I'm not getting enough Se so it's touch and go. But yeah, it's pretty weird how directly related it's been in that area for me.

    Undualized IEIs can also suppress their Fe. Depending on who they spend most of their time with. In my case, being married to ESE, I found that my Fe wasn't needed so I just kind of discounted it across the board. It's depressing to feel like what you have to offer isn't needed.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    in short, yes.

    example: the ONLY times over the course of my life that I've been able to stop biting my nails has been when I'm in relatively close contact with Se. I dated ESI for awhile and we were close for a year or two before that and I completely stopped. Then once he was out of my life, I started in again. I'm doing pretty well right now because I have a couple of SLE friends but they aren't in my daily life and I'm not getting enough Se so it's touch and go. But yeah, it's pretty weird how directly related it's been in that area for me.

    Undualized IEIs can also suppress their Fe. Depending on who they spend most of their time with. In my case, being married to ESE, I found that my Fe wasn't needed so I just kind of discounted it across the board. It's depressing to feel like what you have to offer isn't needed.
    Do you think this is because they have lots of focus and attention to what's going on with people around them? What do you think they see when they look at you biting your nails for instance?

    My SEE friend is always giving me interesting options on what we will do with my hair and what color clothing we will pick out for events and such.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    Do you think this is because they have lots of focus and attention to what's going on with people around them? What do you think they see when they look at you biting your nails for instance?
    I don't know, but I do know that it's not about them and what they think of me. It's more about my internal state. It's like this feeling of groundedness that I get from the Se that translates to me feeling less anxious and thus not biting my nails. It's a subconscious thing, for the most part. It's not like I'm worried about what they think. It just... happens.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    It's funny, because I get extremely anxious about a few things and then I'm 100% chill about everything else. I'm extremely indecisive, but my indecisiveness doesn't create anxiety. Maybe it's because my little brother is SEE, and I have a lot of close beta friends (my best friend in elementary/middle school is LSI and we still hang out, and one of my best friends in college is SLE). I'm only really anxious about things that I have failed to do, but even then, it's like sudden anxiety for an hour or so and then it dissipates.
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silverchris9 View Post
    It's funny, because I get extremely anxious about a few things and then I'm 100% chill about everything else. I'm extremely indecisive, but my indecisiveness doesn't create anxiety. Maybe it's because my little brother is SEE, and I have a lot of close beta friends (my best friend in elementary/middle school is LSI and we still hang out, and one of my best friends in college is SLE). I'm only really anxious about things that I have failed to do, but even then, it's like sudden anxiety for an hour or so and then it dissipates.
    I'm sure that's helped you. My FIRST experience with a Se-ego wasn't until I met the ESI when I was 14 (around the same time I also met a female ESI so between the two of them I was getting a decent amount of Se). We were friends until I was 18 and then we dated until 19. Etc. But.. yeah.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    We were friends until I was 18 and then we dated until 19. Etc. But.. yeah.
    lol Does that mean "Fail."?

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    Ezra, your avatar looks like one of my best friends from childhood.
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

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    Yeah. I agree with DS functions feeling calming and anti-neurotic. But a lot of types can give you Se if you need it, even non Se-valuers. You just sort have to ask for it and know what you're asking for... sometimes it can come up accidentally. The problem is asking somebody to behave unnaturally for them to make you feel better, doesn't last long.

    You can also dualize yourself like celebrities do.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silverchris9 View Post
    Ezra, your avatar looks like one of my best friends from childhood.
    It is BORISKA! Indigo child from MARS.........

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    lol Does that mean "Fail."?
    pretty much.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    in short, yes.

    example: the ONLY times over the course of my life that I've been able to stop biting my nails has been when I'm in relatively close contact with Se.
    Yah there's not much contact with Se in my life right now, instead of biting my nails I pick at my lips, well mostly my bottom one. Pick pick rip. When I successfully pick off a big spankin sliver in one semi-immaculate chunk I feel embarrassingly happy for myself. Truly, often the highlight of my day. Wow.
    INFp-Ni

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Is anxiety a common theme? And does the introduction of Se tend to reverse it over time?
    I get anxious in situation involving new people. It takes me ages to speak up and when I do I take great offence if I’m a) not heard or b) ignored as it has taken me all my courage to express my feelings or say what’s on my mind. So my anxiety is caused by imagining situations involving new people where the following happens
    1) I sit in the room everyone speaks except me and in my narcissistic scenario they all think about me later and how little I contributed
    2) I try to speak up and get shouted down or people roll their eyes expressing their disapproval for my opinion
    3) I have something on my nose, face or my blouse is unbuttoned and I don’t notice
    I think IEIs experience anxiety because of their powerful imaginations working against them.
    When an ESTp is around the following happens
    1) When I build up the courage to speak my opinion is usually validated with “yes” or the ESTp will then finish the sentence which I love as it takes the pressure off me having to do it.
    2) I have never been left hanging by an ESTp you will always get a response to a statement or a question in my experience
    3) I reckon if your blouse was unbuttoned an ESTp would be the first to notice
    Not sure if this is Se or just ESTps in general. Over time my anxiety is reduced as this pattern of behaviour is reinforced, I feel safe that everything will be ok if the ESTp is there. It then extends to situations where ESTp is not involved as your confidence starts to build.

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    Quote Originally Posted by IEI View Post
    I think IEIs experience anxiety because of their powerful imaginations working against them.
    When an ESTp is around the following happens
    1) When I build up the courage to speak my opinion is usually validated with “yes” or the ESTp will then finish the sentence which I love as it takes the pressure off me having to do it.
    2) I have never been left hanging by an ESTp you will always get a response to a statement or a question in my experience
    3) I reckon if your blouse was unbuttoned an ESTp would be the first to notice
    Not sure if this is Se or just ESTps in general. Over time my anxiety is reduced as this pattern of behaviour is reinforced, I feel safe that everything will be ok if the ESTp is there. It then extends to situations where ESTp is not involved as your confidence starts to build.
    yes, exactly. I feel slightly more relaxed just reading this.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    yes, exactly. I feel slightly more relaxed just reading this.
    They are fun to play fight with too

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    Quote Originally Posted by IEI View Post
    I get anxious in situation involving new people. It takes me ages to speak up.
    This only happens to me with new people and hot SLE guys haha. Hate.
    IEI, sp/sx 4w3.

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    One good thing about Betas: not so much bullshit-talking and overtalking or overtyping on topics. Just say what you mean and that´s it. No need to make long paragraphs to discuss silly things and waste one more fucking minute of your miserable life in a meaningless and ultimately purposeless and useless internet forum (unless you can meet someone here to date and/or fuck or get money with).

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    in fact I´m relieved of having seen that I´m not delta, and those endless posts about Disney movies were not coming from my quadra.

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    LAWL.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Airborne View Post
    in fact I´m relieved of having seen that I´m not delta, and those endless posts about Disney movies were not coming from my quadra.
    Not every Delta watches disney movies; understand the difference between Te/Ti and maybe look at some examples please before you change your typing, besides, that was a very interesting effort that Ryu made to offer discussion/perspective and entertainment.
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

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    Quote Originally Posted by Air View Post
    One good thing about Betas: not so much bullshit-talking and overtalking or overtyping on topics. Just say what you mean and that´s it. No need to make long paragraphs to discuss silly things and waste one more fucking minute of your miserable life in a meaningless and ultimately purposeless and useless internet forum (unless you can meet someone here to date and/or fuck or get money with).
    YES. i have an ESxj teacher who is the complete opposite. she says things in 50 words that the rest of the human race say in 3. most people would say: i am hungry. but she'd be like:i had a bagel this morning and it was so delicious and i ate it and oh my god it was good. then here i'm talking to you and my stomachs growling and i'm like uh oh i need another bagel. i just do. i really do.
    then i'm like: KILL ME NOW.

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    It depends if the INFp is ready to leave their issues behind. If they get out into the world then the anxiety fades as expected.

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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post
    Yah there's not much contact with Se in my life right now, instead of biting my nails I pick at my lips, well mostly my bottom one. Pick pick rip. When I successfully pick off a big spankin sliver in one semi-immaculate chunk I feel embarrassingly happy for myself. Truly, often the highlight of my day. Wow.
    Cease and desist!!!

    (srsly, please don't do that... start eating sunflower seeds or something if you have an oral fixation, but don't scar yourself )

    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    You can also dualize yourself like celebrities do.
    lol

    Quote Originally Posted by IEI View Post
    I get anxious in situation involving new people. It takes me ages to speak up and when I do I take great offence if I’m a) not heard or b) ignored as it has taken me all my courage to express my feelings or say what’s on my mind. So my anxiety is caused by imagining situations involving new people where the following happens
    1) I sit in the room everyone speaks except me and in my narcissistic scenario they all think about me later and how little I contributed
    2) I try to speak up and get shouted down or people roll their eyes expressing their disapproval for my opinion
    3) I have something on my nose, face or my blouse is unbuttoned and I don’t notice
    I think IEIs experience anxiety because of their powerful imaginations working against them.
    When an ESTp is around the following happens
    1) When I build up the courage to speak my opinion is usually validated with “yes” or the ESTp will then finish the sentence which I love as it takes the pressure off me having to do it.
    2) I have never been left hanging by an ESTp you will always get a response to a statement or a question in my experience
    3) I reckon if your blouse was unbuttoned an ESTp would be the first to notice
    Not sure if this is Se or just ESTps in general. Over time my anxiety is reduced as this pattern of behaviour is reinforced, I feel safe that everything will be ok if the ESTp is there. It then extends to situations where ESTp is not involved as your confidence starts to build.
    awww. This is more or less what I was talking about... like, it's okay to just give it a shot and roll with what comes of it. When it doesn't go well, as long as you can just laugh it off, everything's fine. Sometimes I purposely make an ass out of myself around shy people specifically to demonstrate that it really doesn't matter, that we don't need to take ourselves so seriously. It's like... self-deprecating humor, except I'm laughing with myself, not at myself, if that makes any sense. To try and fail is a glorious thing. I can sorta sense who and how I can playfully push or pull, and how much. Once you get someone laughing or at least smiling they tend to get more interactive. (More Ovaltine... I mean... Fe, please!) It doesn't take much effort with most people though, just let em know that you appreciate it when they offer their input.

    Blouse unbuttoned... heh. There are so many awesome things that could be said in a situation like that... but yeah, I'd definitely say something.
    SEE

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    Worst thing that can happen to an undualized IEIs is definetely an aphtosis .
    Additionaly, the overall problems with lacking roots in real life. You know-
    Difficulty in finding a job, becouse of their choosy and lazy nature, and in result
    being dependent financially to others.
    Social problems associated with going to an office or settling important matters.
    IEIs are often up for a drink (especially if somebody else pay for it ) and will be sociable rather in that way.
    If it goes about me- everything above and worrying unduly about things i screwed up in the past.
    Last edited by Oregano; 11-27-2011 at 08:00 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa33 View Post
    Not every Delta watches disney movies
    A straw man. There is a correlation. Say anything else and you'll be a liar.

    Quote Originally Posted by dinki View Post
    This only happens to me with new people and hot SLE guys haha. Hate.
    I just came here to say that there's nothing cuter than situational IEI insecurity.
    “I tell you, freedom and human rights in America are doomed. The U.S. government will lead the American people in — and the West in general — into an unbearable hell and a choking life. - Osama bin Laden

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