Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: Healing

  1. #1
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Healing

    have you ever used socionics to help you heal a relationship? if so, how? i'm thinking of important, close relationships or even work relationships (due to the closer distance at work and political pressure) more than casual friendships.

    i had a healing conversation with my mom and dad. they are my benefactor and supervisor, respectively. i labelled the supervision without mentioning anything about socionics directly. my father really loves me...and now knows there is almost nothing he can tell me that will help me the way he thinks i need to be helped.

    i talked about our quadra differences without talking about socionics directly. delta values: they value a Camelot lifestyle, focused on civilization, accumulation of property, buildings, wealth. as an alpha, i prefer a life style of simplicity, enjoyment, space and time to consider ideas and inventions, and some emotional drama. alphas are the hippies not delta. i talked about how some of our values are the same....others are not. that, finally, i can't be like them although i can admire their lifestyle and see why they like it. it's so tough for them to really try to let me go, but i think after all this time they finally are ready. they are ready after a protracted period of distance, after struggling with the loss of a different alpha child to a life of simplicity in costa rica, only in this emotional turmoil were they ready to consider the gestalt of what's happening to our family.

    i guess it's tough for delta parents to accept the wanderings of alpha children. i would say it went well. i am feeling more hopeful than ever before!

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    1,276
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm glad that you were able to do that. I'm sure that was a really, really hard conversation to have.

    Haven't used socionics like that. I don't think I'd ever be able to explain anything clearly enough for people to get what I'm saying.
    Last edited by tiny_dancer; 03-03-2010 at 03:44 AM.
    IEE

  3. #3
    redbaron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    9,321
    Mentioned
    16 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by tiny_dancer View Post
    I don't think I'd ever be able to explain anything clearly enough for people to get what I'm saying.
    I feel the same way although I've tried to communicate some of the concepts in "regular" language. I'm not sure how understandable I was though.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

  4. #4
    EffyCold thePirate's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    TIM
    ??
    Posts
    1,897
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Blaze View Post

    i guess it's tough for delta parents to accept the wanderings of alpha children. i would say it went well. i am feeling more hopeful than ever before!
    lol you think thats tough?

    <--beta with delta parent.
    <Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" is and not

  5. #5
    Currently God Brilliand's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Nevada
    TIM
    LII
    Posts
    4,246
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by thePirate View Post
    <--beta with delta parent.
    One or two Delta parents? If one, what's the other one?



    LII-Ne

    "Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and the Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare!"
    - Blair Houghton

    Johari

  6. #6
    Haikus
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    MI
    TIM
    IEI-Ni
    Posts
    10,060
    Mentioned
    223 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    Yes but not directly. People are too pigheaded like the poster above me said. However, if you craftfully use a person's dual-seeking function, watch how they suddenly advocate for you and end up being on your side. It really does work. I can make my dad love me really easily with just a little concentrated effort. You can't be too obvious with it, show don't tell.

    I have no doubt in my mind that the 'elite' and people in power over everybody already understand socionics very well, and can basically feed a diluted version of everybody's DS function when they read them. To think the governments of the world don't know what this is about or write it off as childsplay is really naive imo.

  7. #7
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Blaze View Post
    have you ever used socionics to help you heal a relationship?
    yes, I ran away from my ESE girlfriend.

  8. #8
    EffyCold thePirate's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    TIM
    ??
    Posts
    1,897
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Brilliand View Post
    One or two Delta parents? If one, what's the other one?
    mirror
    <Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" is and not

  9. #9
    wants to be a writer. silverchris9's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    3,107
    Mentioned
    14 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Nope, never done this. I have maybe used socionics to reinforce decisions I might've made anyway about what style of behavior will be most effective with certain people (both positive and negative--I've purposely used Fe to annoy Fe superegos before, but I often simulate Fi or Ne to get along with people from other quadras, usually deltas), but I've never used socionics to this extent and in this way, explaining concepts without using their socionics names, etc. I might try it sometime though.

    Congrats on getting to a better understanding with your parents though. That must be really nice.

    lol you think thats tough?

    <--beta with delta parent.
    2/3, baby, if you count the stepmother. My dad's LII though. Surprisingly, I got along better with mom than my dad when I was really little, but that was probably not socionics related, unless my mom is actually EIE, which I don't think she is (but maybe). Which parent is the EIE?
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

    I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.

  10. #10
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    thank you everyone for your comments. been wanting to follow up with this thread. socionically, here's what i accomplished:

    1. sorted out the supervision problem with my father and empowered him to stop "helping"
    2. defined differences between alpha and delta values, their expression, and their overlap
    3. interpreted the "waywardness" of my LII brother who has permanently relocated to costa rica as beneficial to the entire family
    4. helped my parents look at the seeds they planted in a different way.
    5. helped them understand the changed world of a divorced single mom

    my convo with my father went something like this:

    "dad, i am attracted to you because you are a sympathetic and understanding person. you have strengths that i don't have. everywhere, you see relationships quite clearly. who likes who, who hates who, who gets along, who doesn't get along, who's up to no good, and who cannot be trusted. you also see a lot of creative options for interacting with people.

    "i can't see that information at all, or at least only in a really limited way compared to you. you try to help me understand it out of love and concern, but since i don't see what you see, i can't make any use of what you tell me. so, even though are right about what you tell me, i feel all laid out and wide open when you help....since your help feels like criticism. so i relaliate because i feel like i have to defend my self.

    the people who are able to help me better with the things you want to help me with are X, Y, and Z people. somehow i can understand what they tell me a lot better. i know that you love me and i love you, but certain kinds of help works better for me when it comes from X, Y, or Z person."

    quadra value discussion to follow. (out of time at the moment)

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •