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Thread: Emotional side and expression of ILIs-INTps

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    . willekeurig's Avatar
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    I have an ILI friend who says "aww" and sometimes even smiles when he's drunk. not very often though.
    Last edited by willekeurig; 11-05-2012 at 09:34 AM.
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    you can go to where your heart is Galen's Avatar
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    My experience with ILIs and their emotionality is quite varied. I've known the more commonly-conceived stoic type who barely express anything other than the occasional chuckle at somebody doing something really stupid, but there's also the more socially aware kind that's much more comfortable interacting with people on a deeper interpersonal level. I guess the latter wouldn't really come off as more "emotional" per se than somewhat more inflectional and engaging.

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    Éminence grise mikemex's Avatar
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    ILIs are quite emotional. Perhaps not so much when they are alone but in social situations it can be quite obvious if you know where to look at. The mom of a friend of mine is ILI and she's like the head of an extended family; she's got a dark sense of humor and loves making everyone to laugh, although she tries to keep a poker face. She loves having the family having good time together.

    ILIs are observers, as if they were recording life behind a glass. I spotted one in a museum recently that I visit from time to time with female friends. I'm sure she recalled me from the first time I was there and got shocked when I showed up alone with another woman. I guess she must have thought I was dating them or something, LOL. She thought I wasn't paying attention to her but I was and I noticed it.
    [] | NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)

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    Really depends on life phase and maturity. And, I'm going to get shot and stabbed, but also enneagram. My best friend is a 2w1 ILI and he's a good deal more emotionally expressive than any 5w4/5w6 ILI I've ever met. But there's always a certain self-consciousness to it past what seems to exist with other types. ILIs also seem to have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy when it comes to their feelings. They won't naturally shower you with their emotions unless you manage to piss them off pretty badly on a regular basis, but the more you let them trust you, the more open they are, and then their emotionality truly makes itself known.

    Eta: Call attention to this when you're with the ILI and you're bound to get burned, though.
    Last edited by Ningyo; 10-08-2012 at 08:24 AM.
    Probably ILI, or IE I/EIE/EII. PM me if you have ideas about my type! Ennagram 2w3 7w8 1w9.

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    2w1 ILIs don´t exist.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    2w1 ILIs don´t exist.
    Oh stfu.
    Probably ILI, or IE I/EIE/EII. PM me if you have ideas about my type! Ennagram 2w3 7w8 1w9.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ningyo View Post
    Oh stfu.
    He isn't wrong these terms are antithesis.

    I've spent many a day talking with 'ILI's' believe me, most of them are anything but. There are at least 3 people who are on this forum who used to self type ILI; their perspective changed once they understood what they were discussing.

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    No, they definitely don´t exist. The description of an E-type 2 completely contradicts every ILI description.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by InvisibleJim View Post
    Do you have any experience of the ILIs around you being emotionally expressive; or not so much, or barely at all?

    Can you elaborate into the particulars of the situation?
    ILIs are so emotional my bleak existence comes to an end simply by talking about it.

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    2w1 ILIs don´t exist.
    They do. Just look at Maritsa.

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    After a lot of alcohol the other week my ILI friend ran up to me with a flying hug, yelling my name. It was unexpected to say the least. Typically he has to be drunk and often in elaborate fancy dress to express any emotion. Sometimes he will exaggerate his traits of emotional constipation and pedanticism as a way of causing mirth in others. It is subtle and done dryly however.

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    I always found this somewhat useful:


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    c esi-se 6w7 spsx ashlesha's Avatar
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    ive only typed one ili irl and the only way i can think to describe his level of emotional expression is "normal."

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    The Soul Happy-er JWC3's Avatar
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    I tend to view ILIs as plenty expressive. Not just amount but optimally expressive in a way. The way I sort of think about it is I'm very good at telling how people feel. Unnaturally good at it even. In fact you could liken my ability to glean personal information about the emotional worlds of others to a super power. A lot like super hearing. However the thing is life isn't a comic book, and if you have super hearing in real life, it's not so super really everyone just sounds like their shouting directly into your eardrum all the time. When I interact with ILIs I generally think to myself "You know, you speak at the perfect level. Plus since you're not shouting I can really appreciate those melodious tones, you really have a beautiful voice, did you know that? Lets make babies."


    Disclaimer: The metaphor above does fall apart a bit in that I really don't think that the emotional expression of ILIs is subdued or quieter or in anyway less obvious or less apparent than that of any socionics type. Though most ILIs I've met and socionics both sort of support such a conclusion. I really don't mean to imply that ILIs feel or express any emotion any different than some ideological "real" person would. To me ILI expression is just a different beast entirely, but different people are still different people and what's true of one ILI may not be true of the others. I just really like that metaphor because I have super powers and live in a world littered with the sexy voices of various ILIs. Also I haven't been sleeping and am not feeling very serious at the moment.
    Last edited by JWC3; 10-13-2012 at 07:05 PM.
    Easy Day

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    ILIs keep all their emotion in the eyebrows. Just ask maritsa.






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    Quote Originally Posted by k0rpsy View Post
    I'm having a beer right now, not an emotion.
    No you don't, not anymore. It's an emotion now.

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    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    ILIs keep all their emotion in the eyebrows. Just ask maritsa.
    I'm ILI, confirmed.

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    c esi-se 6w7 spsx ashlesha's Avatar
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    in light of the individualism thread being full of emotional appeals and projections along with pictures and emoticons and catch phrases being used in lieu of substantive points, this thread is pretty ironic.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lungs View Post
    in light of the individualism thread being full of emotional appeals and projections along with pictures and emoticons and catch phrases being used in lieu of substantive points, this thread is pretty ironic.
    Put a tampon in it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by InvisibleJim View Post
    Put a tampon in it.

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    what defines being emotionally expressive?
    is it possible an ethical type can "see through" an ILI and thus conclude them as being emotionally expressive when they're not conscious of being so?
    do people always do what emotional state they're in? if not, how then do we answer your question? =\
    INTp
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    A dusty and dreadful charade. Scapegrace's Avatar
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    Being good at parroting Natalie Imbruglia's facial expressions in this video:

    "[Scapegrace,] I don't know how anyone can stand such a sinister and mean individual as you." - Maritsa Darmandzhyan

    Brought to you by socionix.com

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    Fe base people often find me lacking in emotional expressiveness.

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    Staunch opposition to the vitiating evils of altruism prevent my describing minutiae of the ILI experience for the benefit of confused Ti-doms.

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    Each function has at least one dimension, which is experience. If function is able to gain experience then it does it.
    As somebody above has already mention it - depends on age and maturity. Polr is able to learn, therefore young ILI is not the same as older ILI.

    I had many problems with showing emotions and accepting emotions when I was younger and the problem is not so crucial for me anymore, however I tend to show them rather in front of people I know better and I still don't like when anyone is expecting that from me.

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    The humans are dead.

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    As an Ili, emotional expression mostly confuses me. As the last conscious process in my mind ity is difficult to give it priority and often when huge amounts of fe being thrown arond it often comes across as annoying noise. In situations such as parties I am often shy about expressing myself, but under stress I am able to use my id functions and can actually be quite witty and jovial. If you can emotionally warm an Ili up, there is nothing stopping them from expressing themselves. Fe is not used as a tool, however, and skillful fe users can be quite imposing. Around Hugo I can eventually warm up, much more difficult around hamlet as he tends to make me feel overwhelmed as he emotionally runs laps around me. Fe is tough for me qnd I am mostly better off using ti to communicate with them.

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    boom boom boom blackburry's Avatar
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    LOL why did i not see the tampon licker before?


    I know two ILIs both are mild in their expressiveness. both become more so in the presence of their other friends. (so i think the issue is when they're around me).

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    "Information without energy is useless" Nowisthetime's Avatar
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    Slavoy Žižek is emotionally expressive in his own way. Maybe someone disagrees but I type him ILI.

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    Default Fe/Fi rant

    I find a lot of Fe types lack emotional expressiveness, that is, the automatic human kind (where you can merely look at someone and see their soul, and get a sympathetic response without it being ridden with some dependent occurrence.) Fe quadras instead seem like they have more of an on-off switch, ime, appropriating at any level to a given object while remaining dead the rest of the time. This can make them seem cold and hard to connect to, unless I can get over my lacking of socially "playing along" to where we can find some external connection in events. Instead I view my emotions as a continuous implicit stream, something you can always rely on, like the sun always coming up and moving west. This is how a number of xLIs are, even to where this implicit stream is highly emotive without any fine expressive qualities. I've witnessed it being annoying, brash and badly-played to EIEs and other merry types, almost like they're assuming we have some sort of mental illness and can't act "right." Sometimes Fi comes across like their PoLR, and it's an odd feeling that they lack something so essentially human, that they seem like robots with on-off switches activated by the events around them, unable to trigger the warm feeling always inside of them.

    edit: I have also come to learn that what a lot of Fe/Ti-ers consider "bad manners" are merely not being sociable or responding accordingly, which to me, seems overly fake and not a good judge of character (taking something like manners as serious as requiring sociability.) Bad manners to me would be insulting someone without a sarcastic tone (which is something I purposefully even do because I'm crazy .) Sometimes showing bad manners means you care more. I personally like to get a sense of someone's uniqueness and tend not to judge them, especially not as much as Fe/Ti drama queens. The illusion of Fi being judgemental stems from us being individuals not adhering to what everyone else wants, instead focusing on that special place unique to us. I accept that other people have their own special feelings. A lot of times I get type 4 and Fi confused, because they both seem essential to who I am and I can only understand typology subjectively, but I have come to understand that 4ness has more to do with understanding and accepting uniqueness than it does merely assuming it.
    Last edited by 717495; 12-29-2012 at 09:26 AM.

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    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nowisthetime View Post
    Slavoy Žižek is emotionally expressive in his own way. Maybe someone disagrees but I type him ILI.
    Zizek is one of my favorite modern comedians but from my vantage he's probably ILE.

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    "Information without energy is useless" Nowisthetime's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by k0rpsy View Post
    Zizek is one of my favorite modern comedians but from my vantage he's probably ILE.
    I'm kinda surprised at that typing, because I think he is very far from ILE. Yes, NT irrational, seems outgoing, but not much more in common. Everything he says is basically and he has a very characteristic coldness despite the excitement. Creative subtype.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nowisthetime View Post
    I'm kinda surprised at that typing, because I think he is very far from ILE. Yes, NT irrational, seems outgoing, but not much more in common. Everything he says is basically and he has a very characteristic coldness despite the excitement. Creative subtype.
    I didn't say you had to fuck him, I'm just saying Zizek isn't ILI.

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    Barely at all.

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    Strictly speaking, any action is coupled to an emotional expression, even if this expression is not directed to entertain or catch the attention of the group with an intentional constant maneuvering, which in my formed opinion is more characterictic of
    In my experience ILI shows emotionality even by poker facing, when you observe the details you can catch the inflection of voice, the changes of posture, etc which are representative of some emotional state in ILI. Emotional reactions common to be seen are either some sort of state of agitation, when the ILI mobilizes or is "in the zone" and also sudden burst of aggression, specially if the ILI doesn't canalize this through cynical jokes and comments.
    On another insightful comment, ILI could express any emotion in the emotional spectrum, but as soon as the ILI's metaconsciousness reveals this state the ILI tends to feel awkwardly caught up in the emotional state, specially when the state produces lots of visceral changes in the body. An example of this is when there is euphoria around, the ILI will most probably experience this euphoria as exhausting for the body and mind.
    Also usually ILI could be identified by their sudden responses, or emotional outbursts that they cannot control. I believe this to be to a suggestive which boost aggression as a way to canalize assertivity and impulsiveness. Maybe this is some sort of release valve that allows some of the energy that has been contained for too long, due to ILI's more common state of inertia, to relieve pressure. Also it seems pretty natural that the energy needs to keep flowing somehow (even if ILI's motivation may move them into not moving)....Like some sudden solar eruptions that are natural to certain cosmical objects (and beings).

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    My dad is ILI and it's almost never. I've never seen him shed one tear, not even when his mother died. He is calm, cool and collected for the most part. He has been angry a few times and that's it.
    The mind is restless and difficult to restrain, but it is subdued by practice

    -Krishna

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    I opened this thread because of a personal discussion. The logic is very simple, in SLI and ILI Fe in Model A is function 4, it is irritating and only used in irritation and it's all about emotional expression. In my view, you tend to catch SLI/ILIs using words which imply their emotional state, but very rarely referring to the underlying emotional state or indeed appearing emotional in person.

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    I seem robotic unless you attempt to take away my free will, then:

    The mind is restless and difficult to restrain, but it is subdued by practice

    -Krishna

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