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Thread: ESFj elaboration, please

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    Default ESFj elaboration, please

    I'm trying to figure out this type, as I don't have a clear image of this type yet. I am remembering one person in particular who I feel may be an ESFj from my past, but, believe it or not, I never spent time with this person. It was always obeservation from a distance - uncommon for sure for someone like me, whilst in high school. (.....)

    Now, I read somewhere that "Monica" from the "Friends" TV show is an example of an ESFj - is that so? Any good representations of this personality type are welcome.

    One thing I'd like clarified is this:
    5. Adherent of order. He loves to dress up and takes good care of his appearance. He can't tolerate any disorder or uncertainty in everything from his appearance to his garage and cubbyhole. He does not wish to adapt to the tastes of others. Compliments on his appearance are in vain - he believes he knows better how he looks. He takes not of not just spiritual qualities of his partner, but physical as well.
    http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.1.types/index-type.html

    Is that a phrase that I don't know, or is it a typo? In general, what does that last sentance mean?


    Thanks
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    I think it's supposed to say

    He takes note of not just spiritual qualities of his partner, but physical as well.
    I would guess that by "takes note of" it might mean "takes care of" or "notices and often feels compelled to comment on." My mom is ESFj, and she definitely does that with my INTj dad. ("Tuck that shirt in!" "Your buttons are coming undone." "Are you feeling all right? You look pale." etc.)

    Edit: She does that with everyone in our family, it's just that some of us (well, me ) are more likely to dispute her suggestions.
    NiTe | Socionix

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    i dont think the character "monica" is a good representation. other than telling you that ESE is like catnip, i can offer no other insights other than those already written. you will just have to make the correlations yourself.
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    ESFJs behave really curiously around an INTJ who shows a lot of confidence. You will get a definite sense that they are trying to "measure up" to you, and it's adorable how they try so hard not to look stupid. I can only wonder what's going on in their minds at times like those.

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    i love them ESE's so much! look how cute they are!
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
    ESFJs behave really curiously around an INTJ who shows a lot of confidence. You will get a definite sense that they are trying to "measure up" to you, and it's adorable how they try so hard not to look stupid. I can only wonder what's going on in their minds at times like those.
    Hmm, I think I might have encountered one here at college. She's in my chem class, and, of course, we're semi-lab partners, and I'm in an area where I look good.

    She reminds me of another peson I thought might be ESFj from Highschool, so it makes sense.
    She's taken, though, of course, by a guy who goes to West Point. I can ... 'respect' her traditionality, and I can see how she would be a good duality for me. But I suppose hoping her boyfriend to have an untimely death would be wrong......

    .................

    especially for an INTj .........

    *sigh* oh well.
    ESFjs are something else
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
    ESFJs behave really curiously around an INTJ who shows a lot of confidence. You will get a definite sense that they are trying to "measure up" to you, and it's adorable how they try so hard not to look stupid. I can only wonder what's going on in their minds at times like those.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
    ESFJs behave really curiously around an INTJ who shows a lot of confidence. You will get a definite sense that they are trying to "measure up" to you, and it's adorable how they try so hard not to look stupid. I can only wonder what's going on in their minds at times like those.
    Hmm, I think I might have encountered one here at college. She's in my chem class, and, of course, we're semi-lab partners, and I'm in an area where I look good.

    She reminds me of another peson I thought might be ESFj from Highschool, so it makes sense.
    She's taken, though, of course, by a guy who goes to West Point. I can ... 'respect' her traditionality, and I can see how she would be a good duality for me. But I suppose hoping her boyfriend to have an untimely death would be wrong......

    .................

    especially for an INTj .........

    *sigh* oh well.
    ESFjs are something else
    all you have to do is be with her as much as possible without getting physical. i promise that if she thinks that you are looking for a life partner she will drop the other guy. think mind meld. she just has to get around the whole "ethics" thing, and you have to get her there. if he is not an LII, there are things that he does that pisses her off. all you have to do is get her to think about it. and usually it is small things, like if he is a bad speller, or whatever. if you form a connection with her, she will be let down when she does meet with this other guy after a period. she will be confused, and unsure about leaving him. (it will be quite a sight). just make sure you are physically with her while she goes through this process.

    i love socionics
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mariano Rajoy
    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
    ESFJs behave really curiously around an INTJ who shows a lot of confidence. You will get a definite sense that they are trying to "measure up" to you, and it's adorable how they try so hard not to look stupid. I can only wonder what's going on in their minds at times like those.
    Hmm, I think I might have encountered one here at college. She's in my chem class, and, of course, we're semi-lab partners, and I'm in an area where I look good.

    She reminds me of another peson I thought might be ESFj from Highschool, so it makes sense.
    She's taken, though, of course, by a guy who goes to West Point. I can ... 'respect' her traditionality, and I can see how she would be a good duality for me. But I suppose hoping her boyfriend to have an untimely death would be wrong......

    .................

    especially for an INTj .........

    *sigh* oh well.
    ESFjs are something else
    all you have to do is be with her as much as possible without getting physical. i promise that if she thinks that you are looking for a life partner she will drop the other guy. think mind meld. she just has to get around the whole "ethics" thing, and you have to get her there. if he is not an LII, there are things that he does that pisses her off. all you have to do is get her to think about it. and usually it is small things, like if he is a bad speller, or whatever. if you form a connection with her, she will be let down when she does meet with this other guy after a period. she will be confused, and unsure about leaving him. (it will be quite a sight). just make sure you are physically with her while she goes through this process.

    i love socionics
    Wow.. what about for ESFps?

    I notice a "thing" when I go around them.

    What's the Mariano method for "courting" ESFps?
    thing.

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    When they say "wanna FUCK?!", actually listen to them


    ---------------

    I wonder about that ESFj stuff, though. I guess they are very much....... "who you spend time with". Out of all the people I think I see in the past as ESFj, that seems to be something in commen with them.

    I guess that would actually involve me insitgating somethings.

    .............. "Darcy".
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    When they say "wanna FUCK?!", actually listen to them
    Yeah really. ESFPs are really down to earth and they never "beat around the bush". They aren't the type to tease, either.

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    haha! mariano method!

    my method for courting ESFp's? DON'T. what the f-uck are you thinking? i made that mistake once. then i found socionics and am able to identify and avoid satan.

    for some reason, i continue to attract ESFp's. how do i let them know that i am not interested? by telling them that i am only interested in sex. that has worked so far. not too many will admit that is what they are looking for as well. so, if you want to attract an ESFp, do not tell them within the first few minutes that you are horny and need release.

    i think i continue to attract ESFp's because i am social and unafraid to talk about politics or whatever abstraction comes to mind. it isn't what you say, it is your delivery. it is 100% form and 0% content. and i smile a lot. then they approach me. can't explain it really, the whole opposite attraction thing. nothing to it. especially if you are INTp, i have seen you guys go berserk. you guys just need to drink some tequila. work yourself up somehow, find your power animal or something.

    oh, and rick's site had some pointers that helped me "perfect my method" and realize mistakes i had made in the past. it is tricky being introverted and male and staying within the "zone of responsibility" while trying to attract an ESFj.
    http://www.socionics.us/practice/duality.shtml
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    6w5 sx
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    sloan - rcuei

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    Rick's site has a pretty cool article. Looking back, that makes sense, and applying that concept to other situations, it makes a lot of sense.


    I "initiated" an ESFj (I think, but I'm not certain yet) and INTj study get together tonight, so we'll see how it goes. She's defintitely Exxj. Probably S. She shes not an idiot, though she can be somewhat ditzy. So maybe an F. Oh well --- I don't want to make too much of this. that sort of thing is bad enough as it is. I hope my 'forwardness' with initiating a study session wasn't too "OOC", but she did come up with the idea before.

    She's pretty, too
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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    nice. keep us posted. remember its a marathon, play the long game. and dont forget to keep looking.
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    i met what seems like an ESFj off the net (i travelled to meet her) and she explicitly said on our date that "i feel like i've known you for 15 years" and it appears that "we" have something albeit in the early stages. The choice of a new female companion seems to rest in my hands.
    Remember to keep things simple and not any simpler like Einstein once said.

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    where did you meet her? and how did you know she was ESE?
    LII
    that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.

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    She appeared to me as an ESE for the following reasons:

    She seemed more extraverted i.e. talkative; she seemed to notice quickly that i appeared more intelligent to her; i usually assume that most girls are ethical (F) types; she seemed like a rational (j) type because she and I alike seemed to be conscious of the time; in her company we had periods of what seemed like (comfortable) silence and she seemed to accept it as "normal"; it seemed to go quite effort-less; we never seemed to upset each other in any way;
    Remember to keep things simple and not any simpler like Einstein once said.

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    ILI is suggestive to powerful desires (willpower) and drives to do or obtain something no matter what. He/she cannot create this state of mind himself, but if you do it for him, he gets drawn into the thick of exciting events in the outside world in a way that totally rejuvenates him and balances him out.
    http://www.socionics.us/practice/typ...risons.shtml#1

    This has nothing to do with anything other than myself, but I just had a major experience of this sort today. The outside event was my chem test. I feel renewed having taken it, and I was washing out a bottle for a lab later today and I remembered seeing this yesterday, when I explored the link.

    That is very fitting. I cannot seem to create that state of mind, only preserve it sometimes. But when it does happen, it's invigorating.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

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