Alpha hot LIIbrarian pageant

[Creepy-male]

In memory of Warrior-Librarian, wherever she now roams :frown:

Because I don't think LIIs get nearly enough attention. And please note you don't need to be involved with a LIIbrary in any way, you just have to be LII. Open entry! This thread is an opportunity to show off and be silly. And compete viciously, violently, and with vitriol for the affection, adoration and adulations of the cramped and clamouring crowd!

Current stage: making categories, considering foundations (is this pure silliness? Or an actual contest? Who should judge? Who should score? etc). Anyone can contribute.

Categories:

Pick-up lines

Got some nerdy or creative pick-up line? Flaunt it! Nerdiness and creativity will be rewarded.

Sub-category: getting a number. Again, nerdiness and creativity will be rewarded. Something like, "I need a seed for my pseudorandom number generator, care to contribute with your number?"

Awkwardness and cheesiness will not be punished. Does not need to actually have any hope of working IRL.

I Don't Need To Be Hot

I've got ________.

Unique talent? Cool contribution? Lucky item? Or maybe you really are just hot?

Mortal Combat

LIIs are renowned fighters of truth and justice. What superpowers or distinguishing chracteristics would you have? Arch-nemesis? How are you all dressed? What are you fighting?

[Kalinoche buenanoche]

"I need a seed for my pseudorandom number generator, care to contribute with your number?"

isn't this kind of an ILE line?

[717495]

Seeing as though it was written by an ILE, yes.

[MatthewZ]

Fighter for Truth and Justice? Nonsense. I strive to create a world united under my banner of the order and obedience needed to survive in a world rapidly depleting of resources. Arch Archon Matthew, Lord and Savior of the New World Order. The world will run, but only with I as its sole architect and pilot.

[Creepy-male]

Seeing as though it was written by an ILE, yes.

Lifted from New Scientist, actually.

[Brilliand]

Purpose: to act LII. Which aspects to display? Probably not Introversion; that defeats the purpose of a thread. All Alpha functions, it seems, according to the values and what levels of competence can be reasonably expected of an LII. Problem...

...we still don't have a goal.

Accounting for that, then, rhubarb makes great salad dressing. Awarding points would serve no purpose; rambling incoherently would meet some requirements of the OP, but not its spirit.

Who in their right mind tries to hold a celebration attending only be LIIs?

[Krig the Viking]

I don't need to be hot. I've got an air conditioner.

[MatthewZ]

Oh, don't worry, natural selection will figure things out for the LII conundrum. There's enough of us for selection.

Now does anyone know where to find ESE mates?

[electric sheep]

I am declaring MatthewZ my arch nemesis. I will not rest until I have defeated him.

Try the local chess club Matt, or maybe the comic book shop. I hear they're crawling with ESEs who would love to hear a lecture on truth, justice and the American way.

I don't need to be hot because... oh wait, I am hot. :redface:

[MatthewZ]

That's going to be a problem for it is I that shall defeat YOU!

[Creepy-male]

I don't need to be hot because... oh wait, I am hot. :redface:

I knew you'd choose to answer like that.

[Reuben]

39.5 degrees centigrade is usually considered hot by most people under normal circumstances, particularly those that do not involve pathogenic infiltrations to respiratory organs, a common cause of non-persistent fever.

[Creepy-Pied Piper]

Removed at User Request

[discojoe]

[electric sheep]

That... is... AWESOME!!!

[The Exception]

In memory of Warrior-Librarian, wherever she now roams :frown:

Because I don't think LIIs get nearly enough attention. And please note you don't need to be involved with a LIIbrary in any way, you just have to be LII. Open entry! This thread is an opportunity to show off and be silly. And compete viciously, violently, and with vitriol for the affection, adoration and adulations of the cramped and clamouring crowd!

Current stage: making categories, considering foundations (is this pure silliness? Or an actual contest? Who should judge? Who should score? etc). Anyone can contribute.

Categories:

Pick-up lines

Got some nerdy or creative pick-up line? Flaunt it! Nerdiness and creativity will be rewarded.

Sub-category: getting a number. Again, nerdiness and creativity will be rewarded. Something like, "I need a seed for my pseudorandom number generator, care to contribute with your number?"

Awkwardness and cheesiness will not be punished. Does not need to actually have any hope of working IRL.

I Don't Need To Be Hot

I've got ________.

Unique talent? Cool contribution? Lucky item? Or maybe you really are just hot?

Mortal Combat

LIIs are renowned fighters of truth and justice. What superpowers or distinguishing chracteristics would you have? Arch-nemesis? How are you all dressed? What are you fighting?

[Daegon Xzing]

Personally, I fight against the true evil in the galaxy: ketchup. Vile stuff! It smells and tastes worse than guano dunked in elephant lard, rolled through my underwear drawer, sprinkled with diced sparrow intestines, and then swallowed and vomited a few times. Believe me, I know!

My Grandma was only 67 years old when her life was claimed by ketchup poisoning. Now every full moon her entire cemetery comes back to life in the form of ketchup zombies who rampage the town and force themselves down people's throats to infect new ketchup zombies. It's my job to stop them before the whole world becomes ketchup.

Fortunately, I have protection: my spandex superhero suit is ketchup proof. I'd encourage you all to buy your own anti-ketchup suit from my store on eBay. You never know when ketchup might be lying in wait for you around the corner. Or lurking beneath your bed sheets, only to jump out at you during the night. Usually you can smell it a mile away, but if you have a cold ... well, best be prepared!