An EIE/ENFj oblivious to other people's preferences

[Joy]

There's someone who I'm pretty sure is an EIE, but she seems pretty oblivious to other people's irritation or reluctance to go along with her plans. Sometimes I think she just doesn't care about what other people want (this would be in terms of what we're eating, which activity we're doing, etc.) and doesn't notice as a result. She also makes jokes that she finds hilarious... and no one else does... and she cracks up, laughing really loudly while others are politely chuckling or just standing there.

You'd think a Fe dominant type would be less oblivious? Can someone shine some light on this?

[marooned]

She was raised in a barn.

[Joy]

She was raised by alcoholics, actually.

[Kristiina]

damn, and I actually unignored you for that. She doesn't sound pleasant. I hope she's not ENFj. Or maybe you're the only one who doesn't get any of her jokes. Or maybe she's ESTp.

[Suomea]

damn, and I actually unignored you for that. She doesn't sound pleasant. I hope she's not ENFj. Or maybe you're the only one who doesn't get any of her jokes. Or maybe she's ESTp.

Yeah sometimes I have a hard time distinguishing between ENFj and ESTp.

[Joy]

damn, and I actually unignored you for that. She doesn't sound pleasant. I hope she's not ENFj. Or maybe you're the only one who doesn't get any of her jokes. Or maybe she's ESTp.

I've considered that possibility, but she seems to have a Si PoLR.

[Pierreuse]

I know one who is like this. It might be weak Ni? She is constantly running around and recruiting people to go with her but she forces them to go with her to a bunch of stores while they're out with her and walk around inside for hours while she looks at crap. She changes the topic of every conversation to be about random shit like gossip about people only one person in the group knows that can go on forever and laughs extremely loud and talks to herself a lot or will suddenly start paying way too much attention to you. Other EIEs I've met are typically very self-conscious. Even some of her friends are EIEs and are very self-conscious and quiet around her, but she isn't at all until someone actually shows signs of not liking her. I still love hanging out with her though. Could hang out with her for days and not want to go home until I run out of money.

[betterthan]

Poor social skills...in EIEs tends to relate to a history of social rejection and bad family background. It's like they are trying to force dominance, and importance and this oscilates with cringey attempts to achieve love and acceptance. Admiration is what they crave, and some have had no luck in getting it. I think they ignore reactions in people, because they want to 'obliterate' the constant presence of social rejection in their lives in a sense. If you watch a more positive relationship with a fair amount of soild people, or a good romantic attachment, they get more comfortable in their own skill and their social aptitude develops.They realize they have genuine things to be appreciated for so don't need to do all this cringeworthy 'i'm so great shit'. Insecurity makes for poor relationships and social presence.

Also being an EIE really doesn't make you fun or interesting or socially skilled just by being an EIE. Some people just have poor social skills...

Also as ni/fe, I know in my case at times ^_^, we can tend to like to make an impact, and we know it isn't positive, but we don't much care, so long as we are making one. When i'm bored or annoyed, I can have quite a negative impact, and know that i'm having one