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    Default Type this internal monologue

    I was in my shower pondering how I just about got a full 8 hours of sleep, and it’s time to start a trend and do that every night… to find the discipline to get my ass in bed on time.

    I was thinking how awake I felt, and that I was “ready to conquer the day.” And all I needed to do was not spend all morning in the shower because then I wouldn’t be on time. Time always gets away from me in the shower. The shower is a great thinking spot.

    Then I noticed it trying to climb up the back wall of the bathtub… the huge dark brown spider with giant things that the venom comes out of (what these things are called escapes me at present).

    I shrieked and got out of the bathtub at once so I could stare at it and think. I was safe, because it a) isn’t bent on biting humans (most spiders like to avoid humans) and b) was having a hard time moving up the slick walls of the bath tub.

    Normally I capture spiders and throw them outside. But I felt more afraid of this one than most, because it was so huge, and its dark brown color was unnerving. I thought that it was very possibly a brown recluse. I decided to kill it, and pondered which method I would go with while I still debated with myself if I should try to capture it instead.

    I went with the easiest method and turned the shower head to that setting where it unleashes a strong narrow beam of water. The added vibration from the water sent the spider into what my mind perceived as a panic. It began moving very quickly trying to get away from the vibration caused by the water hitting the tub surface.

    I said, “I’m sorry, but I have to kill you.” Then I pointed the water at it, hoping the force was strong enough to kill it on impact. I didn’t want it to suffer, but I didn’t want to move anywhere near it because it was too fast. After concentrating the beam on it, uncertain if it was alive or not, I washed it down the drain, feeling a mixture of remorse, relief, disgust, and concern that it wasn’t dead and would crawl back up the drain (actually it probably got caught in my hair in the drain).

    This is the second spider that looks like this I’ve seen in my apartment. The first was smaller, and I killed it as well because I don’t like the monochromatic dark brown look… it doesn’t look like the typical house spider. Now that I have seen two of them I am concerned. For I haven’t seen this type in my apartment in the summer before. Unfortunately my browsing of images of brown recluses on the web has made it even more likely in my mind that it was one.

    As I continued my shower trying to ward away images of it crawling up the drain and biting my foot in revenge, I began to think about reincarnation. Perhaps the spider was the reincarnation of someone I had known in a previous life (not that I know if I believe in such things, but I like to ponder them). How betrayed it may have felt knowing it had no intention to harm me, but I out of my fear and hatred for its form destroyed it in this merciless fashion. I was sorry I killed it. But logically I do not regret my action.

    I then mused over the tendency of humans to hate and fear that which they don’t understand and to seek its destruction. On some level I thought the spider might understand this. For if I were asleep and it got stuck in my clothing it would bite me repeatedly out of fear. And then I started thinking this is why I fear spiders so much. I associate them with the primal simple hatred and fear present in the back of the mind of all creatures. Simple creatures like spiders act on cold self-preservational instincts. Their world is cruel, cold, alien… I fear and hate them for what is in my own mind… deep beneath all the layers afforded me by my warm more feeling mammalian ancestry. Deep beneath that is the cold nature of what was before. It is still in me, as it is in that spider. And my refusal to accept this nature leads me to irrational fear and wanting to escape this inner nature that I do not like, while at the same time acting on it (as I did when I killed the spider) confirming its presence.

    Because I hate it for being merciless, for being willing to bite me out of its primal need to survive. Yet I did the exact same thing to it. And in this way we are the same... and it is not a sameness I would want.
    From someone I very much enjoy reading from, every sentence she writes makes so much sense to me.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    If this person thinks spiders are bad, they should go see a Tea Party gathering. Now THAT is cold and alien.

    Seems alpha NT.

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    Okay, 07490, you know your place.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg View Post
    Seems alpha NT.
    This is most likely written by someone with Se/NI as their ego/valued information element.

    I don't think she is an IEI either, maybe because of her age and wisdom, she has developed good super-id functions. IEI doesn't write like that.
    Last edited by 07490; 12-05-2009 at 11:33 AM.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    Okay, 07490, you know your place.
    what do you mean?
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    what do you mean?
    There's a possibility, one of the many, that the powerful wizard could be right.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    There's a possibility, one of the many, that the powerful wizard could be right.
    Oh, you mean the writer is a powerful wizard and he or she could be right?

    Anyway rereading her thoughts she is like the next messiah, I want to bow as low as I can to her. she has got the intention of life all figured out.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    Oh, you mean the writer is a powerful wizard and he or she could be right?
    Nope, was thinking about tcaudilllg.

    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    Anyway rereading her thoughts she is like the next messiah, I want to bow as low as I can to her. she has got the intention of life all figured out.
    Don't keep her waiting, then. Good luck

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    Don't keep her waiting, then. Good luck
    The messiah, the person who has found the truth, said she has absolutely no interest in meeting me.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    The messiah, the person who has found the truth, said she has absolutely no interest in meeting me.
    Bummer. Don't want to sound preachy and stuff, but that could be easily anticipated and the whole embarrassing situation avoided.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Absurd View Post
    Bummer. Don't want to sound preachy and stuff, but that could be easily anticipated and the whole embarrassing situation avoided.
    Well, I wasn't going to rape her, what is she afraid of?

    I am a virgin don't you know, I am more precious than her in that matter.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Some Si valuer.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    lol was it really that profound? Not sure on type, but if anything it seemed like Ti-superid musing on some more universal principle underlying a specific experience. I think IxFps tend to have a penchant for this general way of thinking, as they constantly track processes, but are simultaneously "looking" for a Ti-understanding of said things. So, within the context of Si or Ni evolution, sometimes a 'spark' will occur, and an attempt to crystallize the subjective impression into something more coherent and unchanging will ensue.

    I think if it were an alpha NT, there would be a much stronger systematic bent to the style, with less emphasis on the personal experience and tangential notions derived from said thing.
    4w3-5w6-8w7

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    Quote Originally Posted by strrrng View Post
    lol was it really that profound? Not sure on type, but if anything it seemed like Ti-superid musing on some more universal principle underlying a specific experience. I think IxFps tend to have a penchant for this general way of thinking, as they constantly track processes, but are simultaneously "looking" for a Ti-understanding of said things. So, within the context of Si or Ni evolution, sometimes a 'spark' will occur, and an attempt to crystallize the subjective impression into something more coherent and unchanging will ensue.

    I think if it were an alpha NT, there would be a much stronger systematic bent to the style, with less emphasis on the personal experience and tangential notions derived from said thing.
    haha, so IXfps?
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    yeah, I was thinking SEI at first.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Maybe SEI E-4?
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

  17. #17
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    Yeah, maybe sp first.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Ultimately, the style of creating the idea reflected a transfer from a Pi function to Ti IMO. Alpha NTs are much less... fluid in the way they seem to organize their ideas, and even with more abstract concepts, tend to usually find some baseline premises to establish direction, and systematize from there. This person was basically musing along in her personal experience, and extracted an underlying principle from a reaction to a stimuli.

    It very well could have reflected NeTi super-id, because of its tangential nature; IEIs tend to focus more on the thematic significance than on abstract contextual relevancy.
    4w3-5w6-8w7

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    Quote Originally Posted by strrrng View Post
    It very well could have reflected NeTi super-id, because of its tangential nature; IEIs tend to focus more on the thematic significance than on abstract contextual relevancy.
    I don't see much Ne super-id in that writing to be honest, it leans more toward Ni but a SEI E-4 does write like that at times.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Yeah, it's hard to conclusively determine. The fact that she did naturally reflect it through a lens of abstract significance, could in itself point to Ni ego; the contrasting assumption is that an SEI would maintain a sense of the tangible evolution of the event, with occasional injections of Ne, which would manifest more as interpretive exploration than actually refining the abstraction underlying the event.
    4w3-5w6-8w7

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    Jibber jabber big words Strnng you lost me in the last post. Agree it's not alpha nt writing. Well theres a possibility but i thought SEI like gilly....
    But that could be I don't think its good enough due to my own neurosis.
    IEI 4 might think after that I can't believe I wrote that shit its so godamn the same as everyone what a wonderful principle I've developed it's shitty actually, I shouldn't be a writer.
    Gilly have you decided on your type IEI or EIE?

    Strnng, Gilly, and Morcheeba all think so much like me. So much for being E-4. All beta NF's though more relevant.

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    haha... if I wrote that, I would most definitely reread it with a sense of contempt, because of the blatant triteness of it. har har a dead spider induced my survival fear and I'm no better than it *insert rumination over sociopathy*... now I'll turn it into something philosophical to embellish the very truth I proclaim. sigh.
    4w3-5w6-8w7

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    I would personally guess Fe-ESFj. Seems to make more "sense" and flow traditionally, versus an ISFps writing which typically has more obscure and eccentric tones.

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    Thats a pretty good guess too.

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