Fi creative

[thePirate]

Fi creatives, how do you use your 2nd function? describe it

how do you other members perceive its use? how do Fi creatives get people to like them? how do they manage relationships? what are the subtleties in their control? etc etc.

put as much info as possible

[stanprollyright]

I generally stay friends with everyone, participate in small talk, wave to people, etc. Little gestures. I like every relationship, however small, to have something personal between us, so a little inside joke or shared experience can go a long way. I try to develop these and find common ground with everyone. I like to be as open and sincere as possible, generally keeping any and all negativism to myself around people I don't know well, giving compliments when they are due, and any criticism is constructive and carefully phrased. I dislike burning bridges, because I never know when I might need to call on that person or if sometime in the future I might end up in close association with them again. I make time for people I like but for people I'm less excited to see I'm really busy and have no time to spare. I consciously categorize friendships in tiers: best friends, good friends, friends, acquaintances. When I call people to hang out I go straight down the list, starting with my best friend/roommate/sidekick (JWC3), then the rest of the best friends category, and sometimes reaching into the good friends for a little variety. At parties or other large gatherings of people I mingle with lots of people, having conversations with individuals and small groups. If a conversation drops into awkward silence I acknowledge that I have nothing else to say and then leave, or mention that there is an awkward silence an average of every seven minutes (which usually resparks conversation). I like to listen to people talk about themselves and their experiences, and I'm usually genuinely interested in what people have to say. If not I make some excuse to leave.

[Suz]

Fi creatives, how do you use your 2nd function? describe it

how do you other members perceive its use? how do Fi creatives get people to like them? how do they manage relationships? what are the subtleties in their control? etc etc.

put as much info as possible

Yeah pretty much what stanprollyright said--that would be Fi on the positive end of things. Also, the need for people focus in any activity/career path I am most interested in doing. If there isn't an obvious people focus in a task, doing it will be of immense tedium to me unless I make it people focused for myself. For example, a graduation talk I had to give to an audience full of my peers and teachers. It was a topic of great importance but very dry and borin, and at first it was TORTURE trying to prepare for it. However, when I made the mission of my talk to deliver a take home message to my peers about the importance of making sure they get such and such done for their own protection, the assignment became an exhilirating, meaningful act of service to me and after that had great fun working on it and delivering it.

I am also pretty good at recognizing peoples' emotional states when I am not in Ne-land, and I have to say a big strength of mine is knowing how to write/say something in a diplomatic yet effective way when I need to get something done, make amends, or :redface:confess my feelings. . .
Not sure if this is from Fi or Fe though. I'd think since it's between individuals it would be Fi. And some of that could also be Ne working with Fi.

On the bad side, creative Fi I think manifests in me as often taking things more personally than I should have. Also being emotionally turbulent on the inside (though not always making it obvious on the outside), suffering greatly from emotion, unable to separate thinking from emotions too well (e.g. can't concentrate on an exam if something is bothering me emotionally). Apt to fall in love too quickly and forget about feelings too slowly. The perpetual want to have an object of affection (even when I was a little preschool kid), and constantly on the search for one (even though not always finding one).

Not sure how primary Fi would differ wrt all this. would be interesting to hear.

I generally stay friends with everyone, participate in small talk, wave to people, etc. Little gestures. I like every relationship, however small, to have something personal between us, so a little inside joke or shared experience can go a long way. I try to develop these and find common ground with everyone. I like to be as open and sincere as possible, generally keeping any and all negativism to myself around people I don't know well, giving compliments when they are due, and any criticism is constructive and carefully phrased. I dislike burning bridges, because I never know when I might need to call on that person or if sometime in the future I might end up in close association with them again. I make time for people I like but for people I'm less excited to see I'm really busy and have no time to spare. I consciously categorize friendships in tiers: best friends, good friends, friends, acquaintances. When I call people to hang out I go straight down the list, starting with my best friend/roommate/sidekick (JWC3), then the rest of the best friends category, and sometimes reaching into the good friends for a little variety. At parties or other large gatherings of people I mingle with lots of people, having conversations with individuals and small groups. If a conversation drops into awkward silence I acknowledge that I have nothing else to say and then leave, or mention that there is an awkward silence an average of every seven minutes (which usually resparks conversation). I like to listen to people talk about themselves and their experiences, and I'm usually genuinely interested in what people have to say. If not I make some excuse to leave.

Ditto to everything you said. I love the part in bold! Will borrow that for my own use if u dont mind. . . I personally am comfortable with silence, but then I start thinking the other person may not be and then I feel awkward. So I will say what you said!

[redbaron]

I know a woman who is either SEE or IEE. She doesn't like me, although I feel like she used to like me, and I couldn't figure out why the change. Until one day I heard her talking about a couple of years ago when her daughter died--she was saying how during times like those you know who your real friends are and how lots of people came to the funeral (myself included) but that it was only those people who continued checking up on her and asking how she was, months and years after that, who were her "real" friends.

Well, sheesh! First of all, I didn't know her that well to start with. Before her daughter died, we were in the very beginnings of a friendship. When someone loses a loved one, is everyone expected to mourn this loss for the rest of their lives? I mean, it's this expectation that FRIENDS are SUPPOSED to do this or that OR ELSE they're not friends. It's a huge turn-off and although I'm very sorry for her loss, the fact that we weren't what I consider to be BEST friends, kind of absolves me from hanging out at her house every day and calling her every other week to be sure she's okay.

I feel like Fi creatives just expect a LOT from their relationships. Not only this person, but I know about four other SEEs and several IEEs including my mother and it gets pretty tiring to try to live up to their expectations. Makes me want to run the other way! I know that when I'm going through something difficult, I certainly don't expect everyone to "pay up" or whatever. nobody owes me anything and I don't want anything that's not given freely and without obligation.

[Lobo]

I know a woman who is either SEE or IEE. She doesn't like me, although I feel like she used to like me, and I couldn't figure out why the change. Until one day I heard her talking about a couple of years ago when her daughter died--she was saying how during times like those you know who your real friends are and how lots of people came to the funeral (myself included) but that it was only those people who continued checking up on her and asking how she was, months and years after that, who were her "real" friends.

Well, sheesh! First of all, I didn't know her that well to start with. Before her daughter died, we were in the very beginnings of a friendship. When someone loses a loved one, is everyone expected to mourn this loss for the rest of their lives? I mean, it's this expectation that FRIENDS are SUPPOSED to do this or that OR ELSE they're not friends. It's a huge turn-off and although I'm very sorry for her loss, the fact that we weren't what I consider to be BEST friends, kind of absolves me from hanging out at her house every day and calling her every other week to be sure she's okay.

I feel like Fi creatives just expect a LOT from their relationships. Not only this person, but I know about four other SEEs and several IEEs including my mother and it gets pretty tiring to try to live up to their expectations. Makes me want to run the other way! I know that when I'm going through something difficult, I certainly don't expect everyone to "pay up" or whatever. nobody owes me anything and I don't want anything that's not given freely and without obligation.

I think this could apply to Fi leading types as well. It's not having enough facts to assess who your "real" friends are, or not accepting that a "real friend" doesn't even exist without defining your own conditions, and then relying on some kind of "rule of thumb" or belief system to fill in the gaps. Unfortunately, Fi systems are only as good as the information being provided. However, I do think Fi types are capable of re-evaluating their beliefs if given more information or a side to whatever happened, but of course, it's not their prerogative.

It sucks when you are trying to live up to someone's expectation and you feel like you can never reach it :/.

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[krieger]

Is fear of authority a Ti-PoLR trait? Abhorring the notion of having someone tell you what's what on the basis of an informed opinion as opposed to concrete evidence?

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[krieger]

What English word would you use to capture "Ti" with? Is there a single word that can?

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[krieger]

Unsatisfactory.

[Slacker]

Something relevant just came up in a conversation earlier. I get a lot of migraine headaches. A LOT. It's a huge problem for me. So, I was catchign up on housework today as it's a good day, and then I took the baby out for a walk, and ran into a neighbor. I told her I'd been catching up on housework after a headache, and she said, "Oh, that must be your first priority." And said, "Well, it's something that has to get done." But after we talked I thought about it and really my first priority is making sure I spend time with my kids and husband, that they get some of the healthier time with me, and that it's really important to prioritize keeping those relationships healthy when they have to put up with me feeling bad so often.

That's one example. I also use Facebook to keep relationships going with people I'm not as close to as my immediate family. Knowing what they're doing and commenting on it helps to keep us from falling apart. I'm not able to get out as much as I'd like between the headaches and the kids, so that's another way of doing the same thing.

[Cyrano]

Something relevant just came up in a conversation earlier. I get a lot of migraine headaches. A LOT. It's a huge problem for me. So, I was catchign up on housework today as it's a good day, and then I took the baby out for a walk, and ran into a neighbor. I told her I'd been catching up on housework after a headache, and she said, "Oh, that must be your first priority." And said, "Well, it's something that has to get done." But after we talked I thought about it and really my first priority is making sure I spend time with my kids and husband, that they get some of the healthier time with me, and that it's really important to prioritize keeping those relationships healthy when they have to put up with me feeling bad so often.

That's one example. I also use Facebook to keep relationships going with people I'm not as close to as my immediate family. Knowing what they're doing and commenting on it helps to keep us from falling apart. I'm not able to get out as much as I'd like between the headaches and the kids, so that's another way of doing the same thing.

Tell SlackerDad I said to get off his duff and help out! :wink:

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[consentingadult]

What English word would you use to capture "Ti" with? Is there a single word that can?

Systems (the scientific meaning of the word).

[xerx]

Is fear of authority a Ti-PoLR trait? Abhorring the notion of having someone tell you what's what on the basis of an informed opinion as opposed to concrete evidence?

Just fear of authority they don't have and/or have an impersonal relationship with.

[consentingadult]

Just fear of authority they don't have and/or have an impersonal relationship with.

Imo, 'fear' is not the right word, I'd prefer 'blindness'.

[xerx]

Imo, 'fear' is not the right word, I'd prefer 'blindness'.

What does that mean?

[Creepy-Cyclops]

How about trying to find one word like some of you guys are doing to sum up a vast complex, that's pointless and impractical, that's Ti.

[consentingadult]

What does that mean?

Ti-PoLRs are oblivious to Ti things. When they go about their business, 'authorities' are simply not in their mind. It is only when they get in close contact with authorities (if these employ Ti-style attitudes towards them) that they might get into conflict and become stressed. Fear might be there, but more likely with authorities they do have a relationship with, either personal or impersonal. But of course, not all authorities employ Ti-style attitudes.

[Blaze]

What English word would you use to capture "Ti" with? Is there a single word that can?

classifications.