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Thread: You should grow a pair

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    Default You should grow a pair.

    How do you respond to things like "don't be a baby" or "quit being a wimp" or "grow some balls"? And what's your type?

    Edit: This isn't meant as a dare to do something physically difficult or unwise. It's more of an encouragement to leave your pity party and be strong and do what you need to do in your life.
    Last edited by Joy; 12-09-2009 at 03:08 AM.
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    FIST TO THE FACE

    ENFP BABY WOO!!
    <Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" is and not

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    Sauron, The Great Enemy ArchonAlarion's Avatar
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    It depends on the context.

    Generally I don't like it, because it's irrelevant. If I am refusing to do something I usually have good reason. If I end up doing what the person says anyways, then it's likely it didnt need to be said in the first place. Often, such playful imperatives are meant in good fun, so I have no reason to over-react. If I really do feel uncomfortable performing the action, then I will quickly get furious.
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonAlarion View Post
    It depends on the context.

    Generally I don't like it, because it's irrelevant. If I am refusing to do something I usually have good reason. If I end up doing what the person says anyways, then it's likely it didnt need to be said in the first place. Often, such playful imperatives are meant in good fun, so I have no reason to over-react. If I really do feel uncomfortable performing the action, then I will quickly get furious.
    Eh. I didn't mean it as a dare. More like... quit feeling sorry for yourself and believe in your strength and do what needs to be done. You can do it!
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    Sauron, The Great Enemy ArchonAlarion's Avatar
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    Oh. Yeah that seems supportive and inspiring enough.

    I was imagining something like riding your bike down a flight of stairs.

    Hmm it's still contextual...
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    LOL

    I edited my initial post to reflect its intended meaning.
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    The Soul Happy-er JWC3's Avatar
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    I don't think any one has ever said that to me...

    If they did I prolly deserved it and would agree with them because I would have to do something extremely out of character for that comment to crop up.

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    when you see the booty Galen's Avatar
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    I generally just don't respond.

    delta NF
    Last edited by Galen; 12-09-2009 at 04:01 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by JWC3 View Post
    I don't think any one has ever said that to me...

    If they did I prolly deserved it and would agree with them because I would have to do something extremely out of character for that comment to crop up.

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    I wouldn't like it if someone said something like that to me, and would probably say "who the hell do you think you are?". I wouldn't really think that such a person had good intentions, but even if they did, I would probably see them as facile.
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    If it serves my ends to do so, then I will (but grudgingly).
    The saddest ESFj

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    It would depend on who said it. If it was some stranger or someone I dislike, I would not react well. But if it was someone I trust, who I know understands me and supports my goals, it would probably have its intended effect of jolting me out of my self-pity.

    If I wasn't feeling any self-pity at the time, I would probably just be confused.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    It's more of an encouragement to leave your pity party and be strong and do what you need to do in your life.
    "Grow a pair" attitude is useless. Good intentions, but completely useless. It can even be harmful if the person receiving the advice has dangerously low self-esteem.

    Proper way to motivate someone is by raising their self-efficacy.
    Self-efficacy defined

    That sound more like: "Do you remember when you did such and such, or when you handled this and that". You refocus the person on past victories, easy next steps. You don't motivate them by calling them a castrated newt.
    "What is love?"
    "The total absence of fear," said the Master.
    "What is it we fear?"
    "Love," said the Master.

    I chose Love

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    As a female I guess I feel somewhat differently about being told to grow a pair. I'm like, "You know what, you're right. I should totally have more balls than most people."

    One time an IEE told me to grow some hair on my balls. That was... sort of weird. But I laughed and stopped whining. And made a mental note to take an iron supplement before I go to that conference again next year. And bring a sweater.
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    wants to be a writer. silverchris9's Avatar
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    I dunno. The theory says I'd respond well, right?

    Really it would depend on who it was. If it was a person I trusted and I thought I deserved it/they were right, totally cool. If it was a person I didn't trust and I didn't think they had any business making that comment, I would be royally pissed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by silverchris9 View Post
    I dunno. The theory says I'd respond well, right?
    Not necessarily. The 6th function is one we want others to encourage us in, but the 5th function is one we pretty much just need others to do for us.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    How do you respond to things like "don't be a baby" or "quit being a wimp" or "grow some balls"? And what's your type?

    Edit: This isn't meant as a dare to do something physically difficult or unwise. It's more of an encouragement to leave your pity party and be strong and do what you need to do in your life.
    Hrm. I've never really had anything like that directed at me. Usually it's me throwing lines like that.

    But I'd rather someone tell me to stop being a bitch than say stuff like: "you'll be ok" or "everything will be alright" -- I'd definitely rather someone slapped me 'round the chops and told me to "stop whinging and do something about it"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wrong Way Ticket View Post
    Hrm. I've never really had anything like that directed at me. Usually it's me throwing lines like that.

    But I'd rather someone tell me to stop being a bitch than say stuff like: "you'll be ok" or "everything will be alright" -- I'd definitely rather someone slapped me 'round the chops and told me to "stop whinging and do something about it"
    You're a Beta/Gamma extrovert, I assume? Probably Se dominant?
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    Hold on... Neon Monk???
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    wants to be a writer. silverchris9's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Not necessarily. The 6th function is one we want others to encourage us in, but the 5th function is one we pretty much just need others to do for us.
    So then the answer to "you should grow a pair" is "actually I was kinda hoping you could employ yours on my behalf?"

    I can't imagine what life would be like if someone took care of the Se-ing for me. Then perhaps I could be a golden bird singing of what is past or passing or to come. Of course, Shakespeare took care of his own Se, I think, although he probably could've used a helper. (Not that WS is necessarily IEI).
    Not a rule, just a trend.

    IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.

    Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Hold on... Neon Monk???
    Yahuh!

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    Quote Originally Posted by silverchris9 View Post
    So then the answer to "you should grow a pair" is "actually I was kinda hoping you could employ yours on my behalf?"
    lol yes

    Quote Originally Posted by Wrong Way Ticket View Post
    Yahuh!
    Wow! Welcome back.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    Wow! Welcome back.
    Cheers. Funny you thought I was a beta/gamma extrovert.

    I'm not too sure of my "type" any more. I'll just stick with IEE for the time being.

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    Well, what little I remember includes Fi. Similar to that of an IEE, actually.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    How do you respond to things like "don't be a baby" or "quit being a wimp" or "grow some balls"? And what's your type?

    Edit: This isn't meant as a dare to do something physically difficult or unwise. It's more of an encouragement to leave your pity party and be strong and do what you need to do in your life.
    I honestly can't think of anyone who has said this to me or to other people, maybe it's an American thing, it also seems a bit more popular on the forum.

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    the thread name sounds gamma.

    i like put your big girl panties on better.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy View Post
    How do you respond to things like "don't be a baby" or "quit being a wimp" or "grow some balls"? And what's your type?

    Edit: This isn't meant as a dare to do something physically difficult or unwise. It's more of an encouragement to leave your pity party and be strong and do what you need to do in your life.
    I don't know about socionics but as far as MBTI/Kiersey is concerned, I'd say "Grow some balls" and "quit being a wimp" are statement used to embolden a person and put them up to something.... in that context it seems very Artisan, xSxP.

    I know its probably similar in socionics with minor differences.

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    I don't think Si dominants are likely to say that. Se ego types (and apparently my IEE friend) are the types most likely to say it.
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    I would probably think that person is a bitch, like Clint Eastwood.

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